Peeled: Matthew 11:28-30: Be Gentle

Introduction

Hudson cleaning his room at 4 a.m. Learning that he has to care for his stuff.

Fruit of the Spirit - qualities of Christ growing within us that help us care well for others - That’s what this world needs - to know we care! Jesus cares, Northwood cares, and I care...

Gentleness is important because people are delicate. Everyone is broken. We have all experienced the affects of sin. We all know that life is a mess. We all have our challenges.

We all know that people struggle and hurt, yet we treat each other so poorly. We don’t handle each other with care.

There probably aren’t many of us who would describe ourselves as gentle. Probably not many of us that want to be described as gentle.

We don’t live in a gentle world. We live in a harsh world. Gentleness is not a quality people long for. We want strength, and gentleness seems so weak.

BUT - gentleness is not weakness. It takes much strength to be gentle. It doesn’t take much strength to be harsh, aggressive and hurtful. However, it does take much strength to restrain from being harsh and hurtful.

Gentleness is the ability to endure without aggression and the ability to handle people with care.

Jesus is the epitome of gentleness. We think of someone who is gentle as a pushover. Jesus wasn’t a pushover. He spoke truth. He called out sin. He even overturned tables in righteous anger. However, Jesus didn’t leave heaven and come to earth to push us down and condemn us for our brokenness. He came to fix what was broken. He handles us with care because we are precious in His sight.

This morning, I want you to see two truths that every gentle person lives by.

Everyone needs a burden bearer.

Burdened. We all feel it. We feel the burdens of life. We feel the burdens of our sin - guilt and shame.

Jesus knows our burdens. He knew the burdens of the first-century Jew:

The burden of sin: “My sin is ever before me” (Psalm 51). Sin affects everything.

The burden of religion: trying to keep the 613 commands of the Law. Who could even remember them? Burdened because you were constantly confronted with your inability to do what God required.

Religious leaders had developed the oral law. The religious law told you for example how many steps you could take on the Sabbath before you violated the sabbath.

Jesus said that the Pharisees tied up heavy loads to put on the shoulders of people that were too much to bear, and yet the Pharisees themselves wouldn’t live up to the standard they imposed on others (Matthew 23:4).

The burden of life: oppressed by Rome. Life was hard.

We’ve all felt the burden of this world: Life is just hard, and I don’t know how I’m going to make it.

We felt the burden of life so we came to religion hoping it would ease our burdens and give us a solution for our sin, but it hasn’t. For some, religion just makes you feel guiltier because you’re not living the right way.

Jesus offers an unexpected yet comforting invitation: “Do you feel weary and burdened? Come to me. I will give you rest.”

Jesus doesn’t put conditions on the invitation. “Come to me if you can prove yourself worthy of the invitation…”

Jesus promises something far different than a burden, He promises rest. Imagine a life where you felt rested. (Seriously going to take my wife to Tanger… I get 5 hours… Jesus promises me more than 5 hours… He promises me eternity of rest…) Not a life where all of the stuff you struggle with is taken away, but a life in which you are constantly refreshed so that you can take on the challenges of life.

How can Jesus promise a life of rest? Because of His gentleness. Jesus knows our sin and has every right to condemn. He knows that the reason why the world is broken is because of us. Yet, Jesus chose to come to this earth not to rub our faces in the mess we had made - not to condemn us but to save us.

vs. 29 - “I am lowly and humble in heart.” Jesus could have described Himself in lots of ways. E.g., He is righteous in heart, just in heart, etc. Or, I am POWERFUl in heart - even though He is ALL-POWERFUL. If you have power you want everyone to know it. Powerful people like to show they are superior. When you think power you don’t think lowly. Jesus - the One who has all authority - who sits in the seat of authority - came to this earth as a lowly servant. Put on flesh, became one of us to die for us. “In heart” it’s His essence. The essence of the most powerful person in the universe is lowly and gentle.

Jesus’ gentleness causes Him to handle us with care by removing our burden and giving us rest. Jesus knew we could not live up to God’s holy standard, so He did it for us by obeying on our behalf and voluntarily offering up His life as a sacrifice for our sins, paying the price for our rebellion against God. He rose again to give us new life.

He removes the burden of life by placing His yoke upon us and calling us to follow Him.

Jesus doesn’t add to our burdens. He takes our burdens away. He doesn’t make life harder for us. He makes life purposeful and joyous.

Everyone needs a burden bearer, not a burden adder.

Some of us are burden adders. We know the enormous weight that people are carrying, and yet we add to the burden by placing unrealistic expectations and demands on people: be who I want you to be and act how I want you to act.

Gentle people point others to the burden bearer rather than adding to the burdens of others. How do you tend to add to the burdens of others:

I add to the burdens of others when I am easily exasperated. Instead of gentle, easily agitated. When people don’t respond your way, you get irritated real easy. Some people don’t like to be around you because they know you’re a ticking time bomb.

I add to the burdens of others when I am reactionary. You react. You don’t think before you speak or how your reactions might affect others. You let others know how their failures affect and inconvenience you.

I add to the burdens of others when I am harsh. The tone of your voice, the look in your eyes, the hurt you cause because someone isn’t doing what you want them to do or living the way you want to live.

For many, we live this way: exasperated, reactionary, and harsh because people aren’t living up to our expectations or demands. Not gentle at all but like a bull in a China shop in the way we deal with people. It doesn’t help anyone, and it doesn’t make you feel better either.

This is not the way of Jesus! Even when He overturned the tables, it wasn’t harsh. It was a measured response to people were rejecting God’s way of worship.

I point people to the burden bearer when:

I respond with grace instead of anger. In that moment when we’re angry with the wrong someone has done to us, “I’m better than you.” I’m not any better than anyone else. I need grace just as much as the next person. I’ve received grace. Who am I to withhold grace?

I stay calm and compassionate. Woman at well or woman caught in act of adultery. Jesus doesn’t say, “What’s wrong with you!” Instead He helps them to see their sin and says, “Go, and sin no more.” When I lash out in anger, I hurt instead of restore.

I show care more than I demand care. Handle with care. People are precious in the sight of God, and what is precious in the sight of God should be precious in your sight as well. You expect care when you are burdened, but you have a hard time giving it when you see the burdens of others.

Basketball card and wedding ring: lost because I didn’t handle with care. What are you losing relationally because you refuse to handle with care?

Everyone needs a different way of life.

Yoke - submission. Whatever you are yoked to controls you.

Yoked to sin. Yoked to the idol of career, wealth, etc. It controls you and makes you miserable.

Yoked to Jesus. You can let the One how is gentle and lowly take control of your life and lead you to a different way of life.

Jesus says, “Take my yoke and learn from me.” Don’t learn from a world that’s going to constantly add crushing burden to your life.

Yoke yourself to Jesus. He’s the only Master that will give you rest, joy, peace, forgiveness, etc. The only way to be truly free is to yoke yourself to the Master who sets you free.

You’re going to be yoked to something. Choose the right yoke!

Jesus says His yoke is easy and His burden is light. NOT saying that following Him is a life of ease, but He is saying that when you take His yoke upon yourself it is not painful drudgery. The Christians faith is hard. It requires sacrifice. It even requires suffering, but when you know that He has taken the burdens of your sins upon Himself in exchange for His burden of a life of sacrifice and service to His Kingdom, His burden is a delight.

Gentle people help others put on the right yoke by making three commitments:

I will be a person of rest, not stress. Jesus gives rest. I want people to experience the rest of Jesus - to know there is forgiveness and hope. I can’t point people to rest in Christ if I’m stressing them out. I point people to rest as I bless people, encourage people, love people, etc. Are you a person of rest or stress?

I will be a person of loving truth, not crushing guilt. Silent treatment, biting sarcasm, comparing someone to others, telling someone how disappointed you are in them… Some of you have gotten good at using guilt trips… That’s not gentleness… The Gospel removes guilt... When someone disappoints you speak the truth in love: “I forgive you because Jesus has forgiven me...” “I love you because Jesus loves me,” etc. Gospel saturation - Making Jesus a normal part of my conversations. EVERY conversation is an opportunity to point someone to the hope of Jesus. Don’t waste your conversations!

I will be a person who sees brokenness, not ignores brokenness. Change our approach to people from “Suck it up,” “Try harder,” “Why can’t you get it right,” to, “I’m going to help you. Jesus hasn’t given up on you, and I’m not giving up on you." There’s brokenness you’re choosing to ignore because you don’t want to get in the mess.

Jesus came and got in your mess. He bore your burden to calvary and suffered and died in your place so that you could experience the gentle, forgiving love of the Father. This morning, Jesus doesn’t condemn you. Instead, He invites you to know Him. He invites you to take His yoke upon you by believing that He died and rose again for you.

Struggle with gentleness? Ask God to forgive you of being rough with people.