GOING ALL THE WAY! PART 3

Matthew 19:3 Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?”

Matthew 19:4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’

Matthew 19:5 And he said, ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’

Matthew 19:6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

INTRODUCTION

Good morning Southpointe! We are ending our marriage series this morning “Going all the way!”

Some of you are saying thank you Jesus, and some are saying well, I guess it was ok and a few of you are saying I wish it could go another month.

I want to talk to you about making up your mind to go all the way.

Let me take you down memory lane this morning.

I want to show you a few pictures of my going all the way decision and results.

Engagement pictures.

Marriage pictures.

Children pictures.

Marriage pictures of our children.

Grandchildren pictures.

Doing life together pictures.

What I can tell you is that to have a successful marriage, one that will go all the way, you must set up goals.

And the first goals must be to have a Christ-centered marriage.

What does that mean? Being Christ-centered is different than just calling yourself a Christian.

Christ-centered marriage is take effort to follow Christ and to be Christ-centered.

For a marriage to be Christ-Centered then both the husband and wife must be in a Christ-Centered relationship with The One.

And then we are Christ-Centered marriage and we are mission driven, we are devil kicking and we are covenant keeping.

Today, I wanna talk to you about being covenant- keeping in our relationships. What does that mean, and how do we live this out?

In our text this Matthew chapter 19.

A conversation some Pharisees had with Jesus when Scripture says this. "Some Pharisees came to Jesus to test Him.

"They asked, Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife "for any and every reason?"

Sounds like these guys were looking for a loophole in their marriages, and Jesus replied, that at the beginning "the Creator made them male and female, "and He said, for this reason a man will leave his father "and mother and be united to his wife, "and the two will become one flesh."

Look at what Jesus said. "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. "Therefore what God has joined together, "let no one separate."

Let’s understand the truth that our God unites.

What God unites, our spiritual enemy schemes to divide.

So this morning I want to look at three different approaches to marriages.

Casual approach to marriage.

Marriage isn't that big of a deal. It's really just a piece of paper.

Contractual approach

Marriage is a contract, we sign on the dotted lines, and here is our agreement.

Covenant approach

This is the idea that marriage is a holy covenant established by God

Let's talk about what a covenant is. The word covenant comes from an Old Testament Hebrew word, briyth means a cutting.

You see for a covenant to get established, there's always a shedding of blood.

In the Old Testament, if two people were to enter into a covenant, there would often be a shedding of blood of a bull, or maybe of seven lambs.

If two people were entering into a covenant by use the bull, they would kill the bull, cut the bull in half.

There'd be half a bull and half a bull, and then two people would walk around the bull, both of them, seven times. And as they are walking around those seven times they are quote an oath, saying what happened to this bull should happen to me if I don’t live up to my oath.

And then they would walk down between the half together.

This is a covenant, a shedding of blood, giving my word that this is a commitment that I will stick by. Going all the way!!

If you go to an Old Testament Hebrew wedding, what you would see is, you would see a powerful covenantal ceremony.

The priest would ask for the hand of both the groom and the bride, and the priest would take a knife, and cut, nick, the hand of the groom and the hand of the bride, so that blood would come from their hands, a shedding of blood.

Then the priest would join the bride and the groom's hands together so that the blood would mingle.

This was signifying that,

Lev 17:14 The life of every creature is in its blood. That is why I have said to the people of Israel, 'You must never eat or drink blood, for the life of any creature is in its blood.' So whoever consumes blood will be cut off from the community.

What Leviticus says, the life of the person is in the blood. We are exchanging life.

Then the priest would bind their hands together, showing outwardly that the two are in the process of becoming one.

Then they would share their covenant vows, both before family and friends, and before God.

Then what the couple would do is they would depart for a time. They would go to a place called a chuppah.

The chuppah was like the bridal suite. It was like the honeymoon room, and the couple would leave the wedding ceremony and everyone else would wait while they go to the chuppah.

Now listen to this: In the chuppah, they would chuppah. In theory, the virgin groom would enter into the virgin bride and there would be a shedding of blood, and physically they would become one flesh, representing what has happened in the spirit.

Then, once they've sealed their holy covenant, they would come back to the party that was waiting for them. That is going all the way!!

They had become one, Spiritual and physically.

And they started building their Christ-centered life together as One.

So my old life was gone because of the blood that was shed. And now I have become new.

Does this sound familiar?

2 Cor 5:15 He died for everyone so that those who receive His new life will no longer live for themselves. Instead, they will live for Christ, who died and was raised for them.

Do you see this, the shedding of the blood for new life, and no longer living for ourselves but for Christ.

The marriage of Christ and the Church does represent the marriage between husband and wife.

So, I want to look at the THE CHARACTERISTICS OF A HUSBAND’S LOVE.

1. It is peculiar in its nature, unlike the love of parent or child, friend or neighbor. "The husband is to love his wife even as himself."

Ephesians 5:28 In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.

2. It is single, exclusive, and undivided in its object; for the husband is to devote to his one wife all the affection of his life.

Proverbs 5:18 Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth.

Proverbs 5:19 She is a loving deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you always. May you always be captivated by her love.

3. Be considerate and tender, excluding all bitterness. "Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them"

Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly.

It is being loved that will make it unnecessary for the husband ever to command his wife.

The gospel counterpart of "Wives submit yourselves to your own husbands," is not "Husbands, command our wives." but "love your wives."

Love your wife: Many husbands do not know how to love their wife. Here some ways that The Word of God tells us how to love our wives.

a. In providing support of his wife. The husband is to "nourish and cherish" his wife.

1 Tim 5:8 But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

b. Husband must consult her happiness and pleasure.

1 Corinthians 7:33 But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife.

c. He must protect her life, her honor, her good name.

1 Peter 3:7 In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.

d. He is to seek her spiritual welfare. He is to pray for her and with her, remembering that she is your partner, you are in this together, you are one in this new life together.

Ephesians 5:25-26  For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.

4. The wife’s love is not to be taken for granted because she is not commanded to love her husband.

The husband is to love her as he want her to love him.

The married life is impossible without mutual affection.

Love must be the basis of marriage.

Now ladies did you think that I was going to leave you out. Save the best for last.

The duties of wives.

I. THE DUTIES OF WIVES. They are all summed up in the one word—subjection.

It is singular that The Word of God does not command the wife to love her husband as the husband is commanded to love his wife.

The husband is to be the head; yet he is not commanded to govern; but he is commanded to love, but the part of the wife is submission.

The wife will love more naturally and more passionately than man, because her love is not subject of command, it is taken for granted.

But the Word of God commands her to obey and honor her husband as the best expression of this love.

Jeremy Taylor says, "He rules her by authority, she rules him by love; she ought by all means to please him, and he must by no means displease her."

Her great duty, then, is subjection. So Let’s look at what this involves.

1. Subjection is not servitude.

It is not like the obedience of servants to masters, nor even like that of children to parents.

It is a submission that recognizes the husband’s rule as being just, tender, and wise.

2. Subjection is a wise and loving obedience.

Wives are "to be obedient to their own husbands"

Titus 2:4-5 These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.

3. Subjection within limits, the wives are to be subject to their husbands "in everything," that is, in everything within the husband’s authority, for they are not to obey him in anything contrary to God and his Law.

Wives are to obey God rather than man.

Understand that the wife’s obedience is not to be forced but should come forth out of her affection to her husband, her dependence upon him, and her recognition of the just grounds of love and obedient to the things of God.

There are two points:

The first is that woman derived her being from man. Eve was taken out of Adam.

"This is now bone of my bone, and flesh of my flesh."

Blood came out and flesh was cut.

The second point is that, in the marriage union, man and woman are said to become one flesh.

"For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the twain shall become one flesh."

The wife, then, being one flesh with the husband, there comes into support of the duty of the husband.

Then the principle of self-preservation.

"He that loveth his own wife loveth himself: for no man ever hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it."

So this morning we are going to do a renewal of vows.