Deal Gently
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Introduction: Welcome (mention title change)/Prayer
Our text is 2 Samuel 18:1-19:8
We’re going to see two sides of David this morning...
We’re first look at a positive aspect of David, which is in keeping with him being a type of Christ, a foreshadow of the Christ to come...
Then in chapter 19 we’ll look at a negative aspect of David, which will remind us that he is but a mere shadow of the Promised Messiah… and in that we will consider where King David falls short, how our king, Jesus does not...
For each section, we’ll read the text, work through, and then draw out the lessons provided for us
2 Samuel 18
In following Hushai’s advice, Absalom has taken his time in building his own army to chase down David...
This has allowed David time to gather those loyal to him and organize it for battle
David has his two nephews, Joab and Abishai, overseeing each a 1/3 of the men, with the the Gittite, Ittai, overseeing remaining 3rd...
David himself intended to go out, but in good wisdom, similar to what Ahithophel advised Absalom, in that Ahithophel suggested that he, not Absalom go out into battle....
David’s men, likewise advised David to stay and urged him to stay off the battlefield… for the battle was essentially, like a game of chess… the pawns, knights, bishops, rooks, and even the queen, do not compare to the the value of the king.... for if the king were to fall the battle would be lost...
As the army marches out and David watches… David gave very clear, very explicit orders to his three commanders… in v. 5, deal gently with Absalom
And he gave the orders in a manner so that all the people heard how to regard David’s son Absalom...
So, the army heads out and David has decided that his men will fight in the forest of Ephraim.
The forest helps level the playing field between the two armies...
For unlike a wide open plain, a larger army would find it harder to use their numbers as an advantage...
As the terrain of the forest would inevitably break up and divide the army into smaller sections…
It also allows for cover and better movement for a smaller force
This choice of battleground proves very favorable for David… in v. 8, it says the forest devoured more people that day than the sword.
Men probably became lost in the course of the battle or in the retreat… most likely on both sides, but especially the losing side
The forest, probably also caused a variety of injuries and resulting death due to the difficult terrain combined with the “fog of war”… that is the disorientation, the tunnel vision, and so forth… men falling down ravines, into pits, and what not...
A very bloodied day with 20,000 men dying… similar to the causalities lost on the bloodiest day of our Civil War at the Battle of Antietam
In the midst of Absalom’s army retreating, Absalom comes across David’s men and in his haste to get away he gets stuck in an oak branch...
How does this happen? Perhaps his beautifully thick hair got tangled up… and in rather than being scalped he let go of the donkey to grab his hair so it wouldn’t be forced off his head… in doing so he’s stuck...
Or perhaps, somehow, his head managed to get wedged into a tight space of an oak branch and he is hanging there… I think the hair situation is the most likely scenario.
Either way, he’s stuck…
A man reports it back to Joab, and Joab, being his usual insolent self is angry the man didn’t strike him down...
The man however, showing exceptional loyalty to David by defying Joab, and knowing the king sees all, tells him not even a thousand pieces of silver would cause him to betray his king… if only Judas had such faith in his king...
Joab growing frustrated takes the matter into his own hands...
Taking with him ten armor-bearers, Joab comes up to David’s son and strikes him with three javelins… followed by his armor-bearers finishing the job and then dumping Absalom’s body into a pit in the forest.
With the rebellious king dead, this effectively ends the battle...
We then read of how Absalom during his lifetime had built a monument for himself… like Saul did… the only other one to do so in the OT...
A monument to oneself isn’t the only thing Saul and Absalom share… but their fate was the same… death on the battlefield.
Let’s talk about this monument real quick...
We’re told here in verse 18, that Absalom built it in part because he had no sons… yet 2 Samuel 14:27, tells us Absalom had three sons...
The text doesn’t explain this… the only explanation is that they must have died by the time he built the monument.
The lack of clarity on this is no matter as it does not impact the narrative of the text....
Rather this is a historical side note explaining the origins of the monument of Absalom which was still standing at the time 2 Samuel was written.
Now, following the battle, Ahimaaz wants to be the messenger… Joab knowing this news will upset David sends an Ethiopian, that is a Cushite… but Ahimaaz persists and finally Joab lets him..
Now, the Cushite left first, and took the shorter route… yet Ahimaaz still beats him to David… how?
Cushite took the direct route which was over difficult terrain...
Ahimaaz… took the open plain… longer… yes, but flat.
Ahimaaz upon arriving gives David the big picture news… he has won… but David is concerned for his son… and Ahimaaz deflects the answer...
The Cushite will be the one to tell David and when asked the Cushite answers tactfully and a bit vaguely… without naming Absalom, nor how Absalom died… the Cushite tells him that his fate is like that of all who rise up against David.
The news breaks David… and David weeps greatly crying out that he wished he had died instead of Absalom...
Why such love for a son who was rebellious?
And not simply hard-headed or stiffed-necked…
As one who might break curfew regularly… but a son who over a period of years intentionally and deliberately disobeyed his father and commited treason as he sought the throne of his father illegally… staking claim to something he had no right doing...
A man who disgraced the name of David by sleeping with his concubines openly for all to see…
A son who sought the death of his own father… and willing to kill others for that objective to be achieved.
To mourn for a son, no matter how evil, is perhaps understandable...
But how could the king, how could David, at the beginning of all this, in verse 5, command his people, and expect them to deal gently with such a rebellious, treasonous, unholy son?
Surely, death was the right sentence for this man as he was an enemy of the king and the king’s people.
Yet, once again David exhibits compassion towards his enemies… and in doing so exemplifies the teaching of Jesus in Lk 6:27
27 “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
We, who are outsiders looking in… and after reading all that Absalom has done in the previous chapters, how can we not be a bit confused by David’s restraint towards Absalom?
To help us with our confusion, let us remind ourselves of why David is in this predicament to begin with...
Chapters 11 & 12… David in despising the Word of the Lord, commits sexual immorality with Bathsheba, then murders her husband Uriah…
David’s restraint, his compassion, in part, is rooted in his own acknowledgement of his own sin and understanding the justice he himself deserved.... yet....
David was shown mercy, and as such he desires mercy towards Absalom
We must remember, that whatever we think Absalom was to David, and whatever we think Absalom deserved for judgment by the hand of the Lord’s Anointed…
We need to consider how much more so are we to our holy Father… and how much more deserving are we of judgment by the Lord’s Anointed… the Messiah, Jesus Christ?
Whatever we believe in regard to how evil, how rebellious, how treasonous Absalom was to David… and whatever we believe is the fit judgment of such a man who shook his fist against the Lord’s anointed… whatever we believe in that matter....
We must understand we are far worse than Absalom… we deserve far worse than Absalom for what we have done before our Holy Father and His Anointed, Jesus Christ
We must be careful in how we react to David being “soft” towards Absalom… we must not become arrogant in it…
David might have been soft, but he desired reconciliation...
Consider the words of David in Psalm 103:13
13 As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.
David’s desire to reconcile with Absalom was most likely rooted in the compassion that Yahweh had shown David, time and time again… all of Psalm 103 speaks to this truth…
Therefore, let us not forget ourselves when we see a righteous king act mercifully towards a rebellious son…
Just as our Holy Father does for us…
David, the Lord’s anointed, was willing to lay his life down for Absalom’s… even though Absalom was the guilty one… the one deserving of death.... and David desired his people to deal gently with the boy… in this way David is a type of Christ… as his compassion foreshadows that of the promised One… the Messiah, Jesus...
Where upon the cross, Jesus, expressed the same desire...
Lk 23:34
34 And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments.
In other words, “Father, deal gently with them”… be merciful…
Let us then humble ourselves....
And rather than being confused or perhaps even bitter that David or anyone could show mercy to another…
Let us instead, be grateful that our Lord and Savior desires that our Father deal gently with us… desiring reconciliation with all who have rebelled against Him....
Now, let us read the first 8 verses of chapter 19, and see while David did well in demonstrating the compassion of God to his enemies… he doesn’t do so well in doing the same to those who were loyal to him...
2 Samuel 19:1-8
David’s mourning over Absalom is so great… that the victory, the good news of the day, was turned to a day of grieving… essentially, as a day of defeat...
Those who were victors went into the city from the battlefield not as those who had won a great battle… but as those with great shame upon them...
Imagine… spending the day, engaged in a great bloody battle for your king… for his name… for his sake…
Witnessing the suffering and death of your relatives while suffering your own wounds...
Yet, upon return, the very person for whom you gave so much for… is weeping… grieving…
Where’s the fanfare? Where’s the warm reception? Where’s the appreciation?
This of course is not good for a king to do… especially when he is trying to regain control of his land…
However, Joab awakens David to action...
For Joab, calls out the king in his grief, and calls him to action by using strong language, and honest language… v. 6… “you love those who hate you and hate those who love you”...
And if you keep this up… you will lose the kingdom
Now, the compassion of David to his enemies is to be commended… but in this case it has become a snare…
In David’s mourning he has allowed himself to become blinded by his own grief and neglects his duty as king and neglects his people...
Whereas earlier David showed us what it looks like to love our enemies… David here reminds us he is human...
Earlier we saw the compassion of God in David...
But now, as David laments the outcome of Absalom’s life and neglects his faithful people, we must ask this question...
If earlier, David being a type of Christ, foreshadowed the mercy of Christ… does he do the same here?
Absolutely not… David is a mere man… a type of Christ is a shadow of Christ...
Imperfect, fading, partial…
David is the moon and Christ is the sun… we see the moon at night, but the light is not from the moon, it is from the sun… and only when the moon is in the right position to reflect the light of the sun...
David only reflects to us the righteousness of Christ when he is in a right position with God to reflect God’s righteousness...
If anything, this moment in David’s grief reminds us, David is merely a shadow, merely a moon… that when it is not in the right position in regard to the sun, it is just as dark as the rest of the planet that lies in the night.
David’s men… the ones who served the Lord’s anointed faithfully returned to a weeping a king… a king consumed by grief… perceived as an ungrateful king… and in the words of Joab, a hateful king.
If these men, those who decided to follow David, whatever the cost, who gave so much for the Lord’s anointed, received such a welcome....
Then what those who are called by David’s Son to give up so much for His sake, what are they to receive?
And it’s no small cost… consider Mk 8.34
34 And calling the crowd to him with his disciples, he said to them, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.
Or Lk 14:26-27
26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. 27 Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.
To be faithful to David meant risk, sacrifice, service… even death for some...
It’s not different for those faithful to the Son of David, Jesus Christ...
We who confess with our mouths and believe in our hearts Jesus to be Lord and Savior.... we are called to battle… not so much because we are looking for a fight...
But purely because our loyalty to the one true king… causes the usurper of this world, to rally his forces against God’s King and God’s people…
Like David and his men being chased down by Absalom and his men...
Jesus and His church is continually hunted and chased down by the Absaloms of this world...
So, it begs the question… what awaits us when this battle is over?
We who weep and mourn on the regular because the war of righteousness wears us down?
We who sever our roots, never to lay them down again, so that we may serve our King wherever He calls us?
We who have sacrificed relationships, jobs, reputation, and the like for the sake of His gospel and His will?
What will our reception be? Will it be equal to these men of David?
Though men, like David are imperfect… God’s perfect Word is clear on this matter… those who are faithful to God… to the Lord’s Anointed, Jesus Christ… pure glory awaits them.
2 Cor 4.17-18
17 For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, 18 as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.
How long is the affliction?
Momentary.... your whole life is momentary
How heavy is it?
Light....
Now compare to what awaits us… eternal weight of glory...
how does Paul describe it?
“Eternal Weight”...
Similar to what he says in Rom 8.18
18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.
1 Peter 1:6-7
6 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.
If you’re faithful… and you’ll know it as you are tested in battle… know that in the day of our Lord, upon His return… praise, glory, and honor, awaits you… because you will share in the Son’s glory as He shares His Father’s glory with you…
Rom 8.17
17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.
Those who suffer with Christ will be glorified with Him… and to suffer with Him is to go into the dark forest of Ephraim and fight for Him…
But we do not fight as the world fights… remember, we are not of this world… we are set apart, we are different… understand this...
Brothers, sisters… let us remember that while we were still sinners… while we were still hostile in mind, treasonous and rebellious against our God, as Absalom was towards David…
Our Father, He sought and granted reconciliation through His anointed one… Jesus Christ...
Therefore, let us deal gently with others… enduring great loss if we must... let us boldly go into the Forests of the World as victors, as conquerors, and more than conquerors for God is with us and death has been defeated....
So, let us fight boldly, confidently, enduring all things in love, knowing that our King, is no mere man, like David, but He is the God-Man, who is perfect in all His ways… and for those of us who persevere to the end, suffering for Christ… an eternal, unending glory awaits…
Now, hear these words again… fight boldly, confidently, enduring all things in love… these are words of action… action rooted in doctrine, in the truths of Scripture, in the promises of the Gospel… we don’t simply believe these things and not act.
We don’t simply affirm Christ as Lord and Savior and remain in our bubbles… we must not think, as I think is often the case… that to live our faith boldly and confidently one must be facing some form of active persecution or threat…
Rather it is by living in such a way... that persecution and threat is brought about…
This means you fight by sacrificing your time for the benefit of the body...
You prioritize Christ, and His Body, the church, above all things…
Doesn’t mean you neglect other things or you neglect your family… but you include them, you incorporate them…
This impacts all of our relationships with others...
How we love our spouses…
Our children… co-workers...
Our neighbors… and those who are different from us in every way...
There is no realm, no perspective, no sphere of life that is exempt...
We must be willing to fight the good fight our faith...
In previous weeks we’ve talked about how the Absaloms of our day seek to distract us from our focus of the Truth… and those things we most definitely ought to fight against… but we must also fight against the desires of our flesh as well…
We must resist pornography and the sexual mindset of this age
We must take control of ourselves and resist gluttony, drunkenness, and laziness
And we must be sober-minded and watchful that we don’t engage in idolatry… especially in political or sociological idolatry for those who practice any of these things do not inherit the kingdom… and will not share in the eternal glory of Christ. (1 Cor 6:9-10)
9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.
And when you do come across a pornographer, an adulterer, a drunkard, a glutton, a sloth, a liar, an idolater, a cheat… deal gently with that person… fight the good faith by being merciful as our king has dealt with us… for as Paul says in 1 Cor 6:11
11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
And remember this truth… recall the certain unnamed man of chapter 18 who found Absalom… the rebel, the traitor…
Recall the truth he knew… nothing is hidden from the king… not King David, and especially not King Jesus
We need to remember that all of us… will stand before the judgment seat of Christ 2 Cor 5.10
10 For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.
Paul is talking to those who are already justified, already saved and redeemed… we will be judged by the things we do in the body, in the flesh… an ethical judgment… justified by faith alone through grace alone yes… but the witness, the evidence, that will prove such a verdict is rooted in the fruit of the Spirit and abstaining from the sins of the world ...
Which includes, the primary point of this message… be merciful..
He will remember if you dealt gently with others or not… He will know if you cut down another without compassion, without grace… He will know if you who have received mercy have extended it to others or not… don’t forget the parable of the unforgiving servant in Matthew 18...
The man owed ten thousand talents… it was forgiven..
Yet, he was unwilling to forgive a debt owed him of 100 talents...
What did the master do there? Threw him in prison until he paid all of his debt… a debt which was so great he could never pay back…
So, let us deal gently towards others remembering the debt we have been forgiven
And in the words of Paul in 1 Tim 6:12
12 Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses.
And we do that now with communion… we stand as one body, as we come to the table, confessing Christ as Lord and Savior, our redeemer, our propitiation for our sins… for it was His shed blood that provided us forgiveness before the Father… to be reconciled with Him, so that we may be made anew, for good works that were prepared beforehand, for the good fight of our faith so that we may share in His glory forever and ever, amen.