Riley and Katie Zomer
Notes
Transcript
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.
So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
You guys have chosen a common passage that is heard in wedding ceremonies, 1 Corinthians 13 verses 1 through 13. We certainly won’t capture every aspect of the 13 verses, but we’ll aim for a few. Let’s hear the word of the Lord.
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.—Pray
Riley and Katie, commit yourselves to love. That’s rather simple and ordinary, doesn’t it? It’s not very profound. Both of you know about commitments and have already participated in some. You committed yourselves to each other in a marriage proposal and now this afternoon your vows. You’ve committed to paying back debts according to certain terms when you’ve taken out a loan. You’ve committed yourselves to jobs—whether a schedule and expectations that an employer or a manager gave you or to carrying out the necessary work that comes with operating a farm. You grasp commitment.
So again, I say to you, I encourage you, I challenge you, commit yourselves to love. Moments ago, that was basically what you guys said when you said, “I do,” and so what does that look like? Three lessons to take away from 1 Corinthians 13. First, a reflection, why do we need to be reminded of this? I told you in our counseling sessions, I’m hesitant about preaching 1 Corinthians 13 in wedding ceremonies because this is not first and foremost about spousal love, husband and wife love. Verses 1 through 3 tell us, “If I speak in tongues…If I [can prophesy and have extraordinary wisdom] and a faith that can move mountains…If I [could be so selfless and so sacrificial].” Those are gifts and callings of a Christian, of someone who has been transformed by God and gifted with his Holy Spirit. These are awesome things, and yet the point Paul is making is that the essential component for believers is not action, but love, and not just any love but agape.
We’ll get to what that is in a moment, but what if we don’t have love? This passage, while I’m hesitant, is appropriate for you as husband and wife, if you are living in the Lord, because what you have by faith should trickle down into your marriage. But what if we try to live our lives without the essential component, without the key that is part of our faith and relationships? What if we stop committing ourselves to love? Well, Paul says, “I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal,”—all I’m good for is noise; no substance, no connection. He goes farther, without love, I am nothing and I gain nothing. I can do things. You can do things. We can do things that seem like they should be beautiful, right, and helpful actions, but without the key, the commitment to love, we get lost in life and in marriage.
We need to be reminded because in our sinfulness we are prone to fall short in love. We can do things and think things and envision that we do really love our spouses, our families, and others, but are we really loving them? It is necessary, be rooted and commit yourselves to love.
Our second lesson now, what is love, really? I won’t re-read verses 4 through 9, but we heard what love is and is not. It is patient and kind and protecting and trusting and persevering. It is not envious or boasting or keeping records or failing. If we go back to the Greek, the original language that the New Testament was written in, we find this word “agape” which when translated to English it comes out “love.” Agape is used either 8 or 9 times explicitly in these 13 verses, and then it is assumed quite a few more times. What is it?
Agape is first and foremost the love which our Triune God has within the three persons. In Matthew 3:17, we find God the Father describing Jesus the Son as his beloved, he loves him with this agape form of love. It’s the same word in John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” All those love qualities we find in 1 Corinthians 13, that’s how God thinks of us despite our sin. It is because of that essence of love in God that he sent a Redeemer for all who turn to him. In John 15 verse 12, it is agape that Jesus called us to love one another with, and John 14 verse 23 that we are invited to love Jesus and thereby God with agape.
I could keep going, my Bible software said there are 320 times this word shows up in the New Testament, but I’ll leave it there. Love in the Godhead, God’s love for the world, we are called to love one another, and we are called to love God. If you’ve heard a sermon including the word agape and it’s what Paul’s trying to describe in 1 Corinthians 13, this is unconditional love. Love that does not require someone to do something or meet your standard in order for you to love them and they to receive your love. It is because of who you are, it is because of a commitment you have made, you will do this. Commit yourselves to love because this is who you are as individuals and as husband and wife.
Finally, lesson number three, a reality with encouragement, love even when you fail. There will be what we hope are just moments when you stop loving, when you do things a little more independently and even selfishly than together. A day or a season will come when you revert to childish ways rather than adult or mature ways. It’s on those days especially that we need the reminder, we need this call to commitment. Your love for one another is imperfect, but love anyways, commit yourselves to love.
This is why it’s so important that we understand who Jesus is and what he has done for us as you enter into Christian marriage, a marital relationship where we pray Christ really is the center. You guys are sinners, all of us here today are sinners. Sin is the reason why we not only fail but we try to hurt—we do the opposite of love. That may seem impossible and the farthest thing away on a day like today, but it is our reality. Yet there is still one who loves perfectly. The one who literally gave his life for you, Jesus the Anointed Son of God. He did not just come and was not just sent out of love. But in love, he suffered and died even though he was innocent, and he was perfect. We were and are guilty, and he took our sin and punishment on himself. He died, so that his bride, the church, may be beautifully dressed, all our sins and blemishes may be gone, if we believe in him and have received his grace.
The end of 1 Corinthians 13 verse 12 is a beautiful part of this passage that we cannot overlook. “Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.” As you come together as husband and wife, as you live together, and laugh and cry and grieve and suffer and hopefully prosper together, you will come to know yourselves and each other in deeper ways. Sometimes that’s annoying and frustrating and makes you want to do things your way. But if you are committed to love, you are also committing yourself to be known—not only to be together, but also to be for each other.
When times get hard, Riley and Katie, consider that Jesus is the only one who fully knows us. We are flawed, but by his mercy he loves us. Know the truth of your sins, your flaws, your problems. Know that you are not able to save each other. Thank God, he gave us himself because he loved us, and mirroring his love, seek to love one another. Commit yourselves to love. Amen.