It's stupid to hate feedback...

Be Graciously Candid

Intro

The journey to 360 evaluations…

in the bible

Prov 12:1

English Standard Version Chapter 12

12 Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge,

but he who hates reproof is stupid.

Prov 15:31

If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise. 32 If you reject discipline, you only harm yourself; but if you listen to correction, you grow in understanding. 33 Fear of the Lord teaches wisdom; humility precedes honor. Prov 15:31-33

Tyndale House Publishers, Holy Bible: New Living Translation (Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 2015), Pr 15:31–33.

Solomon’s sons didn’t listen, thus dividing the kingdoms

1 Kings 12:6 Then King Rehoboam took counsel with the old men, who had stood before Solomon his father while he was yet alive, saying, “How do you advise me to answer this people?” 7 And they said to him, “If you will be a servant to this people today and serve them, and speak good words to them when you answer them, then they will be your servants forever.” 8 But he abandoned the counsel that the old men gave him and took counsel with the young men who had grown up with him and stood before him.

Moses & Jethro

Exodus 18:24 So Moses listened to the voice of his father-in-law and did all that he had said.

Paul to the council of jerusalem

Constructive Feedback vs Destructive Criticism

Feedback – a reaction or response to a particular behavior, process or activity (constructive).

Criticism – the act of passing judgment as to the merits of anything (destructive).

Feedback is a gift…criticism is destructive

Clear and Concise:

Ensure you have clearly identified the items you would like to discuss and the actions and outcomes you would like to come out from it.

Avoid these 3 phrases

You always…(doesn’t support your real intention)

Everybody has noticed that…(really???)

If I were you…(you’re not, but you can ask coaching questions to help them see)

Actionable:

When we provide feedback, we are ultimately seeking to influence the future behaviors and outcomes of the person we are providing the feedback to.

Therefore, the feedback needs to reinforce those behaviors/results that have met the expectations and seek to improve those that did not meet expectations. Avoid vague adjectives and ensure your feedback provides clear actionable outcomes for the recipient.

Be Specific and Non-Judgemental:

The feedback must be based on facts or observed behaviors. The feedback provider should keep it factual and objective and should avoid judgement-based words that are blame focused.

Timely:

Timely feedback is effective feedback. Feedback needs to be provided when there is still the opportunity to reflect upon the outcomes/behaviours and learn from them.

Real time coaching…

Feedback can be given at any time, it should not be limited to our monthly meetings or worse still, our annual performance discussions. Feedback provided weeks after an event is much less effective than feedback provided in a timely fashion.

Feedback to Leadership…aka Leading Up

What would be reasons leadership wouldn’t make a change?

What might be some reasons leadership doesn’t make the change you see?

· They don’t see it

· They’re stupid

· They’re lazy

· They haven’t found a solution that works

· It’s beyond their control

· They’ve tried but their leadership isn’t ready to change it yet

· To fix it would not produce a favorable return on investment

Presume the best

Presume is a verb that means to suppose, to take for granted, or to dare.

Assume is a verb that means to suppose, to take for granted, to take upon, to don, or to undertake.

In the shared meaning of “to suppose,” presume is usually used when you suppose based on probability, while assume is used when you suppose without any evidence.

Receiving feedback

Encourage Diversity of views

Actively Listen

Monitor Your Own Version…don’t believe your own version of the truth (see Rehoboam)

Know your triggers – Emotional Intelligence: Self-aware

Give the benefit that they want you to succeed

Leaders who value feedback

“We all need people who will give us feedback. That’s how we improve.” – Bill Gates

“I think it’s very important to have a feedback loop, where you’re constantly thinking about what you’ve done and how you could be doing it better.” – Elon Musk

Creating an Element Church Feedback loop

Feedback form

Name

Concisely Identify the Issue

Recommended Action