2021-5-2, The Christian Home: The Kitchen, Proverbs 24:3

Series Introduction

May is for Families

May is a major month for family- Mother’s Day, Graduations, The start of summer vacation.

During the month of May, I like to preach messages on the family.

What is a Home?

This month I would like to preach on a topic that I find inspiring and challenging- the Christian Home.

When I mention the home, I mean more than the building your family dwells in (single-family dwelling, apartment community). I think of it akin to the OT idea of “house.” I think of it more like your family kingdom or domain. It includes all that pertains to your family that you rule over:

How your family members relate to one another? What are your family rules? How does your family relate to the world outside your house? What is your household’s posture toward God in heaven?

When I talk about the Christian home, I’m referring to how your household goes about its daily business. I am also refering to matters of identity such as the family heritage and history which come into the house from your families of origin. I am also referring to the dreams and ambitions your family has for the future.

Home is an all-encompassing concept. It affects all of us everyday, even if you are a hermit in the Wichita Mountains. Home forms the core of who we are as individuals and homes collectively shape the character of nations. God cares a lot about the nature of our homes. In the Bible He usually deals with families in terms of their “house”.

The Christian Home

So now, take you as a believer. You are someone who treasures the Lord before all else. The Bible says that you are now part of God’s home.

John 1:12 ESV

But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God,

and...

John 14:2 ESV

In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?

God’s home has its own set of rules, privileges, relationships, and ways. Being a part of this home is of first importance and priority our lives.

Matthew 6:33 ESV

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

This raises the question: How should being a part of God’s House influence the shape and ways of our earthly homes?

How does your commitment to Christ show up in your home? Are there some qualities which should be found in our homes because we are Christ-followers?

Are there virtues which Christ expects to be a part of our homes- and that we should aspire toward.

Does the Bible give us instruction about our families?

The answer to each of these is an emphatic “Yes!” If He is Lord, then He is Lord of our homes.

This means that our homes are different in nature from those of people who do not call Christ “Lord.” Other families will follow the world and its ways, but we make the commitment that our homes will be Christian homes. In many ways, we are similar to Joshua. In Joshua 24, he challenged his fellow Israelites to decide for themselves whether their families would follow the gods of this world or if they would follow the Lord. Then Joshua declared, “But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15

Christian homes declare they belong to the Lord and strive to follow His ways in all they do.

And God makes it worth it if we align the rule of our homes with His rule of His.

Proverbs 24:3 ESV

By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established;

If we follow His wisdom, our homes will gain standing and endurance that will last for the generations.

Jesus echoes this proverb in His famous teaching in the Sermon on the Mount.

Matthew 7:24 ESV

“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock.

In this He says the difference between a house that thrives or one that falls apart under pressure is alignment between the way we run our houses and the way He runs His.

Emotional Appeal for them to Listen and Series approach

We all want good homes don’t we. We’ve witnessed broken homes. For many of us, our homes are exactly that, broken & dysfunctional. I’m guessing there’s not a person here who wouldn’t want a strong godly house. The good news is that you can and God will help. Your home’s turnaround can begin today and can be accomplished very quickly, even if the damage is immense. I hope this study helps you to repair and rebuild your home.

Even if your house is in decent shape, it can certainly get stronger so it can face whatever storms this life has in store for it. I hope some of the items in this study will fortify your house.

The benefit for aligning yor house was with the Lord’s house ways will go on beyond the four walls of your home.

1. Our family ways, these skills for living (wisdom), we bring into the world- into your community, workplace, government, and church.

2. they go into the future- they go into the homes of our children and then on into the homes of our grandchildren. Isn’t it neat to think that your decisions today about our home may live on into the next hundred years?

The woman who cut off the end of the pot roast before cooking. Her daughter asked her why she did that. She didn’t know. She did it because her mother did it. So she called up her mom and asked. The mom didn’t know either. She had done it because her mom had done it. So she called up her mother and asked. Great-grandma was shocked to hear that her daughter and grand daughter were cutting off the first quarter of their roasts. She explained that she only did that because her oven back in the day was too small to fit the entire roast, so she cut off the end. No one ever asked her why she did that until now and she never felt compelled to tell anyone why she did it.

What we do lives on...

In this series, I want to point out several ways that the Lord’s ways can become our family ways.

I want to do this by visiting different rooms in our houses (figuritively, of course). These rooms are metaphors for different aspects of family life. As we visit each room we will look at some of the Lord’s ways which you can consider to apply to that area of your families life. My hope is that as your add His ways into the mix, you will find your home bigger and stronger in Him.

The Kitchen

The kitchen is well-known to be the heart of the home. This is in part because everyone needs food and water and the kitchen is where these are kept.

The kitchen takes time to manage. Refrigerators and pantries become empty while sinks and dishwashers become full. Kitchen tables are difficult to keep clear and unless you have a dog, there is a lot of sweeping crumbs and bits out from under the table.

“If you can organize your kitchen you can organize your life.” Louis Parrish

But these things are all good things because they are signs of life. The kitchen is the common intersection where family members interact.

“Everything happens in the kitchen. Life happens in the kitchen.” Andrew Zimmern

It’s also one of the warmest rooms in the house because of the cooking, so in the winter it is a more comfortable space that people gather. This translates into the kitchen being a place of relational warmth.

“Happiness is a small house with a big kitchen.” Alfred Hitchcock

The kitchen is an excellent opportunity to remember God’s ways and adopt them into our families.

God’s Provision and Our Gratitude

The kitchen is our reminder of God’s daily provision for our families. It is a place to be grateful together.

There are a lot of things that we need in the kitchen. Food and drink. We have to acknowledge that God is ultimately the One who provides these things for us.

One story in the OT really accentuates this...

1 Kings 17:8–16 (ESV)

Then the word of the Lord came to him, “Arise, go to Zarephath, which belongs to Sidon, and dwell there. Behold, I have commanded a widow there to feed you.” So he arose and went to Zarephath. And when he came to the gate of the city, behold, a widow was there gathering sticks. And he called to her and said, “Bring me a little water in a vessel, that I may drink.” And as she was going to bring it, he called to her and said, “Bring me a morsel of bread in your hand.” And she said, “As the Lord your God lives, I have nothing baked, only a handful of flour in a jar and a little oil in a jug. And now I am gathering a couple of sticks that I may go in and prepare it for myself and my son, that we may eat it and die.” And Elijah said to her, “Do not fear; go and do as you have said. But first make me a little cake of it and bring it to me, and afterward make something for yourself and your son. For thus says the Lord, the God of Israel, ‘The jar of flour shall not be spent, and the jug of oil shall not be empty, until the day that the Lord sends rain upon the earth.’ ” And she went and did as Elijah said. And she and he and her household ate for many days. The jar of flour was not spent, neither did the jug of oil become empty, according to the word of the Lord that he spoke by Elijah.

God used the widow’s situation in the midst of famine and poverty to teach all of us that He is the One who provides. Through Elijah, He gave the widow the opportunity for faith. He responded to her faith with his mercy and provision. She was certainly grateful for His grace.

Our daily needs are an expression of God’s common grace. He provides sustenance for the righteous and the wicked alike. But it is still the Lord that provides it. Sustanance is not a given and is vulnerable (remember the toilet paper shortage of 2020? The issue with the tissue?). Yet, by His love, our families don’t often miss a meal. How do we know this will be the story tomorrow? We have faith. Therefore, we recognize God’s provision today and respond with thanksgiving. Jesus taught us to practice this gratitude daily

Matthew 6:11 ESV

Give us this day our daily bread,

So, as we spend time in the kitchen and see that our refrigerators and pantries are full, the faucet is running, that the roof has no holes in it, and that everyone has made it safely to the table, we pause and give thanks together.

Action- Make a habit of recognizing God’s regular gifts and uttering thanks for them together.

Gratitude board and praying before meals.

Breaking Bread

It has been said, “There is something profoundly satisfying about sharing a meal. Eating together, breaking bread together, is one of the oldest and most fundamentally unifying of human experiences.” -Barbara Coloroso

We all know the joy of sharing a meal with others. It is a major relationship practice in the Bible.

God received the worship of the Israelites through regular feasts.

The richest time between Jesus and His disciples was the last supper in the upper room.

Luke 22:15 ESV

And he said to them, “I have earnestly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer.

Then Jesus proceeded to teach them the most wonderful lessons about abiding in God and God abiding in them.

John 14:23 ESV

Jesus answered him, “If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.

and then Jesus prayed the most wonderful prayer for them.

As Christians, the nature of our relationship with Christ is described in terms of the intimacy of a shared meal.

Revelation 3:20 ESV

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.

In the early church, the Christians enjoyed one another before the Lord at the meal table.

Acts 2:46 ESV

And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts,

Today, we are commanded to meet at the Lord’s table during the Lord’s Supper to remember Calvary and hope for the day when we will share the Lord’s table with Christ again in heaven.

Given the importance of the meal table to the Creator, it makes sense that the table is important for families as well...

The kitchen is the first place of community for the family. The family meal is where we connect, grow, and love one another with words, time, and attention.

However, 40% of American families eat dinner together only three or fewer times a week, with 10 percent never eating dinner together at all.- https://www.conagrabrands.com/news-room/news-national-survey-reveals-nearly-half-of-american-families-eat-dinner-together-fewer-than-three-times-a-week-or-not-at-all-1008335

We lead busy lives and we don’t share meals with our families. Whether we know it or not, this means we have exchanging relational connection with our families for whatever is making us busy. There are a lot of good things- sports, careers, etc. Family is certainly more important than these.

1. Teamwork- The kitchen then is where we prepare food together.

2. Connection- It’s where we talk about our days. It is where we explore how God and faith intersect in our daily lives. It’s where we can process the day with the ones we love.

It’s where we express our interest in one another. The kitchen table is the place we listen and are heard.

3. Manners- It’s where we love one another by the use of manners- Emilie Barnes says that manners at the dinner table is one of the most basic expressions of the golden rule of Christ

Matthew 7:12 ESV

“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.

Saying thank you, respecting the space of others by asking for items to being passed, being considerate of others by sitting up and chewing with your mouth closed, valuing others by waiting for them before you eat.

The kitchen is where the family bears the burden of clean-up together. Many hands make a burden light.

Sharing meals is at the heart of family unity and love.

Action- Prioritize family dinner table meals. Make prep, the meal, and clean-up a family event

In a woodworking magazine, I came across a story of some kids who made their mother a beautiful wooden table for family dinner. The children named the table “Home By 5:30.” because the mom required family dinners and everyone had to be home...

One last thought on the kitchen and bring God’s ways into our family patterns.

Hospitality

Leaving an Empty Seat

The kitchen is the place to practice hospitality.

I’ve heard it described as being a master of the art of caring for strangers.

1. Honor- In other passages, we see how hospitality gives honor to unknown people.

Genesis 18:1–8 ESV

And the Lord appeared to him by the oaks of Mamre, as he sat at the door of his tent in the heat of the day. He lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, three men were standing in front of him. When he saw them, he ran from the tent door to meet them and bowed himself to the earth and said, “O Lord, if I have found favor in your sight, do not pass by your servant. Let a little water be brought, and wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree, while I bring a morsel of bread, that you may refresh yourselves, and after that you may pass on—since you have come to your servant.” So they said, “Do as you have said.” And Abraham went quickly into the tent to Sarah and said, “Quick! Three seahs of fine flour! Knead it, and make cakes.” And Abraham ran to the herd and took a calf, tender and good, and gave it to a young man, who prepared it quickly. Then he took curds and milk and the calf that he had prepared, and set it before them. And he stood by them under the tree while they ate.

2. Courtesy and establishing new relationship with others. It’s offering the warmth of the family dinner table to someone who is not family. So it sends an intense message of “welcome” to the family.

I received it from Kika and Anung. There is a need for hospitality among refugees.

3. In the ancient world, it was often a matter of life or death. If a person was not brought in for the night, then they may be killed by worthless people before the morning (think the story of Sodom and Gomorrah).

God loves hospitality, in part because strangers are a vulnerable population and God is very much for the strong caring for the vulnerable. He is for it also because it is about relationship and love. It is a gift of grace. It requires a servants heart. It’s costly in terms of time and money. It mirrors His treatment of us. There are still a lot of vulnerable people...

Senior adults, children with broken families, refugees who are in our country, new folks in the church

Funny thing, we don’t do a lot of this. Again, we are very busy. Sunday afternoon lunch used to be an easy time for it.

It is a great way to bring interesting and different people into you family. I remember growing up have people from different cultures at our table.

Action- leave the empty seat for someone to fill. Expectation of hospitality

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