Taboo Part 3

Guys Talk

What up- what up- what up

Tonight we are going to be talking about the harmful effects of porn and lust.

And how you can be free of that sin, we are going to discuss how sexual integrity plays a role in your battle against porn and lust.

First and foremost when I say porn, I want you to know what I am saying, so we all have a clear definition.

When I say porn I mean the visual consumption of video, photos, or messages where the intent is to get your sexual excited which leads to jerking off.

I am grouping porn and jerking off in the same camp, because let’s be real, you are not participating in porn for anything other than that.

Over the last three years, when we go to snowblast, up in Baraboo, WI, we have this conversation during the third message.

In our Taboo series guess what message this is?

Number 3.

And this year hits harder for me than in years past.

Why?

Because of who many times I saw the word porn or lust written down as sins to surrender to God.

Over the last year, all of you have been placed in your home with no way out.

Many of you are left at home all day while mom and dad go to work and you did or still do virtual learning.

You are lonely, suffering from boredom, deal with stress and depression.

In 2019 the porn industry earned 90 billion dollars worldwide.

To put that into context Hollywood make 10 billion dollars a year.

In the year 2020 the porn industry has seen a jump in users- they moved to 97 billion dollars of revenue.

But the kicker here, that number only comes from actually “legit” sites, and not your blackmarket sites, where kids are involved or even when rape is being explicitly shown, or even the involvement it has with human trafficking.

I think it would be closer to the 200 billion dollar industry if that was included.

As many of you know, I was addicted to porn from the time I was in 6th grade until year 5 of my marriage.

13 years of my life— I lived two lives.

If I could go back I would take it all back in a heart.

I would have never gone to my friends house, where we first looked at images together.

Images that were burned into my brain that kept me going back for more.

And when images were not enough, I watched the softcore stuff, but when that was boring I moved into more of the hardcore porn.

I began to treat women as objects.

I was way to nervous to talk to them in public, so I would just text them and be super flirty and clingy because I was longing for that attention but I never got it.

So I turned to the one thing that always left me happy, that always welcomed me with open arms, and would allow me to leave this world behind.

I kept turning to porn over and over again.

I would jerk off, mulitple times a time.

shower, bathroom, my room, computer room always when my parents were either not home, or sleeping, or they were upstairs just obvious as to what I was doing.

I would pretend to be sick, so I could stay home alone and have more time to watch porn.

I would miss time with my family because I was thinking about porn.

Like what should I try next.

I would sneak around, and spend hours watching video and filling my mind with this stuff.

It kept calling me back— and it always left me feeling empty.

As I would sneak back to my room— I would lay back down and feel worse about myself and it felt like I had no one I could talk too.

I try when I went to a camp, to ask about it, and the topic was brushed off and the other campers laughed about it.

They tried to find out who ask the question as it was anonymous, and so they could tease them, I told them it was probably this other kid.

And from that moment on, I made a promise to never talk about my issues with porn again.

Never—ever.

Because I felt like I was the only one who was dealing with this, in a room full of ten others laughing and joking about it— clearly there was something wrong with me.

And look, I don’t blame them, looking back, they probably all struggled with it and were too afraid to say anything thing— just like I was.

I don’t blame was counselors for telling me that it is a sin and that if you struggle with this it is wrong and point to the story of Obed, in the Bible.

Because most likely they also struggled with it.

I don’t blame my parents for just allowing me to have free range on the computer, never once setting up a blocker.

You see, I can only look at myself.

It is not the girls in high school, who were wearing less clothes that got me excited.

It was not the girls flirting with me that caused me to sin.

It was my own choice.

I decided to watch porn.

And I picked up on the bad views it placed on women.

Porn highlights women as an object for your sexual gratification.

Porn treats women as objects that we have sex with at our beaconing, it fills our minds with the idea that every woman wants you to cum on their bodies, and they love every second of it.

When you watch porn to watch a lie.

It is a script— all the organisms, the photoshops, the glam, the guys having huge dicks that never go limp— because they are shot up with all sorts of stuff to make them stay that way.

IT IS ALL I LIE TO YOU!

It hijacks your mind with the promise that this is what sex is and this is how you do it, and it is normal for you to watch this, and it is healthy for you to jerk-off.

LIE-LIE-LIE-LIE

Sometimes science has to catch up with where we are at in society.

We put cocaine in coke

We treated tooth aches with cocaine

cigarettes were said to sooth your throat.

cigarettes were not recommend from children under 6.

Science would learn that all of that was terrible.

And that is exactly what is happening today.

Science is showing that there is a glaring issue with people who are addicted to porn.

Oh sorry, I think I have mentioned porn as an addiction.

And I believe that many of you may have written me just with that word, addiction because no body want to admit they have an addiction.

Go a year without it.

Go a month?

Two weeks? we will be back in two weeks, tell me that you made it two weeks without watching porn.

A day, one day.

Can you?

The addicted quitter of cigarettes are the ones who promise you they could quit tomorrow, but never do.

If you can quit, then quit, do it tomorrow.

Because we are going to walk through some issues with porn and how it effects you.

Let’s start with our brain.

A man named Phineas Gage

Phineas was a man in the 1800, who was working on the railroad.

He was tasked to help clear giant stones out of the way of the railroad.

Do any one know how they did this?

Well they would drill into the stone a couple of feet then you would add gun powder, then you know the fuse to ignite the gunpowder, then they would add sand on top of the gun powder— and they would tamper it all down and then light it up and boom— the stone would blow up.

On this particular day, Phineas was doing the usual drilling a hole, and then he added the gun powder, but before the fuse or even the sand--- he got distracted by something and he missed those to step, but he thought he did them.

So he grabbed his iron rod and shoved it into the hole— and what happened was the iron and the stone caused a spark which sent that iron rod through Phineas’s face and out of of brain.

The iron bar came down about 30 feet away from him.

Yet he lived.

Here is a picture of him.

He would live another 12 years.

But everyone who knew Phineas would say that on the day of his accident, that the real Phineas died that day.

He was never the same again.

His whole personality changed.

And it never recovered.

Why do I tell you that story?

You brain is changing

actually it is always changing.

Mostly it changes how you think.

Your brain created super fast interstates.

It connects different paths to other paths.

What this looks like is when you get really good as playing guitar.

It is because your brain has been connecting the dot and has now built a path to make you better at playing guitar.

Or if you never have picked up a basketball and you start tomorrow, the path is not there yet, but the more you practice it, the more your brain connects the hands to the feet and the more your eye are connected to looking down court.

It is creating shortcuts to make you better.

Now does everyone become MJ- No.

But everyone could have the potential to be great at something, and it has a lot to do with your function of your brain.

So when you introduce porn in to the picture and you are creating habits to get aroused faster, to not be as stimulated as before, you get “good” as watching porn— I do not recommend getting good at watching porn.

So literally your brain is being wired to feed off of the porn.

You literally become super stimulated.

Another example of this is Nikolass Tinhurgen:

I want you to know today that you have a choice.