The Leader's Preparation Chapter 3

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Life shapes a leader

Home life

The relationship you have with your parents shapes the way you will lead. If you had both parents that were active in your life, most will have a sense of security and be able to lead with confidence. If you had an abusive parent then it may shape you to lead from a sense of fear. Where you fall in line with your siblings will shape how you lead. The first child will lead differently than the middle or youngest. If you are an only child, it will shape how you lead.
The family upbringing has a lot to do in shaping the leader you are today. A wise leader will recognize both the strength and weakness of their upbringing and accentuate the strengths and improve on the weaknesses. We must realize that although we had little control over how we were brought up, it affects how we will lead.
One of the greatest limitations for today’s spiritual leaders is their inability to understand and acknowledge how their past cripples their current effectiveness. They are blind to their emotional and spiritual need, so they do not seek the healing that is available to them in Christ. Instead, they press on, never really examining what lies behind their desire to be a leader. Some Christian leaders are motivated more by anger than by love. Others are so insecure they cannot tolerate disagreement from anyone. Still others, desperate for approval, lead by surrounding themselves with people who love and admire them. It is not only possible, but sadly common, for people to seek positions of spiritual authority as a means of personal edification rather than as an avenue to serve God and build his kingdom. This is a negative and destructive motivation; yet many leaders today are driven, far more than they realize, by the scars of their past.
Henry Blackaby and Richard Blackaby, Spiritual Leadership: Moving People on to God’s Agenda (Nashville, TN: B&H Publishing Group, 2001), 38.

Failures

The failures in a leaders life shape how strong they will be as a leader. The failure in and of itself is not what shapes your leadership, but how you respond to the failure. Some people for fear of failure do not take any risk. Others may take the risk and fail and give up. Still others will fail, learn from their failure and move ahead.

Perhaps it was Churchill’s numerous failures that led him to define success as “going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.

You only become a failure when you give up and allow yourself to be defeated. Sometimes failure is the best learning tool in life. I remember a football player who lost in the championship game who did not join his team in the locker room after the loss. He instead chose to stand in the end zone and watch the other team celebrate. When asked why he did this he told them he wanted to remember the pain of losing for not giving his all so that he would not make the same mistake again.

Crises

These are detrimental events that happen in a persons life that they have no control over. Crises can become your excuse or your motivation. For example, one may have a disability and be told that they cannot do what they aspire to do because of their limitation. When one believes this, they use it as an excuse for why they could not be what they aspire to be. However, there is most always a way to overcome your limitations to reach what you aspire to be. The choice belongs to the person.
I was told that because of my asthma that I could not participate in sports. However, I was able to play baseball and football as long as I managed my asthma.

Personal Struggles

Surprisingly, perhaps, many of history’s famous leaders experienced difficulty in public speaking as children. Winston Churchill, famous for his eloquence, had a speech impediment as a boy. Theodore Roosevelt spoke with difficulty. Mahatma Ghandi was so fearful of public speaking that in his first attempt to represent a client as her lawyer he became tongue-tied when it was time for him to speak in court. The embarrassed lawyer was forced to refund his fee and locate another lawyer for his client. D. L. Moody showed no early signs of developing into the forceful speaker he would become later in life. So poor was Moody’s grammar and so sparse his knowledge of the Bible that when he applied for membership in the Mount Vernon Congregational Church he was turned down upon his first application. When the young Moody attempted to speak in public during his church’s prayer meeting, he noted that it made adults “squirm their shoulders when I got up.” Some of the adults complained that Moody did not know enough grammar to address the congregation, and he was eventually asked to abstain from commenting in public.

It is intriguing that so many great leaders suffered severe romantic heartache as young people. Harry Truman was so painfully shy that it took him five years to muster the courage to speak his first words to his future wife. Because of his family’s misfortunes, it was not until Truman was thirty-five that he finally felt able to marry the girl of his dreams. Reading Truman’s correspondence to Bess during those years reveals a young man desperate to win the affection of a young lady for whom he felt completely unworthy. Lincoln was also woefully inept around women and suffered painful rejection before eventually marrying. Winston Churchill had the first woman he had ever truly cared for marry another man while two other women rejected his marriage proposal before he finally married Clementine at age thirty-seven. John Wesley, the famous English preacher, endured great frustration regarding a young woman while he was a missionary in America. As a result, he returned to England a brokenhearted, disillusioned, and unsuccessful missionary. Roger Williams, the first Baptist pastor in America, fell into severe depression when his low social status prevented him from marrying the young lady he loved. A young Billy Graham was devastated when Emily, the girl of his dreams, rejected his marriage proposal for another suitor who showed more promise of making something of himself. Graham remembered: “That woeful night in the spring of 1938 when she called it quits between us was Paradise Lost for me. In my despondency, I looked up Dr. Minder … I wept out my misery to his understanding ears.” Eleanor Roosevelt suffered the agonizing discovery that her husband Franklin was unfaithful. Historians have suggested that much of the energy and passion she later invested in social causes stemmed from an absence of fulfillment in her relationship with her husband. In each of these cases, it seems, early disappointment gave the aspiring leaders both a sense of humble reality and a renewed zeal to achieve something significant in their lives.

Personal struggles make us the people we are today.

Success through hardship

So many of history’s great leaders suffered major failures, crises, and disappointments in their development as leaders that these traumas almost seem prerequisite to leadership success. If any conclusion can be drawn from the biographies of great leaders, it is that none enjoyed easy paths to greatness. It could, in fact, be argued that, had they avoided hardship, greatness would also have eluded them. This painful process of leadership development may be seen in the lives of biblical leaders as well. Moses, arguably the greatest figure in the Old Testament, had a life filled with adversity and failure. As a newborn, his life was threatened, so his mother gave him away to a foreigner. Although Moses was raised among Egyptian royalty, he was regularly reminded that his ancestry was, in fact, slavery. His bungled attempt to rescue a fellow Hebrew meant he had to flee for his life into the desert. Moses spent forty years herding sheep in the wilderness for his father-in-law because of a mistake he made in his youth. He spent another forty years wandering in the wilderness because of a mistake made by those he was leading. He would ultimately die outside the land he had dreamed of entering because of a mistake he made while wandering in the wilderness. Yet, despite his significant failures, even secular historians recognize Moses as one of the most influential leaders of all time. The apostle Paul, perhaps the greatest figure in the New Testament after Christ, was a murderer, as was King David in the Old Testament. In fact, several of the most influential people mentioned in the Old and New Testaments were murderers.

God shapes spiritual leaders

Robert Clinton defines this in his book Making of a leader. He lists 6 stages of development God uses to shape leaders

Inner life growth

is the period in which people develop their character as well as their spiritual life. It is during this stage that people experience conversion. Once people have the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit, they are no longer subject to the whims of fate but are in a position where they can be systematically transformed into people who think and act like Christ. Leaders without the Holy Spirit are much more subject to their pasts than those whose characters are shaped by the Holy Spirit working within them. Thus, people without the Holy Spirit will often have major areas of their character that remain underdeveloped.
Henry Blackaby and Richard Blackaby, Spiritual Leadership: Moving People on to God’s Agenda (Nashville, TN: B&H Publishing Group, 2001), 44.

Ministry Maturing

phase people make their earliest attempts at spiritual leadership. They may volunteer to lead a church program, or they may venture to share their faith with someone. Through such experiences God teaches them more specifically what it means to be spiritual leaders. When people first attempt to exercise leadership, they often fail or experience great frustration. It is as they develop leadership skills, as well as a résumé of experiences, that people begin to understand their strengths and weakness. At this stage the focus is more on who leaders are rather than on what they do. What leaders learn from these early experiences will largely determine how they advance in leadership ability.

Life Maturing

period is when spiritual leaders begin to focus on their strengths and to find leadership opportunities in which they can be most effective. Whereas until this time, God was working primarily in the leader, now God begins to work increasingly through the leader. An experiential understanding of God matures at this time. Through significant life experiences God teaches people about life and relationships. It is through the normal experiences of failure and success, criticism and praise, loyalty and betrayal, illness and loss that God matures people. Again, much depends upon the leader’s reaction to the life circumstances through which God brings them. Positive responses to these circumstances will guide the person into a more mature level of leadership.

Convergence

phase, people’s ministry experiences and their life experiences converge into a specific job or responsibility wherein they draw on all they have learned in order to enjoy maximum effectiveness. This will be the job or role for which leaders are best known and in which they experience their greatest success.

Clinton’s focus is on the development of spiritual leaders, but the general principles can apply to secular leaders as well. Both can experience the merging of their life and work experiences into a leadership role that successfully integrates all they have learned with who they have become.

Unfortunately, many people never reach convergence. Some leaders never find jobs or challenges that bring to fruition all that has gone before in their lives. The full benefit of their past is never brought to bear on society’s needs. The Holy Spirit will work to pull together all the experiences in Christians’ lives in order to bring them to a deeper maturity. When leaders neglect the Holy Spirit’s role in their lives they never reach their full potential as spiritual leaders

Celebration

is a level of leadership Clinton says few people achieve. It comes after one has successfully led others for a significant period of time. For spiritual leaders this phase occurs after they have faithfully allowed God to accomplish his will for their lives as well as for their organizations. Successful spiritual leaders spend this final period of their lives celebrating and building upon the work God did in and through them. This is also a time for teaching the next generation. Leaders in this sixth phase have nothing to prove. Others respect them not because of their position of influence, or even because they are continuing to lead, but because of who they are and what they represent.

Abraham was a great leader

Abraham was a normal person God called to a supernatural calling.
God used Abrahams pagan family to shape him into the leader that would affect future generations.
Abraham experienced failure every time he altered God’s plan. He learned not to alter God’s plan later on in life.
Every time Abraham learned something from God he created an alter to remember. We need to create spiritual markers.
Abraham experienced God’s redemption. It is significant to note from biblical examples that God seldom intervened when people were about to make mistakes. Rather, he allowed them to fail, but stood ready to redeem them. Many individuals, through the process of failure and redemption, saw God’s character revealed in a deeper dimension than if God had simply stepped in to help them avoid failure. If there is anything leaders must carefully evaluate and process, it is their mistakes. By systematically reviewing mistakes and making the necessary adjustments to ensure that the same errors are not repeated, leaders can derive great benefit.
Henry Blackaby and Richard Blackaby, Spiritual Leadership: Moving People on to God’s Agenda (Nashville, TN: B&H Publishing Group, 2001), 49–50.
Abraham did not take shortcuts. His leadership took a lifetime.
Abraham demonstrated obedience by offering his son as a sacrifice.
Abraham became a friend of God. What was the result of God’s work in Abraham’s life over the years? He became a godly man; he became the patriarch of a nation; he became father of the faithful. But God’s activity in Abraham’s life helped him to become something even more important than all of these things. Abraham became a friend of God (2 Chron. 20:7; Isa. 41:8). It is one thing to call God your friend. It is quite another for God to call you his friend. Abraham is the only person to whom Scripture gives this distinction. “And the Scripture was fulfilled which says, ‘And Abraham believed God, and it was reckoned to him as righteousness,’ and he was called the friend of God” (James 2:23)
Henry Blackaby and Richard Blackaby, Spiritual Leadership: Moving People on to God’s Agenda (Nashville, TN: B&H Publishing Group, 2001), 53.
Spiritual Leadership: Moving People on to God’s Agenda Concepts and Scriptures for Consideration

CONCEPTS AND SCRIPTURES FOR CONSIDERATION

• The greatness of an organization will be directly proportional to the greatness of its leader.

• Ultimately, leadership is more about “being” than about “doing.”

• Any strategy for developing spiritual leaders must take into account those emerging leaders currently in their preteens.

• Most of history’s famous leaders have been decidedly ordinary people.

• So many of history’s great leaders suffered major failures, crises, and disappointments in their development as leaders that these traumas almost seem prerequisite to leadership success.

• God can use adversity to build certain qualities deep within one’s character that could not be fully developed in any other way.

• God seldom intervened when people were about to make mistakes. Rather, he allowed them to fail, but stood ready to redeem them.

• No experience, good or bad, is ever wasted.

• People may apply for various leadership positions, but God is the one who ultimately determines which leadership roles they will have.

• God’s assignments are always based on character—the greater the character, the greater the assignment.

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