The Pathway To Reconciliation
Notes
Transcript
Matthew 18:15-17
15 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.
16 But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses.
17 If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.
“15 Ἐὰν δὲ ἁμαρτήσῃ εἰς σὲ ὁ ἀδελφός σου, ὕπαγε ἔλεγξον αὐτὸν μεταξὺ σοῦ καὶ αὐτοῦ μόνου. ἐάν σου ἀκούσῃ, ἐκέρδησας τὸν ἀδελφόν σου·
16 ἐὰν δὲ μὴ ἀκούσῃ, παράλαβε μετὰ σοῦ ἔτι ἕνα ἢ δύο, ἵνα ἐπὶ στόματος δύο μαρτύρων ἢ τριῶν σταθῇ πᾶν ῥῆμα·
17 ἐὰν δὲ παρακούσῃ αὐτῶν, εἰπὸν τῇ ἐκκλησίᾳ· ἐὰν δὲ καὶ τῆς ἐκκλησίας παρακούσῃ, ἔστω σοι ὥσπερ ὁ ἐθνικὸς καὶ ὁ τελώνης.”
INTRODUCTION:
I- THE PROBLEM THAT MAKES RESTORATION NECESSARY (Matthew 18:15a)
I- THE PROBLEM THAT MAKES RESTORATION NECESSARY (Matthew 18:15a)
15 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.
A- Define the real problem:
A- Define the real problem:
1- There is a trespass that causes relationship problems.
a- The trespass causes disunity that:
(1) Disgraces the Father.
(2) Discourages the Faithful.
(3) Delights the Foe.
B- Discover the right perspective.
B- Discover the right perspective.
1- Consider your relationship with the offender.
a- As members of the same family.
(1 John 3:16)
16 We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters.
(Galatians 6:10)
10 Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.
b- As messengers of the Good News of Jesus to the lost.
(2 Corinthians 5:18-21)
18 And all of this is a gift from God, who brought us back to himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to him.
19 For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people’s sins against them. And he gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation.
20 So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, “Come back to God!”
21 For God made Christ, who never sinned, to be the offering for our sin, so that we could be made right with God through Christ.
2- Consider your responsibility to help the offender find the right path.
(Galatians 6:1)
1 Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.
3- Consider your attitude when attempting reconciliation.
(Galatians 6:1)
1 Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.
(Romans 2:1-3)
1 You may think you can condemn such people, but you are just as bad, and you have no excuse! When you say they are wicked and should be punished, you are condemning yourself, for you who judge others do these very same things.
2 And we know that God, in his justice, will punish anyone who does such things.
3 Since you judge others for doing these things, why do you think you can avoid God’s judgment when you do the same things?
Ask:
Have I been failing in the same areas?
(Hebrews 12:13)
13 Mark out a straight path for your feet so that those who are weak and lame will not fall but become strong.
Have I been praying for the offender?
(1 Samuel 12:23)
23 “As for me, I will certainly not sin against the Lord by ending my prayers for you. And I will continue to teach you what is good and right.
II- THE PROCEDURE THAT MAKES RECONCILIATION POSSIBLE (Matthew 18:15b-17)
II- THE PROCEDURE THAT MAKES RECONCILIATION POSSIBLE (Matthew 18:15b-17)
A- Visitation (Matthew 18:15b)
A- Visitation (Matthew 18:15b)
15 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.
1- Visit Privately- go to the offender to attempt reconciliation.
a- Don’t talk to others, but go to the offender.
Why?
Because it creates disunity in the family and others will judge without knowing the facts.
Because the whole thing might be a misunderstanding or a lack of knowing the facts.
(Proverbs 16:28)
28 A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the best of friends.
(Proverbs 25:9)
9 When arguing with your neighbor, don’t betray another person’s secret.
Might be wrong...
Like the mother of the little boy (Jimmy)
Told him to behave at the neighbor’s birthday party … if he did not he would get a whipping.
Sent him to the party
neighbor’s mother brought Jimmy home.
Jimmy’s mother proceeded to spank him. The asked what he did wrong.
Jimmy replied..”I didn’t do anything wrong. The party isn’t until tomorrow.
b- The real test of friendship & love is a willingness to confront wrongs and work through them.
(Proverbs 27:5-6)
5 An open rebuke is better than hidden love!
6 Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.
1- Human nature is to desire to make the offender come to us to seek forgiveness.
2- God’s way is for the offended to go to the offender.
God set the example for this. (Romans 5:8)
8 But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.
2- Visit lovingly - Do your best to avoid going in a spirit of anger or attempting to retaliate.
(Galatians 6:1)
1 Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.
3- Visit humbly - Never go in arrogance and pride.
Example of Joseph talking to his brothers:
(Genesis 45:1-8)
1 Joseph could stand it no longer. There were many people in the room, and he said to his attendants, “Out, all of you!” So he was alone with his brothers when he told them who he was.
2 Then he broke down and wept. He wept so loudly the Egyptians could hear him, and word of it quickly carried to Pharaoh’s palace.
3 “I am Joseph!” he said to his brothers. “Is my father still alive?” But his brothers were speechless! They were stunned to realize that Joseph was standing there in front of them.
4 “Please, come closer,” he said to them. So they came closer. And he said again, “I am Joseph, your brother, whom you sold into slavery in Egypt.
5 But don’t be upset, and don’t be angry with yourselves for selling me to this place. It was God who sent me here ahead of you to preserve your lives.
6 This famine that has ravaged the land for two years will last five more years, and there will be neither plowing nor harvesting.
7 God has sent me ahead of you to keep you and your families alive and to preserve many survivors.
8 So it was God who sent me here, not you! And he is the one who made me an adviser to Pharaoh—the manager of his entire palace and the governor of all Egypt.
Question:
What if the offender will not hear you out or refuses to reconcile?
B- Confirmation (Matthew 18:16)
B- Confirmation (Matthew 18:16)
16 But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses.
1- Take one or more godly, mature witnesses to attempt to confront the offender.
a- To act as witnesses to the conversation.
b- To attempt to help the offender to recognize the seriousness of the offence and promote reconciliation.
c- Remember: the goal is reconciliation and restoration of the offender.
What if the offender still refuses to reconcile?
C- Excommunication (Matthew 18:17)
C- Excommunication (Matthew 18:17)
17 If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.
1-If the person will not respond to to the private attempt, nor to the visit with godly witnesses, the case is to be taken to the church leaders and the church to attempt to resolve the problem.
2- If the offender continues to live in rebellion and pride, he or she is to be disfellowshipped from the church.
3- Disfellowshipping the offender is only be done as a last resort - and to be done in love.
4- The goal of such action is reclamation and restoration.
(2 Thessalonians 3:14-15)
14 Take note of those who refuse to obey what we say in this letter. Stay away from them so they will be ashamed.
15 Don’t think of them as enemies, but warn them as you would a brother or sister.
Examples:
The Corinthian man (1 Corinthians 5:5)
5 Then you must throw this man out and hand him over to Satan so that his sinful nature will be destroyed and he himself will be saved on the day the Lord returns.
Hymenaeus and Alexander (1 Timothy 1:19-20)
19 Cling to your faith in Christ, and keep your conscience clear. For some people have deliberately violated their consciences; as a result, their faith has been shipwrecked.
20 Hymenaeus and Alexander are two examples. I threw them out and handed them over to Satan so they might learn not to blaspheme God.
** This is not to be done as a witch hunt fo evil-doers!
Man who prayed to God about getting rid of all of the evil doers in the church.
God’s response - “Ok. I’ll start with you!”
The church is not a showcase for saints, hospital for sinners!
CONCLUSION: