Schoolyard: Hallways: The Dangers of Gossip as a Christian

If we want real Christian community, and for our gospel witness to make an impact, then we must get rid of our gossip.

What is gossip?

Why we should get rid of gossip.

How can we get rid of gossip?

What is gossip?

Gossip is a type of conversation that can take many different forms

Spilling secrets

When someone trusts you with a secret, that is not something sinful that needs to be dealt with through a parents or pastor, then you keep that secret. A breach in trust breaks apart relationships.

Telling lies/spreading rumors (slander)

Bearing false witness is clearly commanded not to be done in Scripture, all telling lies and spreading rumors does is bring about tension and strife within a group of people.

Before you spread a rumor or tell a lie about someone first ask, is this going to benefit anyone in our community? And the answer is always no.

Tearing someone down behind their back

God calls us to build up our brothers and sisters in Christ.

Romans 14:19

“Christian Concern”

This is something that plagues the Southern American Church. We will catch wind of something in someone else's life, maybe that they are struggling with a particular sin, and we will go to other people and tell them what is going on in the name of “Christian Concern” and for “Prayer”. In reality this is an attempt at sanctifying gossip. If we look at Matthew 18:15 these conversations should always first take place 1on1 with you and the original party. Not just in matters of calling out sin, but in any information you hear it should always be brought to the original party. If we truly have “Christian Concern” and are wanting to have people “Pray” for a struggling brother or sister then our concern should take us to them first!

Gossip is sinful

Proverbs 6:16, 19

God hates lies and gossip.

Why we should get rid of gossip.

Our gossip reflects our unbelief

Luke 6:43-45

Jesus speaks bluntly and clearly here, that, “out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45b

If we are continually speaking sinfully then our heart is full of sin. A heart that is full of sin is a heart that is full of unbelief. A heart that is full of unbelief is a heart that needs to repent!

Gossip destroys unity

Proverbs 16:28

This bit of wisdom literature is so short and simple that we must remember it. That our gossip spreads strife and tears apart friendships. How can we expect people outside the church to be attracted to what God is doing here if they only see strife and broken friendships?

Jesus makes it very clear in John 13:35, “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Gossip kills

James 3:1-12

“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words make me cry myself to sleep at night in a panic attack...” - Me in 8th grade

The words that we say always make it back to the person we’re speaking about. And these words hurt, just like James says, “the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.” James 3:6

“Be killing sin or it will be killing you.” - John Owen

Not only do we see that our gossip kills others it also kills ourselves. This sin of gossip, that is so easy to fall into, trust me, eats away at our heart until we are but a husk of a Christian. that is why we must kill our sin, or as Paul says, “For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.” Romans 8:13

How can we get rid of gossip?

Repent unto faith in Jesus

2 Corinthians 7:10-11

When we are confronted with our sin it should lead us to repentance. This is the story of the Corinthian church. In the letter of 1 Corinthians Paul calls the church out on their rampant sin, which causes them to repent. Now here in 2 Corinthians 7:10-11 we see that not only did their grief, or conviction, over sin lead them to repentance, their repentance lead them to living a new life.

Repentance of gossip is a three fold process

Confess you sin to God and ask for forgiveness - 1 John 1:9

Confess your sin to the offended party and ask for forgiveness - James 5:16

Stop gossiping - Ephesians 4:22-24

Ask for wisdom in your speech

James 3:13-18

It should be seen that immediately after James tells us what an uncontrolled tongue is capable of he teaches us about the wisdom that comes from God.

This is because the only way that we can truly control our tongue is through having God’s wisdom filling our speech.

James 1:5

How is it that we get the wisdom from God though?

By asking for it!

James 1:5 tells us that if we don’t have wisdom we just need to ask God for it and he will give it generously!

James 4:2b tells us that the reason we don’t have it is simply because we have not asked.

So, if you want to have your speech filled with the wisdom of God as to not tear people down with your speech, ask God for it.

Speak life

James 1:19

When we are wise with our speech, slow to speak, quick to hear, then we will learn that people around us, especially our brothers and sisters in Christ, need life and not death, they need blessings and not curses.

James 3:1-12

Wisdom literature often tells us what to do by showing us the effects of what not to do. So, we should not curse others and tear them down with our gossiping tongues. We should love and build up our brothers and sisters by speaking life.

Conclusion

When we begin to understand the weight of the gospel, that Jesus took the punishment of our slander and gossip on the cross and gave us grace and mercy instead of the punishment we deserved, that he gave us life when he should have given us death, then we should want to speak this life to others. So, let’s sing about this grace and new life together then go and speak this grace and life to each other.