God’s Word Does Not Leave Anyone Out #1

Introduction:

Today in our time together in the Word of God, brings us face to face with several matters related to marriage and marital status. In these 19 verses Paul deals with singles, widows, widowers, divorcees, and married people...that's just about everybody. So, if you felt left out last week as we looked at intimacy, there is something here for you.

As we come to chapter 7, I remember the story of the 45 year-old man who was marking his 25th anniversary. His wife found him crying. When she asked about his tears, he cried, ''Remember when your Daddy caught me stealing a kiss and said if I'd didn't marry you he'd see to it I went to jail for 25 years? ...well...I would have gotten out today!!!''

That little story is a reminder of a simple but profound truth. What's worse than being single and wanting to be married? Being married and wanting to be single. Maybe harder than that is being married, and watching your spouse die. And you wonder, should I marry again? Or perhaps, worst of all is being married, divorced, single again, and wondering if you should get remarried.

Since this text deals with marriage, divorce, and remarriage issues, I want to get something out of the way. Because I don't know ANY issue that brings a greater potential for condemnation.

Listen carefully, ''You can't change your past but Jesus can change your future.''

I. A Personal Decision Concerning Your Marriage Status

1 Corinthians 7:6-9

Whether you choose to stay single or marry, it is a personal decision you made by following God’s will and purpose for your life.

Paul gives some words of instruction to singles, particularly to those who are widows and widowers.

In verse 6, Paul is NOT saying that this is just his opinion. If you have something like that in the footnotes of your study Bible, get you a better Bible. Paul is simply acknowledging that this is not something Jesus spoke to directly. Down in verse 10 he quotes a direct command from Jesus.

He is NOT saying that ''this is my opinion, take it or leave it.'' He's simply saying, ''Jesus never addressed this but I am...and he does it under Divine inspiration.''

A. The power of a spiritual life

1 Corinthians 7:6–7 (AV)

But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.

By ''spiritual life'' I don't mean you sit around lighting candles, burning incense, and listening to Christian music. I mean a life that is LED by, GUIDED by, and EMPOWERED by the Holy Spirit.

If God has called you to be married, He can empower you.

Matthew 19:5 (AV)

And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?

Cleave means to join fast together; to glue together; to cement together; to be joined in the closest union possible; to be bound together; to be so totally united together that two become one. Therefore, to cleave means a spiritual union. It is a union higher and stronger than the union of parent and child. It is a union that means more than living together, more than having sex and bearing offspring. Animals do this. It is a union that can be wrought by God alone (v.11). It is a spiritual union that places man above the physical plane of animals. It is a spiritual fullness, a spiritual sharing of life together: a dedication, a consecration, a completeness, a satisfaction that makes a person the exclusive possession of God and of the spouse. As said, such a cleaving or spiritual union is wrought by God alone. Both husband and wife must be willing and submissive for God to bring about such a cleaving in their lives. “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear [trust] of God” Ephesians 5:21

If God has called you to be single, He can empower you.

There is only one exception for not marrying: God’s will. God calls some men and women to live a single and dedicated life for His service. But if God calls a person to live a life of dedication, He will give the person the power to control his passion. Again, if God has not called and given the power to control his passion, the believer is to marry.

A. The power of a spiritual life

B. The profit of a single life

1 Corinthians 7:8 (AV)

I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.

Scholars debate as to whether or not Paul was ever married. He is clearly NOT married at this point in his life.

Is it possible that Paul was married and his wife had died? We cannot be dogmatic because the Bible doesn't tell us about Paul's status. Galatians 1 says Paul was ''advancing in Judaism'' which by custom would have required marriage. There seems to be the sense in which the word ''unmarried'' is in reference to widowers.

Later on he will talk about the difficulties of persecution and the challenges of being married in the first century. But for the widow and widower there are challenges today in remarriage. And often those challenges are so great, it's just wisest to remain single.

The challenges of blended families

The sense from adult children that you're replacing mama

The distribution of property

The fact that you are ''set in your ways.''

If you have any money, the man will be accused of being a con-man and the woman will be called a gold-digger.

I personally think he has some older widows and widowers in mind and just says bluntly, ''There are some benefits to being remarried...but there are great benefits to remaining single.''

Top Ten Benefits of Being a Single Man:

1. You have the whole bed to yourself.

2. The deer head can finally be centerpiece of the living room.

3. Nobody will fuss if you leave the seat up.

4. You get where you're going on time.

5. You can leave the party when you want to.

6. You don't have to remember anniversaries anymore.

7. There are no more in-laws.

8. You save money on toilet paper.

9. You never have to watch Brad Pitt in a movie ever again.

10. You don't have to pretend you're listening to someone else while you're watching the Outdoor Channel.

Paul will elaborate later...but for now...you are not a second-class believer if you're single...and there is benefit in singleness.

A. The power for a spiritual life (6-7) B. The profit in a single life (8)

C. The priority of a sanctified life

1 Corinthians 7:9 (AV)

But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

Despite all the benefits of singleness, Paul knows there is a ''downside'' to singleness, too. The table of 6 looks awful empty with just one plate. The silence of an empty house can be really loud. You had all the covers but you really wanted someone with whom to share them.

But none of those are the ''downside'' Paul has in mind here. In the context of marital intimacy and physical desires, Paul says the downside is the temptation toward immorality.

If you have normal, healthy, physical desires, long-term dating relationships are not wise.

The most important thing is being right with God.

Often with younger couples they are ''waiting'' on the right time.

Waiting until we get out of college

Waiting until we get our careers started

Waiting until we pay off some debt

Waiting until...until...until

Paul says whether you are young or old, whether you're waiting on a college degree or your social security eligibility, make sure if you're gonna wait on marriage that you WAIT...on marriage!

And if you can't wait for a physical relationship, don't wait on marriage.

Getting married NOW may mess up your retirement.

Getting married NOW may mess up your finances.

Getting married NOW may postpone your Master's degree.

Getting married NOW may upset some of your family.

But the most important thing is being right with God.