Matthew 5:31-32

Previously

Jesus is Teaching His Listeners How to Have Greater Righteousness than the Scribes and Pharisees

Everything is Focused On the Heart, Not Just Outward Action

That is, He Focuses On the Intent/Heart/Spirit of the Old Law, Not Just the Letter of it

You Shall Not Murder = You Shall Not Even Remain Angry

You Shall Not Commit Adultery = You Shall Not Even Look at Someone with the Purpose of Lusting/Desiring After Them

Matthew 5:31-32

These 2 Verses are Going to Follow the Same Theme as the Others

Jesus is Going to Address What the Jewish People Had Come to Believe and Practice Concerning Divorce

Then He is Going to Teach Them God’s True Intention for Matters of Divorce

How the Law Concerning Divorce was Intended to Be Interpreted

There’s Absolutely No Way We are Going to Be Able to Look at All of the Little Nuances of MDR in the Bible

Smarter People Than Me Have Been Debating These Nuances for Thousands of Years

And They Still Can’t Agree on Everything

So We Need to Have an Open Mind When We Study the Topic

Maybe You Find Yourself in a Difficult Marriage or Divorce Situation

I’d Be Glad to Talk or Study With You Privately On That

Jesus Doesn’t Speak to All of the Nuances of the OT

His Focus is to Get Back to the Heart of What God Intended for Marriage

Matthew 5:31 (NASB)

“It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’;

Jesus is Quoting From Somewhere

He is Likely Referring to Deuteronomy 24:1-4

But You’ll Notice that His Quote Isn’t Actually Found in that Passage

I Believe He is Quoting How the Scribes and Pharisees Were Interpretting and Using this Passage

Deuteronomy 24:1–4 (NASB)

When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house,

and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another man’s wife,

and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife,

then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before YHWH, and you shall not bring sin on the land which YHWH your God gives you as an inheritance.

Jesus’ Quote Seems to Be Focused on the Divorce Certificate

But the Purpose of this Passage was Not Focused On the Divorce Certificate at All

This Passage was Teaching that the 1st Husband Could Not Remarry His Wife Whom He Divorced After Her Marriage with Her 2nd Husband Had Ended

This is a Difficult Passage With Its Own Set of Nuances and Assumptions that Must Be Made to Understand it

This Passage is a Very Specific Case

But the Jews Began Using it as a Passage of Authority to Divorce Their Wives

There Were 2 Main Schools of Thought in Jesus’ Day

There was the School of Shammai and the School of Hillel

They Were Both Highly Esteemed Pharisee Rabbis in Jesus’ Day

Shammai Took the More Conservative Stance While Hillel Took the More Liberal Stance on Divorce

Shammai Taught that “Some Indecency” (From Deuteronomy 24:1) Meant Sexually Immoral Acts

Hillel Taught that “Some Indecency” Included a Wide Range of Things

Even if She Burned the Food While Cooking

The 1st Century Jewish Historian, Josephus, Said that Divorces Were Permitted “For Any Causes Whatsoever”

An Uninspired Apocryphal Book, Ecclesiasticus (150 B.C.), Stated, “If she will not do as you tell her, get rid of her”

The Mishnah (Collection of Oral Traditions of Jewish Law) Stated All Kinds of Crazy Grounds for Divorce

If She was Barren

If She Had a Physical Defect

If She Had Poor Posture

If She Had Thinning Hair

If She Ate Something Her Husband Forbid Her to Eat

If Her Husband Found Someone that He Thought was Prettier

Essentially, to the Jewish Mind of Jesus’ Day, Divorce was Not a Big Deal

Many Jews Followed this More Liberal View of Divorce

This Lead to Divorce Being Very Common in Jesus’ Day and Culture

Sounds Just Like Our Culture, Doesn’t it?

People Flippantly Get Married and Divorced Today Just Like They Were Doing Back Then

Let’s Look at Divorce Certificates Real Quick

Divorce Had Obviously Become a Very Simple Procedure for a Jewish Man

Jewish Women Couldn’t Divorce Their Husbands

They Could Bring an Appeal to the Courts and Then the Judges Could Ask Her Husband to Divorce Her

But the Decision Ultimately Remained with the Husband

All He Had to Do was Write a Bill of Divorce in the Correct Form with Witnesses Present

It Had to Include Words that Expressly Permitted the Divorced Woman the Right to Remarry

It was a Voluntary Relinquishing of the Woman as His Wife

After the Certificate was Given to the Woman, She was Considered Free from that Marriage Covenant in Every Way and Free to Marry Whoever She Wished

This was the World Jesus Lived in

But Now We’re Going to See What Jesus Thought About This

Matthew 5:32 (NASB)

but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Jesus, Again, Raises the Bar

His Jewish Contemporaries Believed They Could Divorce Their Wives for Pretty Much Any Reason

As Long as a Divorce Certificate was Given the Divorce was Valid and Remarriages Could Occur

But Jesus Tells His Listeners That That Isn’t What God Intended

God Doesn’t Recognize a Divorce for Just Any Reason

The Only Divorce God Would Accept was When a Person’s Spouse Had Committed Unchastity/Sexual Immorality

Sexual Immorality = porneias = Fornication

A Husband Divorcing His Wife Under Any Other Circumstances was Making Her Commit Adultery

How So?

Because in that Culture, Women Only Had About 4 Realistic Options:

1.) Move Back in With Parents, if Possible

2.) Become a Prostitute

3.) Starve To Death

4.) Get Married

When a Man Divorced His Wife for Any Other Reason Than Fornication, He was Putting Her in a Very Difficult Situation

Many Times, a Situation of Life or Death

Being Divorced Doesn’t Make Someone an Adulterer

Jesus is Assuming the Typical Response of Jewish Women in this Situation

They Would Remarry

Jesus Says Her Husband Has Caused Her to Commit Adultery

No Loving, Humble, Merciful Follower of Jesus Would Ever Put Another Human Being in a Situation Like That

Also, the Man Who Chooses to Marry Her is an Adulterer

He Has Married a Woman Who is Still in a Marriage Covenant with Another Man

In Matthew 19, Jesus Goes into More Detail on How MDR Should Be Viewed By God’s People

Matthew 19:3–9 (NASB)

Some Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?”

This was Definitely a Popular View

It Might Have Been a Popular View Among These Pharisees

They are Testing Jesus By Trying to Drag Him into the Shammai vs. Hillel Debate

Maybe They Were Hoping He Would Choose One Side and Then They Would Attack Him with the Other

And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female,

and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

Jesus Didn’t Choose a Side

He Didn’t Go to Deuteronomy 24 to Make an Argument About When a Person Can Get a Divorce

He Went to Creation to Make a Different Point

His Point: People Shouldn’t Get Divorcd

The Scribes and Pharisees Were Only Concerned with Divorce

But Jesus Was Only Concerned with Marriage

They Were Only Concerned with the Ways Couples Could Be Torn Apart

Jesus Was Only Concerned with How Couples Should Stay Together

God Joins Man and Woman Together and Makes Them One

Man Should Not Separate What God Joins Together

How Arrogant and Irreverent it is When Humanity Rips Apart Something that God Joins Together

God Made Marriage to Last Forever

Divorce Was Never Meant to Exist

They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give her a certificate of divorce and send her away?”

Do You See the Problem With the Way the Jewish People Had Come to View Marriage?

They Looked at Divorce as a Command From the Law

In the Jewish Mind, if a Woman was to Cheat On Her Husband, the Husband Was Expected and Seemingly Required to Divorce Her

Jesus Never Commands or Requires Divorce, Nor Did the Law

But Jesus is About to Set Them Straight

He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.

Their Hardness of Heart was the Reason Moses Permitted/Allowed Divorce

Divorce was Never a Commandment Nor was it Required, But God Allowed it Because of Sin

But God Didn’t Create it to Be This Way

“And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

Jesus Gives Only One Exception to His “No Divorce” Teaching, Just as He Does in the Sermon on the Mount

Divorce is Only Lawful and Valid When Fornication Has Taken Place

Only in this Situation Does God Consider a Marriage Covenant Completely Annuled

The Only Difference is that Here the Man Who Does the Divorcing is Considered the Adulterer

In the Sermon on the Mount the Man is Said to Cause the Woman to Commit Adultery

Either Party that Marries Another Person After an Unqualified Divorce is Committing Adultery

When We Take Both of These Passages Together, We Find that the Common View of MDR of Jesus’ Day was Not Accepted By God

That Means the Common View of MDR of Our Day is Not Accepted By God

Divorce for Just Any Reason is Not Recognized By God

Jesus Teaches that the Only Exception is Divorce on the Grounds of Fornication

So What is a Person to Do Who Has Gone Through a Divorce for an Unlawful Reason?

The Jews and World of Jesus’ Day and the World of Our Day Would Say…

“Get Married! You are Free From Your Former Marriage!”

But Jesus Says that You Cannot Rightfully Marry Someone Else

So What Should that Person Do?

Paul Gives Us More Information in 1 Corinthians 7:10-11

1 Corinthians 7:10–11 (NASB)

But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband

(but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife.

There are 2 Options for the Unlawfully Divorced that God Honors:

1.) Remain Unmarried

2.) Be Reconciled

“So, If Reconciliation Isn’t Possible, God Just Expects Me to Be Single for the Rest of My Life?”

Many People Have Had that Exact Thought

I Sympathize With Those People

It’s a Horrible Situation

But It All Comes Down to This…

What is More Important to You, Having a Spouse or Being a Citizen of the Kingdom of Heaven?

If It’s Not the Kingdom, Then You Shouldn’t Worry About What God Expects of You

Because Jesus Says You Aren’t Worthy of His Kingdom if He Isn’t Your Top Priority

Reconciliation Isn’t Always Possible, But I Believe it is Obvious Which Choice God Prefers

Israel is Described as an Adulterous Wife on Many Occasions in the OT

But Even Though She was an Adultress, God Never Divorced Her Forever

He Always Sought Reconciliation

His Love for Humanity Was On Full Display in the Death of Jesus

Ephesians 5 Describes the Church as Jesus’ Bride

We Will Never Be the Perfect Bride, Yet He Will Never Leave Us Nor Forsake Us

Some of Us Have/Will Even Rebel Against Him and Become Unfaithful

But He is Always Willing to Forgive and Be Reconciled Whenever We Return to Him

People of Jesus’ Kingdom are to Be Peacemakers/Reconcilers (Beatitudes)

That Would Include Reconciling in a Marriage Covenant

If We are Always Looking for Lawful Ways to Divorce…

Then We are Thinking Like the Pharisees, Not Like Jesus

Jesus Wants Us to See Marriage as a Sacred and Holy Covenant

No Covenant Should Be Entered Before Counting the Cost of Whether We Can Faithfully Keep it or Not

That Includes Choosing to Follow Jesus as a Christian and in Getting Married

And When You View Marriage as a Sacred and Holy Covenant, Divorce is Never an Option

I Know Many People Who are the Innocent Party in Unlawful Divorces

I Think There are Things Worth Discussing in Those Situations

And if That Describes You, I’d Love to Talk to You Privately About Your Situation

Summary

Divorce Should Never Be Considered an Option By God’s People

The Only Time God Allows Divorce to Be an Option is When Your Spouse Has Committed Adultery

Whenever an Unlawful Divorce Has Occured, God Desires Reconciliation, if at All Possible

God Can and Will Forgive the Sin of Unlawful Divorce

But He Will Not Forgive the Sin of Active Adultery

Our Righteousness Exceeds the Righteousness of the Scribes and Pharisees Whenever…

We See Marriage the Way God Sees Marriage

Whenever We Keep Our Covenant With Our Spouses

Or Reconcile Whenever Possible

Marriage is to Be an Image of the Relationship and Covenant Between Jesus and His Kingdom People

Becoming a Christian is Choosing a Life of Selflessness

Marriage is a Covenant of Selflessness

Those Who Choose to Enter it Must Be Dedicated to Selflessness

Whenever Christians Choose Christ-Centered Selflessness…

Christiansity is a Beauty-Filled, Joy-Filled, Peace-Filled Life

Whenever Spouses Choose Selflessness…

Marriage is a Beauty-Filled, Joy-Filled, Peace-Filled Life as Well