Humility Before Others

Prayer

Struggle to Humble Ourselves Before Others

I gotta tell ya, I’m excited about Capernaum, and what’s happening as we move into our missional focus to lead youth and young adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities and their families into the abundant life of Jesus.

I had conversations this week with Brad Mowry, Eastern Division Coordinator for Young Life (he’s the one who’ll be coming to lead the Introductory Gathering on Monday, August 30), and Jessica Longenette, who was the Capernaum leader for Putnam County when we started it in 2019.

They provided lots of valuable insight and wisdom on leading Capernaum - and great encouragement (Jessica was particularly excited - I think she was lamenting the fact that Covid has seemingly killed it for good).

But having those conversations was also a sobering reminder - that engaging in Capernaum is going to be a struggle, there are parts of it that are going to be hard.

Working with anyone with special needs is a challenge - need to be attentive. To go at a much slower pace. To be comfortable with being uncomfortable - with silence. With not knowing what to say. With challenges of communication.

Here’s where this really hits us - because in doing so, we have to give up our natural desire to do things at our normal speed of operation, or to talk about the things we want to talk about. Or to be comfortable.

Last Saturday, when I went to go visit Shepard Memorial Church, there was a gentleman, Glen, who’d grown up in the church and had just retired from serving as a pastor at a church in San Francisco (quite cultural change - Appalachia to San Francisco).

He had his adult son with him, Noah, who is special needs. Glen was very interesting fellow, loves history. So easy to just engage entirely with Glen and end up ignoring Noah. I found myself having to make a concerted effort to engage Noah, just to meet him, acknowledge his presence.

It’s not that I don’t think that these young men and women are important, worthwhile - it’s the tendency to see myself, my stuff, what I think I have to get done, conversations I like to engage in, my agenda, as more important. And so we may neglect them.

Often what hinders us in serving others - as much as we love the idea of service, serving others - genuinely serving them - requires us to submit to them, to their needs, their desires, their pace, their interests, where they’re at.

There was a study done at Princeton Seminary in 1970’s. These two behavioral scientists were asking the question, why do people do good things for others? At root of their question was whether the good things we do are more dispositional or situational?

In other words, are we driven by internal motivations, our disposition, attitude, mindset…or are we driven more by the situation, external factors…which has the bigger influence?

Set up of the study was this - students were to meet researcher in a particular building and fill out a survey. Questions had to do with what motivated them in their faith - statements like “I am motivated to do good in world (intrinsic)” or “I really want to get into heaven (extrinsic)” (bad theology here).

Then the students were told to prepare a brief talk on…ready for this? - the Good Samaritan (remember the story?). They were given instructions to then walk to another building on campus and meet another researcher there and give their talk on the story of the Good Samaritan.

Then they were randomly told one of three things: One, that they had plenty of time to make their way over, no rush…or two, they were on-time, but to head on over so they wouldn’t be late…or three, that they were already running late and so they needed to hurry.

Here’s the catch - on their way over, the route they had to take because of the layout of the campus, they had to go through a narrow alleyway, about four feet. There was a plant there, a man who was on the ground pretending to be sick and in need of help. Because the alleyway was so narrow, you had to virtually step over the guy to get by!

Here’s what study revealed. Disposition didn’t matter nearly as much. As much as people said they were motivated internally to do good, the primary deciding factor was actually situational, external - time constraint: 63% of those who were told they had plenty of time stopped to help the man, 45% of those who were “on-time” stopped to help, and only 10% of those who were late did.

Overall, only 40% of seminary students who had been thinking about the parable of the Good Samaritan while they were making their way over to the next researcher stopped to help this man in need.

Biggest influence was how rushed they felt. I have to do this. I don’t have time for this person. My agenda is more important here.

This begs question: How can we begin to see a transformation of our disposition, of internal motivation, so that we would naturally be willing to stop and help others? Willing to do good, to serve others?

Main point this morning - we need to nurture virtue of humility because it is disposition of humility that will enable us to serve others, all others. See how we can nurture the mind and heart of humility

The Same Mindset of Jesus

Long-running comic strip called Zits, centers on a young high school student named Jeremy. In this one particular comic, the panels show Jeremy and his mom in a car, she’s driving, and in each panel, Jeremy is a different age, progressively getting older.

But in the last panel, they are in the house and the mom is asking Jeremy if he would take her to run a quick errand. Jeremy can’t believe that his mother would ask so much of him! Seems he’s forgotten the many hours she’s spent over the years carting him around to different place.

It’s a sign of maturation, when we begin to realize how much we received from our parents, how much they gave of themselves for us as we were growing up (usually when we become parents ourselves and realize how much constant work it is!).

This is the essence of Paul’s exhortation in Philippians 2:1-8. Let’s take a look at what Paul writes in his letter to the Philippians.

He gives us a list of four conditions - if you’ve received encouragement from being united with Jesus, if you’ve been comforted by his love, if you’ve experienced the gift of the Holy Spirit, his tenderness and compassion, then act in this way.

Important to understand that the word “if” used here implies certainty. It could be translated as “since.” In other words, since you’ve received all these wonderful gifts from Jesus, since he’s encouraged you, loved you, comforted you, shown you compassion and mercy, given you his Spirit...

Since he’s done all these things for you, be like him. Think same way. Have that same love, that same heart for others.

What exactly is mindset of Jesus? How did he think?

It certainly wasn’t out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, empty glory. He wasn’t looking out for number one.

Jesus had mindset of humility. Jesus, in humility valued others above yourself. Jesus, in humility, does not consume himself with his own interests, but looks toward others, their interests, what concerns them.

This really is an amazing thought to consider…Jesus values us above himself. That’s how much you and I matter to Jesus. That’s way he thinks. Jesus is more concerned with you, your interests, what’s happening with you, than he is with himself, his interests.

In case you doubt that’s true (that can’t be right!), Paul quotes what is commonly known as the “Christ hymn”, as example par excellence of mindset of Jesus, and how he engages us in relationship.

Christ hymn begins with a description of Jesus’ incarnation (incarnation is name we give Jesus become incarnated, taking on flesh, becoming human), specifically, the humility he displayed in becoming human, his willingness to let go of his divine power and glory, emptying himself - some translations use phrase, made himself nothing - to come be with us, to dwell among us, as one of us.

But I want you to notice something huge here, the way it describes Jesus’ self-emptying…it says he did it by taking the very nature of a servant, being found in human likeness.

It’s amazing, if you think about it. It doesn’t say he took on nature of human, in form of a servant. It’s reverse. The focus is on Jesus taking on nature of servant as he took on our humanity. It’s this servant identity, that’s his whole mindset.

And it’s not just in his incarnation, the Christ hymn goes on describe Jesus’ humility displayed in his crucifixion. “He humbled himself, becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross.”

We’re reminded that Jesus’ humble mindset, his valuing us above himself, looking to our interests, led him to be obedient to death - but not a glorious death in battle, or easy, natural in your sleep at the end of a long-life death…but a shameful death, a criminals’s death, an excruciatingly painful death (in fact, our word excruciating comes from crucifixion, that’s how terribly painful crucifixion was).

This is very definition of humility.

Remember, pride is vice opposite to virtue of humility - pride is all about self. Competition. I want to be better than. I find my significance by being smarter than you. More attractive. Younger. More popular. More successful. A better, more moral person. My wants and desires are more important.

Humility says, no. I value you more. Your concerns are more important. You should be honored above me.

Isn’t it incredible to think that this is mindset of Jesus? There’s no other way that begins to explain why he would empty himself of glory, power, stooping to become human, taking on servant identity, laying down his life for us. Utter humility is the only rational explanation.

If you saw newsletter I sent out this Thursday, it included a video from I Am Second, story of Michael & Ivey Ketterer (amazing story - didn’t think they were ready for kids, God kept calling them to take on foster kids, ended up with five).

Michael, the dad, goes on America’s Got Talent a couple of years ago to sing “To Love Somebody”. But Michael said this: “Even if you’re completely disabled and broken, you’re still my son. I believe that’s really who our Father is. He’s not afraid to get down in the dirt with us. As a matter of fact, he sent his Son to be just like us.”

God getting down in the dirt with us. That’s humility.

Here’s thing. It’s for all of us. This offering, this self sacrifice, isn’t just for the deserving people, all the good folks. It’s for everyone. The ungrateful. The friend who betrayed. The leaders who opposed him at every turn and abused the justice system to get him killed. Jesus gets down in the dirt with the dirtiest of us.

He considered all of them - all of us - above himself. This is mindset Paul is exhorting us to have. This willingness to humble ourselves before others - before all others.

It’s important to keep in mind that when we’re talking about humility here, idea of humility is not that we would think less of ourselves, but rather that we would think of ourselves less.

Romans 12:3 - Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought (don’t let that pride get you), but rather think of yourself with sober judgment...

It’s not about false modesty (we should recognize and acknowledge gifts God’s given us!). It’s about shifting our mindset from a self orientation to an others orientation.

And that only happens as we experience the goodness of Jesus and it spurs in us the desire to be like him. To have same mindset. This is Paul’s whole point here.

Is to be served by Jesus. To open yourself to know his comfort and love. Every Sunday, when we have our time of repentance. Every time we celebrate Communion. In our daily times of prayer and quiet and reflecting on Scripture...

And then, to be like-minded. I’m going to consider others above myself, I’m going to humble myself before others, before all others, just like Jesus did.

This is what Jesus is teaching us in this passage. This is why virtue of humility, nurturing it in our lives is so essential. Because we can not be for others, if we’re not willing to humble ourselves before them. Our pride will get in the way every time.

So, let me challenge you to engage in some exercises this week so that you can put Jesus’ teachings into practice, so that we will be not just hearers of the Word, but doers.

First thought is this, to make this a regular “flash” prayer: I humble myself before ____________. As you’re out and about, see other people - quick judgment comes into your mind…I humble myself before them, Lord. When someone starts to wear on your patience…I humble myself before them.

I promise you, from personal experience, there will be no shortage of opportunity to do this.

When it comes to some people, this will be fairly easy to do. It will be really hard, very humbling (which is exactly the point) when it comes to others (people you don’t like, or someone you’ve just had a disagreement with).

Discipline is to nurture within us same mindset of Jesus, willingness to value others above ourselves.

Here’s another discipline - engage in service this week. Do something for someone else - but if it is at all possible, do it in secret. Be a secret service agent this week. No recognition, no glory, no gratitude. Just out of love for others.

It may not be possible to do this in secret, but look for opportunities to serve others. To look to their interests.

Require the humility to pay attention to them (that’s how we look to their interests). We quiet ourselves before them. Listen.

So, that’s the second challenge I want to offer you.

Finally, let me offer this thought to you, why this willingness to humble ourselves before others, before all others is so essential. The willingness to humble ourselves before others is at the very heart of the Kingdom of God.

We see it at center of the relationship between the Father and the Son

John 17:1…After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed: “Father, the hour has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you.

Reason Jesus wants Father to glorify him is so that Son may glorify Father.

Beautiful back and forth love and desire to serve the other.

Again, John 17:10, part of the same prayer: All I have is yours, and all you have is mine.

Same thing…Father, it’s all yours. Whatever I have. I offer it freely because I know and trust that you do the same for me.

Do you see it? It’s this amazingly beautiful willingness for the Father and Son to humble themselves before the other. To consider the interests of the other before their own, the Father toward the Son. The Son toward Father.

This is what Jesus is inviting us into. This is how the Kingdom of God works. Pride has no place here, because everyone is seeking to serve the other.

This is whole basis for all of our relationships. As Paul teaches in Ephesians 5:21, Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. In other words, because you so love and honor Jesus, humble yourself before each other. He goes on to describe in Ephesians 5 how this play out in all of our relationships...

In marriages…Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord…in the same way, Husbands, humble yourselves before your wives by loving them sacrificially, in the same way that Jesus loved the church and gave himself up for her.

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Fathers (and mothers), do not exasperate your children, instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Goes on with the same dynamic between slaves and masters. We could apply that to relationships between employees and bosses.

There’s an old parable that demonstrates the difference between being self-serving and other serving, it was first told as a description of the difference between heaven and hell. Between the Kingdom of God and kingdom of the world. It’s the parable of the long spoons - short video

(Image of heaven and hell, both filled with long tables, amazing amounts of delicious foods, a feast! Everyone seated, ready to dig in. But there’s one caveat - you must use long utensils to eat.

Everyone in hell stays hungry because they can’t hold the utensil and get the food into their mouths. They are too long!

But those in heaven are willing to humble themselves and serve the other. And as each serves the other, everyone gets to enjoy the wonderful meal.)

I hope you’re capturing the vision of the Kingdom, beauty and wisdom of Jesus. Strength in his humility. Why life works best for all of us when we embrace the heart and mind of Jesus. When we are like-minded. When, like Jesus, we humble ourselves before others. Before all others.