Setting a Strong Foundation

I have yet to come across someone who sets out in life to be a failure. Someone who says, “I want to constantly be stressed out, manage my resources poorly, and I want to be disrespected by my community.” Nobody says or thinks that, but unfortunately, many of us end up like that. Good people, with good intentions get lost in debt, lose the respect of the people around them because of some decisions they have made, or live in constant stress. In the US, 73% of people regularly experience psychological symptoms caused by stress. 73%!!! And if we are honest, most of us that are here in the room or watching this service online would say that we too are often, if not always stressed out. Many of us may confess to managing our resources poorly, whether they be our health, our time or our money. And some of you, because of the choices you have made, no longer have respect in your community.

But I have good news for you today. You can trade your stress for peace. You can learn to manage your time, your energy, and your money so that that instead of trying to survive, you actually thrive. You can earn back the respect of your friends and families. Instead of being a fool, you can learn to fool-proof your life. And the answer to how do we do this is found in the book of Proverbs.

One of the things that I love about the Bible, is that it holistic. It speaks to every part of our lives - the spiritual, the physical, the emotional because we are holistic beings and the spiritual, physical and emotional parts of us are intertwined together like Apple headphones with any other cable in your bag.

The book of proverbs, which is in what we often call the Old Testament or the First testament is a book that was written to instruct people on the value of wisdom and living wisely.

Proverbs 1:1–3 NLT

These are the proverbs of Solomon, David’s son, king of Israel. Their purpose is to teach people wisdom and discipline, to help them understand the insights of the wise. Their purpose is to teach people to live disciplined and successful lives, to help them do what is right, just, and fair.

Many of the proverbs in it are attributed to King Solomon, who was considered to be the wisest man in the Bible (outside of Jesus, of course). The irony is that although he started well, Solomon himself stopped living out these proverbs and he made some foolish mistakes that had long-lasting repercussions for both him personally, and the nation of Israel. And isn’t that true for us, many times as well - we start off strong and full of good intentions, and then, somewhere along the way, we compromise just a little too much - a little too often - and soon, we have a life that is not marked by wisdom, but by foolishness.

What’s sneaky about foolishness is that it is an internal character flaw. You can even look successful to others around you but you know, internally, that not everything that glitters is gold.

I am convinced that in the long term, A SUCCESSFUL LIFE IS MEASURED BY CHARACTER, NOT CAPITAL - that you will experience a more-fulfilled, satisfied life if you focus on growing your character instead of focussing on accumulating things. If life is like a building, then your character is the foundation.

This is a picture of the Burj Khalifa in Dubai, the tallest building in the world. It is 2717ft. tall. But in order for them to build it that tall, they had to create a foundation that utilizes more than 45,000 cubic meter of concrete weighing over 110,000 tonnes and has 192 piles that are buried more than 164ft deep.

The deeper and stronger your foundation, the more successful your life will be. Pastor and author Carey Nieuwhof wrote in a blog post that “competency starts something that only character can finish.” So much of our lives is about what we can do, that we neglect who we are. We grow skills, but don’t grow our character but it doesn’t matter how skilled you are, one slip up in character could undermine it all. A SUCCESSFUL LIFE IS MEASURED BY CHARACTER, NOT CAPITAL.

So what are three ways we can protect and grow our character - that we can set a strong foundation for our lives? The first thing we need to do, when we are confronted with a choice, is to CONSIDER GOD FIRST

1. Consider God FIRST

What I mean by that is, we need to take into account the will of God in all our choices. Many of us, even those of us who profess that Jesus is our King and we follow Jesus, often fail to consider what God might say about each decision.

Proverbs 1:7 NLT

Fear of the Lord is the foundation of true knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.

Most of us are afraid of something and that fear informs our actions and our reactions. I don’t mean mean fear of bees, or sharks or those evil, blood-sucking bugs from hell, mosquitos, but I mean emotional fears. Some people fear not having enough - so they gather and hoard all they can. Some people fear other people’s opinions of them, so they change to be like whomever they are with. Some people fear missing out on stuff, so they pack life full of experiences, with little to no thought to saving for the future. Most of us are driven by some kind of fear.

For me, it’s the fear of disappointing people and getting in trouble. I am afraid of that email that says, “We need to talk.” I hate the feeling of unresolved conflict. It causes me to lose sleep, to over-react to things in my mind, to occupy my every thought until it’s all settled and even then, I replay it in my mind over and over again, looking for ways that I messed up.

But the only fear that should drive us is the fear of the Lord. To fear God is to regard God with reverent awe. He alone is holy, awesome, and glorious. Speaking of the angelic seraphim, in Isaiah’s vision he says,

Isaiah 6:3 NLT

They were calling out to each other, “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of Heaven’s Armies! The whole earth is filled with his glory!”

God is worthy of our respect because of who he is. Some people, in their audacity, sit in judgment of God. They don’t fear him, they think that they know better than he does. They are like Captain America judging Stan Lee, the creator of the character for the life that was written for him. It’s ridiculous. We don’t judge God, he judges us.

2 Corinthians 5:10 NLT

For we must all stand before Christ to be judged. We will each receive whatever we deserve for the good or evil we have done in this earthly body.

Because God is a righteous judge, we should be concerned about the consequences of displeasing him. We should have a healthy fear of the Lord - not a fear that leaves us cowering and terrified but rather a fear like the respect a child should have towards his or her parents. Our fear of the Lord is built on a loving relationship with him. So to fear God is to know God and to know God is to have life

Proverbs 19:23 NIV

The fear of the Lord leads to life; then one rests content, untouched by trouble.

When you fear God, you no longer need to fear men. You begin to see that

Proverbs 29:25 NIV

Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.

When we fear God, it shapes our character. If we go through our days with a desire to please God by considering what God wants us to do in each decision, by expressing the fruit of the Spirit to others, to telling and showing people how loved they are by our omnipotent and loving God, then we are walking in the fear of the Lord and the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge. What kind of knowledge do we gain from fearing God? The knowledge of God himself. It’s a relational knowledge, like when the old Bible translations says that Adam KNEW Eve, it meant intimacy and the kind of knowledge that only comes through marriage. I can say confidently that no human knows my wife, Abby, like I do and no one knows me like she does. And I can say that no human has shaped my character more. I have seen the depth of my sin and immaturity and have grown as a person because of our relationship. There is a depth of relational knowledge that is born of almost 20 years of marriage. When we walk in the fear of the Lord, we will know God intimately - like husbands and wives know each other - and that will shape our character more than anything else. And when our character is shaped according to God’s word, it will lead to a more successful life because A SUCCESSFUL LIFE IS MEASURED BY CHARACTER, NOT CAPITAL.

The second thing you can do to grow your character and set a stronger foundation for your life is to BE WISE ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS.

2. Be wise about your friends

I’m not sure what your friends are like, or were like, but when I was in high school, I had a pretty tight knit group of friends. We were “good kids.” We weren’t religious, we didn’t really help people, but we also didn’t cause too much trouble. Mostly, we sat in coffee shops and played cards. Occasionally, we would go out and do dumb things, like trying to get my friends old car to get air off this ramp at a high school, or go out driving til 3AM. They were (and still are) good people, although since coming to faith and moving away from BC, I have, regretfully, lost relationship with most of them, I still cherish those memories of our friendship.

But not everyone is as lucky as I was to find a good group of friends. Once, I was talking a girl, whose locker wasn’t far from mine, in the hallway at lunch. She wanted to skip the afternoon classes and invited me to go with her. I thought about it for a second, but my fear at getting in trouble with my teachers and parents was too much and so I declined. Later that week, that girl was arrested and the police searched her locker and found a 9mm handgun.

Who your friends are is important. Who you spend time with will shape your character, for both good or bad. If your friends are people who do good, you will often do good with them. But if they are people who do evil, it becomes easy to join them.

In chapter 1 of Proverbs, the author warns us to be careful of who our friends are.

Proverbs 1:10–19 NLT

My child, if sinners entice you, turn your back on them! They may say, “Come and join us. Let’s hide and kill someone! Just for fun, let’s ambush the innocent! Let’s swallow them alive, like the grave; let’s swallow them whole, like those who go down to the pit of death. Think of the great things we’ll get! We’ll fill our houses with all the stuff we take. Come, throw in your lot with us; we’ll all share the loot.” My child, don’t go along with them! Stay far away from their paths. They rush to commit evil deeds. They hurry to commit murder. If a bird sees a trap being set, it knows to stay away. But these people set an ambush for themselves; they are trying to get themselves killed. Such is the fate of all who are greedy for money; it robs them of life.

Being a wise person means surrounding yourself with people who make you a better person. In the analogy in this passage, the friends are trying to entice the main character to pursue wealth at any cost, even robbery and murder. But A SUCCESSFUL LIFE IS MEASURED BY CHARACTER, NOT CAPITAL and our character is shaped by who our friends are.

Proverbs 18:24 NIV

One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

How are your friends? Do you have friends who make you a better person, or do you have friends that are unwise for you to be around? Or maybe you have isolated yourself and you don’t have any friends. That’s not the way to go either because we need friends in our life to challenge us and help us.

Proverbs 27:17 NLT

As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.

May you find some friends that sharpen you and help you be a better person.

Setting a strong foundation and growing in our character requires us to consider God in everything, and it requires us to be wise about our friends. It also requires that we BE HUMBLE.

3. Be humble

In the book of proverbs, especially in chapter 1, wisdom is personified and given a feminine pronoun.

Proverbs 1:20 NLT

Wisdom shouts in the streets. She cries out in the public square.

And she is crying for people to turn to her - for people to turn from foolishness and embrace her. She says,

Proverbs 1:23 NIV

Repent at my rebuke! Then I will pour out my thoughts to you, I will make known to you my teachings.

Repentance is recognizing that you were wrong and making the decision to make a change. It therefore requires humility. A person of good character humbly examines his or her actions and motivations to see if he or she is living wisely. They don’t just react to whims and fancies - they actually think about what they are doing and why and then they choose what is best.

When we aren’t humble - when we refuse to listen to wisdom - whether its the wisdom from our elders who have gone through more life than we have, or the wisdom that comes from God through the Bible or through the Holy Spirit - we experience the consequences for our arrogance.

Proverbs 1:30–33 NIV

Since they would not accept my advice and spurned my rebuke, they will eat the fruit of their ways and be filled with the fruit of their schemes. For the waywardness of the simple will kill them, and the complacency of fools will destroy them; but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm.”

A humble attitude in life will actually help protect you from self-made calamity. I don’t remember all the details, but I do remember asking a senior lady from one of the churches that I served “when it comes to parenting, what is one thing you would do differently if you could do it all over again?” She thought for a second and she answered, “I clean the house less and play with the kids more.” I have never forgot that. I like a clean house - I find it more relaxing than if it’s messy because if it’s messy, I am constantly reminded of what needs to be done. But I have learned, from listening to that wise woman, that it’s often better to leave the mess til later - or leave work until later - and just be present to the family - whether we are watching Golden Girls or playing a game. I have known people who’s work is more important to them than time with the family and I have seen what kind of emotional and relational impact that leaves on a family. I am not the wisest person and I have many of my own self-made calamities, but in this one thing, I had the wisdom to learn from this wise woman and the result has been a deep relationship with my family where we can actually talk about stuff.

To grow in your character, you must have the humility to listen to others and seek wisdom in how you work. Refusing to listen to others is pride and

Proverbs 11:2 NIV

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

People who are relationally and spiritually successful are humble people because A SUCCESSFUL LIFE IS MEASURED BY CHARACTER, NOT CAPITAL.

Conclusion

Setting a strong foundation of good character will help “fool-proof” your life - it will help prevent foolishness from wreaking havok in your heart, family and community. It will result in less stress, healthier relationships, and the freedom to be generous with your resources.

But having a good character means nothing if you don’t first know Jesus. Jesus is God and he was crucified in order to wipe away your sins and bring you into intimate relationship with God. Jesus said that he was the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through him. To have a healthy “fear of the Lord” - to walk in intimacy with God - requires us to surrender our lives to the Lordship of Jesus.

And my hope is that if you have been exploring faith and what Jesus means to you, that today, you hear the deep and abiding truth that although you have made mistakes, that although you have been unwise, that although you have sinned before God, He loves you with a deep and abiding love that is so strong that he sent Jesus to be a sacrifice in order to redeem you and wipe away all your sins. He invites you, here and now, to come home to him and to surrender your life to Jesus. And if today is the day that you want to put your faith in Jesus, then I want to encourage you to do two things. First, simply talk to God - tell him what’s on your heart and tell him that you are surrendering your life to him today. If you do that, then know that according to the Bible,

1 John 1:9 NIV

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

And if you have done that today, welcome to the family!! Second, send us an email. There is so much more to this faith journey and we want to walk alongside you in it. We want to know you and we want to give you some resources on how to live out your faith. So email MADISON ECKERT, OUR SITE PASTOR FOR NORTH PARK HURON AT [e-mail] and let’s start this faith journey together.

Today, I challenged you with three things in order to set a strong foundation in your life: to consider God first, to be wise about your friends and to be humble. Most people live their lives pursuing capital - whether it is financial capital to buy what they want, or relational capital to get their way. But if you will pursue wisdom as a way of life and focus on growing your character, you will experience a more successful life because A SUCCESSFUL LIFE IS MEASURED BY CHARACTER, NOT CAPITAL.

Pray.