Make Your Mouth A Means Of Grace

Introduction

The topic that’s been assigned to me for this afternoon is the topic of gossip. Now, I’m going to expand that out a bit because really what’s before us is, as the apostle Paul would say, “a striving for unity.” And here’s why that’s the case. We know that language, the way we communicate with one another either has the power to build up and encourage or the power to tear down and destroy.

My wife, Amy and I have been married just over 17 years now. Very early on in our marriage, if I remember right, it was during the first couple of months, we were having a disagreement, an argument over something, I can’t remember what it was about. Isn’t it interesting how in relationships, you very rarely remember what you were fighting about, but you can remember the stupid mistakes you made during the fight?

Well, I made a very stupid mistake during that argument. Obviously, I was losing the argument and so I threw out a hail Mary shot, and I said, “you’re just like your dad!” Now, I don’t why I said that, I love her dad, he’s a great guy, we have a great relationship, but there was something in me that knew that would bug her and throw her off her game.

The look she gave me after I said that I think caused me to immediately cower and say, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you’re right, I’m wrong.” And it was also a mental note to me, don’t ever say something like that again.

Words have power.

Someone once said,

“The tongue has no bones but is strong enough to break the heart.”

That’s true for sure. All of us in here today could probably share stories of hurt and pain in our past by the hands of hurtful words.

So, here’s what I want to do this afternoon. I want to tackle this topic from a theological/gospel-centered perspective, not a moralistic perspective. And what I mean by that, and I hope even this can be an encouragement to you all in how you teach the Bible to your students: I want to give you Jesus, not a bunch of rules or moral lessons.

What I desire in you, in myself and in these students, that were charged with educating and leading and shepherding are transformed or changed hearts through the power of the gospel which results in good works.

One of my favorite Christmas movies is, “A Christmas Story.” It airs every year for 24 hours on Christmas Eve through Christmas day. But there’s a scene in the movie where Ralphie, the main character gets in trouble with his parents for saying a bad word.

And so, his parents look at him with shock in their faces after he said the bad word and the very next scene you see is Ralphie in the bathroom with a bar of soap in his mouth.

The imagery of that discipline is, “you said a dirty word and so we’re going to wash your mouth out.”

It’s a funny scene for sure, but sadly, that’s really how a lot of Christians go about handling moral issues in their lives and in the lives of others. We see the outward sin and try to treat it with moralistic principles or self-centered righteousness, just be better, try harder. We’ll look at Bible characters and say, just be like David, or be like Joseph, or be like Peter or Paul rather than pressing deeper into the gospel and saying, what I need is Jesus. What needs changed, what needs cleaned is the heart.

It’s exactly why Jesus, when addressing the issue of our speech said,

Matthew 12:29, “For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”

So, let’s take a moment here this afternoon to remind ourselves of the gospel and the work of God in redeeming and restoring us.

Go to Psalm 40.

For the past three summers, we here at Calvary have studied and preached through the Psalms and so it’s just been where I’ve been camping out and living for the past three months and have just fallen in love with the Psalms.

I want to just look at the first three verses to remind us of and encourage us of the new life, and the new song our God has given us and put in our mouth.

In verse 1 David says,

Psalm 40:1, I waited patiently for the LORD, and he turned to me and heard my cry for help.

In verse 1 we see,

God’s mercy.

Charles Spurgeon once said,

“God’s mercy is so great that you may sooner drain the sea of its water, or deprive the sun of its light, or make space to narrow, than diminish the great mercy of God.”

When we take time to contemplate the depravity of our hearts, the sinfulness that lies close within, the reality that we have spit in the face of our God as we have chased after other false idols, false lovers and that God has not destroyed us, it’s pretty astounding is it not?

I have two kids that I love very much. And there have been many times when they have just flat out disrespected me and I about lose my mind. And you know why? Because of my pride. “How dare you disrespect me.” I’m not excusing their sin, but so often I counter it not with grace and mercy and love to see them grow in grace, but I counter their sin with my own sin.

If we as parents can lose our tempers and set out to destroy when we’ve been wronged can then recognize that our God, who has been wronged infinitely more, not by two children, but by every human being that has ever existed and yet has not just snapped and ripped the universe in half but instead has been merciful and gracious, how does that not cause joy, gratitude and praise to spring up in our hearts.

We sang it this morning, “My sin, Oh the bliss of this glorious thought, my sin, not in part, but the whole is nailed to the cross and I bear it no more”…what’s the response? “Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord, Oh my soul!”

Look at verse 2 now.

Psalm 40:2, He brought me up from a desolate pit, out of the muddy clay, and set my feet on a rock, making my steps secure.

It’s here that we see

God’s rescue.

This past week a story was circulating online of NBA player Andre Drummond who jumped into a pool to save his two-year-old son who had fallen in. Now, everyone was okay thankfully, but you can watch the video of the child falling headfirst into the water and then immediately afterward his dad jumping in with everything he had on to lift his child up out of the water and safely onto the ground.

And that’s what we see in this verse. It’s ultimately pointing to Christ who jumped into the pit to lift us out and safely place us on solid ground because that’s ultimately what our souls long for. Meaning, purpose, life, joy.

(My testimony).

And here’s the result now of God’s mercy, of God’s rescue, here’s where see in response to a changed and transformed heart.

Verse 3,

Psalm 40:3, He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and they will trust in the LORD.

It’s here that we sing,

God’s song.

The result of a new heart that is in love with Jesus is a new song that we sing.

What’s the song that the world sings right now? What’s the song we hear non-stop? I’ll tell you what I’m hearing. It’s the song of complaining, of ridicule, of criticism, of sniping, of slander, of hatred, of racism and divide. It’s a song of screaming and yelling and anger. It’s a song of unhappiness and worry and fear. It’s a song of confusion and perversion. It’s a song of lust and vulgarity.

Isn’t that the song culture is singing?

And what’s God done in our hearts, the psalmist says? He’s put a new song in our mouths. A new song that when sung, causes others to turn their heads and ask, can you teach me that song? Where’d you learn that? That sounds different.

Isn’t that exactly what the church should be? That counter-cultural movement that sings a different song that is beautiful and intoxicating, leaving people wanting more. A song of God’s mercy, a song of God’s rescue, a song of God’s grace, a song of God’s love, a song of God’s joy that fills us.

And so, what happens when we begin to sing the song of the world, the song of our culture, we muddy up and corrupt God’s beautiful song. And no longer are we an inviting and intoxicating and loving counter-culture, but we’re just like everything else in a drab and dreary world that desperately needs that splash of color and life to draw people’s eyes to.

And so, here is the teaching, the encouragement, the charge to us from God’s Word so that we might guard against singing the wrong song but instead continue to sing the song of God’s grace, of God’s rescue, of God’s mercy.

Turn to the book of Ephesians, chapter 4.

Verse 29 says,

Ephesians 4:29, Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

The word “Corrupting” could also be translated as “rotten.”

And so, the charge to us as Christ-followers is to guard our mouths, to guard every single word that comes out of it, to ensure that nothing rotten is spoken. And here’s why this matters.

Let me give you three quick implications of rotten language.

1. Rottenness does not nourish.

What if at lunch today, all Jason’s Deli served us was rotten food that they dug out of their restaurant dumpster several days ago, technically it’s still food, but I think all of us would be having a pretty rough afternoon and evening and maybe the next several days.

You see rotten words, corrupting words, which Scripture addresses as a number of things (gossip, slander, complaining, grumbling, lying, etc…), are technically words but they have no nourishing impact within them whatsoever.

Do you know someone who’s just constantly complaining, constantly critical of something or someone? Let me ask you, do you typically want to be around them for any length of time? I don’t, why? Because it’s not nourishing to my heart and my soul.

Rottenness does not nourish.

2. Rottenness smells bad and makes the environment unpleasant.

Have you ever left food in your trash for too long?

I grew up with my grandma living with us, which was awesome. Absolutely loved it. But she used to make the most awful smelling meals I’ve ever smelled in my life. I mean, the food wasn’t even rotten yet and it would just reek like nothing else, let alone after it had sat in the trash for a while.

I had to get out of the house whenever she cooked because I couldn’t handle the smell.

Paul’s trying to drive this point home in Ephesians. Rottenness, corrupting talk drives people away.

3. Rottenness probably comes from a diseased tree.

This is what Jesus meant when he said, “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”

So, as I wrap up here, let me give us a radical way of thinking about how we speak to one another.

Look at Ephesians 4:29 again.

Ephesians 4:29, Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Corrupting talk, like I said a moment ago can be several things:

Gossip – bearing bad news behind someone’s back out of a bad heart.

Slander – saying something untrue about someone else that results, intentionally or unintentionally, in damaging that someone else’s reputation.

Grumbling/complaining – ultimately displaying that we don’t believe God is good, sovereign, faithful, just, or wise.

Trevin Wax recently said that one of the greatest dangers on the horizon for the Christian and the mission of God is a grumbling, complaining heart.

Why? Because grumbling and complaining, gossip and slander do not bring life. They’re rotten. They bring division, destruction, hopelessness. What brings life? Joy. Love. Humility. Peace. Grace.

Isn’t that what Paul says? Every word, you hear that. Every word that comes out of our mouths should build up the hearer and bring grace.

I titled this talk, “Make your mouth a means of grace.”

Meaning, are your words building others up or tearing others down? Are they drawing people to the goodness and hope of Christ? Are people built up, encouraged, and strengthened after you speak or are they angered, confused, depressed, or discouraged?

Love needs to drive this. Love for God. Love for people.

And love for God and love for people maybe means we have to have hard or uncomfortable conversations with people but done in a spirit of humility and peace. We need to help one another in this.

I know my heart. It’s prone to wander. Making my mouth a means of grace is not my default setting. It’s grace-driven work, grace-driven effort. And I need brothers and sisters in my life helping me pursue Christ in this realm. We all need one another. We’re a team here. We’re in this together.

Will this year be difficult? Will this year be challenging? Will students and parents push us? Yeah, you better believe it. And so, in those moments of temptation to grumble or complain, dive first into the gospel. God’s mercy, rescue, his new song.

Remember your mission. Grumblers and complainers, gossipers and slanderers are those who have forgotten their mission: to make disciples.

Lastly, love one another. Love one another enough to call out sin when you see it in their lives and love one another enough to be grateful when others call it out in you. This is how we grow in grace.

Do you want to see this school thrive and flourish like you’ve never seen before? Do you want to find joy in your mission here? I firmly believe with all my heart, that it begins right here with a commitment by God’s grace and Holy Spirit power to want to build one another up.

Love you all. Let’s get to work.