Dei-Edwards Wedding

Procession

“Please stand in honor of the Bride” as maize settles

Ask those attending to be seated after Eli settles

Greetings

It is a privilege to stand here today

Family and friends are present

It’s been a journey and labor to come to this point

Good news all the planning is done

From this point on you can just enjoy - soak it up

Take a breathe

take a look at those here today if you’d like

Most importantly take a look at each other, we’ve come to celebrate this

Address Family and friends you too have a role here, today is a day to celebrate (Do the same as above)

Today we take a moment in time and pause, celebrate but also reflect upon the meaning of these two joining together in marriage today.

The Love Story

For some this may not be a story you know of, for others it is a reminder, for Precia and Jared, my hope is that this would be a reminder of what brings you here today

Jared and Precia met at a Casino, perhaps not knowing the jackpot they had found that night.

They both enjoyed frequenting a local bar at that point in time and began to grow closer

At some point Precia brought home Jared to meet the family, Precia’s dad quickly made him part of the family

It was after this that Precia began to realize that Jared struggled with his dependency with alcohol and it had become a problem in his life.

What that journey looked like is unclear to me at this point but what is clear is Jared came to a realization that if he didn’t get clean, he would no longer have Precia

Let me pause and say two things: This is an immensely difficult thing to do. Anyone who knows anyone with an addiction knows this is no easy task. It requires a reckoning of the soul and power that requires something greater than oneself. I love that in this case as in many that power was love.

I also want to pause and say what divine providence that Jared met Precia of all people. If anyone knew the power that faith and supporting someone you love can do in the process of them achieving sobriety, Precia had seen the fruit of it. Her dad himself being an addict who celebrated several years of sobriety and freedom through Jesus and Debbie.

All that to be said, through perseverance and commitment, and support from Precia through detox and treatment, including taking him to outpatient treatment. Jared got clean and turned his life around. Jared is almost 5 years sober.

The support though was mutual. Precia herself has had a journey seeking companionship and love. She had insecurities of being “good enough” to be loved. She longed for someone to that she could be herself with completely

She worded it as “weirdo silly self”, which honestly anyone who knows Precia knows that side of her is one of the absolute greatest privileges of knowing. Even so Jared affirmed that she was worth loving and I can say has definitely matched that weirdness and silliness himself. Best of all he has shown Precia something we all knew and I bet Precia has reciprocated this. Those things that made her insecure are worth loving and beautiful in their own right.

Not only this but Jared has loved her kids and they love him.

In the passing of David (Precia’s father), Jared stood by her side and helped “pick up broken pieces”

Reflection

In all truth, I love this story as it already portrays a great deal about the beauty of love and the commitment secured in marriage and the fruit that comes from that. Many see marriage in a romantic light, painted in beautiful colors of rosy hues. It has moments like this that of course help sustain it and I think more moments can become that in time as you grow in unity and relational intimacy. That being said, marriage is actually in many ways a refining process. Like crude metals put into a furnace that is put through such extreme heat so as to separate the impurities in the source material from the beautiful metal pure material that the world values for its beauty. So too is marriage. You are, though lovely now as individuals, through marriage put through seasons of hardship and you’ll be tested to do what is good for yourself versus what is good for you spouse, to lay down your own needs in order to lift up your spouse to a better place. You both have already walked through huge trials as a couple and from it you’ve been able to recognize the beauty of enduring love and this has taught you to value one another. With this resonates a truth about marriage, it is about being willing to give at times believing in faith that your spouse thrive from those actions and reciprocate that in return. This is why in the Christian world we love to recite what love is, patient, kind, not envious, not boastful, not stubborn or irritable, not rejoicing in wrong but in truth, it bears, hopes, believes, endures all things. It is the heart of God for you made evident, in this context your spouse, to say I have faith there are better days to come and this hardship will pass and the hope of what is to come is worth it.

John 15:13 ESV

13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.

Jesus modeled this, he laid down his life for all those who would come to believe in him, that we now call the Church which throughout the Bible is called his bride (for a reason that I will get to). But the point I’m trying to make is this. It’s not about the trial and the sacrifice though beautiful in their own way. Marriage instead is about the love that drives that, the commitment to the process to say, better days will come and in the process we will grow closer and more intimate in the journey if we keep our eyes on the hope found in the process. The beautiful reward that is found in one another. A lasting love that echos throughout time and is foreshadowed in marriage that says I see you, I don’t want you to hide from me but to be fully known, there is freedom to be you uniquely, and let me join you in this life of hardship and aid you to be the person who can fully experience life in joy and peace. Love is hopeful and sees the ultimate goodness to be found in the end, marriage is a vehicle to arriving at that love that only comes through commitment and sacrifice.

Marriage

In this way marriage is called a sacrament in the Christian World view. Meaning it is a gracious symbol, something here on earth that points to the reality of heaven above. A poetic image from God built into life that is meant to point us to him, to better understand his love and heart for all peoples. Therefore fundamentally, the only way to understand marriage in its original design is to know the love of God and continually be connected to that love. It is both the end goal and example, the verse above is found in a context of remaining and abiding in God and so too therefore marriage finds its fullest expression within the context of those who know Jesus and walk with him.

Vows

(Ask them to turn to one another)

At this point, therefore. I ask you this. A non-traditional question before we proceed. Jared will you lay down your life for Precia? Precia will you lay down your life for Jared?

In that case, in good standing, I will ask you to repeat these words as a (what the bible calls covenant) promise and unwavering commitment to one another.

I, Jared Sean Dei/Precia Rei Edwards, take you, Precia Rae Edwards/Jared Sean Dei,

From this day forward

as my lawfully wedded wife

I commit

to have and to hold

you and only you

from this day forward,

for better or for worse

for richer or for poorer

in sickness and in health

I will love you

and I will cherish you

all the days of my life

I pledge and promise this

to you

before God and those we love

Exchange Rings

Rings for a myriad of reasons are used in weddings. They are costly and an indicator to others of the commitment you have to one another. They are also a reminder of marriage to those that wear them as they clink on things and have weight. Even though it becomes a part of you; you will find your self subconsciously and consciously accommodating it and protecting it. Further, as I said, costly metals and diamonds go through a repeated process of immense heat and pressure that purges out many impurities, in this they are a symbol of the process and the fruit that comes from patience in the process. Further they are a unique expression of your spouse’s love for you.

(Ask Jared/Precia to Hold them and admire them for a moment)

When your ready please place the ring in your hand on the tip of Precia/Jared’s left ring finger.

As you put it on repeat after me:

With this ring I am wed to you, I give it to you as a symbol of my faithfulness and enduring love for you

Blanket Ceremony

Ask the mother of the groom and the mother of the bride to come with the unity blanket

Explain that is is a symbol of unity often done in Native American tradition. In order to honor Jared’s ancestry and culture, Jared and Precia have decided as their first act as a married couple to include this ceremony after their vows.

It is also a symbol/outward representation of a spiritual reality. In this ceremony a blanket is wrapped around the the bride and groom, in this case their whole family with Eli and Maize included. The covering represents their unity and oneness as a family, a kind expression that they are now no longer separate but together.

I invite you in this moment to lift your hands toward them, perhaps offer a prayer of blessing in quiet.

Prayer

Kiss

check in with couple and congregation, almost there

Ok the moment we all were waiting for, no wedding is complete without this.

You may now kiss the bride.

Present/Announce

Direct the to face toward the congregation

It is my joy and privilege to present to you for the first time, Mr. and Mrs (Misses). Dei!

Announcement after recession

At this time we will have a 30 minute or so intermission/happy hour

For those who are able and willing, the bride and groom ask that those capable help move the benches to the left around the table.

There will be drinks and hors doeuvres’ available that you are welcome to help yourselves to

Please also visit the guest book to sign and snap some polaroids for the Dei’s, you will see a desk to the right to do so.

Lastly, there will be croquet to the left in the field.