The Local Church & the Matter of Marriage
Our Blueprint for a New Testament Church • Sermon • Submitted
0 ratings
· 18 viewsNotes
Transcript
Introduction
Introduction
Our text this morning is 1 Corinthians 7:1-5. We are continuing to preach through the book of 1 Corinthians. Our goal is to learn from it how to be the local church that God wants us to be. As I have said repeatedly, 1 Corinthians is our blueprint.
Over the past year, the Holy Spirit has warned us about having divisions in the local church. A church should be united, not be divided. Our focus must be centered squarely on Christ and the mission that He gave us to accomplish. We are to concentrate on sharing the message of the cross within our community as well as the world.
Next, we admonished by the Holy Spirit to maintain discipline within the local church. All matters of immorality must be dealt with swiftly and decisively. Remember we are to...
Purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may be a new lump, as ye are unleavened. For even Christ our passover is sacrificed for us:
When it comes to matters of a material nature (i.e. a believer suing a fellow believer), we are to handle within our midst.
If then ye have judgments of things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least esteemed in the church.
We ended chapter 6 with a command to...
Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
There was also this reminder...
What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.
When we come to the next seven chapters, the Holy Spirit teaches us how to deal with a myriad of difficulties within each local church. As you will see, some of these difficulties are things we must deal with on a personal level individually. However, there are some other difficulties concerning our public worship in which a church must handle God’s way.
Now, here is good place to remember something vitally important about each local church. The thing we must remember is that the each local church belongs to Christ and is the house of God. You see it was Christ Himself that ordained the local church. And, it is through the local church that God has commissioned to carry the glorious gospel of Christ to the world in this present age. The local church is extremely important to God. Here are couple of verses that prove my point.
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Here is another great verse.
But if I tarry long, that thou mayest know how thou oughtest to behave thyself in the house of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and ground of the truth.
Each local church is comprised of truly, born-again believers who are determined to live their lives pleasing the Lord and serving Him. That is a true, New Testament local church. It is not about the buildings or the property even though we are blessed to have both. The local church is about people. In fact, the local church is really all about family. We who are members of this church are brothers and sisters in Christ.
Now, I say all that to say this. People have problems. It is a fact of life. All of us here this morning as members or attendees deal with our fleshly body and its issues. Consequently, local churches are going to have problems.
If you are here visiting this morning and you are looking for the perfect local church, let me know when you find it. I want to visit it myself. However, I believe you are never going to find the perfect local church. I willingly admit that our church is not perfect. We have our issues. However, there is one thing we do not have an issue with and that is teaching/preaching the Word of God. If you want a good local church (not a perfect one), then look for a church that teaches and preaches God’s Word. I can assure you that is what we do here.
Now, as I was saying, churches struggle with issues because they are comprised of people who are struggling with issues. That is why we are doing this series of messages in 1 Corinthians. We are determined that we are going to do the best we can at being the local church that God wants and not what the world expects. Thus, we need to know what God says about the difficulties a church encounters. That is the purpose of the next 7 chapters.
Now, in chapter 7, the Holy Spirit hits the issue of marriage versus a celibate life. We know already that fornication is a deplorable act for any believer. Remember the words of 1 Corinthians 6.
Meats for the belly, and the belly for meats: but God shall destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for fornication, but for the Lord; and the Lord for the body. And God hath both raised up the Lord, and will also raise up us by his own power. Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
A believer’s body belongs to the Lord. Remember we are “bought with a price” and we are “glorify God” in our bodies. Thus, any believer who engages in fornication is grossly misusing what belongs to God for their own gain. Therefore, every believer should take every step necessary so not to engage in such immoral acts. That is where the Holy Spirit now leads us.
Read with me 1 Corinthians 7:1-5 (PEW BIBLE PAGE# 681)
Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
You will note right away that obviously someone or a group of someones within the church of Corinthian wrote a letter to Paul.That letter must have included a question or a request for information concerning relationships between men and women. The Holy Spirit reiterates if for us noting “It is good for a man not to touch a woman.” From there, the Holy Spirit uses this entire chapter to illuminate our minds concerning living a single life versus living a married life.
In these first five verses, the Holy Spirit informs us that...
Married Life is a Great Deterrent to Immorality!
Married Life is a Great Deterrent to Immorality!
Not that He uses the words in verse 2 “to avoid fornication.” Avoiding, as we know, means to keep away from or to stop oneself from doing something. Thus, if a man or woman wishes to avoid “fornication” then marriage is God’s way of doing so. In fact, it was God Who ordained marriage.
And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Christ reiterated God’s establishment of marriage in Matthew 19.
And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
God’s establishment of marriage had many purposes. One of those purposes was to populate the earth through procreation. For this particular purpose, God intentionally made man both male and female. God’s law which is the law of nature requires male and female for another life to be born into this world.
Unlike the stupidity of today's intellectual minds, two men or, as the case may be, two women cannot procreate. Naturally speaking, it is literally impossible no matter what today’s educated crowd tries to tell you. And, on a side note, anything that is not naturally done is artificially done by men and that, my friend, is a very dangerous game to play with God.
Getting back to the point at hand, God ordained marriage. And for the purpose of procreation, He made us both male and female. Thus, the act of sex within marriage is a necessary and expected act from God. God has alway intended for one man to meet and marry one woman for life and to not engage in sexual conduct outside of that marriage. This is God’s perfect will for men and women, and in this present age, especially for believers. Now, I know that even now many of you are thinking about the matter of divorce. Don’t worry that is subject that will be coming us shortly in this same chapter. We will deal with that issue as soon as we get there. For now, the matter at hand is the avoidance of fornication. And, truly, a Biblical marriage is the vehicle by which we as believers should strive to avoid sexual immorality.
Thus,
The Act of Sex within Marriage is Encouraged by God!
The Act of Sex within Marriage is Encouraged by God!
Note verses 3-5.
Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
First, note that husband and wife are to “render” unto each other “due benevolence.”
Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
The word “render” means to make good upon an oath or promise. We all know that every marriage ceremony there is an exchange of vows. The pastor will ask both the bride and the groom these questions...
“Do you take so and so to be your wife, to live with her in the covenant of marriage according to God’s Word? Do you promise to love her, comfort her, honor her, cherish her, and guide her, FORSAKING ALL OTHERS, and be a husband to her alone, as long as you both shall live? If so, answer, ‘I Do.’”
And, then, as you know, the groom and the bride both agree that they will DO so as they have vowed.
I read that to remind you who are married of the vow that you already have taken. And, now, the Holy Spirit is saying “render” or make good on that oath. You are to “render…due benevolence” to each other. There are two nouns here in the Greek. The word “due” is a noun meaning bound by obligation and the word “benevolence” meaning “an inclination to do king and charitable acts.” Thus, we, as husbands along with our wives, are to make good on our oath by which we are bound before God to love each other, comfort each other, to honor each other, and to cherish each other.
By the way, any vow made before the Lord is a vow that He expects you to keep.
When thou shalt vow a vow unto the Lord thy God, thou shalt not slack to pay it: for the Lord thy God will surely require it of thee; and it would be sin in thee.
When thou vowest a vow unto God, defer not to pay it; for he hath no pleasure in fools: pay that which thou hast vowed. Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay.
In the context of chapter 7, keeping that vow and rendering due benevolence to one another is God’s way of keeping you from sexual immorality aka fornication.
Second, note withholding sexual activity within marriage is discouraged.
The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
Please understand that verse 4 is not a license to take advantage of your mate. There are those with perverted minds that would say that their spouses body belongs to them to do with as they see fit. That is not the essence of verse 4. Essentially the Holy Spirit is emphasizing mutual cooperation. Both the believing husband and the believing wife are to mutually come together intimately as God designed them to do.
Verse 5 adds the context to verse 4 by stating...
Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
The word “defraud” means to deprive or keep someone from having, keeping, or obtaining something. In other words, it is wrong for a believing married couple to withhold sex from the other. The only exception is as stated in this verse. That exception being for a time of fasting and prayer.
However, there also comes a warning with that exception. Note that the Holy Spirit states that at end of the stated time of prayer and fasting the couple should “come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.” The idea is of coming together in an intimate way. For what reason? The reason is the temptation that Satan will put before you of sexual immorality. A temptation that will appeal to your incontinency. That word “incontinency” meaning your inability to restrain yourself or have self-control.
Thus, the act of sex within marriage is something God encourages. In our text, it is encouraged as a deterrent against fornication.
Now, let’s finish the message with the Holy Spirit’s thoughts on...
Living the Single Life vs. Living the Married Life
Living the Single Life vs. Living the Married Life
Note what is written in verses 6-9.
But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
We know from studying the New Testament that Paul was not married. There are absolutely no indications that he had a wife or family. In fact, our text is great proof that he lived a celibate life. Note that under the direction of the Holy Spirit Paul states “For I would that all men were even as I myself…I say therefore to the unmarried…it is good for them if they abide as I.” Thus, we conclude without any doubt that Paul was unmarried.
Living the Single Life Can be a Good Thing!
Living the Single Life Can be a Good Thing!
Note the Holy Spirit says...
“It is good for them if they abide even as I.”
There are some positive to living the single life. There is definitely less responsibility to bear than a person who has a mate and children. And, living a celibate life is something that even Christ himself acknowledged during His ministry on earth. He did so in answer to a question from His disciples. They asked...
His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.
Christ’s answer was...
But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother’s womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
So without a doubt, there are those who can enjoy a celibate life serving the Lord. Paul certainly did. And, without question, a person who is single surely has more time and more ability to serve the Lord without being cumbered with the duties that come with marriage. However, there is this.
Living the Single Life Can be Dangerous Thing!
Living the Single Life Can be Dangerous Thing!
Going back to our text, note again verse 9.
But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
The word “contain” means to exercise self-control. In other words, if a single person (male or female) struggles mightily in their ability control their sexual urges then is better that they marry than live alone. Marriage then becomes the haven for which sexual desires can be met. It is far better to a person to marry than for that person to live under the continuous burn of sinful lust. Lust as we know from James 1 leads to sin and sin to death.
Conclusion
Conclusion
Concerning the matter of marriage, the Holy Spirit has taught us several things this morning. First, marriage is the proper place for sex. Sex outside of marriage is wrong and considered fornication. It goes totally against all that God has ordained for men and women. God encourages married couples to enjoy physical intimacy. Doing so help deter the temptation of sexual immorality. Second, within a believer’s marriage, couples are to “render…due benevolence.” In other words, keep your vow to each other that you made before God. Third, within a believer’s marriage, be careful about withholding intimacy. It is okay to do so for short times of prayer and fasting. However, make sure that you “come together” when those times are done so that Satan’s attempts to tempt to you with sexual immorality do not overcome you. And, then, when it comes to living the single life versus the married life, it is okay to be single. However, be careful. If you struggle with sexual temptations, it is best that you find you a believing mate, get married, and live a life pleasing unto the Lord than to continual struggle with something that you most likely cannot control.
Let me finish with the last thought. All of this we had studied this morning is written in the context of believers and the local church. The instruction is given to those who have accepted Christ as their Lord and Savior. Perhaps you are here this morning and have never accepted Christ personally. If not, may I then invite you to do just that right now. You see living life is already tough. The bondage of sin upon those have not believed in Christ is great. The chains of sin and immorality are holding you hostage this morning. The good news is that Christ has already broken those chains. Because of His act upon the cross at Calvary, He can set you free. If you want to be free this morning, I would encourage to you meet me here at the front in just a moment. Just come down, take my hand, and let me know you want to be free from the bondage of sin. We have folks here this morning who will take you somewhere private and will take you to the Word of God showing you the way of salvation. I hope that will come. We desire more than anything to help you.