Get Out of Your Own Head

Co-Dependence

Co-dependence can be defined as excessive emotional or psychological reliance on a partner, typically one who requires support on account of an illness or addiction. In other words co-dependence is a tool in the toolbox of relationships with the enemy. Satan thrives off of confusion, enabling and emotional instability. Our relationship with God is one of trust and not necessarily the idea the interdependence. Interdependence says the dependence of two or more people or things on each other. Our relationship with God is not a relationship of interdependence as well. We need God more than He needs us. The relationship with God is completely about obedience and trust. We must understand that wisdom bestows well being. God is a guide, God is an instructor and God is a giver of peace not confusion. As simple as the question may be, what does it mean to trust God? The word trust is infused in the idea of a successful relationship amongst God and man.

One of the biggest dangers of co-dependency is the fact that it is filled with enabling. This relationship does not exist unless there is a sense of enabling and a lack of accountability. When we trust in ourselves it’s typically fill with a lot of self-enabling and very little accountability. The inability to trust God is due to the fact that the enemy has filled our heart with distractions, we live in a world of distractions and if we are not careful we will no longer be productive in Christ but distracted by the destructions of Satan. We have made the idea of trust quantitative. Social media is the epitome of this in which we take things as fact based on numbers, we accept things in society based on popularity. The craftiness of Satan has provide such a culture to even creep in to the church.

At face value it’s quite difficult to trust the complexities of life, nonetheless the simplicity of Jesus is a tactic used by the enemy to confuse mankind. Paul writes in second Corinthians chapter 11 verse 3 “But I fear, lest somehow, as the serpent deceived Eve by his craftiness, so your minds may be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ”.

The New King James Version Chapter 3

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart,

And lean not on your own understanding;

6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,

And He shall direct your paths.

What Is Trust?

If I were to ask you what it means to trust something or someone what would you say? I’m certain that there are levels to trust. I may trust the valet to park my car, but I would not trust them to watch my children. I trust the restaurant to PRAYERFULLY prepare my food in the most sanitized way as possible but I would not trust them to file my taxes. Trust is typically based on experience and expertise.

When we are dealing with our trust in the LORD, we are dealing with a God that has never failed, never forsaken, and never abandoned any of us. This is the difference between co-dependence and trust. Co-dependence looks like trust but what the victim does not see is what or who they are dependent on spends a lot more time taking than giving, if they give anything at all but grief.

Trust is something we do, we trust God because of who He is. We understand what He’s done therefore we are confident, reliant and able to put total belief in Him.

Trust is a foundational facet of discipleship.

Isaiah 12:2 Behold, God is my salvation, I will trust and not be afraid

Isaiah 26:3 You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trust in you.

John 14:1 Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me.

Romans 15:13 Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

A Perfected Trust

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart”

The trust is measurable, it’s a trust with ALL - what does this mean? We can trust God but is our trust conditional, I trust Him when things are working in my favor? Do I only trust Him until things do not go as I desire them to go?

The root word of “all” in this text means to make perfect, a complete trust in God and nothing else to this magnitude. God is a go-to, when I’m struggling with the people or situations I’ve put trust in I go to God to work these issues out.

With all my inclination I trust God

With all my determination I trust God

With all my disposition I trust God

With all my courage I trust God

With all my will I trust God

With my attention I trust God

With all my reason I trust God

With all my consideration I trust God

Sin can damage self worth, or it can cause you to find self worth in the wrong things, people and activities. When we find validation in how things or people make a feel we are treading very dangerous water. When we do not want to deal with our sin we validate our issues to give ourselves worth. Meanwhile Satan exhibits this idea of neediness, the enemy will present our issues as identifiers and even present temptation in way that we aren’t alone in our struggles.

The reason why the command is to trust God with all of our heart is because the outpouring of what is in our heart has eternal implications.

You Are Your Worst Crutch

“and lean not on your own understanding”

It’s interesting that as Solomon has this conversation with his son he encourages him through command and reinforces this idea of trusting God by emphasizing the idea to not only trust in God but refrain but the total dependence on ourselves.

It’s almost like being tired after a workout, typically you are looking to lean on something stronger than yourself, what typically happens is eventually we get to a place that even in our positions of exhaustion we can stand up straight and do not have to lean on anything but oxygen we are taking in.

Leaning on our own understanding is more of a comfort than a test of strength. The idea is more so conditional of the position of our spirit than reliance on our own outlook.

Essentially Solomon is instructing his son what do during a period of exhaustion. The idea of leaning in this text pertains to already being a place of resting condition. The worst time to attempt to be foolishly independent is when we have no more energy ourselves. The power of God shows me that I cannot even lean on myself when I’m tired. I have to lean on prayer, I have to lean on songs of praise, I have to lean on scripture because alone I’m not capable of handling everything on my own.

What we have to understand is the difference between relying on God and depending on God. Albeit similar but very different in their approaches. I should have no issue relying on God and the way life works sometimes I have no choice, but dependence on God comes from experience, when I get to a place when I realize that depending on other things instead of God will eventually lead to ruin, I’ll have to make a decision. Reliability is on the grounds of trust, dependency grows at the expense of trusting in no one else but God.

It’s similar to a car, when you have a brand new car you do even think about it not cranking up. Nonetheless when I have a car that’s had some issues I get in with the inclination that I might a plan B just in case it decides it does not want to crank today.

When my reliance on God is inconsistent, sometimes I rely on Him, sometimes depending on how things are going I don’t. The issue is when I’m in a hospital bed and doctors do not know what’s wrong all I might have is prayer, and sometimes I have nothing else to rely on but the Lord. Depending on God grows from consistently trusting in Him regardless of the circumstance. I’m depending on you when things are in my favor, I’m depending on you when my family is out of sorts, no matter the minute or hour I’m depending on God.

He is Worthy to Be Acknowledged

“In all your ways acknowlege Him, and He shall direct your paths”

Again we see this word “all”, we see this word of perfection or completion. In everything we do, God deserves notice or acknowledgement.

Understand the state of being, this word ways at the root means to bend down, or to reach! Everything you are reaching for, God deserves the glory. These are things nestled deep in your spirit the things you desire more than just the day to day tasks! If we attribute it all to God he will make our way straight and our path smooth.

Depending on yourself makes like similar to the Israelites in the wilderness, when I’m not trusting in God i’m lost, i’m discombobulated, i’m out of sorts!

In all of the things I’m reaching or stretching out for I acknowledge God but He has reached further than anyone or anything to pull me out of the depths of my mess, to pull me our of the pits of problems, to lift me out of the foolishness of my falls!

Deuteronomy 10:12 states “to walk in all His ways and to love Him” why, because He first loved us, how dare I not give credit and thanks to the God that allowed me to walk in this direction in the first place.

Conclusion

It makes no sense to depend on ourselves, when we could not even save ourselves from ourselves. It took a God to send His only son to conquer sin that wakes up right along side with us everyday. Sin makes us believe that we can do things on our own that we never had the power to do in the first place, our own understanding is what changed the dynamic of Adam and Eve’s relationship with God and each other. What do you think it will do to us if we do not check it and prioritize God as our source of Trust!