How Much is Too Much

Intro

I know exactly how you are feeling.

Anyone ever have anyone say that to them?

Has anyone ever tried to talk about a problem with someone and everytime you say anything they make it about themselves?

They try to tell you a story about their experience to try to make you feel better.

How about at least they aren’t suffering.

Or they are in a better place.

Yup we know that. Thanks for pointing it out.

If you need anything let me know.

This one is one I have used many times. Until a few years ago someone told me that was the exact wrong thing to say. Think about it.

People are hurting and going through somethign terrible. We just put the responsibility on them to find help.

Main Point

God is enough and we can trust that fact.

Why it Matters

You can’t fix it.

You won’t make them feel better.

There are no words.

Being around a hurting person is uncomfortable.

Why is that?

We are designed to be in relationship with each other and part of that design comes empathy and sympathy.

We don’t like to see people hurt. Especially the ones we love.

The fact is, we DON’T know EXACLY how they are feeling. we aren’t them and we were rised differntly and they are experiencing this differently than us.

The person might be in a better place but they are still going to miss them. When we say that it has potential to make people fell worse for being selfish. “I know they aren’t in pain any more but I miss them so much.”

Platitudes don’t help. Which is where are heading this morning. To see what really CAN and WILL help.

Scripture

Job 16:1–3 NIV

Then Job replied: “I have heard many things like these; you are miserable comforters, all of you! Will your long-winded speeches never end? What ails you that you keep on arguing?

Job says to his friends, actually there is an exclamation point at the end of that sentence, so he exclaimed. You are miserable comforters all of you!

I don’t think his friends were trying to kick him when he was down. I think they were genuinely trying to help Job make sense of this. If you had such a messed up view of who God was as they did you would want to help your friend out of the mess too. But the highway to ruin is paved with good intentions. Our good intentions often get in our way.

We need to let our loved ones feel what they are feeling. The fact is nothing we say will fix it. Nothing we will do will make it okay. When we try to fix it we often times, inadvertantly minimize what they are feeling.

Romans 8:18–39 NIV

I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

18 - Our problems pale in comparisson to Our future in Heaven

19 - The world awaits God's victory?

20 - The world is in pain because of us and now has hope

21 - The fallen world will be renewed with God's people (John 3:16)

22 - It has been wating for this

23 - We have to live in the fall as well - we want out

24 - We have hope because we know what is coming

25 - We are waiting

26 - We have to trust the Holy Spirit He knows what we need even when we don't

27 - We need to reflect the spirit of God

28 - God is the God of redemption. nothing stays bad or pointless

29 - the foreknowledge mentioned in Rom. 8:29 refers to divine active delight. It indicates that, in his own sovereign good pleasure, God set his love on certain individuals, many still to be born, gladly acknowledging them as his own, electing them to everlasting life and glory.

prŏginōskō - It is made up of 2 greek words: 1) Pro - Prior, in front of, before and 2) ginōskō - To know or be aware of

This reveals the fact that in his purpose according to election the persons are not the objects of God’s ‘bare foreknowledge’ but of his ‘active delight.

30 - the first term, foreknew, directs our attention to the persons whom God elected and only in a general way to their final destiny (everlasting life, glory), He elected them because of the foreknowledge of they faith, the term Predestined fixes our thought more definitely on the purpose for which they were elected and on the means of attaining it. That goal is not just “to enter heaven at last” but “to be conformed to the image of God’s Son, Jesus.”

3. Calling: God’s call from death to life those upon whom he has set his love (cf. the calling forth of Lazarus in John 11).

4. Regeneration: God’s quickening, making alive, the spirit of those who are called so that they can believe.

5. Faith: God’s gift of faith (Eph. 2:8–9) exercised by the regenerate.

6. Repentance: The turning from sin of those who have believed (this step is often combined with faith into a step of faith-repentance, or repentance and faith).

7. Justification: God’s declaring as righteous those who have repented and believed.

8. Adoption: God’s inclusion of the justified in the family of God.

9. Sanctification: God’s work through the Holy Spirit to conform those in the family of God into the image of his Son.

10. Perseverance: God’s insuring that those who are effectively called complete their pilgrimage of faith.

11. Glorification: God’s fulfillment of his purposes—the making of fallen sinners into the image of his Son, Jesus Christ, for eternity.

Why does this matter and what does this have to do with pain and suffering?

EVERYTHING! As we heard through this series. God loves you!

31 - God give us value and strength

32 - He gave so much already why would we doubt that he will give more

33 - We cant be judged by others we are already judged

34 - The only ONE who can condemn us chooses not to

35 - What can separate us from Jesus

36 - We are willing

37 - We are More than conquerors because of Jesus

38 - I am convinced

39 - NOTHING can separate us from God

THAT! That truth! NOTHING can separate us from God. We can take comfort in that.

That is why we have to be active in our faith! So that when we need to “see God more clearly” we know he will be there.

When we are active in our faith we see God move through us and around us. If we do the bare minimum we rely too much on our own strength.

I will refer back to C.S. Lewis’ statement about his wife’s passing, “If I had empathised as much as I believed I did with the losses and struggles of others then perhapse my own struggle of the loss of my wife would not have been as devistating.”

The Church exists to hold each other up. Hebrews 10:25

Hebrews 10:25 NIV

not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

James 2:14–18 (NIV)

James 2:14–18 NIV

What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.” Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds.

We need to see God more clearly when we are suffering.

Which brings me back around to Job and his companions. They were trying to help Job make sense of it all. ALl they ended up doing was hurting Job more and angering God.

Job after his sadness, sorrow, questioning still carried God’s favour. Job knew the LORD had never turned on him. He sat in his misery and asked why and mourned. His friends tried to pull him out of it. and as Job said in 16:2 “You are miserable comforters, all of you!”

So what do we do?

Recap:

1. Why do we need a healthy understanding of suffering? If we have to figure it out while we suffer it is too late. God is good and He is with you even when we suffer the evil of this fallen world. We may never understand why but we DO understand that we are not alone. We have God and His Church.

2. Why doesn’t God just get rid of evil? Where does He stop? All evil or just the inconvienient and painful evil? IF God took away evil He woudl also be taking away our choice to love Him and that also would removed his grace and justice. We would be puppets.

3. When pain and suffering comes we need to hold on to the facts of our faith. God CHOSE US. It is forever. It is temporary. We have help through God Himself and his Church. See the thread here?

GOD AND HIS CHURCH!

Application

So, someone in our lives is suffering. What do we say and or do? Here are a few suggestions that are better than the ones I mentions at the beginning of this message:

What do you need right now?

Do you have everything you need?

What can I do?

Tell a nice story of the person they are struggling with.

Remember to reach out a few weeks AFTER the funeral or surgery or moment of pain they shared with you.

I am sorry.

We are praying for you.

When in doubt say NOTHING!

Closing

God is big enough to take our questions and sadness and even anger. He gave us all of those emotions and feelings. In the end He has won and we have claimed that victory. In the mean time He has given us each other. Let’s not squander this gift and help each other as we walk through this world.