Grow Up: Are You a Growing Christian?

Romans 12:9–21 ESV

Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Ending the Battle Between Neighbors

300 Sermon Illustrations from Charles Spurgeon Ending the Battle between Neighbors (Matthew 5:9, 23–25, 44; Romans 12:18–21; Hebrews 12:14)

William Ladd had a farm in one of the states of America, and his neighbor, Pulsifer, was a great trouble to him, for he kept a breed of gaunt, long-legged sheep, as active as spaniels, that would spring over almost any sort of fence. These sheep were very fond of a fine field of grain belonging to Mr. Ladd, and were in it continually. Complaints were of no use, for Pulsifer evidently cared nothing for his neighbor’s losses.

One morning Ladd said to his men, “Set the dogs on those sheep, and if that won’t keep them out, shoot them.” After he had said that, he thought to himself, “This will not do. I had better try the peace principle.” So he sent to his men and countermanded the order, and rode over to see his neighbor about those troublesome sheep. “Good morning,” said he, but he received no answer. So he tried again, and got nothing but a sort of grunt. “Neighbor,” he said, “I have come to see you about those sheep.”

“Yes,” Pulsifer replied, “I know. You are a pretty neighbor to tell your men to kill my sheep! You a rich man, too, and going to shoot a poor man’s sheep!” Then followed some very strong language.

But Ladd replied, “I was wrong, neighbor, and I am sorry for it. Think no more about it. But, neighbor, we may as well agree. It seems I have got to keep your sheep, and it won’t do to let them eat all that grain, so I came over to say that I will take them into my homestead pasture and I will keep them all the season; and if any one is missing you shall have the pick of mine.”

Pulsifer looked confounded, and then stammered out, “Now, Squire, are you in earnest?” When he found that Ladd really meant to stand to the offer, Pulsifer stood still a moment and then said, “The sheep won’t trouble you anymore. When you talk about shooting I can shoot as well as you; but when you speak in that kind and neighborly way I can be kind too.” The sheep never trespassed into Ladd’s lot any more.

That is the way to kill a bad spirit. This is overcoming evil with good. If one had begun shooting, and the other had followed suit, they certainly would have been both losers, and both been overcome. But when the offended one made kindness his only return the battle was over.

The Sermon in a Sentence

Christians need to grow and mature in the Lord—2 Peter 3:18. There should be daily growth. Jesus said we should seek perfection—Matthew 5:48. A non-growing Christian will backslide. Their carnal living will hurt God’s work and will create problems in his own life as well as others.

The Christian Practice— “We are known by the love we practice that translates into the service we provide.”

Possess the God-kind of love

Live righteously

Love one another like family

Preferring one’s neighbor

Serve with joy through the Spirit to those in need

The series begins by calling the reader’s attention to the absolute primacy of genuine love. Jesus told his disciples in John 13:35 . Some view the exhortation to love as the theme that is then particularized in the following sequence of participial clauses. Nygren remarks that “one needs only to make ‘love’ the subject throughout 12:9–21, to see how close the contents of this section are to 1 Corinthians 13.” The adjective translated “sincere” (anupokritos) means “without deception or hypocrisy.” “Your service in the kingdom is linked to your love for God and his kingdom.” Apparently there is a danger that in certain cases what looks like love is actually something quite distinct. Calvin comments, “It is difficult to express how ingenious almost all men are in counterfeiting a love which they do not really possess.” Love must never be used as a disguise for ulterior aims. True love is free from all pretense and hypocrisy. The word love here in the Greek is the word agape, meaning to have love for someone or something, based on sincere appreciation and high regard

Next, the believer is called upon to “hate what is evil.” E. Brunner writes that love, “if it is not to degenerate into sentimentality … must include a strict objectivity: hatred against evil, faithful adherence to what is good.” A person cannot love God who paid for the sins you and will commit, and be comfortable with evil and sin. To love God is to regard evil with horror. Unfortunately, familiarity with a culture that is shaped by the forces of Satan has lulled too many believers into a state of general tolerance for whatever deviant behavior is in vogue at present. We are to abhor evil because it is the enemy of all that leads to Christlikeness. Being afraid of what others will say only serves to bring shame to God’s name. What God seeks in the believer is not so much a single worthy act as it is a continuing quality of life. We are to turn away from all evil and “cling to what is good.” The Greek participle comes from a verb (kollaō) that means “to glue or join together.” In 1 Cor 6:16 it is used to describe a sexual union. Holding on tightly to that which is right becomes a necessity in view of our natural inclination to fall back into sin (cf. 7:15–20). Believers are to be tenderly affectionate with one other in the bonds of brotherly love (v. 10). As a result of this affectionate relationship they will not seek their own good but outdo one another in showing honor. The TCNT translates, “In showing respect, set an example of deference to one another.” In a similar vein Paul encouraged the Philippians to “consider others better than” themselves (Phil 2:3). To honor the other person is one way of holding in check the innate human tendency to honor oneself unduly.

Paul warned his readers about the debilitating results of lethargy, “Never be lacking in zeal” (v. 11). The Greek word her is spoude, meaning, to be eager to do something, with the implication of readiness to expend energy and effort. In whatever they do they are to put their whole heart and soul into it (cf. Col 3:23). Believers are to be aglow with the Spirit. The life-giving presence of the Holy Spirit radically alters the way a person lives. Goodspeed speaks of being “on fire with the Spirit.” A Spirit-filled believer by definition cannot be dull and boring. That would be a contradiction in terms. Christians are called to serve the Lord. This service is by no means drudgery. Servants of God continually rejoice in their hope. The Greek word elpis in the New Testament is confident trust rather than uncertain expectation. Käsemann says that hope is “confident reaching out for the eschatological future.” According to Calvin (commenting on “rejoicing in hope”), Paul warned us against remaining content with earthly joys and counseled us to “raise our minds to heaven, that we may enjoy full and solid joy.” The apostle Peter spoke of being born anew “into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ” (1 Pet 1:3). The reality of that hope brings joy. This world will have its full share of difficulties (John 16:33), but the believer is to be steadfast in time of trouble. The realization that life is to some extent an obstacle course keeps a person from being surprised when things do not go as planned. Afflictions are to be borne patiently. And the source of spiritual help during such times is prayer. So Paul counseled his readers, “Steadfastly maintain the habit of prayer” (Phillips). Barclay comments, “No man should be surprised when life collapses if he insists on living it alone.” Most Christians will confess the difficulty of maintaining a regular and effective prayer life. The reason is not difficult to discern. If Satan can keep us out of touch with God, he will not have to worry about any trouble we might cause for his evil kingdom. In Gal 6:10 Paul instructed the members of the church to “do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” In Romans 12 he added specificity to that rather general instruction: “Share with God’s people who are in need” (v. 13). The level of poverty and the need for help were relatively high in the early church. It was critical for believers who had enough and more to share their abundance with those who were in need (cf. 2 Cor 8:13–14). And finally, Paul indicated the moral responsibility of showing hospitality. In a day when inns were scarce and not always desirable, it was critical for believers to extend hospitality to Christians (and others) who were traveling. For example, the good Samaritan in Luke 10:25-37 The author of Hebrews counsels hospitality to strangers on the basis that by so doing one may perhaps entertain angels without knowing it (Heb 13:2).

The Christian’s Patience

Bless before you curse

Share with Christians in all times

Possess the Spirit of humbleness

Be a person of peace.

Never seek vengance

This paragraph contains six exhortations that are stated positively and three that take a negative form. The apostle urged his readers to invoke God’s blessing on behalf of those who persecute them. We remember the teaching of Jesus on the Mount, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matt 5:44 // Luke 6:28). The Greek Word is dioko, meaning, to systematically organzie a program to oppress and harass people. Stephen provided an example of this godly attitude when as he was being stoned, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them” (Acts 7:60; cf. 1 Cor 4:12). The principle of nonretaliation for personal injury permeates the entire New Testament. It provides guidance when life brings us up against those who care nothing for us and are in fact opposed to all that we stand for. Ask that they might enjoy the blessings of God! Love inevitably desires the best for other people regardless of who they may be. The old nature says, “Curse them”; God says, “Ask me to bless them.” God’s will is that his children become a family where the joys of one become the joys of all and the pain of one is gladly shared by all the others. The Christian experience is not one person against the world but one great family living out together the mandate to care for one another. So rejoice with those who are rejoicing, and weep with those who are weeping (v. 15). The elder brother in the account of the prodigal son provides an example of the failure to join in rejoicing (Luke 15:25–32). On the other hand, the Gospels record that upon meeting Mary following the death of her brother, “Jesus wept” (John 11:35). Pride sows the seeds of discord. The tendency to regard oneself as worthy of preferential treatment is universal in scope. The entire range of personal conflict, which reaches all the way from minor squabbles to international wars, reflects the misguided idea that we are better than they or that they have done something against us.

So Paul counseled us to “live in harmony with one another” (v. 16). This unity is less the result of accommodation to the other person’s point of view than it is the result of arriving at a mutual understanding of God’s way of thinking. Like spokes in a wheel that converge at the hub, the closer we are to God the closer we come to one another. Paul admonished his readers not to be proud since it is pride more than anything else that destroys the harmony of the body. At issue in the second sentence of v. 16 is the question of the gender of the two pronominal adjectives. The first is neuter, but the second is either masculine or neuter. Goodspeed takes the second as neuter and translates, “Do not be too ambitious, but accept humble tasks.” Berkeley has, “Do not aspire to eminence, but willingly adjust yourselves to humble situations.” Similar to the NIV (which takes the second adjective as masculine) is Phillip’s, “Don’t become snobbish, but take a real interest in ordinary people,” and Norlie’s, “Avoid being haughty; mingle with the lowly.” In either case the admonition is to get off one’s high horse and come to grips with reality. There are both humble tasks and ordinary people who need our attention. To withdraw from either is to allow pride to control our lives. Cranfield writes, “It is always a sign of the worldliness of the Church when its ‘leaders’ no longer associate as readily and freely with humble people both inside and outside the Church as with those who are socially superior.” So the verse ends with the cogent advice, “Don’t think too highly of yourselves” (TCNT). No one is to assume complete knowledge. Isaiah spoke of the folly of those who were “wise in their own eyes” and “clever in their own sight” (Isa 5:21; cf. Prov 3:7). Morris observes that “the person who is wise in his own eyes is rarely so in the eyes of other people.”

The Christian’s Peace

The natural impulse is to return injury for injury. But retaliation for personal injury is not for those who claim to follow the one who told his disciples to turn the other cheek and go the second mile (Matt 5:39, 41; cf. Gal 6:10; 1 Thess 5:15; 1 Pet 3:9). Instead, believers are to be careful to do what is honorable in the sight of everyone (cf. Prov 3:4). The early church understood the necessity of having a good reputation with outsiders (1 Tim 3:7). Although it is imperative that believers take pains to do what is right in God’s sight, it also is important that what we do, as long as it does not violate Christian ethics, is well thought of by the world (cf. 2 Cor 8:21). In so far as it is possible, we are called to live at peace with everyone. Wickedness is to be opposed and righteousness lauded, but Christians must be careful not to allow their allegiance to God to alienate them from the world they are intended to reach with the gospel. Jesus pronounced a blessing upon the peacemaker (Matt 5:9), and the author to Hebrews wrote that we are to “make every effort to live in peace with all men” (Heb 12:14).

The Christian’s Person

Christians are never to take vengeance into their own hands (v. 19; cf. Lev 19:18). Rather, we must allow the wrath of God to follow its own course. After all, it is written: “It is for me to avenge. I am the one who will repay.” Christians are not called upon to help God carry out divine retribution. God has promised to “pay back trouble to those who trouble you” (2 Thess 1:6). He has no need of our help or advice. Genuine trust will leave everything in his hands. Rather than to take revenge we are to feed our enemies if they are hungry and give them something to drink if they are thirsty. In this way we will “make him feel a burning sense of shame” (Moffatt). Verse 21 summarizes much of what has just been said. Instead of allowing evil to get the upper hand and bring defeat, win the victory against that which is wrong by doing what is right. Bruce comments, “The best way to get rid of an enemy is to turn him into a friend.” Our most powerful weapon against evil is the good. To respond to evil with evil is not to overcome it but to add to it. Believers are called upon to live victoriously in a hostile world by continuing to live as Jesus lived. Right will inevitably prevail against wrong. God is on his throne, and though all is not right in this world, he is the one who will avenge the wicked and reward the righteous.

The Ending Sermon in a Sentence

The mature Christian is a happy person, a helpful person. The life of a mature Christian will leave a lasting impact on the non-Christian. To become mature requires the discipline of yielding our lives to God, His Spirit, His Word, His will.