A Marriage Made in Heaven

We have come to the end of our series, “Foof-Proofing Your Life.” Through the month of August, we have been looking at the book of Proverbs, which is in the Old Testament of the Bible. This extraordinary book is full of short sayings that are chock-full of wisdom, designed to help you avoid foolishness and live a life that honours God. My hope with this month’s teaching is that you would re-dedicate yourself to living wisely for the glory of God.

Today, we are going to look at the last chapter of the book, chapter 31, and I believe that this passage has something to teach all of us.

I say all of us, because this passage is often over-highlighted for women - after all, it says in big, bold letters, at least in my Bible, that this passage describes a “WIFE OF NOBLE CHARACTER.”

And to be fair, many women have found, in this description, inspiration of the kind of woman and wife they want to be. But there is two problems with setting this as a modern standard for women.

First, some women have looked at this passage and have found an unattainable standard that has left them feeling guilty of not being good enough, of not measuring up. That has left them with this constant sense of shame in the back of their minds, which then can affect all the areas of their lives and all their relationships, including their relationship with God. But that’s not God’s intent for your life.

Romans 8:1 NLT

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.

Because of his deep and abiding love for you, God sent Jesus to take away your sin, to take away your guilt, to take away your shame through is sacrifice on the cross. God wants you walk in freedom, not in bondage to an unattainable standard.

Galatians 5:1 NLT

So Christ has truly set us free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don’t get tied up again in slavery to the law.

So God’s intent in this passage is not to make women feel bad about what they are not doing. There’s already too much of that in our world. No, God’s intent is something else entirely.

The second problem with seeing this as just a woman’s verse is that this passage was actually written to a man. If we take it on just a surface level, it is a king’s instruction to his son about what can of woman he should marry. Historically, men have then used this passage to set the standard for how women should live and judging them. And they often got away with it in patriarchal societies. But as our culture has become far more egalitarian, the idea of men imposing a standard for how women should live is offensive.

So how should we interpret this passage? I would contend that this passage isn’t about how women should live. I believe this passage is a picture of a life where a person has lived with wisdom. I believe that it is using the image of a wife to convey truth for all of us, both men and women, married and single, those with kids and those without. After all, in the New Testament, the church is called the Bride of Christ. This passage shows us some principles about how we, the church, the people of God, can bring glory to God.

So, let’s read the passage, and then I want to share four ways that Proverbs 31 teaches us to give glory to God.

Proverbs 31:10–31 NLT

Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She finds wool and flax and busily spins it. She is like a merchant’s ship, bringing her food from afar. She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan the day’s work for her servant girls. She goes to inspect a field and buys it; with her earnings she plants a vineyard. She is energetic and strong, a hard worker. She makes sure her dealings are profitable; her lamp burns late into the night. Her hands are busy spinning thread, her fingers twisting fiber. She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy. She has no fear of winter for her household, for everyone has warm clothes. She makes her own bedspreads. She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns. Her husband is well known at the city gates, where he sits with the other civic leaders. She makes belted linen garments and sashes to sell to the merchants. She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future. When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness. She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness. Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her: “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!” Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.

PRAY

The first thing our passage teaches us is to be hard-working to the glory of God.

Be Hard-working to the Glory of God

Proverbs 31:17 NLT

She is energetic and strong, a hard worker.

One of the undervalued attributes of a Christian is the work ethic we should have. In our passage in Proverbs 31 there are multiple references to how hard this woman works. She sews garments and bedding. She manages the house and the servants. She buys and sells property. She is a hard-worker and I believe that, as followers of Jesus, we should be hard workers as well.

Colossians 3:17 NLT

And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.

Pastor, Theologian and Author Henry Ironside told the story of when we was a boy in the late 1800’s he wanted to financially help his widowed mother, so he got a summer job working for a shoemaker, or “cobbler” as they were known then. The cobbler was a Christian man, who was very outspoken about his faith. He would have Bible verses plastered on the walls, he gave out little gospel booklets with his sales and he would talk about Jesus with his customers. Often he led people to follow Jesus, right there in the shoe shop.

Henry Ironside’s job was to pound leather for the shoe soles. A piece of cowhide would be cut to size, then soaked in water. He had a flat piece of iron over his knees and, with a flat-headed hammer, he pounded the soles until they were hard and dry. It seemed an endless operation to him, and he confessed that he got sick and tired of it many times.

One day, he passed by another cobbler’s shop on his way home. This other cobbler gathered the boys of the neighborhood and told vulgar tales to them that made him dreaded by the respectable parents. But somehow, it seemed like his business was thriving. Henry looked in his window and and noticed that the man never pounded out the soles like he did, he just took them right from the water and put them on the shoe, splashing water with each nail he drove in. So Henry went in to this man’s shop and asked him about it. He said, “I notice you put the soles on while still wet. Are they just as good as if they were pounded?" He gave Henry a wicked leer as he answered, "They come back all the quicker this way, my boy!"

When he returned to the shop where he worked, he told the Christian owner about what he saw and suggested that maybe he was wasting time pounding out the leather until it was dry. The owner stopped his work, grabbed his Bible and opened it to a verse that says, “Whatever you do, do it all to the glory of God.”

"Harry," he said, "I do not cobble shoes just for the four bits and six bits (50c or 75c) that I get from my customers. I am doing this for the glory of God. I expect to see every shoe I have ever repaired in a big pile at the judgment seat of Christ, and I do not want the Lord to say to me in that day, 'Dan, this was a poor job. You did not do your best here.' I want Him to be able to say, 'Well done, good and faithful servant.'"

Whatever job you do, God calls you to work hard at it and to do your best. I believe that our credibility as followers of Jesus is connected to work ethic. If the people around you see you as lazy, they will not respect you. And if they don’t respect you, they won’t listen to you. I experienced this first hand when I worked at a roofing supply company. The boss was unsure of me at first, since my resume was mostly just pastoring jobs at that point. But soon, he and other co-workers saw that I was a hard worker. While some guys hid in the back where they couldn’t be seen and laid down, I was out sweeping the parking lot or re-stacking pallets of shingles or shovelling snow. One guy actually asked me to stop working so hard because I was making him look bad. I refused. And because of that, I had my boss’s respect, and that of other co-workers which led me to have credibility in my faith and I was even able to share my faith story with one of them.

Colossians 3:23–24 NLT

Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ.

God calls us to be hard workers - to put aside laziness and work, whether we are cleaning our house, volunteering somewhere or at our job, to glory of God.

The first thing we are called to do in our passage is to work hard for the glory of God. The second thing we are called to do is be generous to glory of God.

Be Generous to the Glory of God

I read a story this week about Hattie May Wiatt. Born in 1877 , she lived in Philadelphia and when she was about 5 or 6 years old she wanted to go to Sunday school at Grace Baptist Church, but it was so full, she couldn’t get in. She was noticed outside by the pastor, who picked her up, and brought her inside the Sunday school room for her to enjoy the lesson that morning. The next morning, he was walking to the church and he walked by her house and saw her as she was on her way to school. He told her, we are going to build a bigger Sunday school room - one that can fit all the children. Soon, we are going to start raising the money for it.” There were no concrete plans for a bigger room, just a pastor with a vision for it. Soon, Hattie got sick and she died. She had gathered though, 57 cents which she had wanted to give to the church for its building program. At the funeral, the mother gave the pastor the small amount of change. He then exchanged it all for pennies and as he told his congregation of the generosity of this 6-year old girl, he sold the pennies to congregants, raising $250 from it. That was enough to buy the house north of the church to turn it into a bigger Sunday school. Soon, more people heard the story and seeing the need they gave generously. From that meagre 57 cents, Grace Baptist Church grew and soon founded Temple University and Temple University Hospital. All because a 6-year old girl gave generously what she could.

God calls us to be generous people. In our passage in Proverbs 31, it says,

Proverbs 31:20 NLT

She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy.

The woman described here is a generous person who helps others, just as we are to be. When we help the poor, whether we help them personally or through an organization like House of Blessing, we do so because we recognize that all we have is given to us by God and he has given it to us for a purpose.

2 Corinthians 9:10–11 NLT

For God is the one who provides seed for the farmer and then bread to eat. In the same way, he will provide and increase your resources and then produce a great harvest of generosity in you. Yes, you will be enriched in every way so that you can always be generous. And when we take your gifts to those who need them, they will thank God.

Did you catch that? Paul tells us that God has given to you, so that you can give to others. You have been enriched so that you can be generous to others. In fact, the more you have, the more you are to be generous. So let me ask you a question? What is your attitude when it comes to helping the poor? Do you dismiss them as a blight on society or are you willing to be extra generous to them, not in an attitude of superiority but in humility, as one who has been entrusted to care for them? Let us be generous to the poor and needy to the glory of God.

Proverbs 31 teaches us to work hard to the glory of God and to be generous for the glory of God. The third thing we learn here is that we are to be full of faith to the glory of God.

Be Full of Faith to Glory of God

Proverbs 31:25 NLT

She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.

I don’t know about you, but these days that we are in feel joyless. When it comes to COVID 19, we are tired of it and the limitations we continue to experience. Comment sections on social media are constantly going back and forth with vitrol for those who view the vaccine and the vaccine passports differently than they do. We are in middle of an election, throwing our politics into chaos. We know that there are more unmarked graves at former residential schools that will be found. Afghanistan is in chaos as the Taliban have taken it over. There are still wildfires ravaging western Canada, California and many other states causing hundreds of people to lose their homes and businesses, there is massive flooding in New York and along the Eastern Seaboard that has killed 21 people, and Hurricane Ida has caused millions in damages in Louisiana. There isn’t much to be joyful about it seems.

But the woman described in Proverbs 31 laughs at the days to come. She laughs because her strength and her dignity don’t come from how good her circumstances are, or how easy and comfortable life is or what others say about her. Her strength and dignity come from the Lord. She knows that God is for her, not against her. She knows that the Holy Spirit who is in her is greater than the spirit who is the world. She knows her name is written in the lamb’s book of life. She knows that no matter what comes next, God is with her. So she can laugh in the days to come.

Can you laugh at the days to come? Do you know that Jesus of Nazareth, who was both fully God and fully human, loves you so deeply that he willingly let himself be sacrificed on a cross in order to make peace between you and God the Father? Have you put your faith in Jesus and surrendered your life to him? If you have, then you can look out to the future and know that God will be with you and that nothing can separate you from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus. You can laugh at the days to come because your faith determines your outlook on the world and you know you are secure in Christ.

If you haven’t yet put your full faith in Jesus, why not? What’s holding you back? Whatever it is, let it go and come to Jesus who loves you and wants to clothe you in strength and dignity. If you want to talk more about what that means, please send me an email to [e-mail] and we can continue in this faith journey together.

We need to work hard to the glory of God, be generous for the glory of God and be full of faith to the glory of God. The fourth thing the woman of Proverbs 31 teaches us is that we are to be wise to the glory of God.

Be Wise to the Glory of God

It says of the woman of Proverbs 31 that “When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.”

The whole book of Proverbs is about being wise. Having wisdom in your finances. Having wisdom in your relationships. Having wisdom to avoid sin so that you can walk in intimacy with God. We are called by God to avoid foolishness - to fool-proof your life - so that we can enjoy the abundant life that Jesus offers to us. In John 10:10 Jesus says, “The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.” God wants us to enjoy our lives but in order to enjoy our lives, we have to have wisdom to say no to the wrong things and yes to the right things.

And most of those decisions are small decisions - Should I put my phone down and pick up my Bible? Can I afford that thing? Even if I can afford it, is it worth the money? Should I go golfing with my friends or spend time with my wife and kids? But these small decisions add up.

There is an ancient legend of a king who loved chess. He challenged visitors to a game, and was usually victorious. One day a traveling sage visited the kingdom and was challenged to a game. To entice him to play, the king offered to give the sage whatever reward he asked if he won. When the king was defeated, to honour his word he asked the sage what prize he would like. The sage asked for one grain of rice to placed on the first square of the chessboard, and then that it be doubled on each following square.

The request seemed modest, and the king ordered a bag of rice to be brought. One grain was placed on the first square, two on the second, four on the third, eight on the fourth and so on. But it quickly became apparent the terms of the request were impossible to meet. By the twenty-first square more than one million grains of rice would be required. By the thirty-first square the total would go over one billion—with more than half of the chessboard still left to go.

Small decisions have a big impact when they are added together. Your life, right now, is the result of all the decisions you have made up to this point. Wisdom is choosing what is best over what is immediate and when we start making those decisions, even in the small things, it will add up to a good and healthy life.

Conclusion

The description of a wife of noble character is a passage for all of us, to help us strive towards a life that brings glory to God. It is true that God loves and and accepts us in our unwisest, most broken states. Paul writes in Romans 5:8 “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.” We are not saved because of our goodness or even because of our potential. We are saved because of God’s love for us. But God doesn’t want us to keep living in a way that is opposite of his great plan for us. We desires that we walk in wisdom and experience a rich and satisfying life in loving devotion to God. The challenge we find from Proverbs 31 is that we are to work hard to the glory of God, be generous for the glory of God, be full of faith to the glory of God and be wise to the glory of God.

May God empower us through the Holy Spirit to glorify God in how we live. Pray.