Taming the tongue

Introduction

As I mentioned last week, James is one of those books that when you read it, you realize you got some areas of your life you need to work on. Another way to look at the book of James is that it is also a practical guide for what does it mean to act more Christ-like. In other words, James helps put into practical ways what Jesus has demonstrated and taught us to be and act like. As mentioned last week, our faith is what compels us to works of loving our neighbor as ourselves and our works demonstrate to others what our faith is. If Jesus said love your neighbor but he refused to answer the disciples many questions, then he would have demonstrated no patience and no love for them. Yet Jesus demonstrated much love and patience not just for the disciples but for the Israelites and Gentiles. Even on the cross, he still conveyed this love when he asked the Father not to hold this against them. This week, we continue in James in an area that most people tend to ignore to excuse away or justify in their own ways. Today we need to tame our tongue to speak what our faith is based on.

James 3:1–12 NRSV

1 Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers and sisters, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. 2 For all of us make many mistakes. Anyone who makes no mistakes in speaking is perfect, able to keep the whole body in check with a bridle. 3 If we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we guide their whole bodies. 4 Or look at ships: though they are so large that it takes strong winds to drive them, yet they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. 5 So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great exploits. How great a forest is set ablaze by a small fire! 6 And the tongue is a fire. The tongue is placed among our members as a world of iniquity; it stains the whole body, sets on fire the cycle of nature, and is itself set on fire by hell. 7 For every species of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by the human species, 8 but no one can tame the tongue—a restless evil, full of deadly poison. 9 With it we bless the Lord and Father, and with it we curse those who are made in the likeness of God. 10 From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this ought not to be so. 11 Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and brackish water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brothers and sisters, yield olives, or a grapevine figs? No more can salt water yield fresh.

Tiny yet powerful

James gives many illustrations for how the tongue may be so small in relation to the rest of our bodies, yet so powerful over our lives and direction we take. We don’t like to acknowledge this do we, we still think it small and not having a large influence over our lives. You have heard the expression, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” Now, in all fairness, this is meant to try and help people who are on the receiving end of those hurtful things people say but I will say it does not work very well if at all. To me, it is still diminishing the power of words spoken over others, both positive and negative. Lets talk about that further, words that cut deep and words that lift up.

Tiny words cut deep

If you were to look about on the things people have said to you other the past week, think back at how many times those words were not positive but demeaning. Think back to how many times those words were uplifting. What is ironic is that often times we remember those words that cut deep or hurt our feelings much more clearly than the positive ones the same person spoke to us. My point being, your slip up where you said something mean to someone outlasts the apology you might have spoke immediately afterwards. Tiny words can cut deep. Don’t underestimate what your words can do to others. Also remember that words speak to who you are and empty promises also cut deep in our relationships. When we promise and fail, it breaks down the trust. As Jesus said, be careful in your vows, if you must vow then you must do everything you can to fulfill it.

Tiny words get us through the day

A friend once told me that when you say something negative to someone it takes saying 10 positive things to offset that one negative thing you said. It is funny how that works isn’t it. Think back in the past week how many kind or uplifting words you have spoken to someone. What is ironic in this situation is that someones those kind words came at just the right time for that person. When I have a bad day at work, a kind word helps me to remember that things are temporary, one day does not make me a failure at my job, circumstances can change. Sometimes being told the things that you are doing well help to offset the things that you are not doing well at. Other times, you may not understand why but when you feel the need to say something kind, even to a stranger, please do. You don’t know what they are going through and when God is telling you to speak some kindness and love into their lives. I can tell you God absolutely does this and it can sometimes be the easiest way to bless someone without a lot of effort.

Tame the tongue or it will rule over you

I cannot emphasize enough how important controlling your words is to your life and the well being of others around you. People see the kind of person you are based not just on your actions but also your words. If you are the kind of person who says kind things to someone’s face yet talks ugly about them behind their backs, you are now known as being two-faced, not Christ-like at all. Be careful the words you speak line up with who you are supposed to be and don’t get caught up in things like gossip and belittling others as those don’t line up with what Jesus expects of you. When we continue to be dance between the two ways of living, worldly and Christ-like, then we cannot be Christ-like. As James concluded, you can’t produce good fruit in your life, if you still speak to others in un-Christian like ways, in unloving ways. Instead master your tongue and focus on speaking words of life instead of words of destruction. Master and tame your tongue or it will control who you are rather than you letting God make you into who you can be.