Chapter Five part II: An Unlikely Prophet
2 DEFINITIONS AND KEY THOUGHTS
• Jealousy and envy are siblings, the perverse children of a toxic mix of anger, anxiety-based insecurity, and an obsessive habit of comparing oneself (usually poorly) with others.
• There is also a root of fear in most jealousy—the fear of losing the love or praise of one’s object of love or affection.
• Envy wants what someone else has.
• Jealousy is being fearful that something one has attained will be taken. Jealousy also involves a triangle—three people, one of which is the jealous person becoming fixated on a (usually misperceived) rival, who is viewed as competing for the attention of the third person.
• Scripture says that love as “strong as death” will produce powerful jealousy that is “as cruel as the grave” (Song of Sol. 8:6).
• Envy may be defined as wanting what someone else has, whether it is status, possessions, lifestyle, relationships, or characteristics.
• Left unchecked, envy can develop into malice, contempt, and destruction of others (see 1 Sam. 18:9 to see envy in the life of Saul).
• Envy manifests itself in the resentment of others’ prosperity.
• Envy will be evident in one’s dislike of another. The envious person will not necessarily be aware that the dislike is prompted by envy.
• Envy is fueled by the expectation of deserving more success and recognition than another person. Envy, therefore, is closely linked to pride and greed.
• Envy is the opposite of love. Love rejoices over the good of another. Envy seeks the destruction of another for the benefit of oneself.
• Envy is ultimately a rebellion against one’s own finiteness and God’s provision. When people struggle with envy, they reject God’s provision as well as how God uniquely created them to be.
• Scripture tells us that the Lord is “a jealous God” (Exod. 34:14), but the Lord’s jealousy is righteous. God is jealous for the church (2 Cor. 11:2). Paul warns us, however, not to provoke the Lord to jealousy (1 Cor. 10:20–22).
Envy is a symptom of lack of appreciation of our own uniqueness and self-worth. Each of us has something to give that no one else has.