Marriage, Manhood, & Womanhood: The Foundation (part 1)

Humble submission is the foundation to a spirit-filled marriage.

INTRODUCTION

OUR LEAK // Foundation //Collapse

Spiritual trickles can destroy a marriage (& home) // These happen over time. We’ve heard this and has become cliche… divorce, adultery, abuse, it doesn’t happen over time, but a trickle at a time.

These leaks begin with trickles of selfishness, machismo, control, bitterness, lack of trust, anger, lack of patience ,lack of understanding roles.

The reason with these pervasive sinful leaks in our marriages that can’t be met with forgiveness, confession, repentance is that we haven’t BUIILT our FOUNDATION on the right ground.

Ephesians 5:21 is the foundation we must build our marriage and home on.

READ Ephesians 5:15-21

[[CONTEXT]] Spirit filled believers are characterized by a life of submission to one another.

Thesis: The foundation to any marriage and family is mutual submission - this is how you build your family.

1. The MATTER

A. Submission is necessary

Society&Home break down without it

How do you know you are not submissive?

B. Submission is ordained

1 peter 2:13-15 “Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority, or to governors...”

Romans 13:1-7 “Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities.”

1 Peter 5:4-5 “ You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders”

1 Corinthians 16:16 “that you also be in subjection to such men and to everyone who helps in the work and labors.”

C. Submission (lack of) has consequences

Romans 13:2 “Therefore whoever resists authority has opposed the ordinance of God; and they who have opposed will receive condemnation upon themselves.”

D. Submission defined

It is a military = to arrange or rank under = relinquish your rights to another person, voluntarily yield to another

[Examples] team, school, marriage.

One another - the christian life.

E. Submission is difficult

Our EXPNC —> unrespectable superior, oppressive professor, being pulled over… —> spouse is being prideful yet sets down direction, you were not included, you are offended, …

WHY? SIN/PRIDE.

Pride means you are consumed with self-recognition, concerned about self preservation, controlled by your selfish desires, committed to self-serving pleasures, and you have compromised on the word of God.

“Pride seeks to ungod God.” - Thomas Watson

How do you know you are being prideful?

2. The MEANS

To have the spirit/heart of submission you need a humble DISPOSITION which results in loving DEEDS.

Humility is the attitude and love is the action // Humility is the posture and love is the pattern.

Obey command to love, impossible without humility.

What is love? Love that denies self and chooses the best of others.

1 John 3:16 “We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.”

Romans 12:10 “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor;”

What is humility? - to count my own joy and pleasure as less important than the joy and pleasure of someone else.

Humility before God

Matthew 5:3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”

Luke 18:9-14 “And He also told this parable to some people who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and viewed others with contempt: “Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. “The Pharisee stood and was praying this to himself: ‘God, I thank You that I am not like other people: swindlers, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. ‘I fast twice a week; I pay tithes of all that I get.’ “But the tax collector, standing some distance away, was even unwilling to lift up his eyes to heaven, but was beating his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, the sinner!’ “I tell you, this man went to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted.””

Humble before others - Philippians 2:3-4 “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”

Don’t you want to be a great? nobody wakes up…

Imagine the life giving, light shining marriage this is

Marriage = grace of life // God opposes; gives grace // humility is needed to EXPNX GOL. You can maximize and reap joy when you humble yourself and submit to noe another.

The necessary work of the HS

Born again

humbly submitting to the word of God Colossians 3:16 “Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you”

This bears fruit in attitude of humility and expresses itself in love.

3. The MOTIVE

Fear of the Lord is beginning of wisdom (Pro.9:10; Pro.1:7)

Macarthur says, “The fear of the Lord is a state of mind in which one’s own attitudes, will, feelings, deeds, and goals are exchanged for God’s

Fear here is the awe inspiring fact of WHO he is - Ephesians 1:22 “And He put all things in subjection under His feet, and gave Him as head over all things to the church,”

And the reverence for WHAT he did - Lord of all//servant of all Philippians 2:6-8 “who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”

mark 10:45 ““For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.””

Dreadfulness of defiance against Christ who will judges us 2 Corinthians 5:10-11 “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad. Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord...”

He assigns the authority

He is the standard

How do we grow in fear of Christ?

4. The MANDATES & MANNERS of marriage

How do you lay this foundation of mutual submission? How do you start it? How do you preserve it/cultivate it?

How does one grow in the area of submission?

How does a man live out mutual submission towards his wife but also lead her?

How does a wife submit to her husband when she does not agree?