Pentecost 20
October 29, 2000 Pentecost 20
Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, ‘‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” “What did Moses command you?” he replied. They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law,” Jesus replied. ‘‘But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. He answered, ‘‘Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”
People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, ‘‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them. Mark 10:2-16
These are Jesus’ Family Values
It’s been said that this is the most important election in our lifetimes. And I don’t know about you, but I’m getting pretty tired of it. I’m sick to death of attack ads on TV and I’ll be glad when it’s over. Having said that, I do think this election is important. In this campaign, there’s been quite a bit of talk about family values. You’ve all seen that commercial that says, “Al Gore, father of four ...” and the one for state representative that says, “He’s lived the family values others just talk about.” All those family values ads are aimed at people like us who think that marriage and family are important. People who believe that our leaders have a responsibility to be examples to our children. You are their target audience. Now, I’m not trying to tell you how you should vote, but I do think all those references to “family values” are meaningless. After all, whose family values do they represent? This morning, God holds out to us the only family values that matter. Not surprisingly, they’re values that our society would consider to be out-of-date, even radical. Few politicians would stand where Jesus stands today. But Jesus calls us to stand there with him. These are Jesus’ family values:
I. Jesus is anti-divorce.
II. Jesus is pro-child.
I.
The Pharisees were trying to sandbag Jesus. Kind of like when a reporter tries to trip up a candidate by asking him about something controversial, like gun control or abortion. Taking a stand one way or the other is going to cost him votes. The Pharisees figured they had a question that was going to cost Jesus. Now, he wasn’t running for anything, so it wouldn’t cost him any votes. But he was popular. And they wanted him to lose some of that popularity. So they asked him one of the most divisive questions of their time: was it legal for a man to simply divorce his wife? You have to understand what that question meant. God’s covenant with Israel included laws about marriage. When Israel was unfaithful to that covenant, she paid. Blood ran in the streets and the people were carted off to exile. No one wanted to be guilty of leading God’s people astray again. But there was a deep divide in Jewish society over this question. Some understood Moses to say that divorce really wasn’t permitted, except in very serious cases. Others felt that the law allowed divorce as long as the husband observed certain legal niceties, like giving his wife a certificate of divorce. The Pharisees tried to put Jesus on the spot. He could support one position or the other, but then he would have to call the other position wrong. Jesus didn’t disappoint them. He made a clear statement of his family values. He was anti-divorce.
But first Jesus asked the Pharisees what Moses had said. They answered, Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away. Either side in the Jewish argument would have agreed with that statement. They all argued that a husband could get rid of his wife, as long as he gave her a “certificate of divorce.” That really wasn’t what the law said. And it’s surprising, in a way, that the Pharisees held that position, since they were the “religious right” of their day. But the Pharisees really weren’t interested in the great truths of Scripture. They wanted to feel like they were righteous. They couldn’t feel that way because they couldn’t really follow God’s law. No one can. So they turned Moses’ commandment on its head and said, “It’s all right to divorce a woman as long as you follow the rules.” Jesus didn’t let them get away with that. Moses didn’t give the correct procedure for getting a divorce. He gave a law to protect women who were divorced in a culture that didn’t give them many rights. If a man broke God’s will and divorced his wife, then he had to give her a certificate of divorce. That certificate gave her the right to remarry. Under the Mosaic law, men and women who were caught in adultery were killed. So having a certificate of divorce was kind of like saying that your husband divorced you for “irreconcilable differences” instead of because you cheated on him.
But Moses wrote that law because Israel’s hearts were hard. God knew that some men would unjustly divorce their wives and he wanted to protect those women. But divorce was never a part of God’s plan for marriage. God’s plan is simple. One man and one woman leave their parents and become one flesh -- they join together in the most intimate union this side of heaven. And they stay that way for life. Divorce is just plain wrong. Can you imagine a politician saying that today? Everyone agrees that the rate of divorce in our society is horrible. The same psychologists who told us 30 years ago that “no fault divorce” was the best thing for kids in unhappy families have had to admit that divorce tortures children. But do they say that it’s wrong? No. Their answer is that we have to pay more attention to the kids when their parents get divorced. We have to understand what they’re going through. But you know what? Even if you could be so understanding that your children weren’t hurt at all, even if you never let the proceedings degenerate into name calling and spitefulness, even if both husband and wife want it and remain friends afterward, divorce is a sin.
“What God has joined together, let man not separate.” When a man and woman get married, first of all they make a promise to God. Before the promise to each other, to their parents, or to the state of Michigan, they promise God that they will live together. Because human hearts are hard, God does allow divorce in two specific situations: if your spouse -- not you, your spouse -- has sex with someone else or if your spouse just leaves. But even that’s a concession. If you get divorced for any other reason, you’re saying that your need to be happy or your desire to have something else is more important than the promise you made to God. That sin should be damned in hell. Divorce is part of American life today. It’s easy. It’s quick. Even many Christians are doing it. But before the members of our congregation who have never been divorced start shaking their heads at those who have, let’s remember that divorce is just the last step in the sinful destruction of a marriage. Every loveless word, every little argument or lack of attention to your spouse tears at the essence of marriage because it goes against the commitment you made. Divorce is the last horrible result of thousands of little sins snowballing down the mountain of your lives until there’s nothing left of that commitment. Even if you never reach that point of divorce, all those loveless words and actions were sins. They come from the same arrogance that divorce comes from. They dishonor the promise you made in the presence of God.
Jesus’ values are so absolute that we can’t even begin to live up to them. Our failure should condemn us all to hell. But Jesus has won forgiveness even for the sins of divorce and lovelessness and arrogance before God. Jesus always held marriage in the highest regard. He dealt in perfect love with every person he ever meant. That perfect love and honor of God and of marriage has replaced our lack of love, our arrogance, even our divorces. Jesus makes us perfect in God’s eyes because Jesus has taken away all those sins. When he died on the cross, he paid the full and complete price for every divorce that ever has happened or ever will happen. Jesus paid for every loveless word and action. He paid for every resentment of your spouse. He paid for every time we forgot the oath we took before the Lord and put our wants and our hurts before our marriage. His blood has run down from the cross and over our heads and washed us clean. No matter how many times we have broken or despised or ignored our marriages, we are forgiven. Jesus proved that by rising from the dead.
Now Jesus calls us to adopt his family values. But he calls us to do more than just accept his position. He calls us to live it. To love and honor and cherish our spouses, even when they don’t deserve it, because we swore an oath to God. And he makes that possible. The only way that you and I will ever honor our spouses and our God is through Christ. It’s through the relief that he gives when our hearts ache because we’ve broken that law of marriage so many times. Peace isn’t in trying harder. It’s in Jesus’ blood and his righteousness. It’s in the gift God gave us on the first Easter Sunday. It’s in forgiveness. Strength is in that forgiveness. And love for our spouses and our God. The Holy Spirit is working in you now. Trust his presence in the gospel and commit yourselves to Jesus’ family values. This is Jesus’ family value: he is anti-divorce.
II.
Family values are about more than just our marriages. Jesus was also concerned with how we raise our children. Some women were bringing their children to him so he could bless them. These women weren’t looking for some kind of superstitious touching by a famous healer. They weren’t looking for a politician to kiss their babies. They weren’t looking for something to brag about to their friends and neighbors. They wanted a real blessing because they believed in him. Their children did, too. Whether they understood everything about him or not, they realized he was the promised Savior. They wanted Jesus’ power and love and protection for their children. And Jesus wanted to give it to them.
But, of course, the disciples didn’t understand what these women did. Isn’t it ironic how often the people who spent the most time with Jesus understood him less then people who only saw him once or twice, but who had a simple trust in their Savior? The disciples started to chase those women and their children away. Jesus was an important man. He didn’t have time for a bunch of kids. But you know that he did. Jesus got angry at those foolish fishermen. He wanted those children to come to him because the kingdom of God belongs to “such as these” -- to people who share their simple faith. Jesus said, I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it. Jesus’ point is simple: children believe what they are told, because they trust the person who’s telling them. A Christian child’s faith in Christ is real. In fact, it’s a model for the kind of faith we grown-up Christians should have.
But their faith does need to be nourished. Jesus commanded his disciples to let them come to him. He might say it a little differently to us. To us, he might say, “Bring your children to me!” Or “Keep bringing your children to me!” Jesus wants our children to hear the gospel. He wants them to have that faith that he holds up to us as a model. He wants us to set them on his lap so that he can fold them up in his arms and bless them. He wants to guard them, to teach them, to bring them to live with him in heaven. That’s our greatest responsibility as parents. We Americans are very fortunate. Most of us don’t have to scrape to come up with enough money to feed our kids. Most of us don’t have to hope that someone will buy clothes for them. In fact, many of us agonize more over how many activities we should put them into. At Christmas and birthdays, we struggle over how much money it’s healthy to spend on them, not over whether we can afford to at all. But the curse in all that wealth is that soccer and music lessons and birthday presents seem so much more important to making our children happy than simply bringing them to hear God’s Word. But they aren’t. If we had a child’s simple trust in Jesus’ promises, we would know better. It’s only our “mature view of life” that worries about all those other things. Bring your children to Jesus. Bring them to Sunday School and Weekday School. Bring them to family devotions. Bring them back to their baptisms. Bring them. That’s why God gave them to you.
Is there any Christian parent who feels like he or she is doing all they should in this area? I doubt it, because we parents know better than anyone how sinful our children can be. When their nasty sinful natures come out or when it seems like all we’ve done today is punish and yell and threaten, we may feel like God should give them to someone else, because we don’t deserve them. Maybe we don’t. But God has given them to us. God has equipped us to bring them to him. First of all, he did it by paying for our sins, too. The same Jesus who wrapped those kids up in his arms and blessed them went to the cross to die for all our failings as parents. He died for the sinful nature in our kids that we can’t control and he died for the sinful nature in ourselves that sometimes forgets to show love and to share the gospel alongside all that law. He died for our screwed up priorities that allow other things to more important than bringing them here. Then he rose to say that all those sins are forgiven. Jesus wiped them out forever. We are now perfect parents in God’s eyes. We have been brought to Jesus. That’s what our children need, too. Bring them to Jesus, because you have been brought. Share God’s forgiveness with them because God has shared it with you. Show them what is truly meaningful in life: the gospel. Let the Holy Spirit lift them up and make them the people he wants them to be, because they know their Lord loves them. That’s Jesus’ family value: he is truly pro-child.
The election is almost here. In a little over a week, it’ll be history. We’ll see if the world changes. We’ll see if America gets any closer to God’s family values. But I won’t be holding my breath, no matter who wins. But no matter who wins, make Jesus’ family values, your family values. He’s anti-divorce. He’s pro-child. Live in love for your spouse and for your children. Reflect Jesus’ love for them. Amen.