How Can I Help? - PART 3

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Giving

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Giving out halloween candy tonight!

Soaking Service

Romans 14:1–2 NIV

Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters. One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables.

Humility check - how many times when we quarrel with someone, do we assume we’re the ones with the strong faith?

Later, Paul says

Romans 14:5 NIV

One person considers one day more sacred than another; another considers every day alike. Each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind.

So picture these two people

And let’s say they disagree on something. Maybe it’s related to serving God, maybe it’s related to how the church should run, whatever.

But you have these two people who are on seemingly opposite sides. Contradictory sides.

Paul uses food and special days as an example. One guys says DIG IN! The other one says, ‘nope, it’s WRONG to eat that kind of food!’ Likewise, one day says ‘this particular day is extra holy compared to other ones, I have to be different’ and another one says ‘hey, all days are great!’

And food and special days don’t seem like a big deal to us - but they were to them. So in this story, it’s two people saying, ‘this topic is important - and this is how I see it’ and they’re on opposite sides.

Let’s contemporize it. I’ve seen churches that say ‘music has to be this kind of music, this style, or else it’s wrong’. I’ve seen ‘you have to be behind a pulpit’, and i’ve seen ‘you shouldn’t be’. Church should be this long, or this short.

Or in our personal lives. We SHOULD send our kids out for halloween, or we shouldn’t. You should vote this way, or that way. You can listen to this kind of music, or you can’t. You should dress this way, or that way. The list goes on and on.

And paul is driving people towards answering a specific question here:

How do we handle differences between people who are trying to serve and honor God?

And here’s another way that we can learn to not be conformed to the pattern of this world. because what’s the first thing people do when they disagree? Gloves off. Let’s fight.

But Paul wants to draw our attention to how God’s priorities are different than ours.

Romans 14:3 NIV

The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them.

We can respond in contempt or judgment

Contempt here means, feeling like the other person is beneath you. You’re higher up, you’re closer to God, they’re not because they need some rule, some regulation.

But we can also respond in judgment - saying that, I’m right, and that person’s wrong. I’m doing the right thing God’s asked me to do, and they’re not doing it.

And paul says - scrap both those ideas

The first week, we talked about how God’s underlying motivation for accepting us was based on grace alone. And that still applies here.

And remember, this is in the context of ‘disputable matters’. Some things are crystal clear. Jesus is the only way to heaven. We’re accepted by grace alone. We need to serve God always. We can take a series of verses, and say, ‘without a doubt, this is exactly what this means’.

STORY - Someone asked a kid what does the bible say about honoring parents / siblings

But the bible hasn’t been super clear about every scenario. And that’s why we have a relationship with God, and regular communication with him.

And paul is saying, in that context - where we’re all trying to operate in the ‘not so specific’ - that grace is the first factor God considers.

Paul gives us two foundational beliefs to hold about working with others- but then he also lets us in on the heart of God and what GOD looks for.

The first belief is this:

God, in grace, has already accepted both parties

That again - if we believe that every single person who stands before God is there because of grace alone, there’s no space for judgment or contempt. We can’t push someone out or look down on someone - they’ve already been accepted.

So, our ‘quarrels’ so to speak aren’t about acceptance vs non-acceptance. They can’t be.

We need to make it our goal and our priority in each of those situations, to push for bringing the other person in no matter what. Preserving unity. Showing respect and love and caring. That God says, I want both of you, and so we need to be really active in pushing that in everything that we do.

But later, Paul pushes a second idea. He says this:

Romans 14:4 NIV

Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.

Furthermore, he says:

Romans 14:10–12 NIV

You, then, why do you judge your brother or sister? Or why do you treat them with contempt? For we will all stand before God’s judgment seat. It is written: “ ‘As surely as I live,’ says the Lord, ‘every knee will bow before me; every tongue will acknowledge God.’ ” So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.

So paul pushes this idea - they’re GOD’S servants. They’re trying to serve Him in what He’s asking them to do. And God’s allowed to do what He wants to do with people.

Paul even says, I know that all foods are clean. But we’ve done something wrong if God tells somebody to not do something, and we tell them TO do something, simply because WE think they have to.

We can’t allow our individual convictions to turn into a method to judge and condemn other people.

Likewise, if God has told someone one thing about a disputable matter, and you another - that’s God’s right.

We can’t look down on other people because they hold convictions in an area where we don’t.

So Paul’s second foundational belief is this:

People aren’t OUR servants - they’re God’s servants

Paul actually suggests, we could be making somebody stumble in their faith by forcing them to see it our way - because what if God told them to do it otherwise?

It takes great humility to be able to say ‘I’m going to consciously recognize that I’m not God here’. Even in situations where we’re doing literally what God told US to do.

Paul wraps this one up really bluntly later:

Romans 14:22 NIV

So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves.

He KNOWS that disagreement, especially when there’s the big issue of correctly serving God, can cause division. It can cause quarrelling. Because the answers to these questions are so important.

So he says - on stuff like this, if you have a personal conviction - honor it. But also keep it internal. For the sake of unity and peace. Because you never know when somebody else is serving God and He’s taking them totally different places than you.

it’s really easy for us to make this about us. I think this is the right thing, and others should as well. I think this is more honoring to God. I think this is more respectful. I think we have to do it this way, or God won’t be happy.

And the beginning of all of these things is simply this - ‘I think’. And that’s where we need to start leaving more space for God.

Now, I talked about earlier - what is it that God’s looking for? What’s HIS metric? Where’s the area where HE says, ‘I think this is good, and I think this is bad’. Paul gives us an interesting picture.

Romans 14:6–8 NIV

Whoever regards one day as special does so to the Lord. Whoever eats meat does so to the Lord, for they give thanks to God; and whoever abstains does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.

Paul covers the same kind of conversation in 1 Corinthians 10. Talking about food being sacrificed to idols - again, a big deal for them back then.

1 Corinthians 10:30–31 NIV

If I take part in the meal with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of something I thank God for? So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

So Paul says, if I do this thing that’s in the ‘not-so-clear’ category, and I’m giving thanks to God and praising Him - why should I feel denounced by others? If I’m giving glory to God in an area He’s told me to do so - why should another person condemn me?

So what is it God is REALLY looking to find in a person’s life?

God’s looking for people who are trying to give glory,honor and thanks to Him

This is God’s standard here. And this is what we should hold. Is this person trying to give thanks and glory and praise to God?

Because, believe me, there’s plenty of ways we can LOOK like we’re following Christ, but our hearts are not on the right track.

And there’s plenty of ways our hearts can be on the right track, and we don’t look the same as another person whose heart is ALSO on the right track.

So Paul says - that person who eats everything? They’re doing it and gving glory to God. That person who refuses on grounds that God told them to stop? They’re doing it and giving glory to God.

Two opposites, but the same heart intention - and that’s what God looks at.

Now, sidebar here - this doesn’t mean ‘Do whatever you want! It’s all good!’

This is all in the context of that phrase ‘disputable matters’.

Paul teaches that, the freedom we have in Christ isn’t license to engage in sinful behaviour because we’ll be forgiven.

Likewise, later in Romans Paul teaches that while we may have freedom, not everything is beneficial or constructive

Both of these are - are we OBEYING God, and are we trying to get CLOSER to God.

And furthermore, what right do we have to look at someone who is expressing thanks and praise, someone who is trying to point others to God in what they do, what right do we have to look at that person and say ‘Hey, you. Stop that.’

Paul calls this ‘putting a stumbling block in front of somebody’ - when we try to change someone and they are doing what GOD wants (giving him glory and praise), but not doing what WE want (doing it in a way that honors us and makes us feel better)

And maybe you don’t have a relationship with God - or you did, and you were burned out by a legalistic and rules-based community.

You are invited to a life of learning with us how to be closer with God.

God LOVES to see people trying to follow Him. Trying to learn more, and be more, and do more.

And he can give you strength when you’re weak, forgiveness when you fail, and grace when you don’t feel like you measure up.

Romans 10-15 please read along with us!

NEXT WEEK:

We have to be careful to be a compass and not a GPS

Because we’ve had a lot of the experience in navigating this issue of heart change. We know what it’s like to mean well, but be a bit off base practically. And likewise, i’m sure we’ve experienced what it means to do the same thing over and over so much that we have to learn to adjust to make sure our hearts stay in the right place

But be a compass, not a GPS. Help point people in the right direction - don’t dictate every twist and turn.

When we act like a GPS - all we do is trip people up.

DIRECTIONS - They aren’t the same if you don’t start in the same place.

If we can tell a person’s heart is in the right place, and their practice is a little off - great, that’s a wonderful start. Encourage that person. Help them to stay facing that direction. God will help them stand.

If we can tell a person’s having some troubles in the heart motivation side - gently come along side and help point them in the right direction. Help them learn to continually ask God the question, ‘what should I do now?’

But part of growing and being mature in faith is developing a good spiritual compass, and we can share that wisdom, that perspective with others. Help them to sharpen and develop their own.

And it may lead them to different - and opposite - places. But the important thing is - THEY’RE serving God too. And they’re developing THEIR compasses.