Servant Leaders

Termite walks into a bar and asks “Is the bar tender here?”

I remember when the shovel was invented. It was truly a groundbreaking creation.

Here about the pirate celebrating his 80th birthday? “I’m eighty”

Principal, Coach, Cop, Boss: When you think of that POSITION you likely think of a PERSON. In fact, the PERSON who served in that POSITION probably flavors the way you see that position.

If the person in that position was kind, consistent, cooperative, & fair…then you probably view the position in that way - principal, coach, cop, or boss.

BUT...If the person in that position was unkind, inconsistent, uncooperative, & unfair…then you likely view the position that way.

When you hear the position of DEACON what do you think of? "Deacon” is a word that means little to most folks, unless you have a church background or for some reason are a fan of the Wake Forrest Demon Deacons. On a side note, deacons aren’t supposed to be equated with demons…although I’ve heard stories about some who are.

Deacon comes from the Greek diakonos (a word transplanted from Greek to English - aka transliterated) and simply means servant. So if...

I SAY DEACON…YOU SAY SERVANT, DEACON….SERVANT….DEACON…SERVANT.

It might surprise you to know that the term “deacon” is used in the Scriptures for anyone who serves, not just for a person in the position of “deacon”.

For example, the verb tense of the word is used when John says, “Martha was serving.” (Jn. 12:2)

Look how this term is often translated in Scripture.

Mark 10:43–45 (NET)

…whoever wants to be great among you must be your servant [deacon], and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served [deaconed] but to serve [deacon], and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

As is obvious, I have asked our deacons/wives to join me on stage briefly so we could have some interaction.

GUYS (talking to DEACONS), let’s talk about how THE TERM “deacon” is used for a moment. We spent a good deal of time talking about this as we trained through this book. How did it impact you to see HOW OFTEN this term was used in the Scriptures?

The fledging position of DEACON within the church first occurs in Acts 6.

One of you DEACONS read it here.

Acts 6:1–7 (NIV)

In those days when the number of disciples was increasing, the Hellenistic Jews among them complained against the Hebraic Jews because their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food.

So the Twelve gathered all the disciples together and said, “It would not be right for us to neglect the ministry of the word of God in order to wait on tables.

Brothers and sisters, choose seven men from among you who are known to be full of the Spirit and wisdom. We will turn this responsibility over to them

and will give our attention to prayer and the ministry of the word.” This proposal pleased the whole group. They chose Stephen, a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit; also Philip, Procorus, Nicanor, Timon, Parmenas, and Nicolas from Antioch, a convert to Judaism.

They presented these men to the apostles, who prayed and laid their hands on them. So the word of God spread. The number of disciples in Jerusalem increased rapidly, and a large number of priests became obedient to the faith.

One of you explain the situation, the solution, what was at stake? (the UNITY of the Church).

Situation: Greek cultured Jewish widows were being forgotten and the apostles were having a give attention there instead of praying and preaching.

Solution: Find Godly men who would make sure the forgotten wouldn’t be forgotten any longer.

What’s at Stake: The unity of the Church as teetering.

Now, who would talk about the significance of how 21st century deacons might put this principal into practice. In other words, if everyone is getting fed in the church today, how might deacons protect the UNITY of the Church? (stop slander, encourage reconciliation, meet the needs of the weak within the church).

In the same chapter - Acts 6, we read of Stephen, one of those Godly servants who took care of those widows, being tried by the Sanhedrin (the Supreme Court of Israel who handed Jesus over to the Romans to be put to death). That trial did not end well as it led to servant Stephen being dragged out of the city and being stoned to death.

Saul - aka Paul - was applauding his death (Acts 8:1).

BUT...after Saul (aka Paul) surrenders to Jesus & take the Gospel all over the Roman empire, He calls on men like Stephen to shadow the overseers and and serve the Church (mentioned in 1 Tim. 3:1-7). Paul specifically addresses deacons in opening of his letter to the Philippians.

Philippians 1:1 (NET)

From Paul and Timothy, slaves of Christ Jesus, to all the saints in Christ Jesus who are in Philippi, with the overseers and deacons.

Notice how Paul names all the saints (all believers of the church), overseers (leaders), & then deacons. These are the men who specifically hold the position & responsibility of serving others inside the church family.

And while the characteristics we are going to look at (1 Tim 3:8-13) are EXPECTED for leaders in the church, how wonderful would it be if EVERY BELIEVER would strive to live these practices out!!!

Walter Payton and Jerry Rice were elite athletes who trained harder than anyone else. They ran steep hills and prepared during the offseason while others did the minimum amount of work to be ready when the season came.

But WHAT IF the whole team followed that same training regimen? With if everyone who wore the same jersey prepared during the offseason to play to the best of their ability during the season?

So while the characteristics we are about to discuss should be true of DEACONS, I want you to ask this simple question:

ARE THESE CHARACTERISTICS TRUE OF ME?

I’m going to let our deacons/wives go back to their seats while we pray.

PRAY

1 Timothy 3:8-9 (NET) Deacons likewise must be dignified, not two-faced, not given to excessive drinking, not greedy for gain, holding to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience.

Dignified: There is a respect, honor, restraint, virtue, temperance, and modesty that these men have. The work of a deacon requires him to be be sensible and steady.

Not two-faced: The literal Greek means two-tongued, deceitful in speech - manipulating & lying. The deacon however, is NOT to be deceptive in his language or actions. He is not a hypocrite - saying one thing and doing another OR saying one thing to one person and something different to the next. What he says he means & does. This is a good practice of ALL BELIEVERS - is it not?

Not given to excessive drinking (Greek - much wine). Excessive drinking leads to addiction, apathy, and abuse. It was the norm in their culture to drink wine, sometimes fermented & sometimes not (fresh grape juice). They didn’t have all the sodas, juices, & other drinks that we have access to. Water sources were sometimes polluted & the small alcoholic content helped make the use of water safe as well as add some taste. It seems that some believers stayed away from fermented wine entirely. Paul even commanded Timothy “Stop drinking just water, but use a little wine for your digestion and your frequent illnesses.” (1 Tim. 5:23)

In our context there is much confusion as to the significance of alcohol, as some churches even engage in drinking at church events. That will NOT happen here. We have too many other drinks that don’t cause people to act stupid. We can act stupid on our own without the help of alcohol. Does that Bible teach that believers should NEVER drink alcohol? NOPE. But it sure teaches to NEVER get drunk, never to allow anything to master us, never to cause confusion for an immature believer that might cause them to stumble.

Steve McHargue told the story - student looked confused.

Because of the confusion alcohol causes in our culture, we ask that DEACONS stay away from alcoholic drink entirely & encourage YOU to do the same. Here’s what I know - if you don’t drink, you’ll never get drunk.

Not greedy for gain: A deacon is never to use this ministry for dishonest gain. In serving other people, he might need to deliver money or goods to help, so it is imperative that he is trusted with money & stuff. So, as

Os Guinness says, “the deacon was not drunk on wine or money.”

Next, these servants are to be…

Holding to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience: These guys need to know WHY they believe WHAT they believe - solid followers of Jesus who understand the significance of the Scriptures, what they teach about WHO God is and what God says. Further, these men must be LOYAL to obey to the truths of Jesus as revealed in the Scriptures and will not be swayed by false teaching. In other words, they must have right beliefs & behaviors.

BIG QUESTION: ARE THESE CHARACTERISTICS TRUE OF ME?

1 Timothy 3:10 (NET) 10 And these also must be tested first and then let them serve as deacons if they are found blameless.

Being tested is more than a one time Q&A or written exam. These servant-leaders should already be living out these characteristics in their ordinary lives and found blameless. This does NOT mean they have never sinned; it means that they are blameless in regard to meeting the characteristics of 1 Tim. 3 - dignified, not two-faced, not given to excessive drinking, not greedy for gain, & holding to the mystery of faith with a clear conscience.

Here’s how that process works at Fellowship.

You help us nominate men who meet the 1 Timothy 3 standards.

Our current deacons will then prayerfully discuss the nominations, interview worthy nominees & their wives, & then present those found blameless to the church tentatively on Sunday, Dec. 5.

There will then be a 2-week vetting process for private conversations about any concerns regarding these nominees (with pastor or current deacons).

Afterwards, chosen men who will serve as deacons beginning in January 2022.

But before we nominate these men, there are some other factors to consider. Deacons’ wives should echo these characteristics too.

1 Timothy 3:11 Likewise also their wives must be dignified, not slanderous, temperate, faithful in every respect.

To be fair, there is some debate as to whether these women are female deacons - or deaconesses. One reason? Wives of overseers in 1 Tim. 3:2-7 are not referred to in this way and it seems strange to hold deacon’s wives to a standard that overseers wives are not. Secondly, the Greek word translated as wives can mean either “woman” or “wife.” Conservative scholars disagree whether this is referring to a position of deaconess (cf. Rom. 16:1-2) or wives of deacons.

Southern Baptist tradition has viewed this as deacons’ wives who are dignified, not slanderous, temperate, faithful in every respect. But, as always, we should desire to bend our beliefs to fit the Bible instead of bending the Bible to fit our beliefs. Are there such things as female deacons? We won’t attempt to tackle that today, but we will continue to research and rightly interpret what the Scriptures intend.

What there should be no debate about is that these godly servant-leaders (DEACONS) should have godly wives who serve beside them. The deacon’s wife must be ready to minister to other ladies, which will be more effective and keep her husband from being put in an awkward situation.

And now look how the deacon/servant-leader impacts his own household.

1 Timothy 3:12 Deacons must be husbands of one wife and good managers of their children and their own households.

This is the picture of a godly man, a servant who is leading his family well. The man’s wife and children are his best qualifications - his living resumé. What he leads & lives in the home has no choice but to overflow into the church.

There should be NO QUESTION that he is “a one woman man” (Greek). In fact, this is what the Greek phrase means.

Many have taken this to mean a divorced man can never serve in this position.

Did Paul mean that a overseer/deacon MUST be married? Because PAUL wasn’t married (1 Cor 7:1, 7) and there is no mention of Timothy or Titus being married.

Did Paul mean that a a widower can’t remarry and serve as a deacon? Doubtful.

Did Paul mean a man can’t be divorced? He could have said that very clearly, but he didn’t. Years ago us Fellowship folks used to get around this by giving a divorced man a different title - “yokefellow” - in short, he could serve alongside a deacon but could never hold the position of deacon.

But you see, Paul’s focus isn’t the deacon’s marital status, but his sexual purity.

Frank Hurst was a great example of a SERVANT among folks at Fellowship - a man who was divorced before turning from sin and trusting Jesus. This man trusted Jesus & married Ms. JoAnne (and now they are in heaven together). Frank and JoAnne impacted untold marriage relationships in the way the modeled the “one-woman man” marriage. And yet, Frank and others with a similar past, felt unworthy to hold the position of DEACON or servant-leader. Well, whether a DEACON or not - that man, like others I have come to know and love - SERVED people in the name of Jesus.

One of the most humble men who now serves as a deacon here was divorced BEFORE he ever surrendered to Jesus.

Boss Mulkey is man who has been faithful to his bride for over 30 years - a couple who is a great EXAMPLE to Tonya and I…and so many of you.

He is the spitting image of the definition that Kent Hughes writes of, saying:

Kent Hughes “He must be a one-wife man. No other woman can have his affections maritally, mentally, or emotionally. His wife ought to occupy his full horizon. He must love her as he loves himself…A one-wife man places his wife at the center of his heart.”

If the man meets these qualifications - dignified, not two-faced/tongued, not given to excessive drinking, not greedy, believing and behaving the truth of the Gospel, a one-woman man who leads his family well - he may hold the official title of DEACON, a servant-leader.

Let me say one more thing about this divorced deacon issue. I will stand before the Lord and give an account for what I teach. You don’t have to trust what I teach, but you WON’T stand accountable for my teaching. So you can be sure of this. It is with a clear conscience that I say it is biblically possible that a divorced man could serve as a deacon in this church.

1 Timothy 3:13 For those who have served well as deacons gain a good standing for themselves and great boldness in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.

Deacons serve an important tasks ministering to folks in our church & community:

visiting & calling the sick

helping meet financial needs, praying for those struggling

putting their hands to hard work to help meet real needs

help lighten the load for the overseers & teachers

and doing their best to protect the UNITY within the Body.

Our current deacons have served well and continue to do so, and thereby gain a good standing in the eyes of people & a great boldness in trusting Jesus and pointing others to Him. For example…

A couple of years ago when Ms. Mary Pulliam called me about Dale’s passing. I got one of our deacons and we b-lined it to see her. We were there when they took our dear brother’s lifeless body out of the room. We walked in and hugged her neck. That deacon then rode with Ms. Mary to the hospital. All of our deacons who were able met at the hospital and ministered to her and others for a couple of hours. The next day, 2 of those men mowed her yard. When she needed help moving some stuff out of the house, guess who showed up to help - DEACONS…including one who wasn’t a deacon…but really was and now is - Mark Mancil.

This is just a quick glimpse into how these servant leaders are caring for this BODY. They have served well and continue to do so, and thereby gain a good standing in the eyes of people & a great boldness in trusting Jesus and pointing others to Him.

At the end of this year, Fain Poppell & Steve Bass will be rolling off as our Deacons currently serve for 3 and sometimes 4 years.

As Fain & Steve step off for at least 1 year, they will continue to be servants, whether holding the title of “current deacon” or not. Well done brothers.

Today, you have the honor to and privilege to nominate up to 4 more servant-leaders who serve the body of Christ and beyond.

We ask that you PRAYERFULLY consider which men on this list meet these criteria and could serve in this way. Circle up to 4 names and get that back to us anytime this week - starting today through NEXT SUNDAY.

And may we also ask ourselves this question, this week:

BIG QUESTION: ARE THESE CHARACTERISTICS TRUE OF ME?

What if we all were striving to dignified, not two-faced/2-tongued, not slanderous not given to excessive drinking, not greedy for gain, holding to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience, temperate, & faithful? What if we all were completely committed to our spouses and good managers of our own households - leading our families to follow Jesus? What if we all did our best to maintain UNITY with the Body?

How might God use a church like that to impact a community like ours?

Let’s go find out!

If God is dealing with you or your need prayer, we invite you to contact any of our staff, deacons, or solid Christian friends.

Want to talk further? Please contact Jackie (850-673-1582), Justin (704-618-6144), Christy (673-9764), or another follower of Jesus soon!

Or call our deacons & wives:

You can turn in your nomination form today by placing it on the stage OR turn it into the office or any staff member through next Sunday.

Justin’s News

Today we will close by praying for these servants - our deacons/wives & for Justin and Rachel. Join me as we lay hands on them and their precious wives.

PRAY

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

What challenged or encouraged you from today’s teaching? (Look back over your notes and share!)

Read 1 Timothy 3:8-13. Take time to discuss the characteristics in this passage one by one.

Why are these qualities important not just for deacons and their wives, but for ALL followers of Jesus?

Pray for our current deacons & wives: Alan & Christy Androski, Steve & Debbie Bass, Tim & Joni Hughey, Mark & Dot Mancil, Boss & Amelia Mulkey, Jim & Derita Pinkard, Fain & Linda Poppell, Tom & Martha Waddail. Consider encouraging them face-to-face, or via text or note. Also, pray for God’s guidance for the next deacons/couples to serve.

Pray for one another this week. Consider texting or calling same sex believers to pray and share together this week.