Irritability

Good morning, welcome, please open your Bibles to 1 Corinthians 13.

Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7- Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Pray.

Story of Jonathan Edwards.

Daughter was easily angered and irritated.

I thought that she is a Christian.

“Yes she is, but the grace of God can live with some people with whom no one else could ever live.”

Do we not know people who are like this? Are we not like this?

Edwards noticed not only the sinfulness of his daughter, but the amount of strife that irritability can cause in any relationship, let alone a marriage.

This is our topic this morning, likely one that we are aware of in others, and if we are honest, we can see bits of in ourselves as well.

We turn our attention to our text. But we must begin with the context.

1 Corinthians 13- the wedding verses.

Paul is speaking of something other than marriage, or romantic relationship.

1 Corinthians 12-14 centers on the inter-relations in the local church.

Chapter 12- spiritual gifts, one body of many members

Chapter 13 begins with the importance of love prior to being defined in our verses.

Chapter 14 returns to the benefits of spiritual gifts in the building up and serving of the church.

This entire portion of Paul’s letter deals with how we, in the church, are meant to be in relationship with one another.

In the heart of the text is the definition of selfless, serving, agape love.

Reminded for Christians and that there are consequences for living apart from these instructions.

Love to be defined as: patient, kind, not envying or boasting, not arrogant or rude, not insisting on its own way, not irritable or resentful, not rejoicing at wrongdoing, bearing and enduring all things.

These descriptions ought to describe us, and our church.

Focus on a few descriptions, both the negative and the positive.

Not irritable, described in patience, bearing and enduring all things.

Here is our challenge for the morning- irritability is the opposite of love, and so we ought not to be irritable, but instead patient, bearing and enduring.

Recognize the challenge here- Culture of short fuses, thoughtless words and loud voices.

1. What is irritability?

Greek- paroxynō

English word- paroxysm- a sudden or violent outburst.

A paroxysm of laughter, or anger, or coughing.

This is the heart of irritability.

We can imagine this.

Same word used to describe Paul being provoked by the many idols in Athens in Acts 17.

When Paul states that agape is not paroxyno, he is stating that love is not prone to sudden and violent outbursts of anger.

It is not easily provoked.

What is it that leads to an irritable, easily provoked life that is so set against Paul’s idea of love?

Plans that get derailed.

Schedules that get messed up.

2. How is irritability destructive?

Rids us of self reflection and endorses judgement of others.

The problem is always outward- here is how this person has bothered me. They are the cause of my irritability.

We don’t take blame well.

Z hitting Lathey- She only wants to read and won’t play with me.

Even when we find ourselves clearly in the wrong, it’s quite easy to place blame outside of ourselves.

Irritability is an anti-God state of being.

What God calls us to be, at our core, is loving towards all.

Love the Lord your God, love others as you love yourselves. This is the root of being a Christ-follower.

The Spirit of God produces the character of God.

So what is the character of God when it comes to provocation?

Turn our attention to Nahum 1:2-3- The LORD is a jealous and avenging God; the LORD is avenging and wrathful; the LORD takes vengeance on his adversaries and keeps wrath for his enemies. The LORD is slow to anger and great in power, and the LORD will by no means clear the guilty. His way is in whirlwind and storm, and the clouds are the dust of his feet.

Give the context- Nahum is giving a judgement against Nineveh, the capital city of Assyria.

722 BC- Assyria brought an end to the northern kingdom of Israel.

Assyria continues to be a threat against the southern kingdom of Judah.

Thus, God warns of judgement coming against Assyria, and these words are meant to be a dire prediction for Nineveh and words of hope and comfort to God’s people of Judah. Nahum- Comfort.

Notice what is said of this coming judgement- Yes God is wrathful and avenging, but God is also patient and slow in anger, meaning not easily provoked.

Know this by example, Jonah had been sent approximately 100 years earlier to Nineveh and judgement had been delayed.

Why the listing of both attributes, patient and powerful?

Two ways of looking at both being listed.

First- God’s power displays His patience. It is because God is powerful that He is patient. We do not share God’s power over ourselves, and thus we do not share God’s patience.

Stephen Charnock- “Men that are great in the world are quick in passions, and are not so ready to forgive an injury, or bear with an offender, as one of a meaner rank. It is a want of a power over a man’s self that makes him do unbecoming things upon a provocation. A prince that can bridle his passions is a king over himself as well as over his subjects.”

Charnock goes on to write of God- “God is slow to anger because great in power. He can sustain great injuries without an immediate and quick revenge.”

Consider Ezekiel 21:3- ...and say to the land of Israel, Thus says the LORD: Behold, I am against you and will draw my sword from its sheath and will cut off from you both righteous and wicked.

This is one way that God’s power and patience are linked, but there is another understanding that is possible as well.

Perhaps they are listed together because a reader might doubt God’s power because of His patience.

God has done nothing because God is powerless to do anything.

Imagine the people of Nineveh thinking they can get away with anything because they have not experienced God’s power.

Charnock writes, “The prophet answers to the terror of one, and the comfort of the other, that this indulgence to his enemies, and not accounting with them for their crimes, proceeded from the greatness of his patience, and not from any debility in his power.”

Thus, through all of this, we find the quality of God that is to be followed in Christians- God is not easily provoked even when He has the power to destroy.

When we are easily provoked, when we are irritable and suddenly have an outburst of anger, we find ourselves living contrary to the character of God.

Such behavior is sinful, not Spirit-driven.

Irritability tears down those around us.

Stated differently, irritability spreads.

This can simply be seen by experience.

Putting the kids to bed. My irritation invites irritation in their own hearts.

Can also be seen biblically, especially in the Proverbs.

Proverbs 15:1- A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Proverbs 15:18- A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.

In fact, we even have a warning given.

Proverbs 22:24- Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man...

Why not befriend such a person? Because of the impact it will have on our own lives.

Irritation is a great danger because of the impact that it has on those around us.

3. How is irritability to be conquered?

Trying harder simply doesn’t seem to work.

Consider a cup of coffee.

If coffee spills out, it is because coffee is what’s in the cup.

If irritability comes out when we are jostled, it is because irritability is what is inside.

We cannot try harder with what is inside if what is inside is broken.

Like washing dishes with dirty water.

We need something to fix the brokenness from outside of us.

Pray, Pray, Pray.

Pray extensively for those who irritate you.

Peter Miller, baptist pastor, friends with General Washington during the American Revolution.

In the same town, Michael Wittman, a man who disliked Peter Miller and did everything in his power to annoy, irritate and frustrate the pastor.

Arrested for treason.

Miller traveled 70 miles on foot to Philadelphia to plead for Wittman’s life.

Washington- I cannot allow your friend to live.

Miller says he is my bitterest enemy.

Washington allows Wittman to live, and he returns home with Miller as good friends.

It will become more difficult to be irritated by those over whom you have been praying.

Get involved in their lives. Begin asking them how you can be praying for them. Value them as God’s creation.

Pray extensively for your own heart.

Remember, irritability in our hearts is a big thing, because it is the opposite of love.

Pray extensively for the hearts of those you love.

Recognize the destructive nature of irritability within the church and do battle against it by praying for others.

The same irritability that flows through my life can also be found in my children. It is time to go to the Lord on their behalf as well as mine.

Closing thought- If you don’t find irritability to be such a big deal, or if you don’t think it is much of a struggle for you, or if you simply have no desire to conquer this sin, ask yourself one final question- If God adopted your level of irritability, how would He deal with you? Or me? Or any of us?

2 Peter 3:9-10- The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance. But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, and then the heavens will pass away with a roar, and the heavenly bodies will be burned up and dissolved, and the earth and the works that are done on it will be exposed.