Marriage | Disciple series

Matthew 5:27-37

Notes

Appointing Peter as an Elder.

If you missed the family meeting you missed one of the biggest and most important announcements we have ever made. It is regarding helping persecuted Christians from Afghanistan. Any of our leaders have access to the recording. If you are home group leader, spouse, co-leader… lead worship at a home group, host a home group will you stand? These are people you can get the link from. It is not to be shared outside our church.

Preface: We are talking about divorce today. I just want to preface our conversation today:

1. We have counseled dozens of couples over the years in marriage. I am not talking about you. None of my stories or examples today reference you. All of our marriages need work, mine not excluded. Welcome to the party, pal. One of our great principles of premarital is “always be working on your marriage.”

2. It is impossible for me to speak to your exact situation so please extend me grace and assume I am not speaking to the complexity of your exact situation of which I likely know little or nothing about. Many if not most marriage situations are complex and need individual counsel. Me and Janna our any of our elder’s and their wives, Riveras, Fanais, Pickards (they lead many of marriage ministries), or Sarpongs.

3. I think we will all finds Jesus’ teaching on marriage convicting… that seems to be the theme of the sermon on the mount does it not? If you are convicted, if you have messed up, if you have failed… just know the grace of Christ through the cross is greater. Grace, forgiveness, and life in the Messiah. But the answer isn’t hiding our mistakes, ignoring them, but throwing ourself into His merciful arms. Amen!?

Opener

“In a letter to The Times on 14 July 1983, Jack Dominian expressed his conviction that society is witnessing "a profound change in the nature of marriage." It is changing from "being primarily a permanent contract, in which the children and their welfare were its main concern, to a relationship intended to be permanent, in which companionship, equity and personal fulfilment are becoming just as important as the welfare of children." Dr. Dominian was too polite to call this shift in perception by its proper name "selfishness". But surely that is what it is. If each partner comes to regard marriage as primarily a quest for self-fulfillment, rather than as an adventure in reciprocal self-giving through which parents and children grow into maturity, the outcome is likely to be bleak. Yet it is this self-centered attitude to marriage which is being put forward by many today.” John Stott, 1984

Guys that was written by John Stott in 1984, the year I was born. I am 37. If that was true then it 10 times that today. Not only in our day do people continue to make marriage about themselves but they have redefined marriage and relationships in unimaginable ways. 1 and 6 18-23 year olds identify at LGBTQ etc. We are not only redefining marriage now we are redefining gender… the list goes on.

Is introspection of self and personal desire the best way to find ones calling and purpose?

I am going to argue today that there are better, wiser, and more sure ways at arriving at truth and Jesus is at the center of it all.

Main Text

Matthew 5:27–30 (NASB95) 27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’; 28but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 “If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 “If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell. 31”

Point 1 | A Radical View of Marriage

Hyperbole

Adultery of the heart. Jesus is an exclamatory teacher full of hyperbole. Everybody intuitively understands when he says pluck out your eye or chop off your hand he is exaggerating to make a point. This is obvious because physically harming yourself won’t stop you from sinning. It is an issue of the hearty primarily (another teaching of Jesus’). Chopping off your hand is almost a guaranteed way to die by the way and that was even more so back then. What is Jesus saying? He is saying be radical in dealing with sin. Do whatever it takes to cut sin out of your life. We often when dealing with sin don’t make any changes in our life and expect different results. We are the proverbial dog that returns to its vomit. Paul would nicely sum of this teaching at the end of Romans 13 sayinh:

Romans 13:14 (NASB95) 14 make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts.

So I don’t think Jesus is saying lusting after someone other than your spouse is a legal definition of adultery. We will unpack this idea more later. But what he is saying is this is sin against God and man. This is something that not only leads to the crime of adultery but is a crime in and of itself. This is a violation of the marriage covenant and makes you a law breaker before a Holy God.

Desire not Lust

Now I want you to understand two things about Jesus statement here. Jesus is using a word that has broader implications than how we use the word “lust”. The word simply means “desire”. This is really important. This means it would have been wrong to desire another woman to be your wife for any reason. I am speaking from the male’s perspective for a reason. Their cultural context and the Law of Moses gave men much greater lateral on this topic. A woman more or less didn’t have the right to divorce. Now she had rights that were protected in regards to her well being, basic needs, right to marital relations, and other rights to remarry if divorced as well as financial restitutions.

But more interesting than that is that polygamy was legal under the Law of Moses. Its most extreme forms were curtailed but it was allowed. As Matthew Henry points out regarding some of the marriage laws in the Old Testament, applying Jesus’ principle, it was because of their hardness of heart. Sometimes the law was their to restrain evil more than to promote the ideal. But understand Jesus didn’t see the Law as just the Sanai covenant but including Genesis where you do get the ideal.

So the implication of this passage right here in the sermon on the MT does something very interesting in Jesus’ day. It for all practical purposes calls polygamy sin. It also calls desiring to divorce and remarry sin. Think about it. If you are not just lusting after someone… but desiring another woman for any reason… simply desiring her in your heart you are adulterer of the heart. Because of how broad Jesus’ statement was the implications would forbid desiring anyone who isn’t your spouse for any reason. This for all practical purposes make polygamy virtually impossible.

But Jesus goes further than this. After addressing the Pharisees in public and dropping the Genesis bomb on them, “They are no longer two but one,” he speaks to his disciples in private and says:

Mark 10:11–12 (NASB95) 11 And He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; 12 and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery.”

This is an amazing statement concerning the law. Now it is important to know most Jews were monogynous. Most Jews didn’t practice polygamy. You had to be extremely wealthy. It wasn’t practical. But the latitude in being joined to multiple wives was there legally in the Sanai covenant. Jesus says not so fast. If you are joined to one you can’t be joined to another. And if you divorce the first that legal declaration doesn’t change God’s declaration. You are still committing adultery.

A Woman Divorcing?

Jesus statement in verse 12 is perhaps the most unusual in their day:

“if she… divorces her husband.”

A Jewish woman in Jesus’ day did not have this right. But in Rome where this Gospel was potentially written did have situations where the wife could divorce the husband (thou less common than visaversa). The Apostle Peter, historically the author or at least authority, behind Mark’s penning of the Gospel is likely extrapolating this for his audience. Liberals of course don’t get excited about Jesus’ equality of the sexes here because He is equally condemning. He is saying divorce and remarriage, either way, is adultery. Now this isn’t all Jesus says about it. He has much more to say. But I want you to see that in. Jesus’ day and throughout history man’s view of marriage and divorce were different than God’s view of marriage and divorce. Do you think it is possible that some of our thinking could be more informed by culture, experience, and earthly wisdom than God? I do. It has always been that way friends.

Cover Fire for Sin

I also want you to see that the religious leaders of Jesus’ day were challenging Jesus on this. And if you want religious cover fire for your sin you can find it. You want to have sex before marriage? You can find some pastor somewhere that will tell you that is fine. You want to be in a same sex relationship you can find plenty of pastors somewhere that will let you. I just heard of a new group recently that believes in celibate same sex unions…. If people want their sin they will find a way. And if you want to get divorced for any reason you can find some pastor somewhere that will support you. I want to make an appeal to those who find some of these modern views of marriage, sexual unions, and progressive relationships appealing. What do you want? What are you looking for? What are you desiring after? if you want Jesus He will often lead you down the path of self-denial. And Marriages are built on self-denial. It is literally the calling in Christ for the Christian husband. Christ doesn’t say come follow me and I will give you a 1,000 virgins… that’s Islam appealing to man’s sin nature. What is the calling for the believing Husband in Christ? Lay down your life just like Christ did for the church. Self -denial.

Sacrificial Love, Not Selfish Sin

So understand when the religious leaders of Jesus’ day pushed the popular belief that you could divorce for any reason what was at the heart of that? Selfishness and sin. And Christ standing opposite that calls us to something greater. He calls us to Himself. The God who didn’t kill Adam, the God who long suffered in the days of Noah and spared the human race, the God who lived through the cycle of sin in the days of Judges, the God bared with Israel through their going after false gods. The God who still didn’t give up on them even when He had exiled them. And as a faithful husband he wasn’t done yet. While we were yet sinners He died for us. He laid down His life for His bride. And the call of Christ is this:

Deny yourself pickup your cross and follow Him. And while the cross is death. And the sacrifice is great. It is worth it… because that is where the life is. It is better to give than to receive. Anyone who loses their life for His sake will find it.

In sacrificial love is where we really live. Sin and selfish ambition destroys relationships but sacrificial love builds and binds them together.

The call of Christ for marriage isn’t just a higher call of righteousness and it is that. It is also a higher call of mercy. We hunger and thirst for righteousness in our marriages and we be merciful as our heavenly Father is merciful. It is a both/ and. Our marriages must, in Christ, rise to higher standards of both integrity and holiness… and they must be abounding in mercy, forgiveness, and sacrificial love.

We must look at marriage not through a broken world, not through the very real problems that surround us, but through the eyes and the heart of the Messiah. And in that we will see a better way.

We must to the best of our ability step into the world of the NT, sit at the feat of Jesus and say “Teach me!”

Point 2 | Holiness in Marriage

Matthew 5:31–32 (NASB95) “It was said, ‘Whoever sends his wife away, let him give her a certificate of divorce’; 32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Progression of Man’s Sin

Jesus isn’t giving permission to divorce in this passage. He is simply saying that you are not making your wife commit adultery if the reason for the divorce is “πορνεία” that is “sexual immorality”. In other words if she has already committed adultery you are not forcing her to by divorcing her for she has already violated the covenant. In other words Jesus is calling men who desire women not their wives adulterers, men who marry divorced women adulters, and on top of that he saying you are guilty of the adultery you force her to commit by divorcing her as well (understanding she had to no choice but to remarry)… but he is making one abvious caveat. You are not guilty of this is the wife herself is guilty of “πορνεία” that is “sexual immortality.”

But the main point is this… there is a progression in the man’s sin:

“Not only is the focus on the man in this passage, but there is a progression in the seriousness of the man’s sin. It begins in the man’s mind (“adultery … in his heart”), develops in his eyes, and then moves to his hand. Next it becomes adultery by proxy (“causes her to commit adultery,” ESV), and finally he commits adultery himself by marrying a divorced woman.[1]” – Gordon J. Wenham

Speaking to Men

Jesus’ primary emphasis in these passage is toward men. He says “everyone who looks at a woman”… obviously referencing men. Only Jewish men could divorce their wives. A wife couldn’t divorce her husband. Now in extreme circumstances where she is denied basic rights she was free to leave (see Exodus 21:11). So this wasn’t empowering men to abuse women. They had protection under law and it was radical for its time period. But I want you to see as well in verse 32 that not only the “man” who marries a divorced woman commites adultery but the man who unlawfully sends her away makes her commit adultery. In otherwords Jesus puts the responsibility back on the man.

Men you must lead in your marriage. When Eve sinned first in the garden who did God call out to? Adam. You must take responsibility for your marriage. You must lead in nurturing and growing your marriage relationship. It will always take two to tango, but you must lead the dance.

The crime here is sending your wife away and divorcing here. What is supposed to be happening “clinging”. Becoming “one” as Genesis and Jesus command. I want to be really clear on this today men it is not enough to not send away or not divorce. You must cling to. You must pursue.

Pursue Your Wife

A big part of this is pursuit of your wife.

- Adam was called to leave and cleave to His wife.

- Proverbs 5 says to:

o Rejoice in the wife of your youth. That doesn’t mean rejoice when she is in her youth but rejoice in your first wife. Don’t go looking for something else. And this instruction came from a serial adulterer.

o Let her breast satisfy you at all times.

o It says, be intoxicated always in her love.

New Heart

And if you go reed this passage it is fascinating. It is the adulterous woman whose lips drip honey yet whose end is bitter as wormwood. But the answer is not to acceticism. The answer is not cutting off your hand or anything else. The answer is heart surgery. You need a new heart. Not one that is under the bondage of sin.

Romans 7:18 (NASB95) 18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not.

Only Jesus can do this for you. Only the cross of Christ can crucify that sinful flesh and raise you to knew life. But your are going to have to decide am I willing to let go of that sin in my heart. Am I will to take that straying heart to the foot of the cross and say crucify it Lord. And trusting in the powerful work of Jesus that can save us from the body of this death and give us reserection life you can forgive, love, serve and pursue your wife.

The answer then to lusting after other women. The answer to adultery. The answer to desiring divorcing and marrying someone else is putting to death those desires and with that new heart that only the King of The Kingdom can give pursuing your wife. Being intoxicated with her. Rejoicing in her.

Will to love

And friends it is choice and a will to love. You may say I just don’t feel like it. Well I am sure when Jesus was getting whipped, beaton, and mocked by the soldiers he didn’t feel like loving us either. But He did it anyways. And here is the amazing thing anyways… feelings are unreliable. If you let feelings lead you I don’t believe you would have gotten out of bed this morning and made it to service this morning. What is it that makes you go to work each day. Is it feelings? Feelings are good but they must not be the engine that drives our marriage. The will to love and pursue our wives must be at the front. And let me let you in on a little secret. The feelings will follow.

Singles

There was a Barna poll done in 2016 and 65% of americans polled thought cohabitating before marriage was a good idea. Living together before marriage. And of those people polled do you know what their reasoning for this was. 84%, nearly everyone polled, had one really simple reason for this…. Can you guess what it was: To see if they were compatible.

Perfect Compatibility is NOT the goal of marriage. Take two different individuals, two different genders, and two different family backgrounds compatibility is going to be a challenge. And the idea that the closer you get to perfect compatibility the better is just completely wrong motivation. Think about it. Who would be the person on earth you would be most compatible with taking into account age, gender, sex, and upbringing. It would be a sibling similar in age and same in gender. The very person God has designed for you not to marry. The person in this world you statistically would be the most compatible with is the last person on earth you should ever consider marrying isn’t that interesting.

God has designed marriage to take two people that are different and to bring them together for his glory. Half of marriage is learning to love someone completely different than yourself. And if you will humble yourself and joyfully embark on this journey you will find that at its heart is sacrificial love. That it is better to give than to receive. In laying down your life you will find it. And you will find in denying yourself and living with this person so different than you that you are being hoaned into the image of God. You will find that Christ is making you more like Himself and that He through you is fulfilling the very thing marriage was made to do. Reflect the image and glory of God!

So 65% percent of americans think it is a good idea to cohabitate most of them because they want to find out if the yare compatible. But check out this other statistic. According to the US Census beraue the number one cause for divorce, as cited by those getting divorced, in America is incompatibility. Perhaps incompatibility is a code word for selfishness. I am not getting things my way. I am not getting my expectations met.

We live in a day and age when we want to introspect our feelings and desires and derive truth, meaning, and purpose from fulfilling those desires we find deep inside of us. Sounds nice doesn’t it? But if you have a biblical wordview you understand that thing inside of you could be sin. It could be the flesh. It could be “O wretched man that I am”. And we don’t want that dictating our future and calling. So Jesus has a better way. And as the Creator He knows perfectly what you need and are called to. And its not based on the subjective wims of man but the objective purposes of God.

Praise God. Praise the author of marriage. His ways are true and right and holy and loving and merciful. Amen!

Will you be god of your own life and dictate your future. Or will you humble yourself under the mighty hand of a loving Creator.

Point 3 Grace in Marriage

The Great Debate Hillel and Shammai

This is a hard a teaching. It was insanely hard in their day. There was a debate going on in Jesus’ day over the meaning of Deuteronomy 24:1 and the grounds for divorce.

Deuteronomy 24:1–4 (NASB95) 1 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, 2 and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another man’s wife, 3 and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, 4 then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God gives you as an inheritance.

The debate in Jesus’ day was over what does “some indecency in her” mean. There were two views. William A Heth explains it this way:

“The specific ground for divorce mentioned in verse 1—literally, “a matter of indecency” (ʿerwat dābār)—was the point in dispute among the followers of the Jewish teachers Hillel and Shammai during Jesus’ ministry. In fact, when Jesus was asked by some Pharisees, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” (Matt. 19:3, emphasis added), they were asking him if he agreed with the popular Hillelite view encapsulated in the phrase “for any and every reason.” Followers of Hillel placed no limits whatsoever on the Jewish husband’s unilateral right to divorce his wife. The Shammaites, on the other hand, focused on the word “indecency” in the phrase in Deuteronomy 24:1 and limited the husband’s right of divorce to “adultery.”[2]”

The first thing I want you to notice is this:

1. The certificate of divorce was to protect the woman. The penalty of adultery was death in the Old Testament.

2. The intent of the law, verses 1-4 of Deuteronomy 24, was to stop a form of prostituting one’s wife for financial gain. Sexual immorality and adultery was wrong but you can’t have a loop whole with divorce and remarriage. Oh I divorced her and then we marry her to you, then you divorce her and give her back etc. It was stopping that.

The more popular of the two views between Hillel and Shammai was Hillel, divorce for any reason. Jesus disciples would have likely been under that influence. But Jesus not only takes the conservative position he corrects that position as well.

Matthew 19

We are told by scholars that Shammai actually required divorce in cases of adultery. Jesus goes toe to toe on this controversial topic in Matthew 19. The pharisees come and say, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?” (Matthew 19:3). Jesus emphatically says “no” more on that in a minute… but they immediately come back to this passage in Duetronomy 24 and say “why did Moses command to give her a certificate of divorce and send her away” (Matthew 19:7). Jesus correct this by saying, ““Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.”

Permitted not commanded. The Shammai view was wrong as well.

So if you will try and set aside what you know and think about divorce from your upbringing, from culture, form experience if possible just for a minute. And step inside the shoes of a disciple here in Matthew gospels.

Most good, religious Jews believed a man could get divorced for any reason. Some believed there had to be sexual immorality. Divorce was common and prevelant and everyone believed it was required at some compacity. Jesus comes in and says everybody is wrong! EVERYBODY is wrong. And so extreme was this teachings that in Matthew 19 the disciples are going to say, well its better not to marry then.

Exceptions

The exceptions

Now I want to point out that Jesus has two exceptions in Matthew the one in chapter 19 makes it clear that whoever divorces his wife for immorality, and marries another is NOT committing adultery. Jesus did something similar in our verse in chapter 5. A man who divorces a wife for immorality does not cause to commit adultery. In other words we don’t put the tag of adultery on the victim of divorce. I think Jesus is careful to make these exceptions because He is careful not to condemn the innocent. And we must not either! So in all the wratching things up and confronting every belief on divorce in His day He is careful not to go too far. And we must not either. The early church, in church history over the next 3-400 years will rapidly grow toward asceticism going as far to forbid priest to marry and forbid all remarriage after any divorce. I think the beauty of Jesus teaching is that it is just. As high and untenable the original disciples believed it to be it was still JUST. And we must not become unjust by condmening the innocent parties.

GRACE GRACE GRACE

But friends Jesus’ words and his actions but be seen like two wings of the airplane. You must take both into accounts.

- Matthew 1 oppens up with a geneology of the messiah that includes two adulterers, one with her own father, a prostitute, and a foreign and typically foribeen wife. Matthew Gospels points this out. Not to mention Mary, though innocent, was more or less accused of being immoral as well. This Gospel of Matthew wants you to know this is where the MESSIAH is coming from.

- Unclean woman in Matthew 9:20. He stops helping a wealthy benefactor to minister to her.

- Woman with the alabaster vial that anoints the head of Jesus. Or the many other women in other gospels… like the adulterous woman of John 8 or the Samaritan woman of John 4. The prostitute of Luke 6.

And do you know what Jesus offers at every turn! Grace! Grace, forgiveness restoration. Jesus is doing something in the Sermon on the Mount. He is pealing back the vale and showing sinful man just how high the standards of God’s righteousness are! I believe Jesus in this chapter in particular is on a mission to shut up all in disobedience so that He may show mercy to all.

You see we like grace without righteousness. We like a grace that says its going to be okay. Don’t worry about it. But Jesus isn’t offering therapeutics. He is offering solutions to your sin problems. He is offering grace that will deal with your unrighteouness. Grace that will actually forgive you before a holy God. And so extravigent was this grace that the messiah himself would come from a lineage that has sexual immorality intwined in it.

Do you think Jesus can redeem the sexual immoral! Oh He can! DO you think Jesus can mend the broken marriage? Even when adultery or worse is present? He can! He does! He has done it! And He will do it again.

That’s not to presume you can control the other person. One of the hardest things about marriage is you can only control you. In fact controlling the other person is bad leadership at best and often sin and much more at worst. But you can always do your part. You can always cling to the messiah. You can be merciful and forgiving even when the other person isn’t. You can be faithful even when the other person isn’t. and you can be exstravagent in your mercy and forgiveness. There are times when the other person shows no remorse, no repentance, and no change. Again just like our Lord we must not condemn those who are the innocent party when it comes to adultery. They have rights in this situation. But looking at the messiah they also have the right to walk in His footsteps and lay down their rights. We must not create a culture in the church where divorce is demanded. But with wisdom, patience, and truth we walk in Jesus’ footsteps.

Lastly all of us our offenders and all of us need grace. We must remember that we are sinners saved by grace. We are spiritual adulterors. We our guilty not only of not loving God like we were created to do we are guilty of idolatry and putting other things before God. Every adult in here today is worthy of death for our sin. Think about that in light of the context of our conversation today. If grace doesn’t reign in a marriage you are only going to have at best a pretense of a relationship. Grace to forgive, grace to love when we don’t feel like loving, grace to serve and live sacrificially, grace to be honest and truthful. Grave to change and grow. We are desperately in need of a Savior and our marriages are desperately in need of Savior. Every marriage not some marriages but every marriage.

The answer then it to be recipients, to grow in grace, and to exstend grace as we have received. That makes for a healthy marriage.

Where do we go from here

I do want to say this in recap.

1. There were always protections for the well being and safety of women. We need to be champions of that especially in matters of legitimate safety and harm.

2. Jesus is raising the bar and getting to the heart of matters. These teachings are meant to be challenging. They are meant to show us our sinfulness and our desperate need of a Savior. They are also there to show us the standard, that also by God’s grace, we are to live at in Christ. Extreme grace and forgiveness and extreme grace as empowerment to keep our covenants.

3. While Jesus is an absolute recking ball toward the thinking on divorce in his day He does not condemn the innocent party for divorce and remarriage in cases of adultery.

4. There are lots of situations I did not mention nor do we have time to get into them today, but generally speaking, and this is true in our day just as it was true in Jesus’ day, men and women look for excuses to get what they want. Most of these divorces and certainly the ones around compabtability are sin against God and ones spouse.

5. If you feel condemned today know that Jesus came to save people just like you.

We need to be our brothers and sisters keeper in this matter. Relationships today, including marriage, have become your own personal business. And you can run and find the counsel you want that will meet your desires. I just want to say we don’t want to be a church that makes everything about ones individual happiness. We want to be a church that pushes each of us toward Christ. Both His righteousness and His mercy. There isn’t a perfect answer for every situation but there is a perfect Savior. And at the end of the day our goal for each other needs to be that we honored the one who died for us. The one whose throne we must appear before. And God forbid that we promote someones personal happiness over what will be required of them on that day when they stand before Christ, Amen!

So its really quite simple. Let your yes be yes and your no no. Keep your word and keep your covenants.

[1]Wenham, G. J. (2006). No Remarriage after Divorce. In M. L. Strauss & P. E. Engle (Eds.), Remarriage after Divorce in Today’s Church (p. 28). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan. [2]Heth, W. A. (2006). Remarriage for Adultery or Desertion. In M. L. Strauss & P. E. Engle (Eds.), Remarriage after Divorce in Today’s Church (pp. 63–64). Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.