Wise Words November 24, 2021

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Introduction

The book of Proverbs recognizes the importance of our words by addressing this subject approximately 150 times in 915 verses (one-sixth of the book).[1]

The power of words

Words have extraordinary power. With only a few short sentences Abraham Lincoln gave the Gettysburg address inspiring a nation and propelling them towards winning the civil war
With countless words of hate and passion Hitler drove the German people on a mission of destruction in the world he painted with his words.
John F Kennedy laid a vision putting a man on the moon with his famous speech and even after his death the nation was driven to accomplish this task.
Osama bin Laden sent videos, messages, and inspirations throughout the Middle East galvanizing fighters who participated in 9/11.
Words don't just shape countries they shape individual, normal lives as well don't they?
The kind of words you say defines your success in your job.
The kind of words you say define your capacity to live a life with a lot of lifegiving friends.
That kind of words you say determines your capacity to maintain healthy family relationships.
There is a story of an old king who asked his servant to bring in the most dangerous thing in the Kingdom. The servant returned shortly with a human tongue on a platter. The king also asked the servant to go and find down the most valuable thing and again the servant returned with a human tongue on a platter. Our words have great destructive and great constructive capacity.
In truth if we can learn to use words with wisdom we can win souls for eternity, we can build healthy strong successful lives on earth and we can raise amazing kids and find success in our careers.
The stakes are high with this topic
Proverbs 18:21 ESV
21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.
Proverbs 11:11 ESV
11 By the blessing of the upright a city is exalted, but by the mouth of the wicked it is overthrown.
And that God holds such a high view of words that he reveals himself to us through words doesn't he?
2 Timothy 3:16–17 ESV
16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.

The limit of words

Now, obviously words have a limit.
In fact, proverbs warns us about this
Proverbs 14:23 ESV
23 In all toil there is profit, but mere talk tends only to poverty.
And of course James warns us as well
James 1:22 ESV
22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.
We must put action to go along with our words. Words alone are not enough. In proverbs reminds us that for fools especially words are not enough.
Proverbs 10:13 ESV
13 On the lips of him who has understanding, wisdom is found, but a rod is for the back of him who lacks sense.

The source of words

It's fascinating you can really tell the sense of sub someone's character by their words can't you. Words reveal the contents of your heart.
Proverbs 15:2 ESV
2 The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.
Proverbs 10:31 ESV
31 The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but the perverse tongue will be cut off.
Even Jesus spoke about this:
Matthew 12:34 ESV
34 You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.
Proverbs 4:23 ESV
23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.
Proverbs makes a clear case that if you watch over your words you will find extraordinary success in this life. But it also shows us that there’s a direct link between the words we say in what’s in our heart. If we change our hearts we will change our words and if we change our words we will change our hearts.

The destruction of words

Now as you know words can also be quite destructive
Proverbs 11:9 ESV
9 With his mouth the godless man would destroy his neighbor, but by knowledge the righteous are delivered.
Proverbs 16:27 ESV
27 A worthless man plots evil, and his speech is like a scorching fire.
Here are some examples of words that destroy

-Flattery

Proverbs 29:5 ESV
5 A man who flatters his neighbor spreads a net for his feet.
Proverbs 2:16 ESV
16 So you will be delivered from the forbidden woman, from the adulteress with her smooth words,
Flattery is dangerous isn't it? When you offer insincere praise to someone you either insult them or lie or you miss guide them. Or you use your words to manipulate someone into giving you something that you want. We need to speak with love for others

-Lies

OK what's more selfish than lies?
Proverbs 26:28 ESV
28 A lying tongue hates its victims, and a flattering mouth works ruin.
Proverbs 25:18 ESV
18 A man who bears false witness against his neighbor is like a war club, or a sword, or a sharp arrow.
Proverbs 26:18–19 ESV
18 Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death 19 is the man who deceives his neighbor and says, “I am only joking!”
As wise believers we must be diligent with truth. We must relentlessly believe in the value of telling the truth to others. It’s easy to believe in this when we are faced with big choices and big lies. But it is such a slippery slope to excuse a little lie or a lie that no one will ever notice.

-Gossip/Slander

Why is gossip so fun to do?
Proverbs 18:8 ESV
8 The words of a whisperer are like delicious morsels; they go down into the inner parts of the body.
Easy to spread stories about other people because it makes you feel better about yourself. And it makes you feel like you have power to share. Something special.
Proverbs 11:13 ESV
13 Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing covered.
But the reality is if we can be trustworthy with what other people share with us we can encourage others. If we spread slander we can destroy friendships
Proverbs 16:28 ESV
28 A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.
The reality is that gossiping is worse than the coronavirus. It's a contagious disease that can be very quickly spread. It's our responsibility as believers as wise men and women to stop the spread of toxic gossip. Which is all slander. We need to be known as men and women who are always careful in what we say about others.

-Angry words

What about anger?
Ecclesiastes 7:9 ESV
9 Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the heart of fools.
Anger can be useful to drive us to seek justice for someone else. But more often speaking in acting out of anger will hurt us.
Proverbs 25:28 ESV
28 A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.
Proverbs 14:17 ESV
17 A man of quick temper acts foolishly, and a man of evil devices is hated.
Proverbs 29:22 ESV
22 A man of wrath stirs up strife, and one given to anger causes much transgression.
Proverbs 22:24 ESV
24 Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man,
Anger is obviously very destructive. We must invest in guarding ourselves against speaking and acting out of anger. Obviously for different believers, for different men and women we have different thresholds of anger. Different levels and things that makers angry. But however God has made us we must be careful and remember that anger this far more often destructive then it is put to good use.

-Argumentative words

A close cousin too anger is this idea of quarrelsome words. Or argumentative words.
Proverbs 18:6 ESV
6 A fool’s lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating.
Proverbs 17:19 ESV
19 Whoever loves transgression loves strife; he who makes his door high seeks destruction.
Proverbs 26:21 ESV
21 As charcoal to hot embers and wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome man for kindling strife.
This one is especially relevant for Thanksgiving this week.
Proverbs 17:1 ESV
1 Better is a dry morsel with quiet than a house full of feasting with strife.
Proverbs does not tell us to be doormats and let other people walk all over us. But proverbs warns us that if you are someone quick to a fight if you actually find yourselves getting into fights often then you need to check your heart. Because only a fool pursues arguments all the time.
A wise person once told me that if a family problem wasn't important enough to deal with before a holiday it certainly isn't important enough to deal with on the holiday.
When and if you spend more time with family this week and you find yourself moving to a sensitive topic, guard your words, use your language wisely and carefully. And beware in arguments and anger great destruction is possible.

-Perverse Words

Proverbs 17:20 ESV
20 A man of crooked heart does not discover good, and one with a dishonest tongue falls into calamity.

-Arrogant words

Proverbs 27:1–2 ESV
1 Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring. 2 Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips.

-Too Many words

This is something we especially need to be careful of in this day and age. It is so easy to type and comment and text so much.
Proverbs 13:3 ESV
3 Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.
Proverbs 10:19 ESV
19 When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.
Proverbs 17:28 ESV
28 Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.
Proverbs 29:20 ESV
20 Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him.
Perhaps one of the greatest ways we can learn more wisdom in our words is by speaking and typing less of them.

God’s judgement

because our language is so powerful God is concerned and he will judge people who speak with foolishness.
Proverbs 22:12 ESV
12 The eyes of the Lord keep watch over knowledge, but he overthrows the words of the traitor.
Proverbs 10:10 ESV
10 Whoever winks the eye causes trouble, and a babbling fool will come to ruin.
Proverbs 18:7 ESV
7 A fool’s mouth is his ruin, and his lips are a snare to his soul.
Matthew 12:36–37 ESV
36 I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, 37 for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

How to learn to speak wise words.

Practice self-control

As with every skill wise language takes practice. Fools simply blurt out whatever their thinking. Wise men and women guard their language
Proverbs 21:23 ESV
23 Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.
Listen
Proverbs 18:2 ESV
2 A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.
Proverbs 10:19 ESV
19 When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.
Trust God
Proverbs 20:22 ESV
22 Do not say, “I will repay evil”; wait for the Lord, and he will deliver you.
Forgive
Ephesians 4:32 ESV
32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Treasure integrity in your speech

Proverbs 12:19 ESV
19 Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment.
Proverbs 14:25 ESV
25 A truthful witness saves lives, but one who breathes out lies is deceitful.

Use words to build others

Ephesians 4:29 ESV
29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.
Proverbs 27:9 ESV
9 Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.
Proverbs 12:25 ESV
25 Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.
Proverbs 27:5 ESV
5 Better is open rebuke than hidden love.

Learn Excellence in your words.

Proverbs 15:1 ESV
1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 25:11 ESV
11 A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.
I’ve learned this with Ashley
Proverbs 27:14 ESV
14 Whoever blesses his neighbor with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, will be counted as cursing.
Proverbs 25:15 ESV
15 With patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone.

God’s blessing on wise words.

Speak with wisdom, spread wisdom, experience God’s blessing.
Proverbs 18:20 ESV
20 From the fruit of a man’s mouth his stomach is satisfied; he is satisfied by the yield of his lips.

Conclusion

The heart of our words

Out of the overflow of our hearts our mouth speaks. Unless you allow God to do a transformation on your heart through the work of what Jesus did on the cross you will fight endlessly to change your speech. Wise speech comes out of a transformed heart.
Proverbs 4:23 ESV
23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.
Matthew 12:34–35 ESV
34 You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. 35 The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil.

How Jesus Speaks to each of us.

Jesus is called the word of God
John 1:1 ESV
1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
Jesus trusted Himself and His words to God.
1 Peter 2:23 ESV
23 When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly.
Jesus gave us wise words that fill the New Testament
John 6:63 ESV
63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life.
If you want wisdom your words spend time meditating on and practicing some of the proverbs we’ve mentioned here today and remember God loves to answer the prayers of His Children.
James 1:5 ESV
5 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.
[1] Jim Newheiser, Opening up Proverbs, Opening Up Commentary (Leominster: Day One Publications, 2008), 136.
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