Building Up In Love

Everywhere the Bible is talking about the importance of love in our daily lives. One area that love is of premier importance is in the act of “building others up.” The reality is that each of us is growing toward something. We are not who we once where but the events, relationships, and loves make up who we currently are. Good or bad we are becoming what course we have set for our lives. God has determined for us that relationships are one of the main ways that we are changed and transformed. It is the nature of those relationships that determines what sort of person that we are and are becoming.

Building others up is an act of someone who is seeking out the maturity and well being of another. It is like an incomplete project that someone comes along and helps to finish. Let’s face it when it comes to emotional and spiritual maturity we all are incomplete projects. We regularly come up short in these areas in our day to day life.

God has determined that your sanctification is in community with other believers. It is in this context that we can really grow if we approach these relationships in love. Love is the key!

Ephesians 4:1–3 CSB

Therefore I, the prisoner in the Lord, urge you to walk worthy of the calling you have received, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.

Notice some key elements in this passage. Paul is urging use to “walk worthy of the calling you (we) have received.” To accomplish this he focuses on three personal attributes and two active attributes. The three personal attributes are humility, gentleness, and patience. I believe these three personal attributes are what makes you and others attractive in relational sense. It is with this personal disposition that we then do the action of our calling.

The first action is to bear one another in love. One thing that can be said of relationships is there are moments of unpleasantness. Even the best of friends and lovers will reach a point in their relationship where something unpleasant will afflict them. It could be something the other has said or done. Or it could be some difficult or tragic event in their lives. The key to get through those moments is to bear one another in love!. This is a real test of love. If the relationship dissolves in moments of unpleasantness then what you called love was more likely affection. You see love bears all things (1 Corinthians 13:7). To be sure love celebrates the warm affection and gratitude of a good friend! However, love also perseveres when the warmth and affection have subsided.

The second action is to make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. In this way we are eager to keep unity. How different this is from our modern culture. Most are eager to create disunity. As believers though Paul is telling us that we must make every effort to keep unity. There is a key qualifier here though “of the Spirit.” This points to the reality that Christians are united by the Holy Spirit of God. It is not a spirit of unity that we are longing for. Even the world longs for this at times. It is unity under the provission and authority of God.

If you are looking for what unity of the Spirit looks like consider the fruit of the Spirit: love,joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Notice that these traits of the Spirit are central to the verses we are looking at. Notably love, peace, patience, and gentleness. When we live these out in community then God’s sanctifying work is accomplished in our lives.

Ephesians 4:14–16 CSB

Then we will no longer be little children, tossed by the waves and blown around by every wind of teaching, by human cunning with cleverness in the techniques of deceit. But speaking the truth in love, let us grow in every way into him who is the head—Christ. From him the whole body, fitted and knit together by every supporting ligament, promotes the growth of the body for building itself up in love by the proper working of each individual part.

The body of Christ, that is the Church, is to function to build up one another into maturity (Ephesians 4:11-13). This is accomplished through spiritual gifts given by Christ (Ephesians 4:7). Notice in verse 14 that we are not immature, tossed about by every trend in teaching, susceptible to clever argumentation, cunning, or deceit. BUT, “Speak the truth in love” and Grow into Christ. It is by Christ that we are put together as a body of believers. Further it is this body then that “builds itself up in love.” This building up in love is to ensure the “proper working of each person.”

Love is the contrast to immaturity and instability. When we fail to love we lack the staying power of mature love. Young love is passionate, but shallow. Mature love is secure and deep. What is more speaking truth in love creates stability of teaching and learning. When speaking the truth in love is absent it is the cleverness, craftiness, and deception that are the foundation of this unrighteous teaching.

I have a strong reaction to people that try to persuade others using deception. I have this reaction even when I agree with their underlying point. We have reached a point in our public life that many believe (or act as if they believe) cleverness, craftiness, or deception are acceptable as long as they support or promote our beliefs and desired outcomes. This is the way of the world.

As believers we cannot fall into the ways of the world no matter what. Speak TRUTH in LOVE. Is a simple yet profound reality of Christian teaching and faith. This is the standard by which we must walk and live. Our very souls and other’s souls depend on it!