Don't Breakdown

2 Samuel 19:7a - Now therefore arise

Intro 1

last week, “Let God have his job back”

It is not God’s job to give you what you want

There is that scripture ”delight yourself in the Lord . . . . “ but correctly interpreted doesn’t mean that God is a type of Santa Claus

He has said that he would give you what you need

and lo and behold, I’ve learned that God has a different definition of my needs

to make a long story short, the Christian life/Godly life is neither simple nor easy

and we see all of this come to play in the life of David

Intro 2

We have all done things that we regret

people fail, we fail, and we regret

one of the worst feelings is should’ve, could’ve, would do it differently if I could go back

many regrets come because of poor relationship choices, poor money decisions, laziness on our part, a failure to communicate, lack of patience

And David is facing regret in this narrative

he committed adultery, murder, against a friend

and though forgiven, God said there would be consequences

and David is in the middle of facing these consequences

Review

King David’s son Absalom has revolted and now it is time for the armies of both to fight

right before the battle, David instructed his soldiers to not harm his son, Absalom, because he still loves him dearly

the battle starts, and by the power of the lord, David’s forces defeat the greater forces of Absalom

Absalom is found helpless in the forest, swinging by his hair from a tree

Joab, David’s commander and cousin, kills Absalom (2nd cousin) anyway

and David though victorious, goes into mourning over the death of his son

probably felt guilty for not being the best dad

probably felt guilty for his sin contributing to this chain of events

then of course there is just the love from a father to a son

David is full of sorrow and regret

because of what he should have done, could have done, would do differently if he could go back

if only I had been with the army like I should have been, if only I let Bathsheba be when I found out she was married, if only I had admitted my mistake to Uriah! If only I had been a better father

everything would have been different, could have been different

my son, my son, I wish I had died instead of you!

and because of that regret he begins to break down

this old testament hero begins to break down

the slayer of Goliath begins to break down

Jesus is the son of God, but Jesus nickname is the “son of David”, this David

the one who wrote, “The Lord is my shepherd” begins to break down

the one who wrote,” I will bless the Lord at all times”

and I am not looking at him in judgment, up till then David has been so strong

he showed wisdom and leadership in escaping quickly when he heard about the rebellion

he was kingly in deciding to sparing Jerusalem from being sieged

he was generous in telling Ittai and his men, “you all don’t have to be fugitives with me”

he was spiritual in leaving the ark behind,

he was prayerful that the advice of his enemies be defeated

he was all business in rewarding Ziba some land for helping him escape

he showed intelligence in setting up a spy system before he left

he demonstrated mercy while bearing the insults of Shimei as he left

he was showed perseverance in surviving in the wilderness

he demonstrated his capacity to strategize when preparing the army for battle

he was practical in listening to his men to stay out of the battle unless absolutely necessary

he showed patience is waiting for the results

he so strong, so noble, so godly, a true hero, a Bible hero

but when he hears news of his son’s death . . . he begins to break down

he held is all together so long, but things have taken their toll, so much turmoil, suffering, and the final blow of his son’s death seems to be too much

turns out that David is a normal man, and this normal man begins to break down

let me define break down

Feel like life isn’t worth living, He started to say that he wished he would have died

continue to heap Blame on yourself for the loss or for failing to prevent it

Feel numb and disconnected from others for more than a few weeks

Are unable to perform your normal daily activities

some of you are on the verge of a break of a break down

you’ve handled this and that

you’ve been noble, godly, patient, spiritual . . . but you are a normal person like David

and it seems if one more thing goes wrong . . . . you feel that you don’t know if I can handle it!

and God has sent a word today!

2 Samuel 19:1–4 NASB95

1 Then it was told Joab, “Behold, the king is weeping and mourns for Absalom.” 2 The victory that day was turned to mourning for all the people, for the people heard it said that day, “The king is grieved for his son.” 3 So the people went by stealth into the city that day, as people who are humiliated steal away when they flee in battle. 4 The king covered his face and cried out with a loud voice, “O my son Absalom, O Absalom, my son, my son!”

Life is so tough that you can win and lose at the same time

in this passage, David’s army has won the battle, but he has lost a son

David had hoped that his army would win and Absalom would have been captured or escaped

but all hoped for did not come to pass

remember I said it is not God’s job to give you everything you want

God gave him a miracle in escaping by giving him extra time

God gave him a miracle in letting his smaller army defeat a much larger army

but God did not spare his son

Have you ever won and lost?

you graduated from school but the school loans are staring you in the face

you finally broke away from that destructive relationship but you have lost some of the best years of your life

you achieved /been successful, but some so called friends got jealous

the truth came out and you were exonerated, but the false rumors linger on

you had sickness and you got better, but you did not fully recover

you won . . . but you have lost

And David’s response to winning but yet losing is so weep and mourn

weeping - cry profusely, to be distraught

mourn - official sadness, state of sadness, daily sadness, despairing

he’s on the verge of a complete breakdown, all he can say is, “Oh my son, Absalom, Oh Absalom, my son, my son”

and like I said, God has a word for us if we won but still lost . . . and are weeping and mourning

but it’s not an easy word, this verse says, “They told Joab”

and God is going to speak to us through David’s crazy, gangsta cousin . . . Joab

the thoughts of gangsters are usually wrong, just like any other sinner

but there is a helpful simplicity to the thought process of a gangster

“get or get got” . . by that they men kill or be killed

if one of you “rolled up on me”, I admit that it would take me a few seconds to register and react

Bro. Wallace?, Kiyah?

I would be stunned first and then I might try to talk to them, “Wait . . . . what’s going on?”

not a gangster (reach into my jacket)

get or get got, ask question later homie

that’s why Joab killed Absalom, “if we let you go, everybody will try to rebel”

and he and his men made an example out of him!

when a gangster is right, we can learn from their straight forward thought process

so just note that God is speaking through this gangster, it’s simple, but it is not easy

2 Samuel 19:5 NASB95

5 Then Joab came into the house to the king and said, “Today you have covered with shame the faces of all your servants, who today have saved your life and the lives of your sons and daughters, the lives of your wives, and the lives of your concubines,

Joab enters the house, and just gets straight to the point!

you’ve made us all feel like fools for winning the battle

I know you are hurting for you son

but the obvious problem with weeping and mourning when you have won, is that you are not supposed to weep and mourn when you have won!

you didn’t win like you wanted to win, but you did win

you didn’t win like you hoped to win, but you did win

you didn’t win like you expected to win, but you did win

and winners are thankful

somebody is thinking, “hmph, I can’t think of anything that went right!”

probably what David was thinking

Joab said let me count your blessing for you

it’s simple, but watch what Joab does

Joab doesn’t count what David lost, but what David did not lose

Joab said your life has been saved and the lives of the rest of your family has been saved

Absalom is dead, but you still have other sons that are yet alive

Adonijah, Shephatiah, Ithream, Shimea, Shobab, Nathan, Solomon, Ibhar, Elishama, Eliphelet, Nogah, Nepheg, Japhia, Elishama, Eliada

while you are counting what you lost, while you are counting what you wish you had . . .

Count what you still have.

if you want to avoid a complete breakdown, count what you still have!

be thankful for what you didn’t lose, you could have lost more, things could have been worse, though you are hurting, you still have a reason to rejoice!

some of us are about to breakdown . . .

but we are still eating three meals a day

but you still have clothes on your back

while trying to decide which shoes to wear

about to breakdown in the house that gives you shelter

about to break down in the car that provides transportation

about to break down as you pass the homeless in the streets

somebody lost a job, and is about to break down because they have to live off of their savings

count what you still have . . . somebody ought to say, “It’s rough, but I still have . . . “

I still have life

when you wake up in the morning, you should look around the room and say, “I still have”

I can still hear, I can still see, I can still talk

you ought to tug your clothes and say I still have

there’s a good chance you have a loved one in this room, and you should say, “I still have”

and when you start counting what you still have

paying attention to what you still have

and being thankful for what you still have

you’ll find that you’ll still have joy, still have peace, still have a praise, still have a shout,

i dare you to count what you still have

a gangster would say, “count what you got” . . . then Joab continues, “you have shamed us by . . .”

2 Samuel 19:6 NASB95

6 by loving those who hate you, and by hating those who love you. For you have shown today that princes and servants are nothing to you; for I know this day that if Absalom were alive and all of us were dead today, then you would be pleased.

Joab is saying, I guess you wished everything was reversed?

that we died and Absalom lived?

Understand David, there was no other outcome for a person who commits treason, even your son

Absalom had to die or you and the rest of your family had to die

My king, there was only options A or B, there was no option C”

there was no scenario where you were victorious AND Absalom was allowed to live

i mean God can do anything, there is nothing impossible for him

but doesn’t mean that God does any and everything

in this situation, there were only two options, David . . .

one things that brings us down is when we think we missed out on something

if a billionaire walked in and said, “God told me to give 10 million to everyone in this room”

then those who missed church for legitimate reasons would be mad, sad, depressed

those who could have been here at church would be mad, sad, depressed

now if no one walks in here and we don’t get some amazing financial blessing

then those who missed church for legitimate reasons will feel fine

those who could have been here at church will feel fine

the problem only comes when we believe that we missed out . . .

so now this one is a tough one, but remember I said this Christian/godly life is not easy or simple, Joab is preaching to us and telling us that you must . . .

You got the best of the available options.

Believe that God gave you the best of the available options.

in other words, you did not miss out

often a Christian who is on the verge of a breakdown has misjudged the available options, our expectations were misguided . . . there was only option A or B . . . there was never an option C

maybe you were dating a no good person

option A - God gives you strength to break away and you lose some of the best years of your life

option B - you stay with them and waste all the years of your life

there was never option C - where they change and become the person you always imagined

God could do anything, but because of his wisdom and his plans, that option was not available

it was never available and you are sad because God didn’t allow you to waste your whole life

you were successful in business

option A - you can be successful with jealous ex friends or

option B - remain unsuccessful and keep your fake friends

there was never an option C - successful and fake friends turn out to be real

and you are sad because God said I want you to be successful and know who your real friends are

a lie is told on you

option A - you can be exonerated but some false rumors persist anyway

option B - you pay the price for something you didn’t do

there was never an option C where you were cleared AND everyone thinks highly of you

and you are grieving and mourning because God chose to exonerate you

a lot of us are face with health challenges (father, undergoing tests, dealing with ailments) . . so listen carefully

option A - you can recover partially from the sickness

option B - no improvement whatsoever. . . and maybe there was an option C

option C - get worse

God can do anything and maybe there is an option D on the table in the future, where you are completely healed

but right now you only have been presented with: improvement, stay sick, or get worse

and you are complaining because God chose improvement

i told you that it is not God’s job to give you what you want, sometimes God gives you exactly what you desire and sometimes he does not

sometimes the only options are better or worse, and “everything turns out perfect” is not on the table/not available

and you have to trust that of the options that were available, truly available

that God gave you the best one!

God is not Santa Claus, just get whatever you want .

and Joab is saying, “What’s wrong with you?!!!

Thank God for better

be thankful for improvement

you may not be where you want to be but you’ve made progress

you may not have the best, but you did get an up grade

you did not reach what you aspired to, but he did take you to a higher level

thank God that even though it wasn’t an open door, there was still an open window

thank God that even though everything was not green pastures and still waters, that he is still walking with you through the valley

Thank God for givind you the better option

some of us are pining/crying/whining for an option that was never there

and it’s funny how when we are in the middle of difficulty, we will take almost any option

Now I’m like, “man wasted 3 to 4 years of my life goofing in colllege” all the money I could have made, the time I could have used to be more productive, the experience I could have gained . . . . whining

but back then, I was like, Lord just help me graduate, I don’t care w hen, I don’t care in what, I’ll praise your name

some of you were like, Lord just get me out of this relationship, they can have it all, I just want out

Lord, just get me out of this legal problem, others can think what they want, just let the judge rule in my favor

gout - if you just reduce the pain, so that I can lay in the bed with pain, i’ll limp, i just need some relief!

If I gave one of my sons a 2013 Toyota Camry, don’t you know that they would likely hug my neck and cry?

because they know the options are limited based on my financial status

it’s all about what was really available

cause when you know the true options, and you know how bad it could have been

you remember to be thankful and say, “If it had not been for the Lord on my side, where would I be”

let me show you some real life options in the life of some believers . . . in this next Scripture, David and the people of Israel had sinned, and God gave them some options

2 Samuel 24:12–13 NASB95

12 “Go and speak to David, ‘Thus the Lord says, “I am offering you three things; choose for yourself one of them, which I will do to you.” ’ ” 13 So Gad came to David and told him, and said to him, “Shall seven years of famine come to you in your land? Or will you flee three months before your foes while they pursue you? Or shall there be three days’ pestilence in your land? Now consider and see what answer I shall return to Him who sent me.”

do any of these options look good?

is there a let’s just forget about the sin, it’s all good option

look at Peter’s options in the New Testament

John 21:18–19 NASB95

18 “Truly, truly, I say to you, when you were younger, you used to gird yourself and walk wherever you wished; but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands and someone else will gird you, and bring you where you do not wish to go.” 19 Now this He said, signifying by what kind of death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me!”

Peter, you will suffer and die for my sake . . . follow me . . . Jesus did say, “when you grow old”, so I guess the options were

live a short life and suffer and die for my sake

live a long life and suffer and die for my sake

and God gave him the better option, long life and suffer and die

nothing like a dose of reality

So David since you have . . . .

counted what you still have

been reminded that God gave you the best of available options . . .

2 Samuel 19:7 NASB95

7 “Now therefore arise, go out and speak kindly to your servants, for I swear by the Lord, if you do not go out, surely not a man will pass the night with you, and this will be worse for you than all the evil that has come upon you from your youth until now.”

arise . . .get up .

David, you get up and tell the ones who helped you, thank you!

Christian, I know you didn’t get everything you wanted, but you need to arise and tell the one who helped you, thank you!

I know you are hurting, I know you are in pain

but still, you need to arise and tell the one who kept you, thank you!

tell the one who stuck with you, through all of this, tell him thank you!

I’ve learned that you can be hurt and yet be grateful

I see my brother in law dealing with the loss in his life, but I also see him being grateful

I see my father dealing with sickness, but still at church every Sunday, telling God thanks

a gangster would say “if you didn’t get got, you ought to be thankful”

i might be injured, but I didn’t get got . . . so I say thank you

hurt, but I didn’t get got . . . so I bless his holy name

i might be weary, but I didn’t get got . . .. so i still have a praise

Lastly, Joab gives a final reason

Arise because troubles are not over and things could still get worse

stuff you need to do

don’t lose tomorrow because you are breaking down today

you still have a kingdom to conquer, temple to prepare for, a legacy to establish

Don’t breakdown because God is not through with you yet

invitation

two options on the table