Follow Good Examples

3 John 9-15

What IF?

Have you ever played the “What if?” game? It used to be a fairly standard game for youth groups back when I was a youth minister. You’d hand out everyone a card, and they would write a “What if?” question on it. They might write something like: “What if we had platypus for pets instead of dogs?” or “What if the sky was green instead of blue?” or “What if French fries had never been invented?”

Then those cards would be collected, shuffled, and handed back out making sure that no one got their own question. Then they would have to write an answer to the question that they received on the back of the card.

We’d usually be sitting in a circle, and a person would be selected to read their question, but instead of reading their answer to it, the person to the right of them would read their answer as the answer for that question. They didn’t always line up, but they were usually pretty funny, and occasionally they were surprisingly good answers. It provided a lot a fun, and the youth would keep playing it, if you let them. If you’ve never played that game, you should try it sometime when you have friends over.

In preparation of when get to play this game, I want to give you a little practice. I have a ‘what if’ question for you, and I want you to think of an answer to it. You don’t have to write it down. Are you ready for the question? “What if an apostle sent a letter to be read in our church and it was delivered to you?” I’ll give you a moment, do have an answer? My answer is, “You’d be very, very old.” Because the apostles lived a long time ago.

If you lived back in those ancient days, and a letter from an apostle was delivered to you; that would mean that were a leader in the church to whom that letter was written. If you look at most of the letters that make up the New Testament, you’ll discover that they were sent to churches, not individuals, but they were delivered to individuals who would read them to the church. But when an apostle sent a letter to an individual, instead of a church, like the one we are studying today, that’s when the gospel gets personal.

A letter intended for a church would have arrived by currier, hand delivered, and the currier would have been a representative of the apostle who sent it, and that currier would have been prepared to explain anything in the letter to the church it was being delivered to. And, if there was something the apostle wanted done by the church, like when Paul asked the believers in Corinth to take up a collection for the believers in Judea, the currier would also have been prepared to start implementing that request.

If you were the individual who received a letter from an apostle for the church, you would certainly read it in advance of sharing it with the church. But what would you do if you didn’t agree with what the apostle said in that letter? Would you still do as instructed, and read it to the church? And what would you do with those who delivered the letter? What would you say to them?

God’s word, found in the pages of the New Testament, is just as much a letter “to us” today, as it was to those who first received the letters that form it. And like some of those who first received them, we may not always like what God has to say to us in them. And, like those ancient believers, we have to decide what we will do with it. Will we trust and obey, or will we throw it away?

Diotrephes – A Bad Example

The Elder who wrote this letter, John, had previously sent a letter to the church in Derbe, but it was not delivered to Gaius, it was delivered to a man named Diotrephes. He was another leader in the church, but he was not like Gaius at all, to whom this personal letter that we are studying was sent. Diotrephes, as John pointed out in this letter, liked to be “first among them.” He not only liked to be in charge; but he was, evidently, a “my way or the highway” sort of guy. And he didn’t like what John had to say in the letter for the church that had been delivered to him, so, it was not read to the church. An ambitious spirit will breed malice against those who oppose it, or even try to correct it. Malice in the heart of a prideful man will rise to his lips. As Jesus once said, “Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45)

We don’t know what Diotrephes did with that letter, but it wasn’t preserved, so it is not a part of the New Testament. That doesn’t mean that the New Testament is missing something today. I believe that God has communicated His will to us clearly and fully. If He wanted to add something to what He sent to us through the apostles, He would have done so.

The Apostles’ Teaching

Instead of reading the letter he received, Diotrephes gathered the church together and slandered John, who must have been the one who sent it. John told Gaius that Diotrephes said things to the church about “us” that were not true. I want you to notice that John did not say “me,” but “us,” in verse 10. There is some debate about who was supposed to be included in this “us,” but a minimum would be the church and its leaders where John was at when he wrote this letter, and some think that John may have been including even more in this “us.” He may have been referring to all the apostles and to everyone who held to their teachings. So he may have been including you.

When the church was first established on the day of Pentecost when Peter first preached under the influence of the Holy Spirit; three thousand people responded. They had asked, “What can we do?” And he told them, “repent and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of their sins,” and assured them that they “would receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.” (Acts 2:38) And that is what happened.

This “first church” continually “devoted themselves to the apostle’s teaching, to fellowship, to the breaking of bread, and to prayer.” (Acts 2:42) And these should be the priority of any church. Our devotion to the apostles’ teachings mean that we study and adhere to God’s word as our final rule for faith and practice.

But Diotrephes didn’t want to follow the apostle’s teachings. And that’s why he also refused to welcome the brethren who had been sent out by John when they arrived. He didn’t want anyone hearing what John had to say. Diotrephes even threw people out of the church who had welcomed the brethren.

I am pretty sure that Gaius was thrilled to hear that John, when he came, would deal with Diotrephes. Someone needed to deal with him before he ran everyone who wanted to follow the apostles’ teachings out of the church. And before he convinced more people to ignore what the apostles had to say about being the church.

Gaius is Tempted

Since Gaius had welcomed the brethren, he might be one of those people in the church that Diotrephes was trying to run off. But, evidently, Gaius wasn’t running. It would have been tempting for Gaius to “fight fire with fire,” but John encouraged him “not to imitate what is evil, but what is good.”

In other words, John did not want Gaius acting like Diotrephes in any form or fashion. To emphasize this request, John reminded Gaius that “the one who does good is of God; and the one who does evil has not seen God.” Those are pretty strong words, implying that Diotrephes, even though he was a leader in the church, didn’t have a right relationship with God. Which means that he would never be able to lead anyone to God, until his own relationship with God was restored.

I’d like to say that this was the only time when this sort of person wiggled their way into the leadership of a church, but it has happened in every age, and is still happening today. Which is why we have to be careful about following a church leader, simply because they are in a leadership position. Those that we choose to follow should display the fruit of the Spirit, the character of Christ. It should be obvious to anyone looking at them, that they are following Jesus. And, just as a reminder, Jesus said that those who follow Him would be known by their love.

Fortunately, bad leaders are not the norm. It is much more normal for good leaders to rise up.

Demetrius - A Good Example

John felt that it was not only vital that Gaius did what was good himself, but that he follow the example a leader in the church who was known for doing what was good. That’s why John directed Gaius’ attention to Demetrius. Not the silversmith in Ephesus that we talked about last week, but Demetrius who was another church leader in Derbe.

Demetrius set a good example, because he was good guy. Everyone said so, and the truth, John said, backed it up. He had a good reputation, even with those who were at the church where John was at felt this way; which means that people were talking about the good things that Demetruis had been doing, and that news was spreading.

John wanted Gaius to know that he really could trust Demetruis. This was a very important recommendation because Gaius was probably wondering who he could trust. And John was letting him know that he was not alone in standing up for what was true. Gaius could partner with and draw strength from Demetrius as they stood for the truth together. He was the sort of man whose example Gaius could follow.

Who are You Imitating?

I’ll be perfectly honest. I am very glad that we are not in the same sort of situation as was this ancient church; but, what John wrote to Gaius is still good advice for us to follow. We need good examples to follow. And fortunately, we have quite a few of those in our church. If you aren’t able to spot one on your own, give me a call, I’d be glad to point one out for you. If you want to find one on your own, you can start by looking at our Elders, but we also have some other great examples you could follow, who have never been set apart to serve that way.

When you are looking for an example to follow, you want to know, “How do they treat their family? How do they handle bad news? How they treat their friends? How do they behave when they are not at church? How do they treat their enemies? What sort of reputation do they have around town? What about at work? When they are on vacation?”

It really is true that actions speak louder than words, especially when we are looking for someone to follow. We want to follow someone who is really following Jesus, 24/7.

Better Together

John concluded his letter to Gaius by telling him that he had a lot more things that he wanted to talk to Gaius about, but he didn’t want to do it with pen and ink. As we noted in last week’s study, there is something good about meeting face to face that can’t be replaced by other forms of communication. Texts, emails, phone calls, video chats all have their place, and we are better off with them than without them, but we also need face to face time.

John wanted Gaius to know that they were going to enjoy some when he arrived. To be honest, we don’t know whether John ever made that trip, but I like to think that he was able to go, and that he took Gaius spent some time together. I like to believe that he was able to settle things down in this ancient church. It would have taken a lot of changes to get them back on track; but, if God can save a prodigal son, I am certain that He can also save a prodigal church as well.

A Prayer for Peace

Given the tension and division that existed in this ancient church, I thought that it was wise of John to offer Gauis a blessing of peace. If there was anything that he needed under the stresses he faced, it was the kind of peace that passes understanding – God’s kind of peace.

You Are Not Alone – You have Friends

In his final words, John told Gaius that “the friends” sent their greetings. This would have reminded Gaius that he was not alone. We don’t know the identity of these “friends,” some may have been people who had once been a part of the church in Derbe and were now at the church where John was at. It could have been a reference to some of the brethren who had returned from Derbe with the news about how they had been treated by Gaius while there. Or it could have been someone who Gaius had met when he had travelled with Paul. Whoever these “friends” were, they were on his side; and some of those in this circle of “friends” were still in Derbe; and by asking Gaius to greet them for him, by name. John was reminding him, in yet another way, that Gaius was not alone.

I want to close with another “What IF” question. “What would have to change at our church, in our families, in our lives; IF we fully devoted ourselves, not to some ideology, but to the apostle’s teachings?”

Pray: Lord Jesus, help us follow good examples rather than evil ones. And may we be blessed with many friends. Amen.