Gentle and Lowly: The Heart of Our Savior

Intro:

Good Morning, I hope you guys had a great night.

Like I mentioned yesterday my wife and I adopted our daughter Suzy in July but we have been taking care of her for almost two years now. So at this point I pretty much know everything there is about being a parent.

No. It took me about 3 minutes of being a parent before I realized I have absolutely no idea what in the world is going on. Which on that note can I just encourage you to be gracious with your parents. Being a parent is hard.

That being said because Abby and I adopted Suzy out of Foster care so we had to go through 10 weeks of classes to teach us how to take care of children who have gone through trauma. I think one of the most important things we have learned in that class and in the last couple years of parenting is this.

We were taught when you parent a foster child you need to spend less time disciplining wrong behavior and you need to spend more time meeting needs.

Now that sounds very new age. Very postmodern. But it really isn’t. In fact many of you would maybe like it if your parents just stopped disciplining you and let you do whatever you wanted. That wouldn’t be a good idea. Because discipline is very very important. To not discipline a child is not love a child.

And If you come to our house sometime you will see us disciplining our child because we love her. But we’ve had to learn in this experience that it is actually more important to meet needs than it is to discipline.

Let me try to explain.

You see every child (and teen) has a need for safety or security and love. They need to know that they are both safe and secured as well as loved. But as you can imagine when a child enters the foster care system both of those needs go out the window. In a moment they are ripped from their home and their family.

Where even though they may not have been safe there they felt safe and secure because that’s what they knew. But in a moment they are taken from everything they knew and placed in a new and to them a scary environment where they don’t recognized their surroundings the smells are different, the people are different, the animals are new, everything is very different and that is an unsettling experience to put it mildly.

It’s scary to be somewhere new on your own with people you don’t know. They don’t feel safe regardless of how much safer they probably are.

Not only do they not feel safe they also don’t feel loved. Their parents although they may have loved them imperfectly they do normally love them very much and in an instant they are ripped from any connection to their loved ones and they feel alone, unsafe, and unloved.

As you can imagine when a child experiences something like this they typically act up in a variety of ways. They may scream at you, call you names, lie to you, hit and punch you, run and hide from you, break your things, kick your dog or just outright rebel and disobey you, or some mixture of all of those things.

And it is hard to parent a child like that. Because every fiber in your body wants to discipline them for those behaviors and there is “some” room for that. But the child is merely acting out in those ways because they don’t know how to constructively express their feelings so they act up.

But what we’ve found is that a much more effective way to deal with their behavior is not any kind of discipline, or rebuke, or punishment. But rather meeting them in their needs. Showing them that they are safe and they are loved. That they are secure and that they are cared for. And when a child feels safe and loved it is amazing the difference in their behaviors.

And that’s a process not a one time event. We have to show them day after day, moment after moment that they are safe and that they are loved. And once they begin to trust. Once they begin to feel both safe and loved it is amazing the difference in their behaviors.

Why do I bring this up this morning?

I have now been working with teens for several years and I have seen all kinds of bad behaviors. I’ve seen the classic one’s like drinking, doing drugs, and having sex. I’ve dealt with teens who sell drugs, who are addicted to pornography. Who outright rebel against their parents. Teens who have physically attacked people. I haven’t seen it all by any stretch of the imagination but I’ve seen a lot.

I’ve also seen some of the quieter bad behaviors. Some of you are living in rebellion against God but you are doing it much more behind the scenes much more on the down low. People think you’re a good kid but in reality, it’s all a lie.

I’ve also seen the kids you are desperately trying to please God yet they can’t seem to kick that sin. That sin that has haunted them for years won’t leave and they can’t seem to find victory. They have this behavior they want to stop but they don’t know how and they feel discouraged.

What’s worse I’ve seen the way people deal with teens like this. They scream and yell at them for disobeying. They punish them in ways that are inappropriate. They try to motivate them to do what is right by making them feel guilty for all that they’ve done.

But I believe very strongly there is something else going on behind the scenes here. Something else that is causing this behavior and therefore something else needs to be done.

I see teens all the time who do not feel safe. They may not fear for their physical safety. Although that’s true for some. But they live in constant anxiety of what people think about them and what people will say and do behind there back. They worry what might happen to them if they are not accepted or rejected. They live in constant fear of what someone may post and how that will affect their social standing.

Teens who live in anxiety about what they are going to do someday. Where they are going to go to college what major they are going to choose what job they are going to get.

Whatever it is I know that many, if not most of you here today live with that pit in your stomach. You know what I’m talking about. For some of you that feeling is always there you live with this low grade sense of anxiety or fear. For others that pit in your stomach comes and goes depending on where you are or what you are doing or who you are with.

You live in fear.

Other here this morning can’t shake the feeling that you’re not loved. Or you live worrying that the person that does love you will leave. Maybe you have been left before and you can’t help but think the person that loves you now is going to leave you too.

Or maybe you just flat out don’t feel loved.

Well here’s the thing. Children, teens, and adults are all pretty much the same. We all have a need to feel safe, secured, and loved and when we don’t feel safe or loved we act out in all kinds of different ways.

You do drugs to try to escape that feeling anxiety. You cut your wrists because in that moment we can control the pain. You go from boyfriend to boyfriend hoping that this new guy will fill that need to be loved. You give up your body hoping to feel loved. Or maybe you are addicted to pornography and in the moment you feel a sense of love or satisfaction by staring at a screen but then all you feel is guilt and shame.

You are not different than a foster child or a “well adjusted” adult. You have a need to feel loved and to feel safe.

So how do we change? Should I just yell at you and try to motivate you to do what is right? Should I try to make you feel guilty for all the wrong that you have done? Should I heap even more shame on you than you already feel? Or maybe should I try to build up your self-esteem and tell you how amazing you are even though deep down you know you’re a failure?

I don’t think so.

I am convinced that the more we look at Christ the more our fears melt away. The more time we spend looking at Christ the less we fear for our social standing. The more we look at Christ the less we fear what man can do to us. The more we look at the one who holds our future in his hands the less we fear that future.

The more we look at Christ the less we feel unlovable and the more we feel loved.

Here’s what I think this morning. I think for the most part we are far more exhausted than we realize. Far more discouraged than we want to admit. Far more depressed than we let on. Far more afraid than we show.

But as we look at Christ and our fears melt away then and only then can we find rest. It is impossible to truly rest when you live in fear and I don’t think we understand how truly tired we all are. We are exhausted. And this morning I invite you to look at the God of the Bible and find rest in him.

Let’s pray before we open up God’s word.

Matthew 11:28–30 (ESV)

28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

From these verses I want us to look at who Christ is and what we are supposed to do.

Let’s first take a moment and see who Christ is.

The test says, for I am gentle and lowly in heart

In all four gospel, Matthew Mark, Luke, and John 89 chapters of Biblical text this is the only time that Jesus tells us about his own heart.

We learn much about Jesus in all of the gospels We learn the story of his birth, we learn about his childhood, his earthly ministry, the men he choose to be his disciples. We learn about the miracles he performed, the people he healed and feed. We learn about messages that he preached, stories that he told, lessons that he taught and yet this is the only time that Jesus tells us about his own heart

He says, I am gentle and lowly in heart.

Think about that for a moment. He could have described himself in so many different ways. He could have said I am joyful and generous, I am holy and perfect, exalted and dignified and all of those things would have been true and in fact through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit those things have been said about Jesus. And yet Jesus himself in the flesh describes himself in this way. He says I am gentle and lowly in heart.

Now what does the word heart mean in the Bible? It is not typically what we think of when we say heart today. In our time and culture, the heart is the place where are emotions are.

Although that is true to an extent in scripture it’s also much more than that. The heart, as one author, put is the central animating center of all we do. The heart, in biblical terms, is not part of who we are but the center of who we are. Our heart is what defines and directs us. That is why Solomon tells us to “keep [the] heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life”

The heart is what we care about. It’s what gets us out of bed in the morning. It’s who we are. And Jesus says I am gentle and lowly in heart.

The word for gentle in these verses only occurs three different times in the Bible. It’s found in the first beatitude. The “meek” will inherit the earth. It’s found in Matthew 21 when Jesus says the king is coming to you “humble” and mounted on a donkey.

And in 1 Peter 3:4 When Peter is encouraging wives, Peter writes, “but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.

The word, therefore, can mean meek, humble, and gentle. Jesus is telling us that his heart, his central animating center is not trigger happy, not-harsh, reactionary, or easily frustrated.

One author writes, “The posture most natural to him is not a pointed finger but open arms.”

Jesus is gentle in heart. But He is also lowly.

The world lowly is very similar to the world gentle. It means humble. However, typically when the word humble is used or lowly is used. It refers to humility not as a virtue but humility in the sense of hardship or impoverishment. To be lowly is to be pushed downward by life’s circumstances.

Listen to the words of Mary’s song from Luke chapter 1. She sings

Luke 1:52 (ESV)

52 he has brought down the mighty from their thrones and exalted those of humble estate;

Humble estate is in contrast to those on their thrones. To have a humble estate is to be low in society.

The point that Jesus is making by calling himself lowly. Is that he is accessible. Yes, Jesus is perfect, he is holy, completely set apart, without blemish, and completely pre-eminent or superior. However, for all his glory, and supremacy no one has ever been more accessible than Jesus.

Think of Esther and the dread she went through before entering the king’s throne room. Or the difficulty you and I would have in garnering a meeting with the President. Because in this world when someone is in power they are insulated from us average folks. They have layers and layers of protection for the exact purpose of making them inaccessible.

Or think of the last time you had a problem. The last time you had a real struggle in your life. Who are you more likely to open up to? Your friend who has it all together and looks down on those around him who are not as good as he? OR the friend who is also a mess. The friend who has shared with you their struggles?

It is natural to be held at a distance from those in power or to shy away from those who look perfect and yet Jesus who is perfect, who is all powerful says he is lowly in heart. He is accessible. Like a caring adult gets on their knee they lower themselves to look a child in the eyes. Jesus has lowered himself from the heavens and taken the form of a servant and come in the likeness of man. So that he could be accessible to us.

One author wrote, This, according to his own testimony, is Christ’s very heart. This is who he is. Tender. Open. Welcoming. Accommodating. Understanding. Willing. If we are asked to say only one thing about who Jesus is, we would be honoring Jesus’s own teaching if our answer is, gentle and lowly.

There are no hoops to jump through, no tasks to complete, you don’t have to know someone, or be known by someone, you don’t have to have privilege, money, or respect to have access to Jesus. Because our Savior is gentle and lowly in heart.

The minimum standard to meet, the minimum requirement, in order to have access to Jesus is simply to come.

This is not who he is to everyone however, look at the preceding paragraph. Jesus says this In Matthew as well

Woe to you, Chorazin! Woe to you, Bethsaida! For if the mighty works done in you had been done in Tyre and Sidon, they would have repented long ago in sackcloth and ashes. 22 But I tell you, it will be more bearable on the day of judgment for Tyre and Sidon than for you. 23 And you, Capernaum, will you be exalted to heaven? You will be brought down to Hades. For if the mighty works done in you had been done in Sodom, it would have remained until this day. 24 But I tell you that it will be more tolerable on the day of judgment for the land of Sodom than for you.”

Jesus is gentle and lowly he is not mushy and frothy. He does not wink at sin. He does not take it lightly. He hates sin and he will punish the sinner. But for those of us who come. For those who would repent of their sins. He is gentle, accessible and kind.

The question then we must ask is then, What does Jesus mean when he says, “Come to me.”

To come to Jesus means to put your faith in him. To repent of your sins and place all of your trust and hope in him. Jesus is offering us salvation if only we would come and put our trust in him. To come to Jesus means to submit to His Lordship. To take his yoke and follow him.

John 6:35 (ESV)

35 Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.

Come and believe are parallel just as hunger and thirst. To come and believe in Jesus is to be given food and water that does never run out and to be filled forever.

There is not creed you need to memorize, no task you need to accomplish, no prayer you have to say. Jesus is simply asking to come, submit, and rest in him.

Who does Jesus call to come? Is there a specific person who he will accept?

The verse says all who labor and are heavy laden

That word labor can also mean weary and the idea is those who are weary from laboring. It carries the idea of working to the point of exhaustion.

Jesus is talking to people who are weary to the point of exhaustion from trying to earn the favor of God. Jesus is inviting people to come who are exhausted from trying to please God through their own strength and recourses.

The word heavy-laden speaks of external pressure that has been dumped on them in the past that they are now having to carry. While being weary speaks of the internal weariness of trying to please God heavy laden speaks simply of the difficulty of life.

I think we can all relate to both of these conditions to some extent or the other.

Some of you are so weary from trying to live up to some artificial expectation or reality. You think if only I can live up to that person’s example, God will be pleased with me. You constructed in your mind this false reality of what it takes to please yourself or God.

The problem is not only do you fail to meet that goal when you do meet it you just move it even higher and it’s just this constant state of failing and it’s left you exhausted. It’s left you weary.

And Jesus in his most tender and kind voice says come to me. I am gentle and lowly in heart and I will give you rest.

You will never find rest in your own accomplishments. You will never find rest in your own works. You will only find rest in Jesus.

Some of you are heavy-laden. Life is particularly hard right now. I think this is true for all of us. Life is hard. Maybe your family is falling apart. Maybe school is a nightmare. Your friends have abandoned you. You are heavy laden and you’re tired. The pressures of this fallen world. The pressures of living up to everyone else expectations or your own expectations has left you burdened, worn out, broken down, and beat up.

I’d like to paraphrase a lengthy quote from the book Gentle and lowly.

The author writes, Jesus is speaking to those who are discouraged, the frustrated, the weary, the disenchanted, the cynical, the empty. Those running on fumes. Those whose Christian lives feel like constantly running up a descending escalator. Those of us who find ourselves thinking: “How could I mess up that bad—again?” It is for that increasing suspicion that God’s patience with us is wearing thin. For those of us who know God loves us but suspect we have deeply disappointed him. Who have told others of the love of Christ yet wonder if—as for us—he harbors mild resentment. Who wonder if we have shipwrecked our lives beyond what can be repaired. Who are convinced we’ve permanently diminished our usefulness to the Lord. Who have been swept off our feet by perplexing pain and are wondering how we can keep living under such numbing darkness. Who look at our lives and know how to interpret the data only by concluding that God is fundamentally cheap with his grace.

The sacred, broken, and unlovable.

And yet here Jesus bends his knee looks us in the eye and simply says, “Come, I am gentle in lowly in heart.” You are safe and you are loved in the arms of Jesus.

He tells us to come and take his yoke and to learn from him.

A yoke was made of wood and it was crafted to fit the neck and shoulders of an ox. It was part of the harness that was used to connect the ox to the the plow. Farmers in this time would connect two oxen to the same plow. Typically connecting a more mature ox with a younger immature ox and the older ox would help guide the younger ox as they would plow the field together. The younger ox would learn from the older ox.

But here Jesus is talking to the broken down, the beat up, the worn out and he says take my yoke and learn from me. Come tie yourself to me and I will teach you.

Now for those of you who are beaten down or worn out from trying to live up to the expectations you’ve set for you. The expectations that you think God has for you.

The idea of connecting yourself to Jesus taking his yoke may sound repulsive. You may flinch at the idea of taking his yoke. You can’t handle learning another thing. You can’t handle learning how you failed in another area. You can’t stomach learning about something else you have to do differently. You are already weary and heavy laden. The idea of taking Jesus’ yoke is just to much to bear. So you walk away from him.

But how does Jesus describe his yoke?

He says his yoke is easy and his burden is light.

That word easy needs to be understood carefully. It is the same word translated elsewhere as kind. Ephesians 4:32, says be kind tenderhearted to one another. That word kind is the same word in the Greek as easy in these verses.

So think about what Jesus is saying. That heavy bar that is used by oxen to plow the field. That thing that you are so terrified in your life to take. Jesus is saying it is kind. He’s using irony. He’s saying my yoke in a nonyoke. Because it is a yoke of kindness.

One author points out. It’s like telling a drowning man that he must put on the burden of a life preserver only to hear him shout back, sputtering, “No way! Not me! This is hard enough, drowning here in these stormy waters. The last thing I need is the added burden of a life preserver around my body!” That’s what we all are like, confessing Christ with our lips but generally avoiding deep fellowship with him, out of a muted understanding of his heart.

Jesus says his burden his light. The burden that Jesus has is a non-burden. What helium does to a balloon Jesus’ yoke does to his believers. It lifts us up and carries us in it’s everlasting kindness.

So if you are A Christian this morning afraid of Jesus’ yoke worrying that it is to much for you to bear then you do not understand the heart of Jesus. He is gentle and lowly and his yoke is kind.

If you leave reading your bible discouraged, then you’ve missed the heart of Jesus. If you leave this meltdown dejected then we have failed to show the heart of Christ.

Picture the illustration that Jesus gives. The strong, mature ox taking an immature ox in their yoke. But remember Jesus is not talking to immature people he’s talking to the weary and He is saying connect yourself to me and I will do the work. I will carry you along.

But you may say that is not the Christian life I know and it’s not even the Christian life I see in the Bible. Paul talks repeatedly about toiling and laboring and yet Jesus seems to say everything is easy and he’s promising rest.

Well remember the rest Jesus is promising is not rest for your bodies but rather rest for your souls. To follow Jesus is to endure hardships, endure difficulties. That will always be the case. To follow Jesus means risking your life and livelihood it means giving up our comforts.

The reason why we can risk everything for Jesus. The reason why we can give all our energy to Jesus, why we can risk our health, and give up our rights. Is because in Jesus we are promised a rest that no amount of work can exhaust. We a promised a life that no virus can kill. We are promised a freedom that no government can take away. We are promised a love that no failure can ruin.

There is a lot of behaviors I’ve seen in the last several years working with teens. These behaviors are sinful and they need to be repented of. There may be all kinds of things at the root of those behaviors. Maybe your selfish, proud, filled with lust. Which, let’s be honest, you probably are and you need to repent of those sins.

However, I am also becoming increasing convinced that maybe even more foundational to the sin I’ve witnessed in the lives of many people your age is nothing more than a scared child worrying for their safety and feeling unloved. And in that state of fear and unlove you have rebelled against the ways of God. You have rejected the God of the Bible because you do not understand the God of the Bible.

And this morning I want you to know that you are safe and loved. You are secure and cared for, because Jesus is gentle and lowly in heart. His yoke is easy and his burden is light.

Would you come to him this morning?

Last night I said I didn’t want you to do anything other than bask in this new love that we learned God has towards us. To breathe it in. Soak it up. Today however I want you to take that next step.

There is a sin that I am confident the Holy Spirit is bringing to your mind as we speak.

Would you take you counselor and repent of your sins and lay them at the foot of the cross? Would you come to the gentle and lowly Savior and admit the ways you have rebelled against him and accepted his offer of forgiveness?

Maybe your hurting. Maybe something has happened to you and you are suffering in private. Would you take you counseling and share with them what’s going on. Let them help lead you to Jesus.

You, who are weary and heavy laden, you, who are scared, who are broken, lonely, or tired come and find rest in the arms of your Savior.

I think many of us are worried that if we come to Jesus again. He will brush us aside. That he is tired of helping. Tired of dealing with us.

And yet in all of my sinfulness. In all of my fallen nature. When my little girl come running to me. Scared. Hurt. Sad. I do not brush her aside. I get on my knee. I open my arms and I embrace her. And she knows that she is safe, secured, and loved.

How much more does Jesus love you? How much more in his infinite kindness and patience does Jesus love you?

Jesus says in John 6, “All that the Father gives Me will come to Me, and the one who comes to Me I will by no means cast out.”

Would you come to Jesus today? Would you come to the one who joyfully went to the cross to save you from your sins? Would you come to the one who moved heaven and earth to be with you? Would you come to Jesus today he is gentle and lowly in heart?

There is nothing more that God wants then to see one of His children come home. There is joy in the heavens when a sinner repents. Would you do it today? He loves you.

Dane Ortlund writes, “Only as we drink down the kindness of the heart of Christ will we leave in our wake, everywhere we go, the aroma of heaven, and die one day having startled the world with glimpses of a divine kindness too great to be boxed in by what we deserve.”