Finding Faithful Friends

Give me your definition of a friend.

Erma Bombeck said, “A friend doesn’t go on a diet because you are fat.” Others have said, “A friend will go on liking you, no matter how successful either of you become,” and “A friend sees the best in you, even when you’re not showing it.”

Friends are those people who know us “warts and all” and love us anyway.

Few things in life will determine what kind of people we will become as the friends we choose. So Finding Faithful Friends is an important part of living wisely in a foolish world.

Text; Proverbs 18:24

Proverbs 18:24 NKJV

24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Proverbs 18:24 ESV

24 A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

These different translations are not a contradiction of the scriptures but a translation distinguishing the difference in the word friends/friend.

Friends (rea’) who are casual acquaintances, such as work associates or neighbors, and a friend (‘ahab) who truly loves and is committed to you regardless of circumstances.

Both translations of the scriptures are profitable to us and I want to look at them in their context.

1. Be Friendly; 24a [NKJV]

“A man who has friends must himself be friendly”

Be Real- be transparent and honest about who you are. Share your weaknesses, fears and mistakes but also be honest about our strengths. Paul was one of the most real friends to the church in the scriptures.

1 Corinthians 2:1–5 NKJV

1 And I, brethren, when I came to you, did not come with excellence of speech or of wisdom declaring to you the testimony of God. 2 For I determined not to know anything among you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified. 3 I was with you in weakness, in fear, and in much trembling. 4 And my speech and my preaching were not with persuasive words of human wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, 5 that your faith should not be in the wisdom of men but in the power of God.

Be Cheerful- have a good attitude and smile more! Take a minute and smile at someone around you. A smile can change circumstances. If you smile and make other people smile, you will have many friends and a happier life.

Proverbs 15:15 NKJV

15 All the days of the afflicted are evil, But he who is of a merry heart has a continual feast.

Proverbs 15:15 NLT

15 For the despondent, every day brings trouble; for the happy heart, life is a continual feast.

Be Generous with Praise- when a person feels appreciated, it brings out the best in them. Focus on people’s talents, honesty, loyalty, abilities, accomplishments, instead of only saying something to them when they fail.

Proverbs 12:25 NKJV

25 Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, But a good word makes it glad.

Proverbs 27:9 NKJV

9 Ointment and perfume delight the heart, And the sweetness of a man’s friend gives delight by hearty counsel.

Be Faithful- remaining loyal, steadfast and immovable to your core values and then to your friends.

You can be faithful to your friends without sticking to your core values/beliefs, and then you really aren’t a friend at all. Faithful friendship must have a solid foundation and it must be Jesus and His Word!

Proverbs 27:17 NKJV

17 As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.

2. Choosing Friends; 24a [NLT]

“A man of many companions may come to ruin”

The word companion/friends is acquaintances, neighbors or co-workers, instead of one who truly loves, cares for and is committed to you as a faithful friend.

When we choose friends we need to make sure they aren’t foolish in their ways. A fool is anyone who doesn’t put God first in his or her life or says in their heart there is no God. If we choose friends whose number one priority is anything other than pleasing God, we’ve made a mistake.

Proverbs 13:20 NKJV

20 He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.

Psalm 1:1 NKJV

1 Blessed is the man Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, Nor stands in the path of sinners, Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;

2 Corinthians 6:14–15 NKJV

14 Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?

Let’s do an exercise here to demonstrate this; “Everybody lift your arms, now let them down.” Which is easier, lifting them or letting them down?

It’s the same in relationships. If we make friends with fools, it’s a lot easier for them to pull us down morally than it is for us to pull them up!

Proverbs 12:26 NKJV

26 The righteous should choose his friends carefully, For the way of the wicked leads them astray.

3. A Friend Closer than a Brother; 24b

As humans, family is very important to us as it should be. But it is possible to have a friend (a non-relative) who is more loyal and committed to you than a brother (a blood relative).

Jesus is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. No one loves or cares about us more than Jesus, and He proves it everyday. I want to share scripture on what Jesus has done and continues to do for us daily.

John 15:13 NKJV

13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.

John 15:15 NKJV

15 No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you.

John 16:13–14 NKJV

13 However, when He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come. 14 He will glorify Me, for He will take of what is Mine and declare it to you.

Ephesians 1:3 NKJV

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ,

Romans 8:35–39 NKJV

35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36 As it is written: “For Your sake we are killed all day long; We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.” 37 Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. 38 For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, 39 nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Hebrews 13:5b (NKJV)

5 For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Hebrews 13:8 NKJV

8 Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

Matthew 28:20b (NKJV)

20 and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen.

Close;

Companions, friends and acquaintances come and go in different seasons of our life. When circumstances change in us, often they fade away. But a true friend is there with you in the deepest valleys and the darkest nights. They will be there for you at any cost. True friends have a devotion to each other that span time and distance. True friends are rare in life, so we should treasure them.

Jesus is a true friend who sets the standard for us to be friendly and also of how we need to choose friends.