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Loving At Home Matthew 22: 15 – 40

Matthew 22:15–40 KJV 1900

Then went the Pharisees, and took counsel how they might entangle him in his talk. And they sent out unto him their disciples with the Herodians, saying, Master, we know that thou art true, and teachest the way of God in truth, neither carest thou for any man: for thou regardest not the person of men. Tell us therefore, What thinkest thou? Is it lawful to give tribute unto Caesar, or not? But Jesus perceived their wickedness, and said, Why tempt ye me, ye hypocrites? Shew me the tribute money. And they brought unto him a penny. And he saith unto them, Whose is this image and superscription? They say unto him, Caesar’s. Then saith he unto them, Render therefore unto Caesar the things which are Caesar’s; and unto God the things that are God’s. When they had heard these words, they marvelled, and left him, and went their way. The same day came to him the Sadducees, which say that there is no resurrection, and asked him, Saying, Master, Moses said, If a man die, having no children, his brother shall marry his wife, and raise up seed unto his brother. Now there were with us seven brethren: and the first, when he had married a wife, deceased, and, having no issue, left his wife unto his brother: Likewise the second also, and the third, unto the seventh. And last of all the woman died also. Therefore in the resurrection whose wife shall she be of the seven? for they all had her. Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God. For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven. But as touching the resurrection of the dead, have ye not read that which was spoken unto you by God, saying, I am the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob? God is not the God of the dead, but of the living. And when the multitude heard this, they were astonished at his doctrine. But when the Pharisees had heard that he had put the Sadducees to silence, they were gathered together. Then one of them, which was a lawyer, asked him a question, tempting him, and saying, Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.

It is the last question that I would like to focus on this morning. The two greatest commandments. It is important to understand that love is a matter of choice. If love were a feeling or an accident, then God couldn’t command it. He wouldn’t command us to do something that was just a feeling, but He can command an action in our lives. We ought to obey the command of the Lord.

The two greatest commandments of God are to Love:

1- Love God 2 – To love others.

Our society is focused on this psychological babble adding a dangerous third commandment, “love yourself.” When the Lord said, “Love your neighbor as yourself He was stressing the intensity or devotedness of love, that is , the amount and quality of loving concern that one has for his neighbor, not upon its content. He is simply referring to the fervency and genuineness of the love. He is not commanding self-love. Self-love is not a biblical concept in Scripture: Read I Jn 4: 1

1 John 4:1 KJV 1900

Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.

The Lord said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”

He said, “Seek ye first the kingdom of God & His righteousness & all of these things shall be added unto you.” The Bible takes the position that men already love themselves far too well.

The phrase is repeated in Eph. 5 where Paul urges husbands to love their wives as they love their own bodies. Paul does not intend to say that husbands must first learn how to love their own bodies before they can love their wives. NO. He assumes (as does Christ) that men already love themselves. As a matter of fact, he said, “No one ever hated his own flesh, but nourisheth and cherisheth it.” What is being said is “Do good for your wife with the same devotion and zeal that you exhibit in doing good for yourself.”

The only identity I need to have self-worth is based on this fact: I am a child of God. That’s enough identity for any man or woman. For the Christian the identity crisis is over. Identity is found in Christ. When I discover who I am in Christ, then and only then, can I realize why I am here on this earth. Why, am I here? To love myself. No to love God and others. I can apply those 2 simple commands hundreds of times a day.

I. Steps in Loving God

A. Salvation - The first step in loving God is getting saved.

B. Trust & Obey Psalm 37:3 “Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.”

II. Love Others, I Jn. 4:11-21

1 John 4:11–21 KJV 1900

Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us. Hereby know we that we dwell in him, and he in us, because he hath given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and do testify that the Father sent the Son to be the Saviour of the world. Whosoever shall confess that Jesus is the Son of God, God dwelleth in him, and he in God. And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him. Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world. There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. We love him, because he first loved us. If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also.

A. Love One Another

1. The lost, v. 11 - most loving thing I can do for a lost person is introduce them to Christ.

B. Love Casts out Fear

2. The saved How do you love the saved?

Edify & Encourage

III. Defining Love

The Hollywood and Playboy views of love, marriage, and immorality permeate our society. These philosophies quickly filter down into homes in a thousand ways. Hollywood, ever since its beginning, has taught a pagan philosophy of love. The philosophy is that love “happens.” Love is not something to work at; it just happens. Love comes full blown from Cupid or the false god Aphrodite. It’s the kind of thing that just is or isn’t. It isn’t something that you develop, it isn’t something that grows, it isn’t something that you work hard to achieve, it isn’t a thinking thing, & it certainly isn’t something that you can will. It is something that happens. And when it happens, it happens in such a way that you know that it has happened! How do you know it happens?

Because:

It bowls you over You hear music

You see wonderful lights A near psychedelic experience

Or, you feel these 2 guys named Goosebumps running up & down your spine at 90 mph.

Such love seems wonderful, but what happens when the happening no longer happens? What happens when the happening is over? What happens when the sounds sound muffled, and the colors turn gray? What happens when the feeling dies, the embers grow cold, & the lights go out? What happens to a Hollywood-type marriage based on feeling when husband & wife begin to feel less feeling? What happens when one or the other begins to have growing feelings for someone else?

* The Playboy philosophy of love is getting, what happens when the person stops giving to me. What happens when an accident, illness, or disease destroys the body of the one you used to love? That’s it. When there’s no more nectar in the flower, the bee must flit to the next, and the next, and then to the one after that. Hollywood has taught this, too, not only by film but also by the way in which so many of the stars themselves have been notorious flower flitters. If mom is to dress like the stars, style her hair like the stars, and make up her face like the stars, why shouldn’t she also hitch her marriage to a star?

You have to understand everyone is for love. But what is love? The hippies were for love, the Rock musicians are for love, the followers of Hare Krishna are for love, Christians are for love. But it is true of love, as it is of heaven, that “everybody talks about it ain’t got it.”

What then is Biblical love?

A. One Word definition:

Giving. Giving of oneself to another. It is not getting as the world says today. It is not feeling and desire; it is not something over which one has no control. It is something that one does for another.

God is our model of love:

- Christ loved the church & gave Himself for it, Eph. 5:25

Ephesians 5:25 KJV 1900

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

- God so loved the world that He gave, Jn. 3:16

John 3:16 KJV 1900

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

- He loved me & gave Himself for me, Gal. 2:20

Galatians 2:20 KJV 1900

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

- If your enemy hungers, feed him, if he thirsts, give him a drink, Rms. 12:20.

B. Simple Definition:

The fulfillment of God’s commandments, John 14:15.

* Love is not first a feeling, but rather a giving of oneself to another. Feelings follow. True love is always under control. It is commanded. Christ commands, “Love your enemies.” You can’t sit around making up a good feeling for your enemies. It doesn’t come that way. But if you give an enemy something to eat or give him something to drink, soon something begins to happen to your feelings. When you invest yourself in another, you begin to feel differently toward them. Where your treasure is there will your heart be also. The feelings that develop out of giving are genuine & lasting. But feelings as the base of love are fickle. Feelings are not dependable; they are up one day, down the next. Feelings are not always under control, but true love is. The Bible commands, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, body, & soul, & strength; love your neighbor as yourself, & love your enemies.”

C. Expanded Definition:

Love is a relationship conditioned upon responsibility, that is, responsible observance of the commandments of God.

The Scriptures, not one’s personal experience, tell us what constitutes love to another. You cannot go wrong when you love someone in a biblical manner. What is the most eloquent definition of love? I Cor. 13. I ask couples who want to marry to memorize & practice biblical love as defined by I Cor. 13 & Eph. 4:32.

Concl - Men, if there is no love in your home, it is your fault. The major responsibility for love in the home falls not on the wife (though she should show love, of course), but on the husband. The husband must love his wife as Christ loved the church. If love has grown cold in the family, men you need to do something about it. Follow the model of the Lord Jesus Christ. You are the head of your home, introduce love. You must begin by giving. You must give your time, your interest, your money, yourself. Plan to do something specific for your wife each day this week. If your wife, fails to return your love, you are still to give. Your love can permeate all. Love demands change. God commands love & love does not come naturally but must be learned. It is also a fruit of the Spirit that God is producing in me as I submit to God & let His Spirit control me.