iLife Series Part 1: iForgive

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In iLife Part 1, we talk about the importance of forgiveness in the life of a believer.

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Transcript
*Next week I want to encourage everyone who has a favorite football team to wear you team’s jersey, tshirt, etc. as we will be having a special Super Bowl message.
Introduction:
Ephesians 4:1 CSB
Therefore I, the prisoner in the Lord, urge you to walk worthy of the calling you have received,
We talked a couple of weeks ago about “What is the Church” (last week) about how we are to love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind and strength and to love our neighbor as ourself. We also discussed that the word “love” means to willingly lay down your rights and privileges for the good and benefit of another. And the word “neighbor” means anyone that you come in contact with.
This week we are going to begin our series “iLife” which deals with our we interact with others. So how are we as believers supposed to interact with others? Well, there are many statements and commands in the Bible that tell us and they are commonly known as the “one anothers”.
There are so many that I am only going to pick a few or else we would be in this series for months! So, for the next few weeks we will be talking about God’s rules for our relationships with others.
Rules are nothing new. We all have rules. We’ve all grown up with rules. We have rules for driving (learners permit), using technology (“Don’t give out your password. Don’t open e-mails from a sender that says, ‘Bob, the horny guy,’” or “My name is Larissa and I want to have fun.'), back up your data (hard drives don’t last forever). You learn rules from your family. You learned rules on your own.
But what I want to do over the next few weeks is to consider some different rules. And the rules that we’re going to talk about have to do with relationships.
We’ve learned some relational rules as well over the years that we just picked up.
Some good rules: treat people the way you would like to be treated. And we’ve also picked up some bad rules: do unto others before they have a chance to do unto you!
In studying the Bible, God has some incredible relational rules. He designed us to work best in the midst of relationships. In God’s creation, of who you and I are, in our DNA, we are relational beings. We’re wired for relationships.
God wants us to enjoy life and everything life has to offer!
John 10:10 CSB
10 A thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come so that they may have life and have it in abundance.
In order to do that, we need to make a choice. We can base our relationships on the world’s rules/ways or we can base our relationships on God’s rules/ways because we know He wants what’s best for us.
This week we are going to talk about “iForgive.”
Ephesians 4:32 CSB
And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.
Dr. Karl Menninger, a well-known psychiatrist, once said that if he "could convince the patients in psychiatric hospitals that their sins were forgiven, 75 percent of them could walk out the next day."
John Hopkins reported: “62 percent of American adults say they need more forgiveness in their personal lives, according to a survey by the nonprofit Fetzer Institute.”
What do we know about forgiveness?
Why do we forgive? Because God first forgave us?
Let’s look at God’s Word to see what God says about forgiveness.
I also want to mention that I will include some information that I have read and gleaned from Dr. Bruce Wilkinson and John Bevere.
Let’s turn to Matthew 18:
Body:
Matthew 18:21 NKJV
21 Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?”
“Brother” here means another person.
Peter was hoping for a huge surprise and congrats from Jesus because of his answer. But Jesus responds:
Matthew 18:22 NKJV
22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.
Wow! Now Jesus had a great way to teach and share truth by using parables. Parables were fictional stories that one would use that would hid the answer or truth in it until it was revealed at the end and it was usually a surprise or shocking ending. Jesus does the same here to explain to us and Peter why we should forgive up to 70 times 7:
Matthew 18:23–34 NKJV
23 Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. 25 But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made. 26 The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, ‘Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ 27 Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. 28 “But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, ‘Pay me what you owe!’ 29 So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ 30 And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. 31 So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done. 32 Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. 33 Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’ 34 And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him.
The kingdom of heaven = the way the kingdom of heaven works with earth (v23)
First man couldn’t pay it all as it was impossible because it was too much (v24)
He fell on his knees and asked for compassion (v26)
The king was moved with compassion and forgave him (v27)
Unforgiveness is wicked (you wicked servant) (v32)
Delivered him to the torurers until all that was due him (v34)
Here’s the truth reveal at the end of the story and Jesus pulls back the veil between heaven and earth and shows us what will happen to someone who doesn’t forgive (v35)
Matthew 18:35 NKJV
35 “So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”
In other words, Jesus is telling Peter and us, “You forgive 70x7 because my Heavenly Father will do the same to you until you forgive.”
The form in the Greek for the word “forgive” in verse 35 means “a point in time.” Not points in time. You forgive once. Not over and over again.
And it gets worse with each person (torture gets worse and life doesn’t make sense whether physically, mentally, financially relationally emotionally because most of the time the root is unforgiveness)
Not all torture is from unforgiveness but Dr. Bruce Wilkinson believes it can be 60-80%.
Many times we don’t know that we are being tortured because we don’t think we need to forgive anyone.
God doesn’t torture you but delivers you to the torturers.
What does “torture” mean here? Greek word here is “Basanizo” which means to cause another person distress or suffering
The same word is found throughout Scripture and here are a two of them:
Matthew 8:5–6 NKJV
Now when Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to Him, pleading with Him, saying, “Lord, my servant is lying at home paralyzed, dreadfully tormented.”
Physical torment
2 Peter 2:7–8 NKJV
and delivered righteous Lot, who was oppressed by the filthy conduct of the wicked (for that righteous man, dwelling among them, tormented his righteous soul from day to day by seeing and hearing their lawless deeds)—
Emotional torment
Illustrations:
Unforgiveness like a wound on arm cf to heart (Bruce Wilkinson)
What the guys at TC are saying “I thought I forgave my mom but i realize I only pushed it aside and didn’t want to deal with it” and “I understand now why certain people rub me the wrong way because they remind me of someone I haven’t forgiven.”
There is a window of grace when someone has been wounded severely or traumatically and they need time to process and work through the event
There is a season of childhood that is different for every person and only God knows when a person is held accountable for their actions of right and wrong.
How do I forgive someone?
Open your heart (v35)
Extend compassion to the person you need to forgive (vv 27,33) (this can be done to you like someone begging you or you can choose to do it)
Release the person from your inner heart prison (v27)
Forgive each trespass, offense, mistake, sin and wound (vv 27, 32, 35) (list)
Matthew 18:27–35 NKJV
27 Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. 28 “But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, ‘Pay me what you owe!’ 29 So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ 30 And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. 31 So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done. 32 Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. 33 Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’ 34 And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. 35 “So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”
Ephesians 4:1 CSB
Therefore I, the prisoner in the Lord, urge you to walk worthy of the calling you have received,
Colossians 3:12–13 CSB
12 Therefore, as God’s chosen ones, holy and dearly loved, put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a grievance against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you are also to forgive.
Conclusion:
Is there someone you need to forgive this morning?
Are you ready to decide to forgive them today?
Are you willing to offer them compassion?
Are you willing to release them from your heart prison?
Are you willing to forgive each trespass, etc.?
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