Lesson 9--Ephesians 4:17-32--Clothes, New and Old

Introduction

Do you have clothes that no longer fit you?

Most do, and they tend to hold onto them for one reason. "I might get back into them one day." But we all know we never do. Instead, they take up space.

It's time to get rid of the old clothes.

Paul would agree with that. In fact, he instructs the Ephesians to do just that. But the Christians are not to go to their closets and declutter. They are to open their lives and clean them out.

As we come to this lesson, it has a single big idea. God's new plan in the church requires new people, not old ones.

If God's plan is to succeed, we must examine our own lives.

Discussion

The Gentile Life

It was a huge step when the Gentiles at Ephesus were converted to Christ. They were leaving a religion, a way of life, and a culture that had shaped their lives from birth.

Now, they were God's children. How were they to live?

This is Paul's monumental challenge. How do you take Gentiles and put them into a church, so they live in a way that reflects Christ and his ways?

He begins this discussion in verse 17.

"Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds." (Ephesians 4:17, ESV)

Paul is serious. His language says that God is hearing his words and instructions. What he tells them has the gravitas for their lives and the lives of the church.

They are to "no longer walk as Gentiles do."

We met the word in the first verse of this chapter, which forms the driving point of the last three chapters.

"I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called," (Ephesians 4:1, ESV)

Portraying daily living as a walk has a distinct spin. Walking is not just an activity but a direction. Paul is asking the Gentiles and everyone to ask a simple question. What direction is your life headed?

We should never overlook that the daily activities of life will decide where we end. The destination is determined daily. For the Gentiles, they must consider it, but all must.

Paul begins not with behavior but their thinking. Thinking is the seed that grows life. Our minds create intention, which is then lived in life. If you don't change your thinking, you cannot change your behavior.

Their minds had created a life of nothingness. It was aimless and led nowhere worth going. A life without the meaning God intends breeds despair that crushes the soul.

"They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart." (Ephesians 4:18, ESV)

Paul uses three phrases to emphasize this worthless thinking that has driven their life.

He says their minds are darkened. Their condition is a mind trapped in a way that cannot see a light to lead them in the right direction.

Second, he says they were alienated from God due to ignorance. Their state was total separation from God. Even if they could have seen the light, their mind was not prepared to grasp its importance. This inability to open your eyes to truth erects a wall between a man and God.

Finally, he tells the Gentiles that it flowed from a hardness of heart.

The image is prevalent through scripture. It described the stubborn Pharaoh who refused to let Israel God. Stephen had called the Jewish leaders "hardened."

This, too, is a medical term referring to calcification. When I was a boy, older people died from "hardening of the arteries." The only way they knew to explain what we know now is a build-up of a fatty substance in the artery wall that shuts off blood flow. The common name is a heart attack.

When you cannot open your heart because it is so calloused, you cannot approach God.

This darkened, closed-minded, calloused way of thinking produced something.

"They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity." (Ephesians 4:19, ESV)

Paul describes a life of "callousness," which is a result. Think about a piece of skin that grows hard and calloused. It doesn't feel pain any longer. It has lost sensation because of the tough hide.

Lives become that way. It is not attractive when the apostle describes a life devoid of guilt or shame. It is unrestrained without boundaries of right or wrong. All life is determined by getting what I want when I want it regardless of the cost to another. It is gutter living at its worst, rolling in the filth of sin and not caring about its odor.

In short, when a person rejects God, there will come a time when they cannot see what is wrong in their lives and cannot feel the guilt or shame associated with it.

It is crucial, for instance, when a child starts telling falsehoods that they are admonished and punished. If ignored, it will be easier the next time until any associated feeling of remorse is gone.

That is the condition Paul's world and ours found themselves in.

Remember the question of this first part is, "what direction is your life headed?

A Changed Life

In verse 20, Paul slaps them with the reality of their change.

"But that is not the way you learned Christ!— assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus," (Ephesians 4:20–21, ESV)

What they were taught and learned in Christ was not the same. A lifestyle that marked a Gentile did not fit with the teaching and life of Jesus Christ.

If you lived it, something was out of sync.

A more practical issue presents itself. Remember, Paul is encouraging the unity of the church. He is concerned with the differences in background. Lingering in this passage is "how do you keep people who get irritated with each other from splitting the seams of the church?"

He gives the pathway in verse 22:

"to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires," (Ephesians 4:22, ESV)

He tells them to take off their old clothes. His language is dramatic and decisive. Once and for all, take off that old life that doesn't fit now.

Paul is not telling them to alter their life, to make some life hacks to improve them. He says it is removal.

When I was a boy, a constant staple at our house was iron-on patches. I suppose every boy has a sense that a new pair of jeans needs to be "broken in," and part of that was busting out the knee. (If my mother had known how much ratty-looking jeans cost, she might have encouraged the practice.)

But we did not get new jeans when the knees were torn. Instead, my mother got out the iron and ironing board and sewed a patch on the split. It seemed there was no end to patching.

Paul doesn't believe in iron-on patches for the soul. It needs an entirely new pair.

The reason is the old life is a filthy one. You don't want to contaminate the fresh with the foul.

On the African continent, the disease of Ebola is a killer. Once a person is infected, they remove his clothes and burn them. They are not able to be reclaimed and worn again.

That is the sense that Paul uses. He says to get rid of that old life and burn it because it is useless and infected.

Then, he describes what happens in its place.

"and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness." (Ephesians 4:23–24, ESV)

Listen to the words—renewed, new, created. They breathe freshness.

Paul says all of a Christian's life is a constant state of renewal. It is growing fresh and clean each day.

And he says, just as you took off the old life, you put on a new self, on appropriate for the lifestyle of Christianity.

Verse 23 is the positive side of verse 22. As you took off old, filthy clothes, you put on new tailor-made clothes.

The "adornment" issue the likeness of God. Just as the first creation made man in "his likeness," the new creation is also in his likeness. It is doing what is right in all circumstances and being distinct from the culture around it.

Why is this important? It has a practical purpose.

Unity in God's kingdom is based on God's children becoming like him. The only way to truly achieve unity is for everyone to go to the same goal, to live in God's spiritual likeness.

But what does that look like on a daily level?

It is easy to talk about platitudes of righteousness and holiness. But unless it takes on the dress, it remains nothing more than a theological discussion over a Starbucks coffee.

What is the difference between new clothes and old clothes? Paul lines it out in ways that are hard to miss. These new clothes made by God demand things of us as we live together.

Everything else Paul says in this lesson lends itself to unity. Unity in the church requires a change in how we deal with each other.

Be Truthful

"Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another." (Ephesians 4:25, ESV)

The first is to start being honest with those close to you, your brothers and sisters.

We would think this is a "duh" command, but it is deeper than that. Putting away falsehood includes many things.

One is to not try to manipulate people to your view. We tell people what they want to hear so they will like us or so we can lead them to a place where we get our way. That's manipulation.

Life in the church must be open and transparent. Motives should be clear, and the attitude must be humble. We cannot help each other if we hide from each other what we see. It doesn't mean you are brutal, but we kindly tell the truth.

But it also includes the humility to hear the truth. Some people do not want to know. They think they do or believe they do. But they would rather live in denial. Honesty is always a two-way street.

The reason is we are "members one of another." What hurts you hurts me. When I refuse to be truthful, it hurts both of us. Too many times, we tell church leaders what we think they want to hear. We sometimes want to protect ourselves more than serve the body. Nothing positive can be done for the body until church leaders hear what people actually think.

Don't Harbor A Grudging Attitude

The second behavior is a grudging attitude.

"Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil." (Ephesians 4:26–27, ESV)

Paul alludes to a passage in Psalm 4:4. It is essential to hear what he says, not what we think.

Anger is a human emotion. It is like a gauge on a car's dashboard that tells you something is wrong. Those who say, "never get angry," are perpetually angry. That is what Paul says here.

The time to be angry is when there is injustice when innocents are harmed. Yet, it can lead to sin.

To understand how you have to thumb through Paul's Greek lexicon. As with the term love, Greek had different terms for anger. Sometimes it was like a flash fire that flares up and then away.

But that's not what Paul is discussing in this verse.

Here this picture is of a smoldering fire.

Several years ago, the house across the street from us caught fire one night. The fire was put out with a full contingent of firemen with hoses. Yet, the next day, two firemen were still on the scene.

The reason was simple, just because you don't see fire doesn't mean it is not there. Hotspots can flare up at unknown times.

This vers describes what we call a grudge. It is always irritation under the surface. Every slight offense is a poker to keep the embers living in the heart white-hot. The longer it remains, the more it is nursed and fed.

Grudges feed hurts and makes minor irritations huge problems. Then, at an unpredictable moment, it flares up. Angry moods can smile through clenched teeth. Grudges use darts of sarcasm to wound.

Paul says you need to settle problems with people quickly. Fire extinguished doesn't hurt us. A fire ignored destroys. The longer we put off a quarrel, the less likely it will be settled.

And the devil knows well that the best foothold he has in a church is disgruntled Christians. He can exploit that to divide churches and brethren.

If you have a problem with a brother, go and work it out. It will be the most terrifying and most satisfying thing you will do. Over time, you will realize most people never intended what you thought they did. That is true of marital issues as well as church fusses.

Plutarch, the Greek historian, tells us that the disciples of Pythagoras had a rule of their society that if, during the day, anger had made them speak insultingly to each other, before the sun set they shook hands and kissed each other and were reconciled. A Jewish Rabbi prayed that he might never go to sleep with any bitter thought against a fellow human being within his mind.

The best way not to have a grudge is to settle differences quickly. Or, as one person has said, "when we go to the grave, we need to not have any longstanding accounts with people."

Be Givers, not Takers

Verse 28 seems evident on its face, but Paul's deeper meaning is what is vital to hear.

"Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need." (Ephesians 4:28, ESV)

The fundamental core of a civilized society is respect for people and what they own. We should not take what belongs to another. It is something a child learns early with the shrill shriek of "mine."

Paul is more insistent than that. He doesn't want them to keep stealing. Instead, he wants them to learn to work for a living and earn funds that can be shared with the needy.

In the church, we need givers, not takers. People usually fall into one of three categories.

There are the takers who want to be blessed. They want to enjoy the comforts of a church building, the friendship of others, and the church's support. But they don't want to give back. They don't give money, and they don't provide support. They are the ones that cry the loudest when they get ignored.

Second, are the maintainers. They operate in a barter system. I will scratch your back, and you will scratch mine. They are always looking to make sure they get enough and give enough to balance the books. No more, no less.

Finally, there are givers. Givers visit hospitals and give encouragement. They never ask for themselves but look to the needs of other people. They volunteer for every job and teach classes all the time.

Paul wants Christians to be givers and not takers. Our minds should look to the needs of others and find ways to make the body a better place.

Build Up, Not Tear Down

When my daughter was at Abilene Christian University, she took a class her parents took called Family Relations taught by Carl Brecheen and Paul Faulkner.

One day she emailed us and said she had an assignment for the class. She had to find out what her parents' favorite verses in the Bible were. Mine is found in verse 29:

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." (Ephesians 4:29, ESV)

Corrupting talk is far more than foul language. It is putrid and disgusting. Some talk just dumps the trash into another's life. It is filled with gripes, complaints, and criticisms.

Paul says, don't let that come out of your mouth. Instead, let your words be lifting and full of grace. Make sure they build someone up, not tear them down.

Someone has given three good rules for the words that come out of our minds.

Does this need to be said? Does this need to be said by me? Does this need to be said by me now?

The mouth is a marvelous instrument that can be used to praise God and destroy men. Decide how it will be used.

Paul says that nothing creates so much grief in God's Spirit as the tearing down of a brother or sister. Nothing gives so much joy as lifting them up.

What's coming out of your mouth?

Put Away Crabbiness

In verse 31, Paul uses a combination of words to paint his picture.

"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice." (Ephesians 4:31, ESV)

These describe the lifestyle of the cranky and crabby, someone upset and unsettled.

Bitterness frets over life and others to keep them in a state of perpetual animosity. That state provides the fodder for harsh and unloving opinions of men and things. Crabby people complain about everything with a scowl on their faces and a tongue that spits venomous criticism of everything around them.

While Paul has spoken of the slow-roasting form of anger, here he refers to wrath. We've all known people who explode from time to time and say, "I feel so much better." I am glad they do because no one else feels good after one of their outbursts. That is the flashpoint.

This cranky attitude creates the constant stirring up of people and keeps them in an uproar. They gossip about people, thinking they are the only perfect ones.

It produces a silent hatred that the person can easily dismiss, but it is evident to all who meet them.

Give Others What God Gives You

The final verse of this lesson provides the positive to many of the negatives. It begins with "instead." Here is what to do in place of crabbiness, selfishness, grudge-bearing, and verbal garbage.

"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." (Ephesians 4:32, ESV)

The traits of the verse are like rain on a dry day. They quench and cool. These are the traits of Christians weaving their lives together.

They help others while at the same time looking for the best in others. They cut others the same slack they want to be shown when wronged.

In short, he says to treat others as well as God has treated you. Did God give you grace? Does he invade your sleep with all the wrong things you have done during the day? Does God harp on flaws and shortcomings? Does God demean you to others? Does he overlook the little slips of life? Does he forgive?

If God has done that for you and me, why can we not reciprocate ?The worst condemnation is for God to say I treated you as my child while you treated my child as dirt.

Conclusion

Churches languish or thrive based on the atmosphere.

You have been to places where the emotional temperature makes you think you have stepped into an igloo. A crisis always is brewing, and people are looking for the sin in others. Members enjoy putting down those in other churches or those who don't see life as they do. They don't want to instruct, just complain.

Then, I've settled in the pew of some churches and knew that God was here because you saw him in the people's lives in the pew. They were sweet, forgiving, helpful. And when you watched them, you wanted to be a better Christian because you were with them.

The only way church can be bound together is for members to be the strands woven together and pull together.

So, here is a simple question we all need to ask regularly: If someone came into the church and met you, what would they think about the church?