VIP

The ONE

Connect: Hey Everyone! Tonight we are going to do something a bit different. Usually, I would speak for about 15 minutes about what it means to have a godly relationship. But tonight, I’m gonna let you guys do the talking and tell me about relationships.

But, I will give you a few prompts and I wanna see some hands go up if you agree or disagree, then if you agree or disagree, you have to explain your reasoning.

We will let those who disagree talk first and then whoever agrees can talk next. Then I will give my 2 cents on the issue. Does that seem like a plan?

Ok so we are going to start right away with the first Prompt

1. I BELIEVE THE BIBLE SETS THE RIGHT STANDARDS FOR EVERY RELATIONSHIP.

If you disagree raise your hand, now if you agree raise your hand.

*Bring up one of each who agreed and disagreed.

Allow the person who disagrees talk first for 2 minutes, uninterrupted.

IF possible ask questions for more explanations

Allow the other person to respond and ask questions to them.

Thank you guys for your input! Now do you agree or disagree, get into small groups and have a chat for about 5 minutes.

So let me now, stop and give some information.

Why does the Bible set the right standards for every relationship?

2 Timothy (Chapter 3:16-17)

16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.

The Bible is not just another book on the shelf, It is actually inspired by God. When we say inspired, we mean that God’s Spirit influenced the writer’s of the Bible to say what it says. They still wrote in their own tones, they still wrote with their own personalities, but all of their words were inspired by God. Therefore, it is truth. Absolute truth. It sets the standards that go beyond time and goes beyond our natural desires.

Hebrews 13:8 (ESV)

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

Another reason I believe the Bible sets the right standards is because Jesus is never changing. All because he said something 2000 years ago, doesn’t mean it loses its value in time. Jesus never changes, neither does the things that He says.

Matthew 5:27–28 (ESV)

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Here is one of these standards. Don’t even look at a someone with sexual intentions. Jesus’ desire for mankind is to be pure in their relationships. So if something in your relationship is feeding your cravings to do something sexually with the person you are with or even to yourself, you are breaking one of these standards that God has set for us so that we could be pure.

So we can look at the Bible and be confident that God’s Word sets good standards that have our best interest in mind. God has our best interests in mind!

NEXT PROMPT

2. I NEED TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP TO BE HAPPY

DEBATE:

& SMALL GROUP DEBATE

Philippians 4:11–13 (ESV)

Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Just for clarity, it’s important to note that Paul wasn’t writing to a group of athletes when he wrote this, he wasn’t writing to people who were getting ready to take a difficult test they forgot to study for, he was writing to a group of people who struggling in their faith, whether it was persecution or if it was personal doubt and anxiety about their situations.

Paul makes it clear, that this idea of being content comes from Jesus, and not from other people. Now that doesn’t mean that being in a relationship isn’t supposed to make you happy. What we need to understand is that your relationship should not be the source of your happiness.

What happens when the person you’re with ticks you off. DUMP EM? It would seem right because if a relationship is supposed to make you happy, what happens when you aren’t happy with that person anymore? You get rid of em and try for another. But that’s not right. If that’s correct, no one would get married.

Listen to me:

Don’t let your relationship be like a water fountain that flows with happiness. You’ll end up clinging so closely to it, you won’t see happiness in anything else. You might even be with someone toxic and abusive, but because they make you “happy” you’ll find every excuse to stay with them.

Look at me, listen: Stop that. Leave. You’re better than that. You’re more valuable than that. Understand?

You can find contentment and happiness in other places, but until you find that in Jesus Christ, you will never experience true joy.

Don’t let your relationship be your only place you can find happiness.

Find contentment in your life through Jesus. Then experience happiness through a relationship.

NEXT STATEMENT:

3. IF MY PARENTS ARE OK WITH LEAVING MY PARTNER AND I BY OURSELVES, I SHOULD BE OK WITH IT TOO.

DEBATE:

SMALL GROUP DEBATE:

INFO:

This statement goes back to the whole standards conversation. Why do you want to be left alone? What are your intentions for being by yourselves? What kind of conversations do you need to have by yourselves? What will those conversations lead? We can make up every excuse in the book to find a reason to be by ourselves. You just have to be honest enough to say that you want to do something sexual with the person you are with.

You might not say it, but you might be thinking it.

Here’s my response to this phrase.

Your parent’s decision on what is right or wrong does not dominate God’s standards. - Say it again. Let them know I said this.

All because your parents are ok with leaving you by yourselves, doesn’t make it ok.

We are meant to keep ourselves pure for the person we want to marry because that is the person who becomes one with you.

You can say all day that you love someone, but if the Bible says love is patient, and you don’t wanna wait for marriage to have sex, the truth of the matter is that your sexual activity with that person is not done out of love, it is done out of desire.

We can be real and say we desire it. We have to be real, otherwise we are just fooling ourselves. But we have to set boundaries with the people we decide to date. We have to