When You Feel Like Poo

Alright, dudes. We’ve got a tough task here. I have about 15-20 minutes here to talk about something that nobody probably wants to talk about but we all struggle with.

Oh, you probably thought I was talking about lust didn’t you? Nope. Not this time. I’m not even quite sure how to summarize what we are talking about. I think we’ll just call it “depression, anxiety, fear, worry, feeling like crap, hating yourself, or just feeling a whole bunch of confusing thoughts and emotions that you have no idea what to do with.” That’s what we’ll call it.

Now here is why we don’t want to talk about this and we’re going to want to make jokes—sometimes dark and sarcastic jokes…I do that at times when I get really uncomfortable....but we don’t want to talk about this because it does make us uncomfortable.

One, if somebody else is sharing their heart it kind of weirds us out because we don’t know what to do with it. “Bro, that just got real serious really fast.”

Secondly, we don’t like to talk about this stuff because it makes us feel weak. It can be kind of embarrassing. And there is a good chance that we’ve even tried before and ended up getting “bro, that got serious...”

We can also feel like emotions and stuff are girly and so we need to shove them away and talk about football or cows or killing an animal or doing something awesome on a video game.

For those of you who are in church and call yourselves a follower of Jesus sometimes you don’t want to talk about this stuff because you feel like maybe it’s wrong to feel the way you do, and that other people might judge you, and so you stay silent. Sadly, sometimes parents, leaders, pastors, etc. can join in the freak out campaign too and when you talk it seems like it only makes things worse.

And so what happens is that when we suffer we don’t have really good places to talk about this stuff…we stay silent and then it just eats us up. But suicide is now the second leading cause of death for teenagers. 1 in 5 will have a major depressive episode within a year.

So we need to talk about this. Here is how you listen to this. If you are someone who struggles with feeling a whole bunch of confusing emotions and thoughts and sometimes it catches up with you and feel really bad about yourself or really sad or you start having really dark thoughts or you think about wanting to hurt yourself or any of those things…then you can listen with ears of interest. Maybe you can get one little nugget of help.

Or if you are thinking…man, this guy is so dumb and this is the most ridiculous thing that I’ve heard all night…what a sissy talking about feelings…what a downer…what a boring dude trying to bum us out. I’d just encourage you to listen for a friend. Good chance that you’re going to have somebody in your life who struggles with this. Don’t be a jerk in how you respond.

What depression is like for me…Turning the lights off…

Your experience is likely different. We are unique individuals and experience this stuff different…if we experience it at all.

Matches when it’s light out…so here are a few tips.

Remember that Jesus is deeper than the darkest of days.

I’m going to read a really depressing Psalm and then talk about it for a couple minutes…then open it up for a few questions.

Psalm 88 ESV

A Song. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. To the choirmaster: according to Mahalath Leannoth. A Maskil of Heman the Ezrahite. O Lord, God of my salvation, I cry out day and night before you. Let my prayer come before you; incline your ear to my cry! For my soul is full of troubles, and my life draws near to Sheol. I am counted among those who go down to the pit; I am a man who has no strength, like one set loose among the dead, like the slain that lie in the grave, like those whom you remember no more, for they are cut off from your hand. You have put me in the depths of the pit, in the regions dark and deep. Your wrath lies heavy upon me, and you overwhelm me with all your waves. Selah You have caused my companions to shun me; you have made me a horror to them. I am shut in so that I cannot escape; my eye grows dim through sorrow. Every day I call upon you, O Lord; I spread out my hands to you. Do you work wonders for the dead? Do the departed rise up to praise you? Selah Is your steadfast love declared in the grave, or your faithfulness in Abaddon? Are your wonders known in the darkness, or your righteousness in the land of forgetfulness? But I, O Lord, cry to you; in the morning my prayer comes before you. O Lord, why do you cast my soul away? Why do you hide your face from me? Afflicted and close to death from my youth up, I suffer your terrors; I am helpless. Your wrath has swept over me; your dreadful assaults destroy me. They surround me like a flood all day long; they close in on me together. You have caused my beloved and my friend to shun me; my companions have become darkness.

Ever felt that low? I have.

I’m not going to pretend that I know what you’ve felt. I haven’t. I’m not you. Your story is your story. My story is my story. And part of my story is that this Psalm really helped me at a really dark time in my life.

I was feeling really horrible about myself, really dark thoughts, and I read this and thought…man, this guy knows exactly what I’m feeling. And then there was something in one of the words that made me realize this isn’t my Psalm…it belongs to Jesus.

Nobody has been lower than Jesus. Nobody has been in a darker place than him. That means I can’t spiral any further than he has been. I can’t go into any darkness where he isn’t. And because he is underneath of me…b/c he is lower…it means that he is able to push me out of the pit of despair.

Jesus is there with you. That is the biggest thing that I want you to know.

You aren’t alone.

2. Know what emotions are and learn to identify them. Listen to what your body is telling you.

So what do you do if you start feeling all the feels?

What are emotions?

—Dashboard

—you don’t have to let them control. They aren’t the dictator calling the shots. They can have a seat at the table..but they don’t get to make the final decision.

—they are identifying our need

—this often helps a ton…just being able to identify what you are feeling.

3. It’s okay to talk to someone who is safe. Might be tough to identify…are they listening? Are they trying to interject too much of their story? Know when to get help…thoughts of harming yourself, having a plan, things like that…talk to somebody.

4. It’s not necessarily sin but don’t rule it out.

Psalm 32:3 ESV

For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.

5. Know God’s big picture story

My carriage is broken…my carriage is broken.

It gets better. We win, if you are in Jesus. Jesus gets the last word on your life.

If you aren’t in Jesus—it’s possible that this is what is going on, that emptiness might be that you don’t have a relationship with Jesus. God will use those things to draw you to himself.