Desperate Desiring

Last week Jason introduced us this new sermon series based on the 12 steps of recovery. And we learned, or he told us, about a problem. Which is good because the first step to this whole deal is “that we admitted that we were powerless over our problems and that our lives had become unmanageable.” Most importantly, he taught us that our problem, well its us. So you remember this? He said that we’re ungodly. And as rude as it sounds, its true. We all have problems. Maybe you’re like Jay-z and you’ve got 99 problems. But the truth is, and even Jay-z can’t avoid this… all 99 of those problems are you. So just a recap of of how the Apostle Paul described it:

Common English Bible Chapter 7

15 I don’t know what I’m doing, because I don’t do what I want to do. Instead, I do the thing that I hate.

I know. That sounds terrible. But thats why Christianity and recovery aren’t for the weak-hearted. They are for people who are ready to get honest. Like really honest with themselves about whats really going on. And I say all of this because Christianity, recovery, becoming the most authentic versions of who God has created us to be is about searching for, finding, and staying in the SOLUTION to our problem. If we are going to really get into the solution, we have to understand the problem. This isn’t a journey to correct the people around us. It’s not about our spouse, it’s not about our kids, it’s not about our neighbors whose house kind of smells like a skunk has taken up residence… this is a journey about you. We are dealing with me. Say this with me. I AM THE PROBLEM. Come on. Mean it. I AM THE PROBLEM.

See that wasn’t so bad. Now each of you knows what the problem is. And when we know what the problem is, we can seek the solution. So what is the solution? Well all of the rest of the steps! But specifically it starts with the next two, which we will talk about today. So you ready for them?

Step 2: We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Step 3: Turned our will and our life over to the care of God as we understood him.

Sounds easy enough right? I mean here we are. In a church. We’re off to a pretty good start! Believe in God and trust him. Ok cool! Bye!

Not so fast. That’s the kind of message that has probably created more problems than it has solved. Yes believe, yes trust. But we need to look at this a bit deeper, because I think we might find that those words don’t always mean what we think… or want them to mean.

So let’s dive in.

He Can, I’ll Let Him

So steps 2 and 3 are pretty much two sides of the same coin. They can be pretty much boiled down to this. Step one really means “I can’t.” I can’t solve the problem. Steps two and three can be simply understood as “God Can, I’ll let him.” Pretty simple stuff. God is the solution to our problem.

The Apostle Paul certainly followed this type of thinking. You might remember all that talk last week from Paul, pretty much weeping on paper over how he desires to good but he can’t seem to do it. No matter what, he does what he doesn’t want to do. He goes on here a little bit later in Chapter 7.

Common English Bible Chapter 7

21 So I find that, as a rule, when I want to do what is good, evil is right there with me. 22 I gladly agree with the Law on the inside, 23 but I see a different law at work in my body. It wages a war against the law of my mind and takes me prisoner with the law of sin that is in my body. 24 I’m a miserable human being. Who will deliver me from this dead corpse? 25 Thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord!

Thats a lot of law talk. So know that what Paul means when he says “law” is not like some legislation handed down. It simply means “a generally accepted way of living.” So the law of God is God’s ethical way of living. How God wants us to live so that God gets what God wants. So the law of the flesh is really just “How I want to live to ensure that I get what I want when I want it regardless of the consequences” One is great, one is… well not so great.

But check out Paul’s solution. Who can solve the problem? God through Jesus Christ.

So Paul has really nailed down for us and for himself what’s going on. Step 2 says we came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. To be restored to sanity we’ve got to face the fact that our problems have made us insane. And this language is not meant to speak lightly of the mental health crisis in our world. It simply means that we are stuck is a cycle of destruction and non-sense. Paul’s definition was “I don’t do what I want, Instead I do what I hate.”

Albert Einstein put it this way, “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

I have a friend named John who says, “Don’t confuse this with doing the same thing over and over again KNOWING you’ll get the same results. That’s just plain stupidity”

Either way. Paul, Einstein, John, we see the cycle. And the way out of it begins with believing that we are stuck in the cycle and that no human power can pull us out. But God can. God can and will restore us to sanity. IF. big if. IF we do what comes next.

Step 2 is something that happens up here in the mind and the heart. Something clicks, but it doesn’t release us from the mess. It doesn’t say “God restored us to sanity.” I says we came to believe it could happen.

Step 3 where the magic begins to happen. Step 3 requires action. It says we made a decision. Decisions are actions, did you know that? A decision to what? Turn our will (our thoughts) and our lives (our actions) over to the care of God. This is the practical stuff. Like God im stuck in a mess, you can get me out of it. Now i submit my thoughts and actions over to you. Help me out. Please.

I wanna show you kind of what this looked like for one guy in the Bible. So we’re going to jump back like 1500 or so years from Paul. Moses has led the Israelites out of Egypt, through the wilderness and up to the edge of the promised land. He’s preached this ridiculously long and powerful sermon that is recorded in the book of Deuteronomy. The people are like pumped up, lets go, lets go into the land.

And then Moses dies. Like wait what? But just before his death he hands over leadership of Israel to a young man named Joshua. Now it’s Joshua’s job to lead this band of wandering nomads into the promised land, which will prove to be a difficult endeavor. First of all, these people have not been easy to lead. They don’t really like listening to God’s commands or God’s appointed leader. They are going to encounter some hostile people. They are going to come into contact with other ways of life that are contrary to the ways that God has commanded them to live. So let’s check out what God says to Joshua as he’s preparing to deal with this mess.

God comes to Joshua and tells him “its time to go, cross the jordan river, I’m giving you the land.” And then he essentially says “this is the strategy. This is how you’re going to have success.” This is what he says...

Common English Bible Chapter 1

7 “Be very brave and strong as you carefully obey all of the Instruction that Moses my servant commanded you. Don’t deviate even a bit from it, either to the right or left. Then you will have success wherever you go. 8 Never stop speaking about this Instruction scroll. Recite it day and night so you can carefully obey everything written in it. Then you will accomplish your objectives and you will succeed. 9 I’ve commanded you to be brave and strong, haven’t I? Don’t be alarmed or terrified, because the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”

The battle strategy is… Follow the law. Follow my instruction. My ethical ways. The things Moses taught in that really big sermon he gave a little while ago. Keep it on your lips consistently. The Hebrew says “meditate on it or murmur it” unceasingly. Do what I told you to do, live how I told you to live - in every situation - and you will have success.

This message that Joshua receives is the marriage of faith and action. God is saying “when you don’t understand, be brave, do what I’ve told you to do, it will work out. I promise. I’m with you.”

And this is really what step 3 is really all about. It’s about submitting our desires and our behavior over to a higher authority, trusting that they know what’s best for us, even when it doesn’t seem logical.

Therapists and Starbucks

One of the biggest roadblocks to this for so many Christians is that we think that we do this. We remember saying that we believe in Jesus. We remember saying that we “put our whole trust in his grace” as our membership vows ask. And we think that we’ve made this happen.

If you don’t know, the 12 steps are my life. Recovery is my life. I’ve been going to anonymous programs for 19 years. This coming friday, God willing I’ll celebrate 9 years of continuous clean time or sobriety. And yeah, thats really great. And God is to be praised for that. But do some math. That means that for 10 YEARS I didn’t get it. I knew I had a problem. But I could not grasp the solution. That is the worst kind of desperation. To sit on a bar stool, or outside of a liquor store waiting for it to open, just knowing. Knowing what this is. Praying at night “God help me stop doing this” and then waking up and promising “God, I’m only going to drink just enough to feel good enough to quit drinking.”

Awful. 10 years. Knowing. But powerless. Sure I’d put some time together, but I’d always try to solve the problem with some other mess. Work, retail therapy, relationships, etc. I never understood steps 2 and 3. But here’s the funny thing. I thought that I did!!

It never dawned on me. Until one day I was sitting in a therapist’s office. I was sober for maybe 30 days or so. And he asked me what step I was on. And I said that my sponsor (who is like a guide through the steps) had me working on step 2 which I thought was a waste of time because “I’ve always believed in God and I never stopped.” And do you know what this man said to me?

He goes “how’s that been working out for ya?”

Oh the offense. The knife in the heart. How dare you tell me the truth! Now he wasn’t saying believing in God was the problem. Quite the opposite. He was telling me that the way that my belief in God was being practically lived out in my life was not really causing any kind of personal transformation.

He said something to the effect that, if my belief was all in my head and not something that i practically did with my hands, that it was useless. If I didn’t make a change here, in this aspect of my life, then I was just going to continue getting the same thing in return. I was never going to be restored to sanity.

And I think that we see this for Joshua. Look, Joshua believed in God. Joshua had heard the stories and seen the mighty acts of the God of Israel first hand. But to follow into the unknown was going to require more of him than simply believing.

So my story went on, and with a better attitude I did the work of step 2 and then step 3. One friday night I was sitting at a very busy starbucks in tampa with my sponsor who’s name was Jake. And we completed our discussion and he said to me, ok so now we are going to pray. To which I said, ok. And I bowed my head at the table and he was like no man. On our knees. And I looked around. The place was packed. We were sitting at a table like right next to the order pick up counter. People were waiting for their drinks, ordering. It was a nightmare to me. I was like dude you can’t be serious.

But I didn’t feel like arguing so we got out of our chairs and we knelt down and he grabbed my hands and we prayed. Well he prayed, out loud. I died inside. I don’t know what he said. All i was thinking about was all of the people that must be looking at us.

Here’s the beautiful thing about this, you know if I walked into a starbucks today and I saw a white guy and a black guy knelt on the floor holding hands praying I would be totally inspired. But in that moment I just could not think in that way at all. I was way too concerned about myself.

So finally, mercifully he said amen, we stood up and sat back down. And he was like hey how do you feel? And I was like… I feel like I want to punch you. I’m so embarrassed.

He laughed and he calmly asked… “well why did you do it then?” To which I said “because you told me to.” His response was simply “congrats. You figured out step 3.”

Just Say Yes

God’s instructions to Joshua were “listen, just be brave enough to follow my ways.” Essentially, Josh… Do what you are told. Thats really the secret to fulfilling the requirements here.

Recognizing like, dude my thinking keeps perpetuating the problems in my life. So I’ve got to start thinking with with someone else’s brain. Look at Paul’s last little statement here.

Common English Bible Chapter 7

I’m a miserable human being. Who will deliver me from this dead corpse? 25 Thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then I’m a slave to God’s Law in my mind, but I’m a slave to sin’s law in my body.

Essentially he says “I serve God in my mind, even if my body is still prone to wanting to do the wrong thing.”

This is really a decision to allow God to take the wheel. To keep saying yes to the things that are good for us, even when they make us uncomfortable. It’s really a decision to follow Jesus.

Jesus was a man who didn’t say “hey everyone, believe in me and you’ll be alright.” Jesus was a man who said follow me. In fact he said “If any of you wants to be my disciples, let them deny themselves, take up their cross, and follow me.”

This is the way to restoration. The way that we break out of the cycle of our own problems. We need to start allowing someone else to direct our paths. We can’t solve our problems with the same thinking that created them, so we must invite the voice of God into our lives and then take positive action to get out of our own way and follow in the ways of Jesus.

The most important thing about this is that we just can’t do it on our own. We need people, trustworthy people who have our best interest at the heart of their intentions to lead us and guide us as we seek to follow Jesus together. Last week Jason told you that it’s his job to tell you that you’ve got a problem. Well it’s also his, and I guess mine too, job to tell you the solution. And it’s your job to listen, to say yes, and to follow.

This is a practice that will guide you well for the rest of your life. It’s a practice that will get you outside of yourself and into the heart and life of Jesus in this world. It is a practice that will make you an authentic human and vibrant follower of Jesus, if you’ll simply deny yourself and follow him.

So this week your task is to just say yes to something that you’ve been putting off. What advice have you been given that you’ve decided was just too uncomfortable to take? What message have you been hearing on Sunday mornings that you just haven’t been quite willing to put into practice yet? How has the still soft voice of God been speaking to you? I challenge you to say yes to that now.

Imagine your life set free from the patterns of negativity and pain that you have been stuck in. Imagine your chains falling off, all for the price of a 3 letter word. Yes. Yes I believe, yes I will follow.