3 Expectations Christ has for His bride

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Intro

— Thank you’s
— I began writing this sermon last week, and had this idea from this Scripture on Expectations. So I get up this morning and come into the office to do my devotional and my devo was on expectations. And I was just like wow God, like that’s awesome that my devo is on the same topic that I’m preaching about tonight. So I send my devos each day to a few guys in the youth group and they send theirs, and Shawn sends his for today, and his was also on expectations. It was just really cool to see that both of our devos were on this topic.
So what is an expectation? It is a strong belief that someone will or should achieve something.
Oftentimes moms expect their kids to always have a clean room, and to always do the dishes and always take out the trash. Sadly for a lot of moms those are unmet expectations. If I didn’t meet my moms expectations, I could expect to get a whoopin, a spanking, right, that should be my expectation.
This happens in marriage a lot of the time too right.
Not the whoopin of course but the unmet expectations
The husband has certain expectations for the wife and the wife has certain expectations for the husband, and when those expectations go unmet, it causes some issues.
Its even more true when it comes to parenting. It still feels weird to think of myself as a parent. Like what in the world, I’m a dad. I had certain expectations about being a dad. I had certain expectations about pregnancy. I had certain expectations about.... child birth... Let me tell you something. I tried to prepare myself for that day. But even still, it definitely was not exactly what i was expecting. Okay and I’ll leave it at that
But in reality, the whole point of marriage between a man and a woman is to be a picture of Christ and the church. Christ and the church is a beautiful example of what a real, godly marriage should look like. Earthly marriage gives somewhat of an expectation of marriage or uniting with Christ in heaven.
Listen to these verses from the book of Ephesians
Ephesians 5:24–27 KJV 1900
Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
There are many very interesting similarities between Jewish wedding traditions and the church’s relationship to Christ.
The Mishnah Kiddushin (the section of the Talmud dealing with “dedication” or betrothal) specifies that a bride is acquired by a groom in one of three ways; one involves the groom leaving his father’s home and traveling to the bride’s home to “purchase” her for a price. The groom gives a token or a dowry, and its value must be known to the bride. In all cases, the wife can only be acquired with her consent. The marriage contract, or ketubah, is then established, and from that moment on the bride is sanctified, or set apart, exclusively for her bridegroom. It is customary for the groom and bride to drink from a cup of wine over which a betrothal benediction has been said. This prenuptial process can be seen as symbolic of Christ’s work on our behalf. Jesus left the home of His Father (heaven) and traveled to the home of His prospective Bride (earth) to purchase her for a price; that is, His own blood (1 Corinthians 7:23).
Acts 20:28 KJV 1900
Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood.
His Bride has joyously consented to the match. He has given her a priceless token, the indwelling of the Holy Spirit
Ephesians 1:13–14 KJV 1900
In whom ye also trusted, after that ye heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation: in whom also after that ye believed, ye were sealed with that holy Spirit of promise, Which is the earnest of our inheritance until the redemption of the purchased possession, unto the praise of his glory.
With the establishing of the ketubah (the New Covenant), Jesus’ Bride was sanctified for Him (1 Corinthians 6:11). The communion wine is symbolic of the covenant by which Christ obtained His Bride. The Shulkhan Arukh, an exhaustive presentation of the details of Jewish law, elaborates regarding the two stages of marriage: the betrothal (kiddushin, meaning “sanctified”) and the consummation of the marriage (nisuin, translated “elevation”). Kiddushin is not engagement as we understand it. It is a binding agreement in which the woman is legally considered the wife of the man. It was routine in Jesus’ day for kiddushin and nisuin to be separated by as much as a year. During that time the bridegroom would construct the marital home. This, too, can be viewed as a metaphor for spiritual truth. After sealing the covenant with the Church, Jesus ascended to His Father’s home to prepare a dwelling place. Just prior to His death, Jesus told His disciples,
John 14:2–3 KJV 1900
In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.
According to Jewish marriage law, when the time came for nisuin, the groom would return for his bride, accompanied and escorted by friends or family. The exact time of his arrival was not usually known in advance .
Matthew 25:13 KJV 1900
Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.
The groom’s arrival was announced with a shout and trumpet. The Church’s Bridegroom has been separated from His Bride now for nearly 2,000 years, and one day He will come for her and snatch her from the earth to meet Him in the air
1 Thessalonians 4:16–17 KJV 1900
For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.
We don’t know when exactly this will happen; we must be ready and remain faithful (Mark 13:33). Jesus will be accompanied by an angelic escort, preceded by a shout, when He returns for the Church as it said in 1 Thessalonians 4:16 that we just read.
So it is family month, and this week were going on our marriage retreat, and so I want to speak to you tonight on the topic of marriage. Not your earthly marriage to your human husband or wife, but collectively as the church, our marriage to Christ.
Tonight we will look at 3 expectations Christ has for His Bride.
Turn with me to Matthew chapter 6
Matthew 6:2–3 KJV 1900
Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth:
Matthew 6:5–7 KJV 1900
And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly. But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking.
Matthew 6:16–17 KJV 1900
Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face;
So this passage of Scripture comes from the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus’s longest discourse and teaching. We must view Matthew 6 in in two contexts, in the context of the Sermon on the mount, and in the context of the gospel itself. Whereas chapter 5 focused on the fact that a kingdom servant has a changed heart, Matthew 6 talks about having a different perspective about our personal relationship with God. Much like the epistle to the Hebrews and 2 Peter 1, Christ is teaching that those who have righteousness by faith alone now need to add to their faith and work out their faith. These works are a natural fruit of our faith. We don’t work to gain faith, rather because of our faith we naturally do good works. One of his overall themes of this passage is that we should not do these good works for mans approval, rather for God. Christ wants an authentic and genuine relationship with His bride, not just one thats for show.
Now with that in mind we see the first expectation in verses one through four
and I say expectation because He says “when you do this” not “if you do this” so it is Christ’s expectation for His followers to do these things

1. When you Give (v. 2-4)

Matthew 6:1–4 KJV 1900
Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly.
alms is just a fancy word for your offerings and donations.
a. Do it privately
If you notice in each of these instances Christ is contrasting how the Pharisees do things, and how the Disciple should do things. The pharisees are boastful and proud of their accomplishments, trying to gain the approval of men whereas the Disciple is meant to be meek and humble in their giving.
Giving is one of those touchy subjects that Preachers don’t like talking about and congregants don’t like listening to. I saw a post on facebook yesterday in fact that said if money is the root of all evil then why is the church always asking for it? That’s gonna cause some sort of existential crisis for someone
Of course we understand that money is not the root of all evil but 1 Timothy 6:10 tells us that the love of money is the root of all evil. If money itself was evil then we’d all be in trouble, right. So we know we should not seek any sort of glory for our giving, so give privately but also give sacrificially
b. Do it sacrificially
There is a principle within the Bible known as giving of your firstfruits. Firstfruits.
Proverbs 3:9 KJV 1900
Honour the Lord with thy substance, And with the firstfruits of all thine increase:
This is giving the first of your increase. So for example, if you reap a portion of your harvest one day, but the day ends and your not able to reap the rest of your fields, you would still donate those first fruits that you reaped to the Lord, not knowing if a dust storm or a flood or something could come and wipe out the rest of your crops. It is an act of faith and trust that God is going to take care of you, regardless of what happens. So this principle tells us that God is first. He is the first priority. I truly believe that if I get some sort of pay cut or something, I need to always continue to give sacrificially to the Lord. I’m going to sacrifice other things first before I quit giving my offerings to the Lord.
2 Corinthians 9:7 KJV 1900
Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.
1 Corinthians 13:3 KJV 1900
And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.
Giving is an act of worship. We are to give out of a heart of love and cheerfulness, not begrudgingly. One of my favorite parts of my job here is I get to handle benevolence. When someone walks up to the church in the middle of the week and needs something they always ask for a pastor. And trust me, I get to meet some characters okay. And so miss heather will call me and tell me there’s someone here who wants to talk to a pastor, so I go out there and usually when the person sees me they think I’m one of the school kids or something, they’re like you’re, you’re a pastor, (Continue story of being able to hear from people, pray for them, and witness to them).
If I have the wrong attitude, I can view this as an inconvenience instead of an opportunity.
So give out of a heart of love and cheerfulness, not begrudgingly because its an act of worship.
Another resource that I think is often neglected when it comes to giving is of our time and service, which is also an act of worship. Brother Andrew preached on this a few months ago and in my Bible, from that message I wrote “The Greek word for serve in verse 9 is reserved for religious purposes, and is often translated as worship. Service is not only external but also internal. Service is worship and worship is service. That comes from his message on Romans 1:9
Romans 1:9 KJV 1900
For God is my witness, whom I serve with my spirit in the gospel of his Son, that without ceasing I make mention of you always in my prayers;
Time is one of the most abundant resources we have. Because I am the youth pastor i think of it in this way. I am like their under-under shepherd, right. Christ is the chief shepherd, Brother andrew is the under shepherd, and I am the under under shepherd. Generally speaking, I get 2 hours a week to invest and speak into the lives of our students. I get an hour on wednesday nights and an hour on sunday mornings. There are 8,760 hours in year. So out of 8,760 hours a year I get 104 hours to invest in them. So I get 1.18 percent of their time. Compare that to the national average of a teenager spending 6 hours on their phone a day being influenced by social media and the internet and its quite a difference. Here’s why this is a big deal:
Hebrews 13:17 KJV 1900
Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls, as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief: for that is unprofitable for you.
I have to give an account one day of how I shepherd these youth. I need every minute I can get. This is why church must be a priority for the family. And by the way, discipleship should start in the home. It is the parent’s ultimate responsibility to raise their children to love the Lord. Sometimes I think parents rely to heavily on the church to teach their children about the the Lord. Can I just say this. Dads? It is your ultimate responsibility to teach your children the things of God. Moms? If daddy doesn’t want to you’re next in line on the chain of command. And really it should be a joint effort. Striving together as parents to instill a biblical worldview into your child. Its not the churchs job, or the schools job, but you can use those ministries as tools to invest in your kids. Church ought to be a priority for the family.
So you may need to sacrifice time for other things in order to spend time at church on a Sunday and a Wednesday.
c. Be rewarded openly
Rewards from giving is a touchy subject within a touchy subject, because if one is not careful, this could lead to a prosperity gospel type of teaching and that is not what we want to teach here as a church right. But I think there is a biblical principle that we can learn from.
My parents growing up, ever since I could remember always gave their tithes and offerings. I always remember my mom getting out her checkbook during the prayer before the ushers walked down the aisle with the offering plates, racing to try to fill out the check before the prayer ending. I remember my dad always telling me, anytime he gave me a couple dollars for doing chores or when I got my first job, always telling me to pay my tithe and missions, and that if I did I would be well taken care of. When I got to college, the church that I was at would have a missions conference each year, similar to our missions month. But the keynote speaker every year was a man named Don Sisk. Some of you have probably met him or heard him preach. He was a missionary to Japan for decades and now preaches at the occasional meeting, he’s been preaching for over 60 years and is a great man, and any time I ever heard him preach he would always quote Malachi 3:10
Malachi 3:10 KJV 1900
Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, That there may be meat in mine house, And prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, If I will not open you the windows of heaven, And pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.
I must tell you of God’s grace on my life in recent years. October 1st, 2019 is the first time I emailed Brother Andrew. I was 20 years old. Didn’t have a degree, wasn’t married, spent the last of my money on a nice engagement ring so a pretty girl would marry me. We had spent months praying about a ministry to come to and to serve in. And I saw an ad on facebook for the youth pastor position at Gardendale Baptist Tabernacle. I applied, had a few phone interviews with Brother Andrew, Brother Vance, and even Brother Rick. Which when I talked to Brother Andrew it was what I was expecting, it was questions about doctrine, and ministry methods and things like that. When I talked to Brother Vance he was all business man, it was where do you see yourself in five years, how do you handle stress and things like that. Brother Rick just told me where all the good restaurants in the area were at and the places I need to try.
But I remember Abbie was making our budget and running like expense reports and excel sheets and trying to figure out what my salary would need to be in order to be able to live off of one salary for a time. And so we figured out that number prior to all this and prayed that God would meet our needs, and wouldn’t you know it, after I accepted the job, my salary was that exact number we prayed for. Our God is a good and gracious God, and we have been well taken care of.
But, this begs the question, what if God had not given us what we ask for? What if a person is always faithful in their tithe and offerings and missions giving but never sees any financial blessings in their own life?
I believe its like Brother Andrew says, if you’re in this air conditioned room right now with a shirt on your back and shoes on your feet then you are richer than 90% of the world.
I also believe that those who give, God blesses with a content spirit.
Philippians 4:11 KJV 1900
Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.
I can tell you regardless of the situation, we can cling to the promise of Romans 8:28
Romans 8:28 KJV 1900
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
So Christ expects His bride to give, but He also expects His bride to pray
A lack of communication will always lead to an unhealthy marriage right. You must communicate with Christ through prayer, and He wants to communicate with you through His Word

2. When you Pray (v. 5-13)

Matthew 6:5–13 KJV 1900
And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly. But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him. After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.
a. Do it privately
We see again that this is one of those things that is best done in private. Right, the pharisees would rehearse these amazing eloquent prayers in order to gain awe from the listeners, but they didn’t care if the true listener heard them. They had no regard for God’s ear. I’m still taking some online classes, and the loading screen is a quote from the college’s founder and it says “nothing of spiritual significance happens apart from prayer”. We can’t expect our marriages to godly and fulfilling if we don’t pray for our spouses. We can’t expect our children to love the Lord, His Word, and His Church if we don’t pray for them. We can’t expect our lost family members or friends to come to Christ if we don’t pray for them. We can’t expect our city, our state, or our nation to come back to God if we don’t pray even for our neighbors. We must be a people of prayer. A muslim gets down on his knees five times a day to pray to a god that doesn’t exist, when’s the last time you got on your knees once, twice, three times a day to seek the throne of God. We must be a people of prayer.
1 Thessalonians 5:17 KJV 1900
Pray without ceasing.
James 5:16 KJV 1900
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
The greek word for fervent there in that verse is energeyo, where we get our word energy from, it is to pray with energy, its active, working, and operative.
Can we just be honest with ourselves for a second. Prayer is one of those topics we hear so much of that if were not careful, oftentimes we become hardened to it. Just be honest with yourself and ask yourself this question: How’s my prayer life? Is it stagnant? Has it become dull? Do i run out of things to say?
Christ wants to hear from you.
So here’s an acronym I was taught a long time ago on how to pray. A easy start guide to help your prayer life get off the ground and running.
P Praise Him for who He is and what He has done. (Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.
R Repent of sins I have committed and commands I have neglected (And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors)
A Ask for other’s needs and then my needs (Give us this day our daily bread, and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil)
Y Yield my will to God’s will (Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever, amen.)
So we must communicate with our Lord, but He wants to communicate with you as well, and He does that through His word.
I hear all the time people say, man I wish God would just speak to me, I wish He would just audibly tell me what to do. And everytime I hear someone say that I’m just like “He did!!!” He did right here in His word all you have to do is read and listen. We must communicate with our Lord.
So Christ expects His bride to give, Christ expects his bride to pray, and finally Christ expects His bride to fast.
I just lost everybody with that one right. This is a baptist church I’m not supposed to talk about fasting right. Lets read our text

3. When you Fast (v. 16-18)

Matthew 6:16–18 KJV 1900
Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face; That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.
People have their secret sins right, those sins you dont tell anyone about. I confessed to Brother Rick this week while he was here that my secret sin was gluttony, that I eat way too much food, I bought two half gallons of blue bell ice cream last week. Milk chocolate and mint chocolate chip and man i finished both of them in two days. Yeah, Abbie was not happy. Speaking of marriage if they don’t serve blue bell ice cream at the marriage supper of the lamb I’m getting up and walking out. But I told brother rick my secret sin was gluttony
and he said oh yeah me too me too, and I said well brother, I don’t think thats a secret.
Alright, yall don’t tell him I said that okay,
he’s definitely still in better shape than I am and could probably run laps around me, I mean I get winded walking home from work and I live right there
Notice again it says “when” When you fast. It is normal and necessary for a Christian to fast.
a. Do it privately
We see again Christ telling the listener to do it privately. Not for the praise of man, but for a more intimate communion with the Lord.
Scripture does not command Christians to fast. God does not require or demand it of Christians. At the same time, the Bible presents fasting as something that is good, profitable, and beneficial. The book of Acts records believers fasting before they made important decisions (Acts 13:2; 14:23). Fasting and prayer are often linked together (Luke 2:37; 5:33). Too often, the focus of fasting is on the lack of food. Instead, the purpose of fasting should be to take your eyes off the things of this world to focus completely on God. Fasting is a way to demonstrate to God, and to ourselves, that we are serious about our relationship with Him. Fasting helps us gain a new perspective and a renewed reliance upon God.
Although fasting in Scripture is almost always a fasting from food, there are other ways to fast. Anything given up temporarily in order to focus all our attention on God can be considered a fast. Fasting should be limited to a set time, especially when fasting from food. Extended periods of time without eating can be harmful to the body. Fasting is not intended to punish the flesh, but to redirect attention to God. Fasting should not be considered a “dieting method”. The purpose of a biblical fast is not to lose weight, but rather to gain deeper fellowship with God. Anyone can fast, but some may not be able to fast from food due to age of health issues. Everyone can temporarily give up something in order to draw closer to God. By taking our eyes off the things of this world, we can more successfully turn our attention to Christ. Fasting is not a way to get God to do what we want. Fasting changes us, not God. Fasting is not a way to appear more spiritual than others. Fasting is to be done in a spirit of humility and a joyful attitude.
It is spiritually healthy to fast from something that may be taking your eyes off of God. That may be food, it may be a phone, internet, social media, wrong friends, wrong music, anything that takes my eyes off of God can be fasted from.

Conclusion

Christ expects His bride to give
Christ expects his bride to pray (Praise Him, Repent of sin, Ask for needs, Yield to His will)
Christ expects His bride to fast
Now the average husband, when his expectations go unmet, will generally become angry or upset, and will cause real issues in the relationship.
However, Christ is not the average husband. He is the perfect, most gracious, most merciful, most loving husband. Now its true, we may grieve Him at times according to Ephesians 4:30, but He never leaves us, never forsakes us, and never stops loving us. His forgiveness for His bride has no bounds and no limits. He is the perfect husband, so by His grace lets strive to meet His expectations.
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