The Rhythm of Love: Ally and Aubrey Sanderford

PLEASE RISE FOR THE ENTRANCE OF THE BRIDE

YOU MAY BE SEATED

We are gathered here today to join Ally and Aubrey in holy matrimony. A special thanks to all of you that traveled from far and wide to witness the promise these two are about to make to one another. We are here to offer our love and support, and to stand with Ally and Aubrey as they begin this new chapter of their lives. And it is my honor to join you in marking the start of Ally and Aubrey’s marriage.

At this moment, I would like to invite Amy Cochran to sing a special number for us.

Homily

At our church, Ally and Aubrey serve the Lord on our praise team. Ally is a singer, and Aubrey is not only a singer, but also a multi-instrumentalist. Many of our church members, myself included, have been immensely blessed by their music ministry.

I don’t know about you, but I LOVE music. I, too, am an instrumentalist. On top of that, I am an avid music listener, and a Grammy-nominated shower head singer. To me, music is not just about the notes, sound waves, and instruments. Music has revealed to me the beauties of the universe that God has created for us. The seasons move in a 4 count. The pitter-patter of rain beats like a drum. And the birds sing in a beautiful harmony.

The universe gracefully swings to the rhythm of Love.

In a very similar way, life has a musical element it, as well. The author of Ecclesiastes discovered this, and wrote this beautiful passage about the rhythmic nature of life. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 says...

Ecclesiastes 3:1–8 ESV

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.

It is clear that life is FULL of different times and seasons. Today, is a time for beautiful celebration. Today marks the beginning of Ally and Aubrey’s beautiful marriage. I, myself, am a young groom. My wife and I will be coming up on our three year anniversary at the end of June. And let me tell you, it has been some of the best three years of our lives. So for these next couple of moments, I want share with you...

5 Moments to Make Time for in Marriage

Make Time to Laugh

When people ask me, “Rhidge, what is it like being married?” I always respond, “I have never laughed harder in my life.” My wife is, quite honestly, the funniest person I know. The jokes she cracks make me ugly cackle. The Bible tells us in Proverbs 17:22, “A merry heart does good like a medicine.” To the biblical author, laughter has some sort of healing element to it. It’s kind of fascinating when you think about it. Laughing as a form of healing? We normally think of medicines like Tylenol, Advil, and Robitussin as tools of healing for people when they’re sick. But laughter? Laughter, especially in marriage, is healing. Laughter, like Robitussin, can soothe an aching heart. It leaves space for joy and taking things less seriously. Sharing moments of laughter with other couples is such a healing experience as well! And not just laughing when people are around, but even when nobody is looking. The hardest and most joyful laughs you’ll share together will be when no other soul is around. So do not forget to make time to laugh, and laugh, and laugh.

But I would be a very ignorant person if I thought that the only goal in marriage is to be happy. Truly, I think it’s ignorant and, at times, toxic to think that happiness is the primary goal of marriage. When two humans come together and decide to make a lifelong commitment, challenges will arise. And challenges bring on many emotions, especially tears. And this leads to our next moment...

Make Time to Lament (cry, grieve, or be sad)

Brene Brown, an American author and professor, writes extensively about vulnerability. About it, she writes, “Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our greatest measure of courage.” As the husband, I’ve always thought that holding in my greatest fears and worries was a sign of strength. I thought that keeping a strong composure at all times would prove to be a great tool in my marriage. But little did I know that holding in my fears only gave them more power. I felt like a volcano ready to erupt at any given moment. And being a full-time minister didn’t help. But It wasn’t until I allowed myself to cry in the arms of my wife did I realize what true courage looked like. Sharing with her all of my darkest thoughts and secrets literally liberated me from my inner demons. Truly, James was right in James 5:16, saying, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” Whoa, whoa, whoah. Confession as a form of healing? The biblical authors believed that both laughter AND lamenting bring healing to the soul. Being vulnerable with one another will take time, but it will bring healing. So remember, make time to lament.

Make Time to Lean

Marriage is a team effort. I’ve learned that it is not merely two parties meeting each other halfway. It’s two parties dynamically and passionately pursuing one another in love. When one is weak, the other will uplift. When one is need, the other gives. No matter the situation, you two are better together. Even in the beautiful creation story, God says in Genesis 2:18, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” And this is amazing to know. Think about it: God literally designed us to work together. He fashioned us in a way that moves us to help others. To lift each other up. To lean on each other. So make time to lean. Most importantly, don’t just make time to lean on each other, but lean on Jesus, lean hard.

Make Time to Listen

Fore those of you who don’t know, Ally is a Registered Nurse. And my wife, Liezel, is also a nurse. Now, Aubrey. I don’t care how bad of a day you had at work. Your worst day in the office will never—EVER—surmount to the chaotic nature of a hospital floor. Yes, a project at work may have fallen through the cracks. But did you wipe someone’s butt? So when Ally comes home from work—tired, sweaty, and very hungry—please listen. And Ally, the same goes for you! Listen to your mans! James 1:19 says, “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” In music, the best band members are those who are able to listen to each other. This is not a race. This is not a competition. This is a holy union. And unions bid us to listen.

And our last, but most important moment to make time for...

Time to Love

Love, as we all know, is a beautiful thing—a Reality that holds the universe in place. It builds up. It heals. It brings people together. It is the very rhythm of our universe. And love is the very essence of God because “God is love”. Paul, in 1 Corinthians 13, takes love to another level by saying that it is an option that never fails. In other words, when lying and cheating seem to be the easier choices, love bids us to be honest. When storming out of an argument seems to be the mode of escape, love begs us to be quiet and just listen to each other. When the pain of life is so great and there are no words to adequately describe how we feel, love encourages us to look to Jesus. When humanity was at its weakest, and evil seemed to be the victor, God exemplified love…because He knows no failure. Ellen White, in Christ Object Lessons, beautifully articulates this very point by saying, “We are to cooperate with the One who knows no failure.”

Ally and Aubrey, may you ALWAYS make time to love. Through every hill and valley. Through every triumph and adversity. Through thick and thin. Choose Love. Because when you do, you choose God, and, in turn, you’ll choose each other. Let us pray.

Vows

At this moment, the bride and the groom will be repeating their vows to each other.

Aubrey, we will begin with you.

Now, Ally will say her vows to Aubrey.

Exchange of Rings

It is now time for you to exchange rings. Your rings symbolize the eternal commitment that you make to each other, and the never ending circle of your love. May these rings always remind you of the commitment you are making here today.

Aubrey and Ally, please repeat after me. We’ll start with Ally

I, Ally...give you, Aubrey...this ring as a symbol of my love...and commitment to you.

I, Aubrey...give you, Ally...this ring as a symbol of my love...and commitment to you.

Beautiful.

Declaration of Intent

Now,

Do you, Aubrey, take this woman to be your wedded wife?

…I do...

Do you, Ally, take this man to be your wedded husband?

…I do...

Declaration of Marriage and the Kiss

“By the power invested in me as a minister of the gospel of Jesus Christ, I now declare that Aubrey and Ally are husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride!” (MOVE OUT THE WAY)

Everyone, it is my greatest honor...to introduce to you..Mr. and Mrs. Sanderford!

Dismissal

For our dismissal, can we please have the immediate family members of the Bride and Groom stay here for pictures.

For the rest of the guest, feel free to make your way to the barn for cocktail hour!