Family Testimony Part 2

Last week we focused on wives… submitting to their own husbands

SO THAT: and we looked at their testimony and how God focuses on the heart

Husbands do play a role in this, but ultimately you look to God and obey Him without fear

this week we will focus on us husbands, and a Godly husband will make this easier!

As Peter challenges both men and women it is good for the single individuals to consider:

First… remember it is our GOAL to be Christ like in our attitudes, actions, and hearts

Men… look for a woman who exhibits a beautiful heart not just outer beauty, one who is already submitting to the Lord

Ladies… look for a man who has the character you would desire to submit to and exhibits the character we will look at today in our passage

REMEMBER: you are looking for one who exhibits Christ like character, he himself is not and cannot be Christ!

ILLUSTRATE: Chainsaw and how it look, sound, and act but the depth is not there is we do not do it one way… God’s way.

Men Defined:

How do we define… manhood, men, real man, fathers, husbands???

The world gives their opinions on these definitions and is constantly changing and morphing to what is or is not popular, accepted, or portrayed in the media and Hollywood.

Scripture illustrates for us many men and even draws out both their strengths and weakness… Can we define manhood or husbands this way???

Abraham… faith

Joseph… integrity

David… warrior & poet

Daniel… prayerful & wisdom

Paul… bold

Solomon… romance

Elijah… God fearing & willing to cry

Barnabas… compassionate

Noah… steadfast

Peter… passionate

Jesus Christ… all encompassing of these traits and any other Godly trait!!!

God directs Peter to write these words in 1 Peter 3:7 to help us define HUSBANDS… God also directs Paul to write further description in his letter to the Ephesians.

1 Peter 3:7 NASB95

You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.

In The Same Way… Husbands

Husbands Love as Christ

Consider Christ as He loves His church… not even always lovable

Husbands… as heads of our homes we submit to Christ, God holds you and I accountable

Three imperatives are given here by Peter:

1) Live with your wife

2) Know your wife

3) Honor your wife

Following these imperatives we will see the outcome… SO THAT

Live With Your Wife

We are to do more than put up with her or survive this life with her… there is far more expected.

We too often get distracted or even try to SUBSTITUTE what God calls us to by

Focusing on a career or providing physical things as an excuse for our absence

We are to also provide for our own wives:

Physically

Emotionally

Mentally

Spiritually!!!

The two coming together in marriage and becoming ONE FLESH! Genesis 2

Some men would rather fall on a sword to protect… rather than live in this way with their wives!

The next command Peter gives us as husbands is powerful!

Know Your Wife

Men we are to live with our wives … “in an understanding way” or another way is to say according to knowledge!

YES!!! Scripture is actually commanding husbands to UNDERSTAND THEIR WIFE!!!

share the genie story where man wants a bridge to Hawaii and genie ask him to choose something else. Man ask to understand women… so do you want the bridge two lanes or four!

Truly discovering how you can minister to her soul… the hidden person of her heart!

Her intimate desires

Her deepest needs

Discerning her concerns, anxieties, helping her live without fear

Men do this better during courtship… women appreciate it, get married, and the husband stops!

Husbands never stop seeking to know and understand her

Peter states the WHY for us: She is weaker… She is woman

How is the woman weaker???

Scripture does not indicate in any way that it is intellectual inferiority

We do not see in scripture where women are weaker spiritually than men either… often they are very sensitive to the Spirit’s leading

I don’t even believe it is speaking to weaker emotionally…

Often we see the vulnerable side of a woman’s emotion and her expressing them as men and see it as weakness, yet they are often more courageous and stronger in how they are willing to embrace their emotions than men sometimes

I believe this is why Paul exhorts husbands to Love and women to respect… Men often struggle with showing Love or emotion

The weakness I see and believe Peter is speaking of here is physical strength… not stamina (pregnancy and delivery)

Do not use your place as head of the home as a bully, in a forceful way, do not handle her in a masculine way and rough

She is a woman, she is precious!!! Treat her as one weaker, with value and care

Peter addressing men in today's words is saying what kind of pathetic man, being stronger would think of using his strength and harm her!!!

She is not your servant, mother, buddy, punching bag she is a woman (the grand finally of God’s Creation)

IN AN UNDERSTANDING WAY… know your wife, discover her value and esteem her for it!

Don’t be lazy!!!

As you begin to understand her deeper you will have no problem with Peter’s next imperative:

Honor Your Wife

Assign to your wife the status of honor… God created man and woman… husband and wife to rule together (KING QUEEN)

Peter clearly states the equal standing husband and wife have as they share as heirs together in the grace of life!

Honor your wife… as your top priority, giving her a place of honor in your heart, esteeming her in your mind, valuing her with your time!!!

What a powerful marriage when the husband and wife share in the grace of eternal life!

TWO POWERFUL GIFTS OF LOVE:

Understand your wife

Honor your wife

The Outcome: SO THAT

Our marriage men will affect our walk with the Lord and our prayers. Peter here is stating what he addresses in 1 Peter 3:12

1 Peter 3:12 NASB95

“For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous, And His ears attend to their prayer, But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

When you and I as husbands fail to follow God’s commands here we are living and doing evil!

God calls man and wife to oneness… try praying when you are fighting with your wife

Your marriage is a gauge of your spiritual condition in your home

Prayer is powerful, imagine the impact and power of a man and woman that God has brought to gether as ONE coming together on their knees before God!!! Wow!

No wonder Satan attacks the home and marriage with such a vengeance

Questions to Ask:

1. Are we partners or competitors?

2. Are we helping each other become more spiritual?

3. Are we depending on the externals or the eternals? The artificial or the real?

4. Do we understand each other better?

5. Are we sensitive to each other’s feelings and ideas, or taking each other for granted?

6. Are we seeing God answer our prayers?

Lastly: I want to encourage each couple listening to have a mentor, a Godly couple you can talk to, pray with, go to… the church is to be a community of believers there for one another to help point each other to Christ and His Word.

PRAY FOR OUR MARRIAGES...