A Virtuous Mother

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! Everyone has a mother. All women may not be mothers, but every person - men and women - has a mother. So, Mother’s Day is one of the most special days of the year.

We love our mothers here at Northgate. We love our mothers because they have taught us so much in life. Someone wrote the following about his mother and what he had learned from her.

My mother taught me IRONY - "Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE WHAT I HAVE - "It's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick."

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE - "If you're going to kill each other off, do it outside - I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me RELIGION - "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL: "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you to the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC: "Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT - "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me OSMOSIS - "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me LOVE - "You know that whatever happens, I'll always stand behind you."

We all owe so much to our mothers!

The Old Testament book of Proverbs is classified as one of the Books of Wisdom in the Bible. It is filled with 31 chapters of practical and pointed statements of advice, instructions, directions and examples for godly living.

Those of you who know the final chapter, Proverbs 31, know that most of the final chapter of Proverbs is about the godly, virtuous woman of which God approves. In fact, the woman referenced in this 31st chapter of Proverbs has often been called, “A Proverbs 31 Woman.”

If there is a true Wonder Woman, she is found here in Proverbs 31!

But for our purposes this morning, I also want you to realize that this virtuous woman, this Proverbs 31 Woman is also a mother. So, my message on this Mother’s Day Sunday is simply, “A Virtuous Mother.”

Proverbs 31:10–31 (NKJV) 10 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. 11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. 12 She does him good and not evil All the days of her life. 13 She seeks wool and flax, And willingly works with her hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar. 15 She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants. 16 She considers a field and buys it; From her profits she plants a vineyard. 17 She girds herself with strength, And strengthens her arms. 18 She perceives that her merchandise is good, And her lamp does not go out by night. 19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hand holds the spindle. 20 She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, For all her household is clothed with scarlet. 22 She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies sashes for the merchants. 25 Strength and honor are her clothing; She shall rejoice in time to come. 26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness. 27 She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all.” 30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. 31 Give her of the fruit of her hands, And let her own works praise her in the gates.

Proverbs 31 asks a very important question in verse 10. I call it the enquiry of or about a virtuous mother.

I. The Enquiry of a Virtuous Mother, Proverbs 31:10

Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.

This enquiry includes first a request.

A. The Request for Such a Mother, Who can find a virtuous wife?

The question does not imply such a virtuous or capable woman does not exist. No, it affirms that such a woman does indeed exist and that this is the kind of woman a man should seek. Or that this is the kind of woman or mother every woman should seek to become.

But she is rare. Not every woman qualifies as a Proverbs 31 Woman.

B. The Rarity of Such a Mother, Who can find a virtuous wife?

Finally, she is described as rich or valuable. She is not only virtuous but valuable.

C. The Richness of Such a Mother, For her worth is far above rubies.

How valuable is a ruby or a precious diamond? Such precious stones were extremely rare in that time. And it was her rarity that leads to her richness.

Just how much is such a virtuous mother worth?

In 2005 Newsweek actually had the courage to say “Mother matters” and pointed out that according to Salary.com, “Stay-at-home moms, if compensated for all the hours they work, would net $131,471 a year” (Newsweek Staff, “Survey: Mother Matters”). The article went on to say,

• 71 percent of wives say their husbands get on their nerves more than do their children.

• 50 percent of women say their mom is their best friend.

• 94 percent of dads say moms are as sexy as ever![1]

T/S—Beginning with verse 11 we see the example of a virtuous mother.

II. The Example of a Virtuous Mother, Proverbs 31:11-20

I think the beginning of verse 11 is one of the most important descriptions of this virtuous mother. The heart of her husband safely trusts her. Her husband trusts her.

So, she is described as dependable. Dependable to her husband and obviously to her children.

A. Dependable, Proverbs 31:11-12

She is not only dependable, but diligent. Look at verses 13-15.

B. Diligent, Proverbs 31:13-15

13 She seeks wool and flax, And willingly works with her hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar. 15 She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants.

In verse 13 she takes care of the family’s clothing. In verse 14 she takes care of the family’s food, sailing out and returning daily “like the merchant ships,” bringing what they need. And in verse 15 she takes care of the family’s schedule, rising before sunrise if necessary to provide food for her whole household. [2]

A teacher asked her class what word started with an “M” and was used to pick things up. She was looking for magnet, most of the class said, “Mother”! [3]

Letter C tells us this Virtuous Mother is also discernable. She not only works hard with her hands, but she also uses her head!

C. Discerning, Proverbs 31:16-20

16 She considers a field and buys it; From her profits she plants a vineyard………………………

She is business savvy for her family. She is the family CEO and entrepreneur.

18 …………., And her lamp does not go out by night. She works long hours into the night!

T/S--Finally, we try to summarize the entirety of such a Virtuous Mother.

III. The Entirety of a Virtuous Mother, Proverbs 31:25-31

A. Her Happiness, Proverbs 31:25-27

Verse 25 speaks of her happiness. 25 She shall rejoice in time to come.

Some mothers anguish over problem kids. I tell them, you’re not done yet!

B. Her Home, Proverbs 31:28-29

Verses 27-29 speaks of her home. 27 She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all.”

One of the all-time greats as a mother was Susannah Wesley, mother of Charles and John. Mother to seventeen children, she prayed one hour each day just for them, and she spent one hour each week discussing spiritual matters with each one individually. Her children, no doubt, called her blessed. Why? Here are a few of the rules she used in raising her children. At the time, they may have seemed harsh. Later, her children saw the wisdom of them and blessed her for loving them in such clear and tangible ways.

1. Eating between meals not allowed.

2. All children they are to be in bed by 8 p.m.

3. They are required to take medicine without complaining.

4. Subdue self-will in a child, and those working together with God to save the child’s soul.

5. Teach a child to pray as soon as he can speak.

6. Require all to be still during Family Worship.

7. Give them nothing that they cry for, and only that when asked for politely.

8. Prevent lying; punish no fault which is first confessed and repented of.

9. Never allow a sinful act to go unpunished.

10. Never punish a child twice for a single offense.

11. Comment and reward good behavior.

12. Any attempt to please, even if poorly performed, should be commended.

13. Preserve property rights, even in smallest matters.

14. Strictly observe all promises.

15. Require no daughter to work before she can read well.

16. Teach children to fear the rod.

(“16 House Rules”)[4]

C. Her Hope, Proverbs 31:30-31 30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. 31 Give her of the fruit of her hands, And let her own works praise her in the gates.

Charm and beauty are not bad; they simply are not what makes a great woman.

Physical appearance is fleeting; it does not endure. To trust in and focus on these temporary advantages is foolish and self-deceiving. The virtuous woman knows where to place her hope. She knows what lasts, she knows what is eternal. These are the things she values. As one who belongs to Jesus, she seeks the things above. She also sets her mind on things above because her “life is hidden with Christ in God” (Col 3:1–3).

As a result, she receives Godly praise (31:30–31)

What matters is that this lady knows the Lord, loves the Lord, and fears the Lord. Her passion in life is to please him, know him, obey him, and honor him. Such a woman will receive praise. At the end of life, looking back over the many years of service for God and service to others, the Virtuous Mother will have no regrets. [5]

[1] Jonathan Akin, Exalting Jesus in Proverbs, ed. David Platt, Daniel L. Akin, and Tony Merida, Christ-Centered Exposition Commentary (Nashville, TN: Holman Reference, 2017), Pr 31:10–31. [2] Jonathan Akin, Exalting Jesus in Proverbs, ed. David Platt, Daniel L. Akin, and Tony Merida, Christ-Centered Exposition Commentary (Nashville, TN: Holman Reference, 2017), Pr 31:13–15. [3] Alan Carr, “God’s Description of a Godly Mother (Pro. 31:10–31),”in The Sermon Notebook: Old Testament(Lenoir, NC: Alan Carr, 2015), 1699. [4] Jonathan Akin, Exalting Jesus in Proverbs, ed. David Platt, Daniel L. Akin, and Tony Merida, Christ-Centered Exposition Commentary (Nashville, TN: Holman Reference, 2017), Pr 31:28. [5] Jonathan Akin, Exalting Jesus in Proverbs, ed. David Platt, Daniel L. Akin, and Tony Merida, Christ-Centered Exposition Commentary (Nashville, TN: Holman Reference, 2017), Pr 31:30–31.

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