Arrows | Bullseye: Loving Across the Generations

I think most parents wish these dreams over their children. Your parents for you, and you for your children. And you for your grandchildren and still others of you for your great-grandchildren. Arrows represent every one of us in some way shape or form.

As arrows become released... as each one of us have been released… our intention should be such that we soar across the generations, and build upon the previous ones before us: our parents, our grandparents, our aunts and uncles, tias and tios… so that we may build our homes and prepare the way for our children and grandchildren ahead of us.

As an arrow yourself... as one who may be in the process now of releasing arrows... or as one who might be hoping one day to release arrows... how might you both soar and release your arrows to love across the generations and advance the kingdom of God...into new communities… into new cultures... and even into future generations ahead of you?!

For an arrow goes where the warrior cannot go… and together our hope is that our children will go places and accomplish things that we will not... and the healthiest, strongest ones soar to provide, defend, advance, protect, and win victory, all aimed at loving across the generations and influencing future ones for the sake of Jesus and his kingdom.

That’s the bullseye. Someone did it for you, and we must now do this for others.

I once heard someone say, “Christianity is always one generation away from extinction.” Our message must continue onward as we seek to love across the generations. That’s our bullseye!

In 1926, a group of families gathered together to form Christ Journey Church in Coral Gables with that bullseye as their vision. They shared this message during eras of Depression, WW2, Vietnam, the sexual revolution, the Cold War, the cocaine epidemic here in Miami, 9/11, global terrorism, and to this very day now in which we find ourselves, the bullseye has not changed: We are about loving across the generations to help our children, our families, our friends, and our city find and follow Jesus Christ!

At Christ Journey, we are a family, together.

Since moving to Miami a few years ago, one of the many characteristics of Latin culture that I respect and appreciate so much - in addition to the food, the passion, and the art - is the cross-generational involvement of the family. How wonderful to witness abuelas and abuelos, tias and tios, and primos all coming together under the banner of their family identity… with all of the ups and downs and joys and sorrows that come with that, as well.

Some of you know my in-laws, the Tschirhart clan, from within our church community. Now fourth generation Miami themselves, my in-laws embody so many of those rich characteristics that we value from the Latin culture.

As an Irishman myself, I am still learning so much about this wonderful place, and I feel so grateful for the acceptance and love that my family feels from you at our church. It feels like home, as our family tree continues to expand. From 3 daughters, my mother and father-in-law now boast 12 grandchildren.

But that’s not all. On my father-in-law’s side of the tree, every ten years his extended family gathers together for the Tschirhart family reunion just outside San Antonio.

(open by hand the panorama picture)

In 2016, over a thousand of us gathered together, and those were only the ones who could be there in person. Truly, a momentous occasion.

(pause)

But what happens when the family tree becomes fractured, even split apart, or uprooted altogether due to any number of issues that may include hardships contributing to the 42%?

Like for me. I am one of more than 31 million children - 42% - in our country who grew up in a fatherless home.

42%. As a church, let us never forget that number.

In Miami Dade county alone, our home, as of last month, March 2018, according to the American Community Survey, an estimated 353,000 households, comprising nearly one million people live in single parent led households.

How long, Lord?

As a teenager, I can vividly remember one profound moment in particular when the gravity of fatherlessness sobered me to the extent of its effects on a child.

One evening when I was 17, while driving home, a radio commercial announcer began listing off statistics like these:

● 50% more likely to develop health problems

● 300% more likely to need psychological help

● Twice as likely to commit suicide

● And twice as likely to drop out of school

I’ve updated these facts from when I first heard them on the radio almost 20 years ago.

In the car that evening as I listened to the announcer rattle stats like those, I remember wondering: what could possibly be the catalyst for such destructive and debilitative behavior???

I find them just as arresting of my heart now as I did back then.

Toward the end of the radio commercial, the announcer said, “These children grew up in a fatherless home.”

I’m from a fatherless home, I thought. “But How did I not go down that road?"

I began to weep for these children just like me, as I gave thanks to God for graciously sparing my brother and me from becoming one of those overwhelming and near certain statistics.

That moment will forever stay with me.

I resolved to myself that “I will not become a statistic. Instead, I will help those who feel hopeless."

But that question: “How did I not go down that road?” sat at the forefront of my mind for months.

How did my brother and I not become one of those near certain statistics? How did that happen? Now, we certainly dealt with our hardships, and we'll always carry with us some amount of redeemed pain, but after giving this question much consideration, some compelling factors became apparent that influenced my brother and me from going down paths of destruction and debilitation, namely one factor in particular:

The love we felt across the generations.

Full transparency, my father’s divorce felt like an amputation, like a part of my body was cut away. Perhaps you’ve experienced a similar kind of void in your life?

Very few of us, if any of us, get to adulthood without some kind of wounding. Yet, the good news of what we believe about Jesus says that God can restore and even fill the deepest voids of our lives.

And for my brother and me, God did exactly that through the applied love of father-figures from across the generations.

After my parents divorced, unbeknownst to my brother and me, my mother leaned into her instinctive guidance that I call the Holy Spirit to facilitate opportunities for her sons to feel the love across the generations from other men who could help fill the gap of our father’s absence.

She rallied other men like my grandpas and my great grandpa, Ashford Broadwater, who some of you may remember me telling you about during a message a few months back, a man who loved Jesus, his family, his garden, and his rhubarb pie.

My mom also rallied my uncles - men from our extended family tree - along with other men like my Pastors, Gerald Morgan and George Lynch… and other church men like Floyd Milhoan, Harvey Callahan, Dan Decker - men from our church, the village of the Holy Spirit - along with my Boy Scout Senior Scoutmaster, Jeff Evans, from our extended circles who gave a strong, positive influence on my life.

I wanted to say each of these men by name because they earned a place in my heart.

Like antibodies, God used these men from across generations to begin healing my father wounds and restoring my heart and soul back to health.

Some of these men like my Uncle Phil and Uncle Richard, George, Dan, and Jeff were my father’s age, and truly, demonstrated themselves as father figures for my brother and me. Others of these men like Floyd Milhoan who served in WW1, my grandpas who served in the Navy…

(show pic) Handsome gents! My moms father lied about his age so that he could enter into the Navy at 17 and fight in WW2, while my other grandfather served during Vietnam, earning the rank of Master Chief aboard a Destroyer.

...and my great-grandparents who told us stories about how their grandparents had fought in the Civil War. These men were each 60, 70, and 80 years older than my brother and me.

And my brother and I needed every single one of these men. The younger and the older.

They each served a profound role in our healing, adolescent growth, and spiritual formation.

These men rooted our identities into a deeper family and community history, which helped my brother and me keep a wider perspective beyond just ourselves and our own grief.

When we think about these men, my brother and I both agree that they saved our lives. No exaggeration, these men saved our lives.

I believe God used each one of these men to redeem our despair into healing comfort so that my brother and I, in turn, may do the same for others.

That’s the bullseye.

That is love in action. That is love across the generations. That is love through time. That is the tangible hands and feet of Jesus walking and healing through time.

How you love right now across the generations compounds across time… like compound interest. Your love across the generations yields a long term, eternal return.

Wherever you find your life amidst the generations, I want you to know that your presence, your love, and your faith still matters right now both in your family and within our church, whether you are 12 or 112 years old.

In fact, the Apostle Paul wrote about just this idea in his second letter to a young Pastor named Timothy.

From what we can gather from context clues in his letter, circumstances surrounding Timothy at the time had caused him to doubt his calling as a Pastor and probably his faith, altogether. So much that Paul began his letter straightforwardly addressing this issue by reminding Timothy of his identity in Christ through how others across the generations rooted his faith into Christ’s love.

Listen to how masterfully Paul interweaves this concept through the opening lines of his letter:

Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, in keeping with the promise of life that is in Christ Jesus, To Timothy, my dear son:

Hear the familial language that Paul used. Paul points forward.

Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord. I thank God, whom I serve, as my ancestors did,

Paul points backward to his ancestors. Again, keeping with familial, generational language.

with a clear conscience, as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. Recalling your tears, I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy. 2 Timothy 1:1-4

Among all his companions, Timothy held the dearest place in Paul’s heart. Paul first met Timothy on his second missionary journey. From what we can gather from other letters by Paul, Timothy declared his faith in Christ after Paul's first visit with him, because by Paul's second visit with Timothy, He was an established follower of Jesus with a strong reputation in his hometown community. In both of Paul’s letters to him, He refers to Timothy as a son in the faith, and writes about finding great encouragement from Timothy and his family’s faith, saying in the very next line:

I am reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.

Here, Paul attributes Timothy’s faith formation to his mother, Eunice, and grandmother, Lois. We don’t know much about these women, but their names alone say all: in the Greek, Eunice means 'joyous victory’ and Lois means ‘more desirable.’ From their names alone, you can feel the strength of these women, who instilled within Timothy the joyous victory of Christ, which is certainly more desirable than gold.

Devoutly Jewish, Lois and Eunice raised Timothy in a home that honored God and obeyed the law, for In chapter 3 of this same letter, Paul wrote:

You have been taught the holy Scriptures from childhood, and they have given you the wisdom to receive the salvation that comes by trusting in Christ Jesus.

2 Timothy 3:15

The faithfulness of Lois and Eunice created the foundation for Timothy to receive Jesus as his true King, become a co-minister with Paul, and eventually rise into leadership over the church in Ephesus.

Lois and Eunice released their arrow! They created the seedbed for Timothy to grow.

That's the bullseye.

While only the Holy Spirit can awaken hearts and open eyes to the salvation and glory of Jesus, for those of us who know Christ, we have been given a critical role to love across the generations and guide our arrows as close to the bullseye as humanly possible. Lois and Eunice for Timothy, and you and me for our arrows.

But before Timothy became one of the first leaders of the early church, as a young man, he battled against various illnesses and anxieties. We don’t know why, but we do know that Timothy eventually overcame these issues through the power of Christ at work within him the rootedness of his family’s and his father figure’s love, as Paul says:

"I am reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also."

For this reason, I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands.

An act which symbolizes the passing down and commissioning of one to another.

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:6-7

For this reason, I remind you, Paul says. For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline through which the family’s love across the generations may form and influence the faith filled lives of young men and women to flourish into adulthood.

That’s the bullseye! What a powerful calling for the family! God created the family for this reason!

As a young man who grew up in a fatherless home, I did not think much about how God considers the family. I knew God personally, but I could not yet comprehend God as being one so for the family. That just seemed like a foreign concept to me until I began to really the study the Old Testament, beginning when God gave Adam and Eve the charge to multiply and govern creation in Genesis chapter 1… when God first made contact with Abraham and promised generational blessing in Genesis chapter 12, which God ultimately fulfilled through his incarnate Son, Jesus Christ, further revealing himself to us as our Heavenly Daddy, as Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians chapter 1.

Throughout all of the ups and downs and joys and sorrows, God has always made good on his promise and showed himself as a faithful, promise-keeping Father, loving us across the generations, even going to death for us.

God has and will always intend for the family structure to serve as the rich soil - as the firm foundation - as the protective quiver - for the faith, character, integrity, calling, and vocation of our children to bloom into adulthood and be released into the world on salvation mission for God’s kingdom here and now!

That’s the bullseye!

For Paul, mentioning Eunice and Lois meant way more than just a mere passing mention for Timothy’s sake. For Paul wanted Timothy and every future reader of this letter to know that our parents, grandparents, extended families, friendships, and mentors serve an absolutely mission critical role within the kingdom of God as the bearers and cultivators of faith.

The responsibility of faith cultivation belongs first and foremost with the parents, extended family, and other family-type figures in the life of a child.

And though the church is the gathered and sent body of Christ in the world and a village for families to find Christ-centered community, the onus and responsibility for creating a safe space... cultivating a faithful, open environment for young minds and hearts... telling the story of Jesus... and leading others into a relationship with Him... each belong to the parents, extended family, and family-type figures of our children.

Thus why the Orange philosophy matters to us. When the light of the church represented by the color yellow engages the love of the family represented by the color red, children and families then experience the wonderful dynamic of community, health, and faith represented by the color Orange!

This way of doing family together abolishes all isolation, fear, and anxiety.

Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. We love each other because he loved us first. 1 John 4:18-19

To love across the generations means:

● anyone of the 353,000 households in our county can experience our church, our village, as the safest, most loving community in the county.

● children find mother-figures and father-figures and grandparent figures to help them piece back the void made by an absent parent.

● those living with fear can find freedom

● those who feel isolated can find real and true friendships.

● that we create a seedbed for Jesus to grow redeemed and restored family trees that can provide nurturing shade and satisfaction for generations.

That’s the bullseye!

At Christ Journey, we are a family, together.This is what the church does. This is the bullseye. And if this is your first time here, then welcome to the family table. Some of us have been at it for years, and you are welcome here.

We’re here for each other.

Like the doctor who leads teenagers into a growing relationship with Jesus.

Like the mom who leads our preschool large group.

Like the grandmother who holds our babies.

Like the couple who disciples young adults in their home.

Like the high school teenager who sings silly songs at FamJamz.

Like the real estate broker who reads the Bible story to the special needs child in Special Discoveries.

We’re here for each other. We need each other. Sometimes we need a shoulder. Sometimes we need to be the one who gives the shoulder. We need some of you to rise up as surrogate grandparents to kids in our preschool and elementary school environments. Some of you need to follow that prompting in your heart to mentor other middle and high school students. And still others of you need to come with me the 5pm and help steer the challenging phase of young adulthood.

Just imagine what our city might look like with churches who open their hearts to children and their families, where men serve as faithful guardians, where grandparents and great grandparents feel purposeful and invigorated in their generational calling, and where any single mom feels the safety and security to ask another man for help in raising her two young boys.

That’s the bullseye. That’s our church.

If you’ve ever felt disconnected, then let’s change that today. Whether your single, divorced, married, ‘it’s complicated,’ whatever, we are a family, together.