Being the Spiritual Leader
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As we come to Father’s Day tomorrow, God laid on my heart to talk about something that we as Fathers should not take lightly, but it should be one of the greatest things in our life.
As husbands we should not take this lightly either, because I believe it is something that God will examine us for when we get to Heaven.
I am talking about being the Spiritual Leader of our family, again I believe this is something we need to really take seriously.
Scripture makes it clear that we as the Husband, the father, the man are to be the head of the household, the spiritual leaders of the family, according to God’s design for the family.
We see this in Ephesians 5:22-30
22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, 23 because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives are to submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. 27 He did this to present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless. 28 In the same way, husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hates his own flesh but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, 30 since we are members of his body.
Now many people want to argue that we are all equal, that the woman, the wife, the mother is just as capable as the man, to do anything, and even the Bible affirms the equality of men and women.
28 There is no Jew or Greek, slave or free, male and female; since you are all one in Christ Jesus.
Scripture also tells us plainly in our text in Ephesians that God has assigned the responsibility of spiritual leadership in the home to the husband.
22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, 23 because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body.
There is controversy in society today about all of this. Some men wonder, what am I supposed to do - act like a preacher?
Some women ask, why is the man supposed to be the spiritual leader? Why can’t we both do it?
In the end, it all comes down to a very simple and fundamental truth: families need leaders. The buck has to stop somewhere if the household is to function smoothly and efficiently.
It is important to remember here that a difference in roles doesn’t mean unequal. God doesn’t consider wives inferior, inadequate, less important, or less responsible than husbands.
Besides, only an unwise man would reject his wife’s opinions and assistance. After all, the Lord has created her to be his best earthly resource.
When a husband and wife have a healthy relationship, they make decisions together as equals, looking to Christ as the ultimate Head of their home.
They compare their individual aptitudes and assume tasks based on their individual strengths.
In some areas of service they share tasks. But they also recognize that, in the final analysis, the husband carries the greater responsibility for leadership.
If we look to Jesus Christ as our model, we will see that we are supposed to follow the path of a servant-leader.
Jesus put it this way: Matthew 20:26-28
26 It must not be like that among you. On the contrary, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, 27 and whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave; 28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
A spiritual servant-leader, then, imitates Christ. He’s tuned in to his family’s needs and concerned for its spiritual welfare.
He looks for ways to help his family grow in their relationship with God. He provides physical support, grace, and encouragement.
He is ready to protect, help, and defend. In hard times and good times, in season and out of season, he’s ready to lay down his life for his loved ones.
Here are five principles relating to what it means to be the spiritual leader:
Godly leadership is servant leadership. Mark 10:44
44 and whoever wants to be first among you will be a slave to all.
The spiritual leader is to be a role model for everyone else. If he wants the family to speak kindly and respectfully, he must model that type of speech.
If a husband wants his wife to honor him, he must first honor her.
If you want your children to have a good work ethic, you must first demonstrate what that looks like to them.
Spiritual leadership - headship is not a dictatorship. The head of a household seeks wisdom, prays through issues, and then gently instructs the rest of the family in the direction it should go.
If the spiritual leader - the head of the house is not functioning as a healthy head, the entire family will suffer.
2. A spiritual leader takes responsibility.
When God handed out roles for the family, He placed the heaviest burden on the men.
Headship may sound like superiority until we actually read God’s expectations.
The head of a household is responsible before God for the spiritual and emotional well-being of the family.
God judged Eli for not restraining his wicked sons. Eli knew about their evil actions but did nothing about it, so God held Eli responsible as the head of the household.
3. The spiritual leader must have a strong connection with his Heavenly Father, finding his happiness in Christ first, realizing that he can lead effectively only if he maintains an intimate relationship with the Lord.
4. The Spiritual leader must be proactive, spotting potential challenges to the welfare of his wife and children and coming up with workable solutions to problems.
5. The spiritual leader must be characterized by integrity, seeking the be the safest, wisest and most respected man his family has ever known.
God designed the family, and He knows best how it functions.
When we apply His standards of love, submission, responsibility, and servant leadership, the family thrives.
33 To sum up, each one of you is to love his wife as himself, and the wife is to respect her husband.
When a husband steps up and assumes the mantle of responsibility God has placed on him, the rest of the family finds it much easier to fulfill their own roles so that the family is a testament to God’s design.