Dad's, Direction and Discipline

Introduction

Video: In His Shoes (Father’s Day)

Happy Father’s Day to all of you Fathers and grandfathers and we also celebrate those of you who have in some way played the role of a Father in the life of young person when their biological father was not present or involved in their life.

Research has consistantly shown that children with involved, loving fathers are significantly more likely to do well in school, have healthy self-esteem, exhibit empathy and pro-social behavior, and avoid high-risk behaviors including drug use, missing school, and criminal activity. Here in Wisconsin, almost 1 in 4 children live in single parent households, and we fare better than many other states and even better than we did a few years back because more is becoming known about how important the role of a loving, involved father is in the healthy development of both boys and girls.

Of course, as believers, this should not surprises us. We know that God’s design for marriage and family calls every father to be an integral part of their children’s lives, particularly when it comes to leading them in the ways of our heavenly Father.

Ephesians 6:4 (ESV)

4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

And this instruction is one complete thought. It is found in a list of how different relationships in the family system should work and when it comes to the relationship of Father to children there is just this one don’t and this one do.

Don’t provoke your kids to anger

Do bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

For these two instructions to hang out here all by themselves must mean that “exasperating” your children or “provoking your children to anger” was a common misstep for Fathers in this day. Presumably because they were placing expectations on their children that were either demanding and/or confusing to them. But the answer was not to be more clear with YOUR demands, but to instead be bringing them up to know the instruction of the Lord.

This is the number one responsibility of a dad, everything else rests on this one part…to teach our children about God through what we say and how we live.

“Father’s who walk with God light the way”

So much as we did for Mother’s Day, I would like to have all the Father’s, Grandfather’s or Male role models in any way to stand. And I am not asking for just the “perfect” fathers to stand, because then we would have no one standing.

We are desiring to honor the role of Father as God has designed it, not necessarily as we have executed it or experienced it. To some degree this recognition is about fostering good fathering not just rewarding it.

So I have asked the Overseers to come around to each of you to give you a word of encouragement and a little token to remember this recognition. It is a little flashlight keychain with that reminder written on it: “Father’s who walk with God light the way”

After an Overseer has gotten over to you, please go ahead and take a seat so we can see who is left and so that we don’t miss anyone. Then I want to pray for you Dad’s, Granddad’s and stand in Dad’s...

Pray...

Tension

This morning, we are going to be continuing in our Ekklesia series and by God’s providence we are talking about how the Apostle Paul feels toward the Church that he planted in Corinth. What is so cool, is that he says that he feels like a Father to them. Particularly in his role to “walk with God and light that way”. He says in

Paul said:

1 Corinthians 4:14(ESV)

14 I do not write these things to make you ashamed, but to admonish you as my beloved children.

When was the last time you “admonished” your children? Yeah I don’t use that word ether but to admonish is to instruct or advise, often including a warning which this will eventually become, but before that he continues to endure himself to the Church in Corinth who he loves like a good Father would love his children...

1 Corinthians 4:15–16 (ESV)15 For though you have countless guides in Christ, you do not have many fathers. For I became your father in Christ Jesus through the gospel. 16 I urge you, then, be imitators of me.

This is the role of a Father. To so walk with God. To light the way. To give our children an example to follow. And that example is not for our children to become just like us, but for them to become like Christ. Later in the letter he says...

1 Corinthians 11:1 (ESV) 1 Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ.

And Dads, if you are like me then there are a lot of things that you hope your children imitate you in because, lets face it we know the right way to do things…just ask us and we will tell you…Right!?

The right way to throw a football.

The right way to bait your hook.

The right way to organize your tool box.

The right way to tell a guy, “No I am sorry, I can’t date till I am 50”…

We know the “right way” to do all of these things… but what about the most important way to be right? To be right with God through Jesus Christ.

Could we, would we ever dare to tell our Children “Be imitators of me in following Christ”? We should be. This area should not be a “Do as I say and not as I do” kind of thing. Fathers are to lovingly correct their children towards the righteous lives they are modeling for them.

And it was because of this deep level of respect and relationship that Paul was able to use such strong language wit h his “beloved children”. We will see that he doesn’t seem to hold much back in his corrections of their wrong behavior, but it is because like a good father he sees the bigger picture and he knows what is at stake.

Remember there are only two references of Jesus using the word “Ekklesia” mentioned in the Scriptures. Last week we looked at the first one where He said, “I will build my Church and the gates of Hell will not prevail against it.” Today we are going to look at the only other time he used the word Ekklesia, and it is found in Matthew 18 where Jesus talks about how we should admonish and even discipline in the Church.

Matthew 18:15–17 (ESV)

15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.

That is step one and hopefully that takes care of most every issue, but if not, Jesus gives us another step...

16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses.

You see if this truly is a sin issue, and not just a personality clash, misunderstanding or a case when someone just “hurt your feelings” but they did nothing wrong then it would never make it past this step. Bringing in others is not about “ganging up” on them. It is about helping you to evaluate whether you were truly sinned against or just had your feelings hurt.

If others can see the same damaging sin in the situation then they too will want the issue to be dealt with, because they know the damage that this will cause for the individual who committed the sin, the Church as a whole and ultimately the honor of Christ.

And again the hope is that this next step would be more than enough to bring repentance, it certainly should be, but if not, then Jesus says that there is one final drastic measure that the Church must take again for the health of the individual and the health of the Church.

17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

This is the teaching of Jesus. These are the words of Jesus. You may or may not like confrontation but that doesn’t change the fact that Jesus has called us to it.

Because Jesus taught it, we can see how Paul had a solid basis for “admonishing” his “beloved children” the way that he did. They had someone in their Church who was living in a terrible sin. It was not a misunderstanding or personality clash, it was willful disobedience to the commands of God.

And instead of following Jesus’ instructions as He has laid them out...they instead were proud of how tolerant, loving and progressive they had become as a Church…not unlike many people calling themselves followers of Jesus today.

If you haven’t turned there yet we are going to be in 1 Corinthians chapter 5, it’s on page 954 in the Bibles in the chairs if you want to turn there with us…and our first theme for the week is that...

Truth

1. Immorality in the church dishonors Christ, so repentance not tolerance is required. (1 Corinthians 5:1-3).

He is Paul’s admonition to the Church in Corinth...

1 Corinthians 5:1–3 (ESV)

1 It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that is not tolerated even among pagans, for a man has his father’s wife.

If you were with us last week then you know what a strong statement that this is. The city of Corinth was known to be a place where sexual immorality was the norm and the Christian idea of limiting this to just one man and one woman was laughable…Paul says that even by their twisted standards they even know that this is wrong - how can you accept it?

2 And you are arrogant! (somehow they were proud of there acceptance of this) Ought you not rather to mourn? Let him who has done this be removed from among you. 3 For though absent in body, I am present in spirit; and as if present, I have already pronounced judgment on the one who did such a thing

We don’t know if Paul just assumed that steps one and two had already happened, or if he was just admonishing them to get started with the process that he knew would end up going all the way to kicking him out of the fellowship.

I think that this is one of the reasons that Churches today rarely do anything that looks like Church discipline. They may be ok “admonishing” someone’s bad behavior, but to even start down a road that could lead to removing someone from the Church - no one wants to do that…but the stakes are just to high not to. If we allow someone calling themselves a Christian to continue living in sin then we are attaching the name of Jesus to that sinful lifestyle. That is serious business.

It seems that the Church in Corinth was hesitant about addressing this issue without their “Father” Paul being present but he tells them: “you know what you need to do, get it done!” He doesn’t want them throwing around the old adage, “Just you wait to your Father gets home!”…remember that one?…no he says the matter is already settled, you know what you are to do and the stake are too high for everyone involved…for both the individual who is living in the sin and the Church as a whole.

Our second theme theme then is...

2. Immorality in the church destroys the individual, so repentance not tolerance is called for. (1 Corinthians 5:4-5).

Paul tells them that...

1 Corinthians 5:4–5 (ESV)

. 4 When you are assembled in the name of the Lord Jesus and my spirit is present, with the power of our Lord Jesus, 5 you are to deliver this man to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord.

What is going on here? How do we “deliver someone over to Satan”? That sounds really bad, doesn’t it?

Wait a minute...Does that mean that it is ok to tell someone to “You just go to..” NO! That is not ok and not at all what is being said here, in fact this is exact opposite of that sentiment. We actually deliver them in order that they will be saved from the very damage that is reserved for Satan in hell!

Remember last week when we talked about the word “flesh” and how it is the Greek word “sarx” which can in one context mean just our human flesh that we are all born in, but it also can mean the sin nature that we are born in. That “sin nature” is what we need to put to death in order to become alive in the Spirit.

Romans 8:13 (ESV)

13 For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.

What is happening here is that this man is living in this unrepentant sin, he is living in the death of the flesh and no one is calling him on it. So he is coming into the fellowship each week and believing that when someone is talking about those who are in Christ Jesus, that includes him. He is not moved to make a change because he believes he is living in the Spirit when the truth is he is living according to the flesh…living in his sin.

Galatians 5:19–21 (ESV)

19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, 21 envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Wait a minute Pastor Dan, are you saying that anyone who has ever done any of these things are automatically disqualified from heaven and so they should be kicked out of the Church? It is a pretty long list and lets be honest we can probably all find ourselves somewhere on that list at least in one point in our lives.

What we need to know is that the word “do” here is in the active tense in Greek so that some translations rightly translate it as “make a practice of doing”. There is even a little footnote in my ESV Bibles to that effect.

This is not someone who messed up, gave into temptation and fell into making a decision in their flesh instead of the Spirit, if that were the case none of us would have any hope. This is someone who continues to do something that they know is wrong with no remorse and no desire for any change. Like a lawyer practicing law or a doctor practicing medicine they have committed themselves to future endeavors in the same direction. They have made it their practice to sin in this way.

That is why the Church’s role is so important here. Paul admonishes the church to put the man out of the church as a wake up call to who he truly is. He calls them to deliver him to the world—Satan’s realm of influence––so the man would see the error of his ways and repent and receive salvation on the Day of Judgment.

The goal is not to deliver punitive punishment.

The Goal is to see restoration through repentance.

It is not an act of love to overlook someone’s practice of sin, it is the very opposite of love. It is allowing them to continue on a destructive path that you know will hurt them. A true act of love would do whatever it takes to help them be right with God. Even if that means the hard choice of removing them from the fellowship.

Our problem often is that we don’t really even hate our own sin. We just don’t take it that seriously. We are more apt to excuse it, wink at it or joke about it then we are to truly hate it.

That just shows that we do not understand the destructive power that sin yields. If we did, then we would would be willing to do whatever it takes to keep ourselves or our loved ones from it…even if it came to having to remove them from our fellowship.

And this kind of sin isn’t just destructive to the individual practicing it, it will work it’s way into the entire congregation.

Immorality in the church dishonors Christ, destroys individuals and it...

3. [Immorality in the church] damages the Ekklesia, so repentance not tolerance is demanded (1 Corinthians 5:6-13).

Paul continues to say...

1 Corinthians 5:6-8 (ESV)

6 Your boasting is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump? 7 Cleanse out the old leaven that you may be a new lump, as you really are unleavened. For Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed. 8 Let us therefore celebrate the festival, not with the old leaven, the leaven of malice and evil, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.

Some of you may get what is being illustrated here because you bake homemade bread so you get the process that they are referring to, but for the rest of us… leaven is a piece of the old dough that is left out from the old loaf to ferment and be used again in the next loaf. The baker would mix the old leaven into their new dough to cause the bread to rise when it was baked.

In many places in Scripture, leaven is used as a metaphor of an invading sinful influence or corruption. Just like a little leaven will spread through all the dough and ALTER what is there, sin if it is not dealt with, can work it’s way through the whole church and have a destructive effect throughout.

This is why families who celebrate the Passover festival meal will remove all the old leaven from the house. This is to remember the Israelites on the first Passover who didn’t want any sign of who they used to be - slaves in Egypt - to be carried over into their new life of freedom in the promise land.

In the same way, we are called to work together to rid our lives of who we used to be - slaves to sin - and walk in the newness of life found through the good news of Jesus Christ. To daily partake of the the “unleavened” or “sinless” bread of sincerity and truth.

1 Corinthians 5:9–10 (ESV)

9 I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people— 10 not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world.

The city of Corinth was full of people who needed to hear the good news of the Gospel, and their lives reflected it. The Church in Corinth was to associate with those outside the Church who practiced these things in order to share the Gospel, but there was a different instruction for those who were inside the Church...

1 Corinthians 5:11-13 (ESV)

11 But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one. 12 For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? 13 God judges those outside. “Purge the evil person from among you.”

Immorality in the church, dishonors Christ, destroys individuals and damages the Church so repentance is required, called for and demanded

Gospel Application

This past Wednesday at our “Porchside Praise and Prayer night” I said that repentance is about more than just telling God you are sorry about something. Repentance is about placing yourself again under the saving power of the cross of Jesus Christ. It is about recognizing that this Christian walk thing is a journey and we are at times going to trip and fall. We are going to mess up.

But when we do, the Holy Spirit does not allow us to ignore it or pretend it doesn’t matter because we know that our sin separates us from God! So we repent, we confess our sin to Jesus, confess it to those we hurt and we turn from it again and get back on the right path.

1 John 1:9 (ESV)

9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

That is an essential aspect of what practicing righteousness looks like.

The practice of sin says I know it is wrong, but I am just going to keep living in this rebellion against God. That is such a dangerous place to be and it’s our job as an Ekklesia’s to love you enough to do whatever it takes to keep you from that place… to light the way.

Landing

So when I got these little flashlights in the mail the first thing I did was open one up to see how well they worked. I was really bummed when I pushed the button and saw no light coming out. I thought to myself - “Great, a dud. I wonder how many of these there are in here.”

But I did what most of us do when something doesn’t work and I started to take it apart. When I unscrewed the top I found that there was this little round disk blocking the power from getting to the light.

That got me thinking…I wonder how many of us have thought ourselves a “dud” when really there was just something blocking the power from getting through. Whether you have a flashlight or not, it is something to consider. What could be blocking the power of Jesus from radiating from your life? What could be getting in the way?

Because Church we need each other, we need each other to encourage us in our daily repentance where we once again align ourselves under the good news of the salvation found in Jesus Christ alone. Without that then we are standing in a dangerous place when it comes to God.

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