The Wisdom of Loss part II: The Court of Public Opinion
Notes
Transcript
Handout
Handout
The book of Job began with Job losing everything. He lost his wealth, he lost his family, and he lost his health. Why you ask? In the opening chapters we see an accuser stand before the throne and question God concerning Job’s loyalty. Satan the accuser believed Job only worshipped God because his blessings, so God allowed Satan to take away all that He had blessed Job with. Our story picks up today with a broken Job. His faith is rattled, his understanding of justice and of God is shaken, and he is broken and destitute. Here in his brokenness, Job is approached by his three friends.
11 Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this adversity that had come upon him, they came each one from his own place, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite; and they made an appointment together to come to sympathize with him and comfort him. 12 When they lifted up their eyes at a distance and did not recognize him, they raised their voices and wept. And each of them tore his robe and they threw dust over their heads toward the sky.
Have you ever heard the phrase, “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt”? Job’s friends apparently did not hear that phrase. For the next thirty-four chapters we see Job’s friends step in and prove themselves to be poor counselors.
Before we take a look
What does it mean to be a good counselor?
“a person trained to give guidance on personal, social, or psychological problems.” -Oxford Dictionary
Having counselors in your life is instrumental. A solid community that comes to your aid and points you to Jesus is a necessity.
14 Where there is no guidance the people fall, But in abundance of counselors there is victory.
Community creates within us a sense of
Belonging
11 And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ; 13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ. 14 As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming; 15 but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.
Accountability
1 Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted. 2 Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ. 3 For if anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. 4 But each one must examine his own work, and then he will have reason for boasting in regard to himself alone, and not in regard to another. 5 For each one will bear his own load.
Comfort
1 Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Unity
1 Therefore if there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, 2 make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. 3 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; 4 do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.
All these things were what Job desperately needed in his time of grief.
Poor councilors are a tool of Satan. The name Satan actually means accuser and rather than showing compassion and comfort we find Job’s friends meet his anguish with accusations.
Good counselors value compassion over condemnation
The first friend to speak with Job is Eliphaz. Eliphaz from the beginning of his statement responds gracelessly. These men had a very specific view of God. He rewards the righteous and punishes the wicked. Their view of God’s justice was very black and white. So Eliphaz sees the affliction of Job, and rather than sympathizing with him, he accuses him of doing something to deserve the punishment he was receiving. “Where is your faith? You helped others with such confidence and now you sit here in pity? Bad things only happen to bad people you must have done something to deserve this.” What a great way to encourage someone!
Job responds in the only way he can, he pleads his innocence. Job 6:14-30
14 “For the despairing man there should be kindness from his friend; So that he does not forsake the fear of the Almighty. 15 “My brothers have acted deceitfully like a wadi, Like the torrents of wadis which vanish, 16 Which are turbid because of ice And into which the snow melts. 17 “When they become waterless, they are silent, When it is hot, they vanish from their place. 18 “The paths of their course wind along, They go up into nothing and perish. 19 “The caravans of Tema looked, The travelers of Sheba hoped for them. 20 “They were disappointed for they had trusted, They came there and were confounded. 21 “Indeed, you have now become such, You see a terror and are afraid. 22 “Have I said, ‘Give me something,’ Or, ‘Offer a bribe for me from your wealth,’ 23 Or, ‘Deliver me from the hand of the adversary,’ Or, ‘Redeem me from the hand of the tyrants’? 24 “Teach me, and I will be silent; And show me how I have erred. 25 “How painful are honest words! But what does your argument prove? 26 “Do you intend to reprove my words, When the words of one in despair belong to the wind? 27 “You would even cast lots for the orphans And barter over your friend. 28 “Now please look at me, And see if I lie to your face. 29 “Desist now, let there be no injustice; Even desist, my righteousness is yet in it. 30 “Is there injustice on my tongue? Cannot my palate discern calamities?
Good friends stay in difficult seasons. They do not melt like the snow or wander away like a caravan. Job’s friend brought nothing but anguish to a Job who already had nothing left. Job attempts to cope by throwing his words to the wind. He knew what he was saying might not technically be theologically accurate, but he needed to express the grief that was like cancer in his heart. He tossed foolish words to the wind in hopes they would be met with compassion and comfort only for his friend to take his words as an opportunity to reprove and condemn. As a counselor your first response should be compassion not correction. A person in pain needs to hear words of grace and comfort.
The next friend Bildad doubles down on Eliphaz’ poor counseling. “You have forgotten God and are living in sin” which prompts Job to appeal to God. Job has no reason to lie about his condition. He truly sees himself as innocent and cannot understand why these things are happening to him. On top of it all he is forced to go through it alone. Zophar, the third friend, hoping to shed some light on the situation and maybe bring some comfort to Job says, “I wish God would judge you even more. You deserve everything you are getting. Your kids? Yeah they probably deserved to die because of what you have done. Your house and property, gone and with good reason. The boils and poor health you have is probably just like what you look like on the inside.”
Job is fed up with his friends comforts.
4 “But you smear with lies; You are all worthless physicians. 5 “O that you would be completely silent, And that it would become your wisdom!
1 Then Job answered, 2 “I have heard many such things; Sorry comforters are you all. 3 “Is there no limit to windy words? Or what plagues you that you answer? 4 “I too could speak like you, If I were in your place. I could compose words against you And shake my head at you. 5 “I could strengthen you with my mouth, And the solace of my lips could lessen your pain.
Despite all his hurting Job continued to trust in the Lord despite not understanding Him. He may feel like God hates him but he knows that there is no one greater than God alone.
15 “Though He slay me, I will hope in Him. Nevertheless I will argue my ways before Him. 16 “This also will be my salvation, For a godless man may not come before His presence.
In the midst of words tossed to the wind Job says this in chapter 19
25 “As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, And at the last He will take His stand on the earth. 26 “Even after my skin is destroyed, Yet from my flesh I shall see God; 27 Whom I myself shall behold, And whom my eyes will see and not another. My heart faints within me!
By faith Job knew that after he died he would stand before God. He would be redeemed. He would have new life.
Job’s friends continued to “counsel” him for twenty more chapters. Next week we will see how God responds to Job’s plea to make his case but until then lets talk about how we can show hope and help to hurting people.
Is there hope to be had when in difficult situations?
When we feel the pain of this world we have this hope: God is good in His nature, He works all things for our good even when we can’t see it, and this life is not all that there is.
“When darkness veils His lovely face I rest on His unchanging grace. In every high and stormy gale my anchor holds within the veil.”
16 Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. 17 For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, 18 while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.
Can we trust God in difficult situations?
Jesus suffered like us
14 Therefore, since the children share in flesh and blood, He Himself likewise also partook of the same, that through death He might render powerless him who had the power of death, that is, the devil, 15 and might free those who through fear of death were subject to slavery all their lives. 16 For assuredly He does not give help to angels, but He gives help to the descendant of Abraham. 17 Therefore, He had to be made like His brethren in all things, so that He might become a merciful and faithful high priest in things pertaining to God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people. 18 For since He Himself was tempted in that which He has suffered, He is able to come to the aid of those who are tempted.
For the choir director; upon Aijeleth Hashshahar. A Psalm of David. 1 My God, my God, why have You forsaken me? Far from my deliverance are the words of my groaning. 2 O my God, I cry by day, but You do not answer; And by night, but I have no rest. 3 Yet You are holy, O You who are enthroned upon the praises of Israel. 4 In You our fathers trusted; They trusted and You delivered them. 5 To You they cried out and were delivered; In You they trusted and were not disappointed. 6 But I am a worm and not a man, A reproach of men and despised by the people. 7 All who see me sneer at me; They separate with the lip, they wag the head, saying, 8 “Commit yourself to the Lord; let Him deliver him; Let Him rescue him, because He delights in him.” 9 Yet You are He who brought me forth from the womb; You made me trust when upon my mother’s breasts. 10 Upon You I was cast from birth; You have been my God from my mother’s womb. 11 Be not far from me, for trouble is near; For there is none to help. 12 Many bulls have surrounded me; Strong bulls of Bashan have encircled me. 13 They open wide their mouth at me, As a ravening and a roaring lion. 14 I am poured out like water, And all my bones are out of joint; My heart is like wax; It is melted within me. 15 My strength is dried up like a potsherd, And my tongue cleaves to my jaws; And You lay me in the dust of death. 16 For dogs have surrounded me; A band of evildoers has encompassed me; They pierced my hands and my feet. 17 I can count all my bones. They look, they stare at me; 18 They divide my garments among them, And for my clothing they cast lots. 19 But You, O Lord, be not far off; O You my help, hasten to my assistance. 20 Deliver my soul from the sword, My only life from the power of the dog. 21 Save me from the lion’s mouth; From the horns of the wild oxen You answer me. 22 I will tell of Your name to my brethren; In the midst of the assembly I will praise You. 23 You who fear the Lord, praise Him; All you descendants of Jacob, glorify Him, And stand in awe of Him, all you descendants of Israel. 24 For He has not despised nor abhorred the affliction of the afflicted; Nor has He hidden His face from him; But when he cried to Him for help, He heard. 25 From You comes my praise in the great assembly; I shall pay my vows before those who fear Him. 26 The afflicted will eat and be satisfied; Those who seek Him will praise the Lord. Let your heart live forever! 27 All the ends of the earth will remember and turn to the Lord, And all the families of the nations will worship before You. 28 For the kingdom is the Lord’s And He rules over the nations. 29 All the prosperous of the earth will eat and worship, All those who go down to the dust will bow before Him, Even he who cannot keep his soul alive. 30 Posterity will serve Him; It will be told of the Lord to the coming generation. 31 They will come and will declare His righteousness To a people who will be born, that He has performed it.
1 Who has believed our message? And to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed? 2 For He grew up before Him like a tender shoot, And like a root out of parched ground; He has no stately form or majesty That we should look upon Him, Nor appearance that we should be attracted to Him. 3 He was despised and forsaken of men, A man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; And like one from whom men hide their face He was despised, and we did not esteem Him. 4 Surely our griefs He Himself bore, And our sorrows He carried; Yet we ourselves esteemed Him stricken, Smitten of God, and afflicted. 5 But He was pierced through for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; The chastening for our well-being fell upon Him, And by His scourging we are healed. 6 All of us like sheep have gone astray, Each of us has turned to his own way; But the Lord has caused the iniquity of us all To fall on Him. 7 He was oppressed and He was afflicted, Yet He did not open His mouth; Like a lamb that is led to slaughter, And like a sheep that is silent before its shearers, So He did not open His mouth. 8 By oppression and judgment He was taken away; And as for His generation, who considered That He was cut off out of the land of the living For the transgression of my people, to whom the stroke was due? 9 His grave was assigned with wicked men, Yet He was with a rich man in His death, Because He had done no violence, Nor was there any deceit in His mouth. 10 But the Lord was pleased To crush Him, putting Him to grief; If He would render Himself as a guilt offering, He will see His offspring, He will prolong His days, And the good pleasure of the Lord will prosper in His hand. 11 As a result of the anguish of His soul, He will see it and be satisfied; By His knowledge the Righteous One, My Servant, will justify the many, As He will bear their iniquities. 12 Therefore, I will allot Him a portion with the great, And He will divide the booty with the strong; Because He poured out Himself to death, And was numbered with the transgressors; Yet He Himself bore the sin of many, And interceded for the transgressors.
Jesus is a good friend
13 “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. 14 “You are My friends if you do what I command you. 15 “No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you.
19 So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints, and are of God’s household,
6 Because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” 7 Therefore you are no longer a slave, but a son; and if a son, then an heir through God.
Jesus is a counselor
6 For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us; And the government will rest on His shoulders; And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.
28 “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. 29 “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 “For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
How can we be a friend to others who are hurting?
17 A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.
1. Be a listener. In order to be a friend to one who is hurting, listen more than you talk. God gave us two ears and one mouth. We need to use them accordingly. Be quick to hear and slow to speak. People who are suffering do not need a lecture; they need love. They do not need a sermon; they need sympathy.
2. Be humble. Do not try to explain everything. Eliphaz did not know what he was talking about. He believed he had all the divine mysteries figured out. He presumed to know why everything was going wrong in Job’s life. But in reality he did not have a clue. Do not pretend to know and explain everything.
3. Be positive. The flame of hope had been extinguished within Job’s heart. He needed to have that fire rekindled. He needed to be told, “Job, there is a bright tomorrow out there. God is going to work through this. We’re going to work through this together. God is going to work through this for good.” But Eliphaz was so focused on the negative that he had nothing positive to say. No wonder Job remained without hope. Eliphaz could only see what he thought were Job’s faults. He attacked Job’s shortcomings, but he never did see his strengths. To be a friend to someone who is hurting, we must look beyond that person’s faults to his needs.
4. Be balanced. What was missing from all that Eliphaz said was God’s love. All he saw was a God of strict justice, harsh judgment, swift discipline, and severe condemnation. He had a rigid view of God that allowed for no mercy or grace. Let us never fall into such a hole. If we are to help others who are hurting, we need to emphasize God’s love, tenderness, and mercy. God is both a God of judgment and a God of love. But one without the other is not God. Half the truth, when the whole truth is revealed, becomes no truth. There are people all around us who are going through difficult times. They need a friend just like you to help them through these days.
A story about good friends
17 On one of those days while he was teaching, Pharisees and teachers of the law were sitting there who had come from every village of Galilee and Judea, and also from Jerusalem. And the Lord’s power to heal was in him. 18 Just then some men came, carrying on a stretcher a man who was paralyzed. They tried to bring him in and set him down before him. 19 Since they could not find a way to bring him in because of the crowd, they went up on the roof and lowered him on the stretcher through the roof tiles into the middle of the crowd before Jesus. 20 Seeing their faith he said, “Friend, your sins are forgiven.” 21 Then the scribes and the Pharisees began to think to themselves, “Who is this man who speaks blasphemies? Who can forgive sins but God alone?” 22 But perceiving their thoughts, Jesus replied to them, “Why are you thinking this in your hearts? 23 Which is easier: to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up and walk’? 24 But so that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins”—he told the paralyzed man, “I tell you: Get up, take your stretcher, and go home.” 25 Immediately he got up before them, picked up what he had been lying on, and went home glorifying God. 26 Then everyone was astounded, and they were giving glory to God. And they were filled with awe and said, “We have seen incredible things today.”
These men did not accuse the paralytic of sin whereas others in that culture would have blamed a sin for his ailment. These men did not abandon the paralytic when it got tough to care for him. These men put the needs of their friend first and were willing to do whatever it took to help him in his need.
Questions for Reflection:
Are there any sins in my life that warrant the discipline of God?
Do I seek godly counsel when suffering affliction?
What is God teaching me as I suffer affliction?
When offering counsel to someone, do I give counsel that is in line with Scripture?
Am I more concerned with proving myself right or bringing healing to someone who is hurting?
Do I patiently listen to hurting friends before giving counsel?
Do I lovingly correct an erring brother or sister when he or she questions God?
Do I seek to understand the physical, mental, and spiritual pressure people feel when they are under great trauma?
Do I speak God’s wisdom or the world’s wisdom
Do I test my words before I speak?
Do I guard my mouth from slandering others?