Leaning into Pain

Several years ago, I had a friend who started going to a new dentist.

You know the drill whenever you go to a new place—there are a million forms to fill out at your first visit.

He was in a bit of a mood that day, so there were some questions he was brutally honest about. When the form asked what implements he used to clean his teeth, he answered honestly—toothbrush, floss, thumbtacks, paper clips, whatever he had on hand.

He decided to have a little fun with it, though, when it came to the question about allergies.

He didn’t have any allergies to speak of, so he simply put down one word: pain.

I hope the dentist got a kick out of it, but if we were honest, I imagine most of us would say the same thing—we are allergic to pain and discomfort of any kind.

That is what makes what God calls us to do in 1 Peter so difficult.

We want to avoid pain at all costs, but following Jesus often causes pain.

It is uncomfortable to push back against the culture, but as we will see this morning, it is worth it all.

In fact, jump down to the last verse we will be looking at this morning to see what God says about suffering for him…Look at 3:17...

Here’s what we are seeing this morning: suffering for Jesus is always worth the pain.

We will see that as Peter gives us three groups of commands. Each of these groups has a unique emphasis that shows how God makes suffering for and with Jesus worth it.

Let’s dive right in to see that we are called to...

1) Demonstrate Christ because it brings blessing.

Over the past two weeks, we have looked at how to live honorably among the Gentiles.

We have seen that God calls us to submit to the authorities he placed over us and model Christ in our marriages.

As Peter shifts to a new section, he calls us again to demonstrate Christ.

This isn’t about submission and authority; rather, it is about maintaining right relationships anyone.

They may be peers, family and friends, saved followers of Christ and lost enemies.

The attitudes and actions he lists in verses 8-9 are all attitudes and actions we see demonstrated in Christ, so God is calling us to demonstrate Christ in every relationship we have.

The first characteristics seem to apply to the way we relate to other exiles; other Christians who are part of God’s kingdom.

Look back at the first part of verse 8...

We are called to “like-mindedness.” This is one of the key components of unity that God often calls believers to develop.

This is the idea of literally thinking the same thing. That doesn’t mean that we will think the same thing about everything though.

For example, how many of you think cilantro tastes like stink bugs? How many of you think it is one of the best herbs out there and would walk around with it in your teeth all day if you have the chance?

We can disagree on things like that, and even more significant items.

However, as believers, our ultimate purpose in life should be the same. We should want to do whatever we can to honor and exalt Jesus as our king.

We may disagree about the best way to do that, and we may not see eye to eye on every little detail of Scripture.

However, we show like-mindedness when we put exalting Christ at the head of everything.

Our unity continues as we act with sympathy for each other.

Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to talk to someone when they have been through something similar to what you have?

We find that in support groups for substance abuse, or for families who have gone through the trauma of miscarrying or losing a child—there is a different level of sympathy among those who have common experiences.

If that’s true, then, then our common life as exiles, our common salvation in Christ, and our common kingdom citizenship should open us up and help us be more sympathetic to others who are walking through similar struggles as they seek to honor Jesus.

This works itself out practically in the sacrificial love we show for each other.

Just like Jesus has sacrificed himself for us, we seek to demonstrate Christ to other believers by cultivating a sacrificial love for each other.

The next two attributes seem to form a bridge as we shift from our relationships to other believers to our relationship to those in the world who don’t know Christ.

We don’t have the same goals and purpose in life with those who don’t know Jesus, so we can’t be like-minded with them.

Our sympathy and love for other believers is also different than the love we show to the world because we don’t have the commonality in Christ.

However, to both groups, we can show compassion and humility.

With believers, that isn’t terribly difficult. After all, we are all on the same team.

What about when it is people who don’t like that you are following Jesus?

That’s where things get even more difficult.

Look back at verse 9…

It is one thing to be nice to people when you are on the same team, but it is something completely different when you are dealing with people who are actively fighting against you.

As God gives us this command, though, I hope it reminds you of a passage we looked at a few weeks ago. Look back one chapter at 1 Peter 2:21-23.

He uses almost the same language, reminding us that we are called to follow the model that Christ has set for us.

Jesus was insulted, but he didn’t insult back. People did terrible, evil things to him, and yet he went to the cross and died, asking God the Father to forgive them because they didn’t realize what they were doing.

In fact, while they were killing him, he was also taking the penalty for your sin and mine, becoming the way of salvation for anyone who will call out to him and be saved.

Leaning in to pain, then, means putting my brothers and sisters in Christ ahead of my own wants and desires.

It means blessing people who hate me, who insult me, and who sin against me.

Why?

Because God promises a blessing to those who are his.

We have seen throughout the letter that he is preparing an inheritance for us. It is in heaven, right now, waiting for us to get there or for him to bring it here when he returns.

It is better for me to hold my tongue and even bless others because I know that God has a blessing waiting for me.

The suffering we may endure for Christ will one day give way to the blessing he has been preparing for us all along.

With that said, honoring Christ like this isn’t just about what will come in the future.

Peter goes on to show that we should…

2) Devote yourself to doing good because it brings God’s attention.

Read verses 10-13.

Like Peter has done throughout the letter, he looks back to what God taught the Israelites in the Old Testament and applies it to those who follow Christ now.

He quotes from Psalm 34 to remind us that honoring Christ is the way to live the most fulfilling life we can find.

You and I were created for a relationship with God where we honor him and learn from him and enjoy life together with him.

That’s why verse 10 says that this is the way to good days and a life you can love.

It isn’t always easy, but you can live with the constant knowledge that you are loved by the God of the universe.

That’s not based on our ability to do the right thing; instead, God loves us because he loves us!

He drew us into his kingdom not because we are smart or because we are beautiful or handsome or because we would be a real asset to the team; rather, he drew us to himself simply because he loves us.

If you want to love your life, devote yourself to living for him!

Notice the emphasis of several of these commands— “let him keep,” “seek peace and pursue it,” “devoted to what is good.”

If you say someone is a devoted fan of something, what do you mean? We use that phrase a lot with a devoted fan of a sports team.

What does that mean? They wear their merch, they know all the players and the stats, they watch every game, and they will fight you if you say something bad about their team. They are devoted fans.

Sometimes you think about a devoted mom or a devoted dad—someone who sacrifices to take care of their kids and their families. They put a bigger priority on their kids than their own needs.

So, what does it mean to be devoted to what is good?

It means we are making being and doing good a priority because God is good.

We don’t just watch our words once; we strive to keep our tongues from harming others and lying.

We pursue peace, striving for reconciliation when others would give up on relationships or injustice around them.

We devote ourselves to learning what is good and making sure our lives line up with the standards God has set.

Why?

Look back at the statements in verse 12…

Because living in a God-honoring way gets God’s attention.

Let’s be clear: God is always aware of everything going on in all of creation at all times.

This verse doesn’t imply that God is only notices when we do good things.

Rather, as we honor our king, we see him guiding us more clearly.

He sees everything, but devoting ourselves to good demonstrates that we are his, and it allows us to walk in his favor.

He sees everything that is going on, and his ears are open to our prayers.

On the days you doubt his care or his concern, remember that he is attentive to those who are his.

However, for those who oppose Christ, they will find God is against them.

They will never know the peace that believers experience now, and they won’t have any part of the inheritance and blessing God has laid up for those who are his.

In light of that, let me ask: how devoted are you to doing good? How much time did you spend this week looking at your life and making sure you were watching your words, that you were pursuing peace, and that you were devoted to honoring the God who saved you?

Is there something that is causing you to doubt whether or not he cares? His eyes are toward you, if you are his, and his ears are open and hearing your prayers.

We may not understand why he is doing what he is doing, but we can have peace that he knows what he is up to, and he knows what is going on with us.

Let’s look back at verse 13 before we move on.

If we put this in context, we see that there is no way he is telling us that everyone will like us and nothing will go wrong in our lives if we follow Jesus.

What he is telling us is the same thing Jesus told his disciples: even if someone kills you, they cannot ultimately harm you.

Luke 12:4–5 CSB

“I say to you, my friends, don’t fear those who kill the body, and after that can do nothing more. But I will show you the one to fear: Fear him who has authority to throw people into hell after death. Yes, I say to you, this is the one to fear!

Devote yourself to good—God is watching.

If we are demonstrating Christlikeness and devoting ourselves to doing good, then it is likely we will find someone who will confront us on what we believe.

Leaning into that pain means we will...

3) Defend your hope because Jesus is Lord.

Read verses 14-17...

We have seen that we are blessed, even when we are suffering for Christ.

The fact we are blessed doesn’t give us an excuse to retreat, hide, and wait for God to judge those who oppose him.

Instead, we are called to defend the hope that we have been given.

It can feel really scary to step out and start talking about Jesus.

“What if they make fun of me?” “What if they are smarter than me and ask questions I can’t answer?” and other doubts can paralyze us and keep us from speaking up.

However, we can’t be intimidated by those challenges.

Instead, we need to “regard Christ the Lord as holy.”

That means that, at our core, we have to recognize that Jesus is the one in charge of everything. He is the king, he is the ruler, he is Lord.

What does that word “holy” mean? Set apart.

In my own heart, I need to set him apart from everything else. Jesus has to be more important than my relationships, my reputation, my career, my security, my safety—I need to set him apart as the most important person and priority in every aspect of my life.

If that’s true, then I don’t have to fear losing anything or being intimidated by anyone, because whatever I am doing, I am trying to do to honor the King who loved me enough to die for me.

If I am setting him apart in my heart, I need to be ready to defend the hope I have.

This is the part that scares a lot of people. There has been a tremendous amount written over the years about how to defend the faith against all kinds of challenges.

It is a field called “apologetics,” and it is incredibly helpful to those of us who find ourselves either personally wrestling with what we believe or helping others who are wrestling through it.

However, that can sometimes scare people away from even talking about Jesus because they don’t have all the answers to the philosophical and historical challenges to faith.

If you want to dip your feet into this kind of study, I would point you to this book: Questioning Evangelism by Randy Newman. In it, he makes a clear point for using questions to help our friends find out more about Jesus. He also takes several chapters helping you respond to some of the big questions people ask.

I would encourage anyone to learn more about apologetics and defending the faith that way, but here’s the great news: this isn’t just for the folks who have studied those fields in depth.

Instead, Peter is calling all believers to be ready to talk about who Jesus is and what he has done for them.

We are going to talk more this fall about how to share your faith, but defending your faith can start simply by telling people about the difference Jesus has made for you.

Talk about who you were before you met Jesus, something you struggled with. Tell them how you came to know about Jesus, and then tell them what difference he has made in your life.

When they ask, “Why do bad things happen to good people,” you may have to go find an answer. In the moment, though, you can say, “I don’t really know, honestly. I will get back to you on that. I do know, though, that I wasn’t the best person before I met Jesus, and he did the greatest thing for me.”

Defend the hope you have in Christ!

There is clear word of warning here: We need to defend our hope without getting defensive.

Look at verse 16...

Our responses need to be gentle, reverent toward Christ and respectful toward people.

Responding that way keeps our conscience clean before God and before those who accuse us, keeping them from having any more reason to reject Christ.

You aren’t trying to “own the libs” or whatever you think. Instead, with gentleness and reverence, you are pointing to who Christ is and letting the Holy Spirit bring conviction as he will.

Even if that brings suffering, it is better to suffer for honoring Christ that way than to suffer because you are an arrogant jerk that has made everyone mad around you.

That’s going to call us to lean into the pain.

We have to hold our tongue, not insulting people back, but instead demonstrating Christ.

We have to devote ourselves, commit ourselves to doing the good that God has left us here to do, because that brings the unique attention of God to our lives.

We have to defend our hope, because Jesus is Lord and I want everyone to honor him as they should.

“Sean, there’s no way I can do that. Like your friend, I am allergic to pain.”

You are right—none of us can do this perfectly. There is only one person in all of history who did that, and that’s Jesus.

Now, as we have seen throughout 1 Peter and other passages we have studied, if you are his, then he is living inside you.

You can demonstrate Christ, because Christ is the one doing it through you!

You can devote yourself to good, because the spirit of Christ is at work in you to empower you.

You can respond gently and reverently to those who question you about your hope because the Holy Spirit is giving you words as you need them.

It isn’t about you; it’s about resting in Jesus and letting him live through you.

As you lean into the pain, you are leaning into opportunities to see Jesus work in greater ways than you could ever imagine.

Are you willing to follow him like that, even when it hurts?